Conflicting Numbers
by Tylida Doradelo
Summary: Gaignun and Jr. are living peacefully in the time after episode one. Gaignun starts realizing his feelings for his older brother might be more than he'd thought, but Albedo's not giving him the chance to confess it. GaignunxJr.xAlbedo. M just in case.
1. The Game

A/N: Hello! CX It's Tylida again with yet another attempt at the absolute greatness that is Jr./Rubedo! Hooray! This story is a fanfic. It's a battle for Jr.! XD Who wouldn't fight over Jr. anways? Well lemme say this before I begin: This story really has no actual timeline in the series. I'll try to put pieces of the storyline into it, but I like the freedom of being able to put whoever I want whenever I want however I want at random intervals. So I'm sorry if it's a little AU. It starts around the beginning of the second game just to give the story a base. Blah blah blah. Yaoi is fantastic. On with the fic! CX

I am my own editor. I make mistakes I'm human. So don't be surprised at the overuseage or underuseage of commas or other grammatical tools as well as the new ways of spelling words. C:

I do no own Xenosaga or it's characters and that makes me dead inside.

To my sama. You inspire my every move and I hope you'll allow me to serve you always.  
And also to Ellen. XD You won't understand a word, but you wanted it so here it is.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 1  
The Game

Gaignun leaned back against the door. He was certain that no one would open this particular one. He didn't want to do this but Helmer had asked and he couldn't deny a man that had helped him so much before. Would reconnassiance really be that bad? He sighed. Better to get it over with now than standing and complaining to himself. He took another deep breath, closed his eyes and raised two fingers to his left temple. The spiritual link that he and his brothers used was a familiar tool, but he and Jr. used it more often than he and Albedo. His wavelength was unfamiliar as Gaignun searched for him.

"Now Albedo..." Gaignun said to himself. He eyes glowed a bright teal, "Where are you?"

The connection...his prescence...it's there and then...

"Nigredo!"

"Well hello there. Looks like you're doing well unfortunatley."

"And you're glib as ever. What's wrong? Are you lonley little baby?"

"Oh, I'm just doing a little information gathering." he stated in his calm voice. He paused only for a brief second before adding, "Of course...it still isn't too late for us to come to terms." What a ridiculous thing to say. He knew what Albedo's reaction would be.

"Oh, so now it's peace talks, huh? Didn't McCartney say that too? Ebony and Ivory live together in perfect harmony?" Albedo laughed. It wasn't a delighted laugh, but a dark one. "But I know your true form. Executioner!"

Gaignun ignored his word attacks, trying to keep his emotions confined. "I shed that skin long ago." he replied cooly.

"Is that so?" Albedo asked, nonbelieving, "Are you sure you're not just hanging around Rubedo for a chance to carry out your mission?"

Gaignun ignored him. He was skilled in dealing with Albedo's madness. He wasn't going to let him manipulate him like Jr. Gaignun was control, he was sensibility, and he was maintaining and stable until Albedo said, "I'll be borrowing Rubedo soon. I don't need you though. Still, I look forward to your efforts nonetheless."

Nigredo pushed himself from the door, his eyes burning into the wall across from him.

"Wait, no!"

A sharp, powerful force, emanated from Gaignun's mind as his eyes flashed. There was a cry from Albedo as the force exploded in his arm, destroying the limb completely.

"Ach!" Albedo bent over in surprise, gripping his shoulder lightly.

"Ooo, scary, scary! You've always been two-faced, you know." he spoke as the arm began to reform itself. "Offering life in the one hand and delivering death in the other. Too bad I can't die!"

The sound of his madness echoed through Gaignun's mind. There was a loud metallic noise and the link was severed. Albedo was gone.

* * *

Gaignun gasped. His eyes opening onto the canopy of his bed. Mary and Shelley each had a head on his shoulder. Mary's arm wrapped around his neck and Shelley's around his waist. He sighed. This image just wouldn't leave him mind. Everytime he closed his eyes there it was. Albedo's insane laughter, his dark intention. Gaignun silently opened a small link in his anxious thoughts. Jr. was asleep, only his mind responded softly at the tugging on the wavelength. Gaignun shut it down before Jr. awoke. He didn't want to disturb him. His green eyes searched the canopy in the darkness for what he didn't know. He was so fortunate. He had everything. What man wouldn't want to be in his position right now? Two beautiful women, riches, power...but what he wouldn't give to trade it all for...

Gaignun gently and smoothly made his way out of his cage of limbs. He grabbed a robe hanging by the door to cover himself and made his way down the dark corridors of the Durandal. Every night since that encounter with Albedo he'd been worrying nonstop about his brother.

"My brother..." Gaignun muttered to himself bitterly, "My son."

Jr.'s room wasn't far way from Gaignun's so he didn't have to go far at all. He stopped before the door to listen, but there was no noise. He took another step and the door slid open. The room was dark, but Gaignun could hear Jr.'s snoring. The sound made him smile to himself. He took a step into the room. Jr. was such a heavy sleeper, almost nothing woke him up, but Gaignun still walked with caution. That was just him. Jr. slept, sprawled in his bed, the sheet wrapped crazily around his legs and waist as if someone had tied him up that way. His boxers and tank top were twisted along with the sheets and Gaignun wondered how he could sleep like that. His hair was mussed, mouth open, and an empty gun lie in his left hand. Jr. and his guns. Gaignun smiled and leaned down to run a hand through his hair, but stopped himself. No. That wasn't right. He wasn't supposed to touch Jr. He pulled back, but he wanted to touch him. To explore every inch of him. He bit his lip. He needed to go. He needed to leave, Albedo wasn't there, Jr. was fine. But something kept him there. Something held him in his place. His eyes watched the rise and fall of the red head's chest and the occassional frown that passed across his face. Finally, Gaignun tore himself away from Jr. and walked back to his room.

Gaignun never got enough sleep. Or at least that's what Jr. thought. And Jr. was always vocal about what he thought. "Jeez Gaignun, you look like someone punched you in the face."

"Thanks Jr." Gaignun said sarcastically, sipping at his cup of coffee.

Jr. walked farther into Gaignun's room. He jumped up onto Gaignun's desk and folded his arms. "You been sleeping like a hobo? Maybe Mary and Shelley should take a break from their um..." Jr. coughed, "duties. What do you say? You might actually get some rest."

Gaignun didn't think he should even dignify that statement with an answer and picked up a document that needed his signature. Jr. just shrugged at his brother's facade. "Hey, I'm just saying. You can live without sex one night, can't you?"

Gaignun choked on his coffee and shot a glare at Jr. who smirked and jumped down. "You know," Gaignun started, cleaning up his mess. "If you're going to disturb me this early in the morning you could at least put some clothes on."

Jr. looked down at his tank top and boxers and raised an eyebrow at his younger brother.

"You got a problem?"

"No, I just find it inappropriate for my son to be walking around without clothes. Who knows what might happen to him." Jr. growled and Gaignun smirked.

"Yes, father." Jr. spat before leaving to change.

"chaos!" Jr. shouted as greeting to his friend.

Gaignun heard chaos' smooth, hypnotic voice respond, "Oh, good morning Jr. I see you're still naked."

"Oh please, not you too!" Gaignun chuckled at his response. "I'm a man damnit!"

Gaignun, in his disbelief opened a link.

_That is completely irrelevant, Jr._

_Shut the fuck up, Gaignun! _Jr. responded, walking toward his room. _Why can't I just live!?_

Gaignun shook his head and got started on his paperwork, leaving a substantial amount for Jr. seeing as how there was an agreeable amount of peace right now and Jr. could actually do some of it. He wouldn't like it, but Gaignun didn't care. In fact, he even got the brilliant idea to set the paperwork aside in a "special place" for Jr. on his desk and wondered if he should go as far as to wrap it up for him. He was in the process of opening drawers in search of ribbon he knew wasn't there when Mary came through the door of his room. He raised an eyebrow at her and straightened himself up. "Hello, Mary."

"Hey there, Master Gaignun!" the cheery blonde said happily, waving to him. He gave her the sly smile he knew she wanted to see.

"Is there something I can help you with?" He asked, closing his open drawers and checking paperwork. She shrugged and jumped into his lap. "I was bored and Shelley's got nothing for me to do. Is there anything here I can do?" She leaned down to kiss his cheek, her curly hair brushing against him.

He sighed and patted her waist. "Nothing like that, Mary. I do appreciate the offer though." She giggled and straightened herself up. "Well then, how 'bout that paperwork over there? Ya'll always have so much to do. I wouldn't mind trying to help you finish that myself." Gaignun grinned to himself and shook his head. "Oh," Mary said, smiling, "You're saving that for the Little Master, aren't 'cha?"

"Perhaps you know me too well."

Mary giggled and jumped up. "Say, where is the Little Master anyways? I haven't seen him all day."

Gaignun's demeanor quickly changed from relaxed to alert. His green eyes tightened. "He hasn't come to the bridge?" Jr. always went to the bridge. He was practically captain. Gaignun almost never gave orders. It was Jr.'s responsibility to oversee things, make decisions. The worried U.R.T.V. checked his watch. It had been almost five hours since Jr. had waltzed in to announce he had awoken. Plenty of time for something...something bad. Mary shook her head, not realizing the frightened look on Gaignun's face. "I figured he was with you or maybe with Canaan, but I say Canaan today and he wasn't with him so I looked on the Elsa and then thought maybe he was sick or somethin'."

Nigredo only nodded, "Thank you, Mary. Go back to the bridge. I'll...I'll find Jr."

* * *

Jr. changed in the usual dramatic fashion he did whenever he wanted to waste time and he was doing a good job of it. chaos had followed Jr. and was standing in the room watching as the tempermental redhead threw clothes this way and that. "Jr., you don't have to throw these clothes around you know? It's just making a big mess for you to clean up." Jr. didn't listen and continued to ignore his friend in his search for clothes. He finally settled on a maroon sweater and a long red cape with black designs on the neck and shoulder. He pulled on some light brown pants and boots and smiled up at chaos. "Done."

chaos shook his head, "You're something else, Jr."

"I'll just take that as a compliment". Jr said, waving a hand. chaos laughed. "So, where to Jr.? The bridge?"

Jr. tilted his head to one side. "Nah, if I head that way Gaignun's sure to have some paperwork ready for me. I'm kinda hungry. How 'bout we skip the morning and go hang around Miltia for a while?"

"I don't know, Jr. Gaignun might get upset. Shouldn't we at least tell him?"

Jr. made a noise and elbowed his friend. "Hey, I'm the brains behind the Foundation here. Why do you think I go on all the adventures and he sits and does paperwork?"

chaos smiled, "You do paperwork too, Jr."

Jr. rolled his eyes and put a hand on chaos' shoulder, "And that's why we're avoiding him. So that I don't have to do it. Get it?"

chaos didn't want to give in that easily, but he reluctantly agreed and together, the left for the dock where they could take the shuttle from the Durandal to Second Miltia. "chaos! How long has it been since we were here? It feels like forever."

chaos shrugged, "I'm not sure. It's been almost a year at least."

"They've upgraded. Let's see what's new."

Jr. took his time wandering aroudn the white, metalliclike plastic that covered the planet. But Jr. had never been one for paths and he eventually found themselves on the outskirts of the city. "Jr...."chaos said, looking around at the trees and tall grasses, "I think...we're lost."

Jr. only waved a hand to dismiss chaos' words. "We're not lost. We're_ exploring._"

chaos sweatdropped at his small friend, "Well, we've explored ourselves right off the road."

"And you've talked me right into the most boring conversation I've ever had."

chaos was about to respond when Jr. raised a hand to silence him. "chaos! Look at this place!!" Jr. exclaimed. He took off running for a small, old wooden Japanesse fashoined house. chaos shook his head and followed him. Jr. stopped in front of the house and pointed to a black and white sign. "chaos! Check this out! It's a bookstore! And it's made entirely out of wood! Aw, Gaignun's got to see this!"

Before chaos could see what Jr. had pointed at, he had run through the open door. "Wow!!" came an excited voice from inside. chaos hurried to see an overly excited Jr. grabbing books off shelves and loading them into his arms. "Oh man I can't believe they have this! Oh I've got to get this one! And that one above your head! Yeah that one! A-and this one! I can't leave without that one!"

"Jr., no one's here. Maybe we should at least wait until someone comes out." chaos said, his soothing voice had no affect on the U.R.T.V though and he continued to pile novels upon novels into his small arms. When he ran out of arm space he he recruited chaos and soon the poor seraph had a stack as tall and almost as heavy as Jr. Nothing could stop the tornado that was Jr. "Jr. how are we going to get all of these back to the Durandal?" chaos asked from his sea of literature.

"We're going to carry them, of course." Jr. responded. His own stack was higher than his head when a voice from behind him said, "Well hello there. I see you're really enthusiastic about reading material, aren't you?"

Jr. could see through a small hole surrounding his face under his stack of books as a tall man in a black kimono helped relieve chaos of his armload. "Thank you." chaos said, his eyes sparking with gratitude and his voice filled with relief. "Well," the man laughed. "I never thought I'd find chaos under all those books."

"Jin Uzuki!" chaos said, happily, "It's been a long time."

"It certainly has. And who's hiding under this stack?"

"Gaignun Kukai Jr." Jr. said, holding his books protectively.

"Jr.?"

chaos and Jr. turned in time to see Shion come through a door behind a small desk that Jr. had thought was most likely the resgister.

"Shion! What are you doing here?"

She rolled her pretty green eyes and pulled at her Vector uniform. "I'm visiting Jin. He's my...my brother." she admitted.

"Oh, why didn't I catch that before?" chaos asked, smiling politely at the two of them.

"You're both friends of Shion?" Jin asked. "Hm..would you two care to stay? I'm sure Shion would like that."

"I don't know..."chaos started, "We shouldn't intrude on a family reunion..." he started, feeling a bit awkward, but he saw Shion in the background, waving her arms and begging them to stay.

"But of course, we could take you up on your offer."

Jr., who had been polite and quiet until now, suddenly spoke up when chaos went to take his books. "Come on, Jr. let's go."

"Aw, come on! What-what about these!?"

"You can buy all the books you want later, let's go."

* * *

Jr. walked slowly back to the Durandal. After spending time with Shion and her brother, he suddenly felt sick. All they'd done was fight and Jr. really didn't like it when siblings fought. chaos had stayed behind as a sort of medium between the two. Jr. walked back a little slower than usual, his hand on his right chest. _Albedo..._

When he finally made it back to the Durandal he felt worse than he had before. "Maybe I'll sleep a little before I start my torture with Gaignun." he said to himself. He walked down the corridors, making sure to go a way that Gaignun wouldn't see him. The farther and farther he walked, the worse and worse he began to feel. He placed a hand on his head and tried to shake his fogging vision clear. The walls of the Durandal began to shift and spin in slow spirals around him. Jr. shook his head. What was happening to him? He stumbled against a wall, slamming into it hard when he'd only meant to rest there for a moment. He shook his head harder and struggled his way into his room. The door slid open and shut behind him. The minute the door closed, the room began to fade into darkness. He fell to the floor, coughing violently. He desperatley tried to open a link, to call for Gaignun, but his spritual link wouldn't even spark up. It was darkened by this abyss. This deep blackness that was dragging him down into nothing. Where...where had he felt this before...? There! That sadistic laugh. The voice that was covered in madness...the waves of...of...

"Yo, Rubedo."

And then he fainted.

* * *

A/N: Yay! CX First chapter up. I'm very excited about this story. I've been wanting to write a yaoi. I hope this one works out. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	2. The Players

* * *

A/N: Wow, another update already? No way! XD Yeah, I know right? It's weird. Decided I should get this written down before the idea flew away. Anyway, here it is!

I do not own Xenosaga or it's characters and I can not express in words how upset this makes me. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 2  
The Players

Gaignun had no idea where to start first. He was beginning to panic. He tried again and again to open a link but there was no response, as if the minds avaliable on the other end had been, well disconnected. He shook his head to try and clear his thoughts. He had to focus. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He struggled to establish a small opening and was delighted to get a response.

_Jr._ he sent, relief echoing off the walls of his mind. But there was no response, just the mental knowledge that he was there. Worry took hold over Gaignun again. _Jr. what's wrong? Where are you?_ No response. Gaignun tried to create a stronger link, to be able to search Jr.'s mind, hoping to find that Jr. was simply ignoring him or pretending to be silent to purposely stress him out as he'd done that before. Something was blocking his presence though and no matter how desperatley he tried he couldn't get a stronger connection. He was up now, determined to search the whole ship and planet for Jr., certain now that something was wrong.

_Jr., just tell me where you are_. But still there came no answer. Gaignun wouldn't give up though and he clung to their small link as if it were his lifeline. He was searching random rooms in the Durandal when Jr. finally sent him something. _Gai..._

Gaignun stopped in his tracks. Jr. he sent, his mind in a frenzy.

_Gaig...nun..I can't..._

_Can't what, Jr.? Can't what?_

But that was all Gaignun was going to get. He felt a clamp on his link and then silence. He had to find Jr.

* * *

Jr. felt so light in his arms. Albedo loved the feeling. Weak. Red was so weak compared to White! Jr. tried to move, tried to will his body to move. To at least stand against his enemy. Albedo only laughed, holding the limp boy with a single arm wrapped around his back.

"Ah, Rubedo. How wonderful you feel when you're helpless."

Jr. frowned. _Let go of me you bastard or I'll-_

"Or you'll what, Rubedo? Haven't you noticed that you have no control over your body?"

Albedo leaned forward, bending Jr.'s back and bringing him closer. Albedo traced the tip of his nose along the line of Jr.'s jaw. Jr. tensed, or tried to, but Albedo's hold over him was too strong. How had he come across a power this strong?

"I've been searching and searching Rubedo. For something like this."

_What the hell are you talking about?_

Jr. lie helpless in Albedo's arms as the he moved his lips down toward his ear. "So that I could have you, my sweet Rubedo."

Jr.'s deep blue eyes widened and he again tried to will his body to move and failed miserably much to Albedo's amusement. Jr. couldn't think, he couldn't move. He tried constantly to remove the black haze hovering in his mind. He needed to call Gaignun, he needed to get help. He needed something, someone anything to give him leverage over Albedo. "How does it feel, Rubedo? To be deemed powerless. You're not used to such a feeling are you? Leader, Variant number six-six-six."

_When I get free-_

Laughter cut across his thoughts like a sonic wave and Albedo deftly removed Jr.'s guns out of his back pockets and tossed them across the room. "You were never strong to begin with. Relying on toys. Are you that afraid of yourself, Rubedo?"

_You should be afraid of me! I swear, Albedo!_

"Barking, barking, barking. Is that all you do, Rubedo? Where is this amazing power? The power to destroy my disease? My existence? Show it to me."

Albedo wrapped both arms around Jr.'s small frame and lifted him entirely off the ground.

"Can you feel it, Rubedo? Can you still feel the beating in your right chest?"

_Albedo...? What are you..._

_Jr.!_ Jr. watched a sick smile spread on Albedo's lips.

"So your hero has come to save you."

Jr. struggled to fight, again to no avail. _This is between you and me, Albedo. Leave Gaignun alone._

"Oh, you care more about your executioner than your own twin?"

_What the hell are you--_

_Jr., just tell me where you are!_

_Gaignun! Gaignun I can't! Just leave, I'll be ok. I'm fine! _Jr. tried to send, but the message was choppy and probably wouldn't reach him. Albedo tugged roughly on Jr.'s long, cape-like jacket and tossed it to the floor, rubbing his pale face against the young skin on Jr.'s neck.

_Stop this, Albedo! _

"Why protest? I want you and if I can't have you, no one can."

_Can't what, Jr.? Can't what?_

Albedo obliterated the link. He shut it down so hard that it caused a dangerous ringing in Jr.'s ears, making him even sicker than before. Albedo tossed him effortlessly onto the bed in the room. Jr. tried once again to break free of Albedo's strange hold over him, but couldn't. So instead of trying to fight against Albedo in such an obvious way, Jr. quietly opened another link, a frequency that only Gaignun could hear. He focused all his energy into that particular spot, trying to keep it from him. He sent a quick message to Gaignun, letting him know he where he was for only a split second before Albedo was ontop of him. _Albedo, stop!_ Jr. sent, trying to pretend that he was as helpless as Albedo wanted him to be. Albedo laughed, loving the sound of desperation in the variant's voice. "That's right, Rubedo! Beg for me to stop! Protest! Let me hear you."

Albedo ran a hand up Jr.'s sweater, playing with his skin under his white, clawed gloves. Jr. let out a mental gasp and Albedo clung to it.

_That wasn't pleasure._

"You can deny what you want, Rubedo." Albedo whispered, biting down on Jr.'s neck hard.

Jr. winced, but Albedo didn't release until he felt the metallic, copper flavored liquid escape Jr.'s neck. Albedo let up on his hold so that he could hear the small cry that escaped Jr.'s throat.

"What the hell? You bastard!?"

Albedo didn't respond, only scrapped his clawed gloves along Jr.'s abdomen before surprising him with a kiss. Jr. tried so hard to pull away, but Albedo pressed hard against him, forcing his way into Jr.'s mouth. Jr. tasted blood on the monster's tongue and wished more than ever he could spit it out. Albedo quickly lowered his hands to Jr.'s pants, pulling at the buttons there and slowly (to torment Jr. more) pulled on the zipper, never breaking his attack on Jr.'s mouth. Jr.'s cries of protest were muffled by Albedo's mouth as he reached the top of Jr.'s boxers. He started to rip them, tearing the fabric with his claws when the door to Jr.'s room opened.

"Albedo!"

Albedo didn't jump to the voice, having expected that Gaignun would find them sooner or later, and instead continued his lustful kiss, finally pullling back when an audible growl and a destroyed limb caught his attention. He reacted to his missing limb as a student might to a broken pencil. He raised a white eyebrow at him, mocking amethyst eyes and a sadistic smile covered his face.

"Nigredo, so nice of you to join us."

Gaignun stood, shaking with anger. "What are you doing here?!"

Albedo laughed, standing on his newly formed leg and pulling Jr. up into a sort of sitting position as if he were a rag doll. "Calm down, Nigredo. I was only playing with him. Why, it was just a simple kiss."

"Albedo, let him go or I'll..."

"Empty threats! The both of you! Such worthless words!" Albedo laughed. His eyes bore into Gaignun's green ones. "Are you jealous, Nigredo? Is this what you want?"

Albedo bent Jr. over the side of the bed until he was upside down, Gaignun's eyes instantly landed on the wound that was bleeding along his neck and into his ear from the angle he was slanted. Albedo bent down to him, that sick smile forever planted on his lips, lowering himself just a little bit further.

"No!" Gaignun's eyes flashed, cutting through Albedo's mind and sending the contaminated variant into the wall. The force of the blow knocked Albedo's concentration loose and Jr. was free. Jr. instantly pulled himself up, red electricity flickering along his body from his pent up anger. Jr. gave a loud cry and the room was torn apart by his energy. Gaignun backed out of the door as fast as he could, but his arm getting caught in the attack. Jr. calmed himself enough to lower his level, grabbing his guns from where they lie on the floor, but when he went to raise them against Albedo he was gone. Jr. straightened himself up, his head pounding. "Jr." Gaignun started. Jr. turned around to see Gaignun holding a bleeding arm at his side. "Are you ok?"

"I'm ok, but what about you?"

Gaignun sighed in relief. "Nothing Shelley couldn't fix, I'm sure." Jr. frowned and put his guns into his pockets and went to look at Gaignun's arm for himself. "It's fine Jr." Gaignun protested, moving it around to show he still had mobility of it. Gaignun bent down on one knee to examine the wound on Jr.'s neck. "Does it hurt?"

"It's fine, Gaignun, really."

"It's deep."

"I'm fine."

"Your mouth is bleeding."

"No...it's..."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm fine."

"Are you really?"

Jr. frowned and shook his head. "Right now...I think we should just...get ourselves bandaged up, ok?"

Gaignun nodded, stood and walked with Jr. to find Shelley and Mary, watching Jr. the way an overprotective mother might watch her baby and constantly alert in case Albedo might come back.

* * *

A/N: Wow, done. XD Jeez that was sort of fun to write. Another update will be up soon. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	3. Relax

A/N: Whooo! I just filled with writing adrenaline! XD Unfortunatley, this is the last chapter that I'm probably going to update at the unbelieveably ridiculous rate I have been. But with such positive feedback, I can't possibly stop this story. Now, on with the next chapter!

I do not own Xenosaga, but I wish I did. That'd be really hackin' cool. XDDD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 3  
Relax

Jr. really just wanted to be alone. He didn't even want to talk to Mary. If chaos had been there, he probably would've turned him away too. Jr. wasn't allowed back in his room because of the demolished state it was in. The walls and everything inside that part of the residential area would have to be replaced. He stared out of the window in Gaignun's room, looking at the lights of Miltia. He suddenly felt homesick for the Foundation. The way the lights reflected on the artificial beach and the always present stars of the celestial sky. He touched his neck delicatley. He hadn't realized how bad Albedo had bitten him until MOMO had offered to fix it. Poor girl. She had been terrified at the sight of it. "Jr.! What happened?!" the small girl had cried, instantly setting him down and fixing the gushing wound. "Nothing MOMO. I was just careless."

MOMO had frowned and fussed over him, even calling Ziggy to help him walk back to his room. None of it was necessary, but Ziggy was always the just in case type and MOMO wouldn't rest until she saw him safe. The poor girl. She adored him, he knew that. His every breath had her on edge. He hadn't even bothered to see her that day. Maybe Albedo was right, maybe he was cruel. Jr. liked to think that if that attack hadn't occured, he would've spent time with her. He liked MOMO. He liked spending time with her. He just had too much on his mind tonight. Albedo was back and if he didn't want MOMO and the Y-data he wanted something else. Jr. shivered and lightly touched the bandage on his neck. He wanted Jr. It worried him, but at the same time itgave him a strange peace of mind, knowing that he wouldn't try to chase after the innocent little girl anymore. He wanted a sinner. Jr. moved a little too fast when shifting in his movement, causing the gashes on his abdomen to burn. They hadn't been all that serious, but they still hurt nonetheless. Aggrivated, Jr. tore off his shirt and threw it to the floor so that nothing would rub against it.

"Jr.?" a voice from beyond the door called.

"Go ahead Gaignun. It's your room, afterall."

The door slid open and a bandaged Gaignun walked through the door. His entire right bicep was wrapped in gaze, only a burn but the sight made Jr. sick. He had done that in his loss of control, proving once again that he needed the "toys" and that he was weak. Albedo would love his victory. "How are you feeling?" Gaignun asked, worried.

Jr. shrugged, "I'm ok. I don't know how many times I'm going to have to say it."

Gaignun nodded and went to sit in his chair by his desk. "Thank you, Gaignun. I don't know what would've happened if you hadn't shown up..."

Gaignun shifted uncomfortably. He knew what would've happened. "Jr., I...I shouldn't have left you alone, but I thought maybe chaos was with you or someone else was. I didn't think..."

Jr. continued to stare out the window. "I let chaos stay in Miltia with Shion. I came home alone. Albedo's acquired some kind of new power, Gaignun. Could you feel it? The strength...it was almost terrifying."

"I'm...sorry you had to go through that."

Jr. shrugged again and pulled at his pajama pants. "Don't worry about important thing is that it's all over. Right? We'll just have to be more careful next time."

Jr. suddenly turned around and walked to Gaignun, "I didn't mean to catch you in my attempt at getting rid of Albedo."

"I'm more worried about your wounds. That gash on your neck is horrible and your stomach! I didn't see those."

Gaignun carefully ran a hand down the bandages, a stern look on his face.

_**"Are you jealous, Nigredo? Is this what you want?" **_

Gaignun shook his head. Albedo should never have treated Jr. so roughly. Even with a wounded body, Jr. was perfect in Gaignun's eyes. His lean body, slim muscles that were almost invisible until he moved; the body of eternal youth. It was strange to think of Jr. as twenty-six. He'd always been fourteen, never aging,yet his body had the muscles and scars of an adult. His very muscles proved his age. Strong under tight, soft skin. Gaignun frowned and dropped his hand. He shouldn't think of his brother that way. Jr. winced a little. "Gaignun...I didn't think Albedo's obsession was that bad." he rubbed the pain in his neck. "Ugh. I need a painkiller."

Gaignun stuck a hand in one of his pockets and pulled out a small bottle. He took a couple of pills out and handed them to Jr. "It's from MOMO. She wants to make sure you get better."

Jr. gave a strange smile that Gaignun didn't know how to interpret before downing the pills. He'd known that Jr. would have a connection to her, but it hurt to actually see it on his face. Whatever makes him happy. Gaignun thought to himself. "Are these going to make me dizzy? Where am I sleeping tonight?"

Gaignun pointed to his bed. "I don't want you sleeping alone and since chaos isn't around, you'll be staying in here with me." Gaignun was afraid Jr. would argue, but to his surprise, the twenty-six year old boy only nodded and turned his beautiful, sad blue eyes onto the big bed.

"It's green. Like you're eyes." he said, talking about the bed's color. Gaignun was a little taken back by the sudden change in topic and wasn't sure how to respond. "Where are Mary and Shelley staying?" Jr. asked, his voice sounding lost.

"We only have a thousand guest rooms, Jr. I'm sure they'll have fun picking out which one they want for the night."

Jr. shook his head, "Nah, I bet they'll miss you. I bet they'll be upset with me."

Gaignun raised an eyebrow at that. "Why would you say that?"

Jr. turned his full gaze on Gaignun, a dreamy smile on his face from the effect the medicine was having on him. "I'm taking their place tonight." Gaignun shivered at the way that made him feel and tried not to visibly squirm. If only Jr. would take their place tonight, any night for that matter. Just once...

Jr. raised his arms above his head and stretched, but stopped once he remembered the pain in his abdomen. "Jeez..." he said, sleepily, "I won't be able to live like this if I don't heal up soon."

"You'll be fine, Jr." Gaignun said, rolling his eyes. "You're a U.R.T.V."

"And you're a smartass, but I don't know how fast they heal so you're on your own."

Gaignun sighed, certain that if Jr. was feeling well enough to make smart remarks, he'd be fine by tomorrow. Jr. fought the urge to stretch again and turned his head back to the window. "Nigredo..." Gaignun jerked his head at his name. "Do you think if we were real children, if we'd grown up like humans...would Albedo be like this? What would've been different? If we'd had a mother, a real father. Parents, friends, a life. A real...normal life?"

"Jr...." Gaignun stopped. He didn't know how to respond to that or exactly what Jr. wanted to hear.

_It's my fault he's like that Gaignun. If I hadn't broken the link...then Albedo would be with us right now._

Gaignun stood up and placed his hands on Jr.'s bare shoulders. "Look, I think it's time we went to bed. I think your medicine's getting to you."

But Jr. didn't respond, thoughts heavy with guilt and grief whirled at lightening speed, Gaignun didn't try to interpret them. He just stood for a moment, letting the feelings wash over him, trying his hardest to understand why Jr. cared so much for someone so evil, so crazy, so sadisitic. Why every time Albedo attacked, Jr. felt guilt for reacting in the most natural manner._ He's my brother_! A stray thought screamed in anger. _It's my fault! Goddamnit! It's my fault! I almost went Red Dragon...Red Dragon Mode. He wants me to kill him. He wants me! He wants...what does he want!? Why is he like this? Why can't I help him? Why do we always fight? Why can't I_---Gaignun frowned. _Sleep, Jr. It's time to sleep now. _

Jr. nodded and shook Gaignun's hands off of him. "Yeah. That sounds good."

Gaignun watched the boy sluggishly walk to the bed, stumbling over invisible objects and laughing that the wall was melting and demanding to know why Gaignun couldn't see it. Gaignun wasn't exactly sure if Jr.'s sudden change was due to medicine or his influence, but he was hoping it was the latter. Jr. flopped down on the bed, running a hand through his short red hair and angrily staring at the thick blankets, commanding them to cooperate with his fingers as he awkwardly tugged to free it. After a few moments of watching a medicated Jr. tug desperatley at the blanket and shout more than a few obscenities, Gaignun peeled the blanket delicatley to make room for Jr. and helped him lie down.

"I don't need your stupid help, you stupid...stupid!"

"Of course," Gaignun said, trying and failing to hide his smirk. "I know you can do it all on your own. I'm just here to make sure that...that..."

Gaignun searched his mind for something outrageous to say, knowing that Jr. would believe anything right now and picturing how funny it would be to replay all of this for him later.

"Flying monkeys don't punch chaos in the face with a book from Santa Claus in November in the year-"

"Exactly."

Gaignun walked carefully to a button on his desk and pressed it. The lights flicked off and a few moments later, he heard the shallow breathing of his tiny love as he drifted off to sleep.

* * *

It was all well and good that Jr. was asleep and that he was in absolutley no pain whatsoever. But Gaignun never got enough sleep and tonight he was certain he wouldn't get any. Jr. was usually a restless sleeper. He constantly flipped and flopped, whispered curse words and demanded things from random people in his fits, but he slept so soundly that Gaignun was sure the silence in the room was going to kill him. It was too quiet. It was too dark. They were too close. Jr. made a soft noise and slowly turned to face Gaignun, his eyes closed tight and his brow furrowed he looked like a baby. How easy it would be to just reach over in the darkness, to place his lips over Jr.'s eternally young ones. He was so gone, so medicated he wouldn't know. One scan between their link was enough to prove that. His eys trailed along Jr's. perfect skin, traveling down to the white of his bandage. The younger man frowned and once again traced his fingers along the cover. How could he do something like this to someone so perfect? He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice how close he was leaning into "inspect" the wound once again. He didn't realize how far his hand had slid down that soft skin to the muscles of his arm. He didn't snap out of his trance until it was almost too late. The sound of his name out of Jr.'s sleep drowned voice brought him back. He panicked. He pulled away so fast that he almost hit the wall his bed was pushed against. He lay perfectly still, waiting for those blue eyes to shine the darkness and accuse him of a sin so terrible that no one would ever forgive him. But Jr. only frowned and flipped over again, mumbling something incoherent. That was it. Gaignun was absolutley certain now that he was getting no sleep. He quietly slipped out of bed and walked into an adjacent room. There was another thing he was certain about. He needed a very very cold shower.

* * *

A/N: WOW! CX I'm really on a writing spree huh? Well I hope it was only fantastic. XD The next one probably won't be up as fast, but it'll be up soon! Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	4. Surprise

A/N: Whooo! Another update, seriously? Yes. I'm sorry. ^^; you may hate me if you wish. This chapter may sound a little crazy, but hey I'm crazy. It only makes sense, right? Blah blah blah on with the chapter!

I do not own Xenosaga or it's characters, but if I was rich I'd buy the franchise. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 4  
Surprise

Eight o'clock in the morning. Eight o'clock in the freaking morning and Gaignun was still awake. This was really getting ridiculous. He leaned over onto his desk and laid his head in his palms. Would he ever get any sleep? The sound of his door opening closing made him look up.

"Master Gaignun," Shelley's smooth, elegant voiced cooed. She carried a coffee cup in one hand and a file, most likely containing paperwork, while Mary waved enthusiastically and almost skipped over to see Jr.

"Mornin' Little Master!" she yelled.

"Mary!" Shelley scolded, setting the cup on the desk.

"Sorry." She said, backing away.

"It's ok, Mary. Let's just let him sleep." Gaignun said quietly, raising the cup to his lips.

"Master Gaignun, was Albedo really here?" Shelley asked.

Gaignun nodded and rubbed his temples. "Yes. Let's just say it wasn't the most pleasant expericence either of us has ever had."

"Well at least the Little Master's getting a good sleep out of that medicine! He looks so cute, don't you think, Master Gaignun?"

Gaignun paused for a second before saying, "The only time Jr.'s cute is when he's not causing damage."

"Master Gaignun!" Mary said, slapping him playfully on his left arm. Gaignun only shrugged.

"It's the truth."

"The Little Master does get in a lot of trouble," Shelley said, a light smile in her eyes.

"Yes he does." Gaignun sighed. He looked over at the sleeping boy. He'd somehow managed to tangle himself into the sheets again. One pillow covered his face and another was on the floor. Gaignun was almost glad he'd convinced himself to sit at his desk all night. "Well girls," he started, "I guess since we've got repairs to make on the Durandal we'll take it easy today."

Mary clapped excitedly, then remembered the Little Master was asleep and instantly stopped.

"Of course." Shelley said, inclining her head slightly. "Mary, let's go."

"Do we hafta? I wanna wait til the Little Master wakes up."

"The sooner we're done, the sooner you'll be able to see the Little Master."

Mary sighed but nodded and waved goodbye to Gaignun, "Tell him to come see me if he feels up to it!"

Gaignun watched them leave the room. He really couldn't think of anything he'd rather do than just relax all day if he could. He just had so much work to do. "Where does all this paperwork even come from?" Gaignun asked himself, looking through the folder Shelley had brought with her. He opened it up and thumbed through it. It wasn't as much as usual so that was a plus. He left his coffee on his desk to get dressed and when he returned Jr. was up, rubbing his eyes with one hand and yawning. "Good morning, sleeping beauty. How late did you plan on sleeping today?"

Jr. made a face and stood up. "As late as I wanted. Did you have a problem with that your highness or were you expecting me to die in my sleep?" Gaignun watched him walk across the room to his desk. "What's in this thing?" Jr. asked, picking up the cup.

"Coffee." Gaignun answered.

Jr. nodded and drank it down. "Jr., that was mine." Gaignun said, more amused than upset.

"What's your's is mine blah blah. Some deep stuff. Gaignun, I have been through a very tramatic experience and you want to deny me a simple cup of coffee? Give me a break, man."

Gaignun just stared at him. "Fine, I'll go get you another cup. Is that what you want?"

"No. I just want an apology. And I want you to fix the mess you made last night."

Jr. looked up at him curiously, but when Gaignun pointed to the bed Jr. started to argue. "That's what we have hired help for, Gaignun! I don't want to!"

Gaignun crossed his arms and waited for Jr. to give in, which he eventualy did. With a great, dramatic sigh he threw himself back onto the bed, but he didn't move. "Jr." Gaignun said warningly.

"I'm getting to it. I'm getting to it." Jr. said, signaling him to be quiet. Knowing he couldn't waste the entire day waiting for Jr. to get busy, he sat back down and started working. "Is that what you do all day, Gaignun? Work?" Jr. said, his voice muffled by the large mattress.

"Do you avoid work all day?"

"Yes."

"Well, at least you're going to admit it."

Jr. pushed himself up. "Gaignun, do I really have to do this?"

He laughed, "No, Jr. you don't have to."

"Sweet." He jumped off the bed and ran into the adjacent room.

_Where are you going? _

_I'm going to take a shower, you perv!_

_Perv? _Gaignun sent, amusement in the message.

_Yeah! I'd tell the tabloids! The press would have a field day! The great Gaignun Kukai sexually abusing his son! _

Gaignun frowned, _Jr._

_Ok, ok. Jeez. Gaignun we need to go out and have some fun today. _

Jr. flicked on the light and stared at himself in the mirror, trying to picture what it looked like under his bandage. _You haven't left this ship for anything but buisness in a long time. Don't you think it'd be nice to have some fun for once?_ Jr. peeled back the gauze slowly at first, but ended up pulling it off in a swift motion, thinking it'd hurt less that way. _I told you it'd heal fast._ Jr. pressed his hand against the purple flesh. It was closed, but it was still bruised.

_Yeah, but it still hurts. _

Jr. poked at it and winced. "Ow, damnit."

_Don't poke it then._

_Don't tell me what to do._

Gaignun sighed and started back on his paperwork. In fact, he was almost done. He hadn't realized there was so little...or maybe he was just working faster? He wasn't sure. The idea of a night out did sound pretty good. A signature here, a signature there. Approve, approve, deny, signature, deny, approve, running water...Gaignun shook his head. Approve, deny, deny...soap. Ok, no. He put down his pen and focused as hard as he could on the words. APPROVE! DENY! SIGNATURE! Warm water..."Damn." Gaignun gave up. He couldn't stop himself from at least picturing it. He could not wait until Jr.'s room was finished. It made things a lot easier when he didn't have to be so close to him. He was determined to give his brother privacy though and forced himself to keep his thoughts in his own head and not allow them to wander down the link where Jr. was...under the heavy water...soaking wet...touching himself...

"Gaignun!"

Gaignun snapped out of it. chaos and MOMO walked in. The realian almost ran to Gaignun's desk. "Is Jr. alright?"

"He's fine, MOMO." Gaignun said, leaning back in his seat and overly grateful for their existance.

"I can't believe this." chaos said, "The one time I'm not with him and something like this happens."

"Things happen, chaos. Don't feel bad. I'm sure that Jr. isn't upset with you."

"You're hurt too?"

Gaignun looked down at his arm. He'd almost forgotten about it. "It's not a big deal. It doesn't hurt anymore."

"Can we...can we see him?"MOMO asked, shyly.

Gaignun smiled sweetly at her and nodded. "Sure MOMO, but he's taking a shower right now so you'll have to wait until he comes out, ok?"

"Ok." She mumbled, fiddling with her fingers and still looking worried.

"That medicine you gave him really worked." Gaignun said, picking it up for her to see. Her golden eyes sparkled happily.

"Really?"

"He didn't feel any pain at all."

_Jr., we have company._

Silence.

_Jr., are you not paying attention to me or is something wrong?_

More silence.

_Jr....Jr.!_

_I'm here! Can't a guy take a shower in peace?_

Gaignun sighed. "Something wrong?" chaos asked.

"No, no. I was just trying to tell Jr. that we had company so he wouldn't-"

The door slid open and Jr. came out, one towel wrapped around his waist and using another to dry his hair.

"What was so important, Gaignun?"

chaos tried to hold back his laughter. MOMO squeaked and covered her face with her hands. Jr. moved the towel away from his eyes so that he could see. His face turned red when he saw MOMO and he quickly retreated into the bathroom.

"-do that." Gaignun finished.

* * *

'Well you could've warned me a little bit better than that!" Jr. huffed.

"It's your own fault, Jr. I tried to tell you. Poor MOMO. She's going to be scarred for life."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?"

"It's supposed to mean that you should pay attention to me."

Jr. ignored him and looked for his clothes. "Did any of your clothes survive yesterday?" Gaignun asked.

"Um...I think so. A few of them, anyway."

"If they were in the closet, then they should've been fine."

Jr. didn't respond. "They were in the closet, weren't they?"

"Look, Gaignun," Jr. said, deciding to just put on his pajamas and search the room in them. "If you're so worried about my clothes you should do something about it, because I'm just fine with walking around like this everyday."

"I'm sure you are, Jr."

Gaignun closed the folder and set it aside to give to Shelley later. "Well you'd better get dressed."

Gaignun raised an eyebrow at him. "I am dressed."

Jr. looked up at him and shook his head. "We're going out tonight," he started counting on his hands, "You, Shelley, Mary, chaos, me, and maybe MOMO if Ziggy will let us."

Gaignun continued to stare at him as if to say duh, I'm already dressed.

"You always wear that suit. Is that all you have?"

"I have a certain image to keep up, Jr."

Jr. nodded and walked away, complaining down the link on his way to the demolished room. He continued to rant while he dressed and entered back into Gaignun's room, wearing another long black jacket, a navy blue shirt and black pants.

"Well, where are we going, Jr.?"

Jr. stopped in the middle of his mental rant to think about that for a moment. "I don't know..."

Jr. walked to Gaignun's desk to the "special" paperwork that he'd assigned for him. He flipped through. "What are you doing?" Gaignun asked.

"I'm looking for a invitation to something."

"An invitation?"

Jr. ignored his question and kept looking. "You know how much mail you throw out, Gaignun? How many party invitations you get that you never attend? You're sort of a stiff person, aren't you?"

"The last time we went to a party, my son got drunk and ran crying to me because the piano didn't love him."

Jr. stopped his shuffling for a brief second. "Really? Well I think you should learn to discipline your son, Gaignun Kukia."

He pulled out a small envelope. "Helmer's birthday not important enough to attend?"

Surprised that he'd missed something so important, Gaignun picked it up and examined it. "Well...alright then, I guess we can go." The younger man said, still surprised as to why he didn't discover this earlier. The whole idea did seem a bit suspicious though.

"Everything I do has you suspicious. Why are you always watching me so closely?"

Gaignun ran his eyes up and down Jr.'s small body. He stood, arms crossed with a smirk on his lips and victory in his blue eyes. He was always like that, so much confidence. His very existance commanded attention. An aura of power constantly surrounded him. It made MOMO adore him. It made Albedo crave him. It made Gaignun love him.

"So that I can make sure and document the thousands of dollars you cost us everytime you destroy something."

Jr. shrugged, "Fair enough." He took Gaignun's seat and started to work.

"You're working?" Gaignun asked, surprised.

"Yep. You always do my work. I'll give you a break just this once. I did steal your coffee afterall."

Gaignun smiled to himself and went to find Shelley and Mary.

* * *

The party was in a strange building Gaignun had never seen before. It was enough for him to agree with Jr.; he never left the ship for anything except buisness. Jr. was excited to have him out._ A real father/son day, Gaignun! Imagine that! The press will just eat it up! _Jr. had been so excited that Gaignun was actually leaving that he'd put on a suit. It was almost an exact copy of Gaignun's own, a blue tie instead of a green one hung around his neck. Jr. had grabbed it happily declaring that Helmer would get a kick out of it. They all walked in a group into the building. Mary and Shelley were on either side of him, clinging to his arms. Shelley had offered to take his injured arm, certain that in her sister's excitment she'd forget about the bandage under the suit. chaos walked beside Jr., feeling a little out of place and wondering why Jr. had asked him to come, while MOMO blushed a deep pink in her pretty white dress, clinging to Jr.'s right arm.

_Jr. where are you taking me? _

_Shut up, Gaignun! I already told you. Helmer's party!_

They entered into a large white room, descending steps that led down onto a large floor where more than a thousand guests stood. There was a look of complete surprise on everyone's face. Somewhere in the crowd, a woman squealed, "Gaignun Kukai!"

Jr. chuckled. "He's here!" another cried.

_Jr...._Gaignun sent, clearly confused.

_What?_ Jr. responded, trying to act innocent.

_What's going on?_

Jr. smiled and waved to everyone. He gently led MOMO down the first few steps.

_Well, I didn't want you to miss your own party. _

_My party? You said this was Helmer's-_

_-Gaignun, do you know how easy it is for me to trick you? If we were both staring at the same sky and I told you it suddenly turned yellow because Ziggy had decided it looked better that way, you'd believe me. _

Gaignun didn't respond, masking his confusion with a professional, practiced air as he greeted guests. _I did this for you, Gaignun. A thank you present for all the money you've wasted on me. It's time I wasted some one you._

Gaignun was speechless, even in his mind he had no idea how to respond.

_Have fun!_

* * *

A/N: Wow, this one was pretty AU, huh? XD Well GaignunxJr. was AU to begin with. The next chapter will be a lot better. Will Gaignun ever admit his love for Jr.? Maybe. XD Idk. Do you know? Let's find out. Reviews are my muse, so inspire it up, people!


	5. Maybe

A/N: --; Yes, another chapter. Why? Because it's senior skip day. Really? Yes and guess who didn't know about it and had to sign out to leave early and couldn't go back to sleep so she- with nothing else to do- wrote another chapter all morning? Me. Can you feel the anger? You should. --;

I don't own Xenosaga, its characters or a competent mind. I'd settle for Xenosaga though.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 5  
Maybe

Gaignun hated her. He hated her right now more than anyone in the entire world. It wasn't the kind of hate that would cause him to mark her forever as an enemy. It was the kind that accompanied jealousy. It was the kind that tightened the chest and choked the heart with a certain kind of anger that only arose in these kinds of circumstances. They were so perfect. She fit with him flawlessly. The way her hands were held in his, the way his arm was drapped around her waist. It was beautiful. It made him sick. Shelley noticed his carefully concealed envy and watched his eyes carefully as they made their turns when dancing. Gaignun didn't realize,too busy watching the light in Jr.'s eyes and the blush on MOMO's cheeks. Mary and chaos danced a few feet away. Mary's hyper and happy voice could be heard almost clearly over the music. "Master Gaignun," Shelley said softly.

Gaignun's eyes focused on her, his mind still distracted. "Yes, Shelley?"

"Master Gaignun...I've been meaning to ask you something." But Gaignun's attention was back on Jr. and the small girl that fit so perfectly in his arms. Shelley was sure now of what she had been thinking for a long time. She paused for a moment, trying to gague his reaction when she finally said, "It's about the Little Master."

She was glad at the sudden attention she gained from that statement. "What did he do this time?"

"It's nothing like that, Master Gaignun," she paused, wanting to choose her words carefully. Gaignun wasn't the kind of person who was easily subject to anger, but if he became upset or uncomfortable with what she was saying, she knew he would shut down and she'd never be able to help him. "The Little Master has been very well behaved lately. But Master, I've been noticing a direct change in your view of the Little Master."

"Is that so?" Gaignun asked, giving her his complete and undivided attention. His voice was smooth, calm, and seductive; the way he talked to her when he wanted to get her mind off of something. Usually, this worked very well but Shelley was ready for this and she was determined to get the answer she wanted. "Yes, Master Gaignun." Shelley responded, raising her arms around his neck and pressing her body against his to counteract the power of his voice. "I believe that the Foundation Director's affections have changed dramatically toward the Little Master. He has been very preoccupied with him."

"I've just been worried about him. Albedo could come at any moment. He's gotten very good at sneaking up on us."

"Yes, Albedo is very dangerous. However, Master Gaignun, the look that the Director has been giving our small master has been leading me to believe that something else is happening."

Gaignun kept his features frozen, words swimming through his mind.

"Would the Master..." Shelley whispered into his ear, "like to tell me what's been on his mind?"

The music stopped and Gaignun released his hold around Shelley's waist.

"Thank you." Gaignun said, bowing a bit to her, always the gentleman, "for your company."

He walked to a balcony on the other side of the room, stopping to talk to a few squealing guests and talk pleasantly with some other esteemed ones.

"What happened?" Mary asked. Shelley looked over to see Mary and chaos walking up beside her. She shook her head. "Nothing, Mary. I think he just wants to be alone for a moment."

"chaos," Shelley started, an elegant smile on her pretty lips, "Would you like to dance with me?"

chaos looked from Mary to Shelley and nodded, "Of course, but what about Mary?"

Mary giggled and patted him on the shoulder. "I've got plenty of other people interested. I won't be lonley at all. You're awful sweet for thinkin' of me though." she winked at him.

"You watch Shelley now," she added, "That girl's super smart. She might confuse you with all her crazy genius."

"Yes." Shelley said, smiling, "Just the way she surely confounded you with her stupidity."

Mary stuck out her tongue before leaving to find someone to dance with. The music started up again and chaos offered his hand to Shelley, who took it gently and placed the other onto his right shoulder. "Excuse me if this seems rude," chaos spoke softly, "but I don't think that this is a spur of the moment offer. Is there something you'd like to tell me?"

Shelley nodded, "You're very observant."

chaos shrugged. "I'm guessing by the way Gaignun suddenly disappeared, it's about him?"

Shelley bit her bottom lip "You're very very observant."

She fell into the dance, allowing chaos to lead her through the steps with his graceful movements as he waited patiently for her to talk to him. "I was wondering exactly why I was asked to come here." he said, talking pleasantly to make her more comfortable. "At first, I thought that it might be to keep Jr. company, but I see that MOMO has been doing that very well." chaos inclined his head in the direction where the two were dancing. MOMO's tinkling laughter and Jr.'s voice were audible from the distance. "Then I figured it out. It must be to keep Jr. on his best behavior. I was here the time he fell in love with the piano. That wasn't a pretty sight. You were there too, weren't you Shelley? The things that boy does when he's drunk-"

"chaos, I believe that Master Gaignun might be in love with the Little Master."

chaos smiled at the interruption, glad that she finally said what was bothering her. He spun her around in slow circles, pulling her closer to him. "You've realized this too?"

She nodded, "chaos, I love Master Gaignun. It may seem strange that both my sister and I can love a person so much at the same time, but we do. I've noticed..." her hands tightened on chaos and she averted her eyes, "I've noticed the way he looks at the Little Master. The look in his eyes when he speaks about the Little Master. The careful words he uses when describing the Little Master...He never sleeps anymore, chaos. He stays awake, I believe, to keep himself from dreaming of the Little Master. I...I want him to be happy, chaos." Shelley looked up at him, to see how the information was affecting him. chaos had a small smile on his face, and a look of compassion and sympathy in his perfect translucent eyes. "You would like me to help you."

Shelley nodded. "How can I help you, Shelley?"

"You're kindness is boundless, chaos." She said, smiling.

"Honestly, I think that Jr. might feel the same way. Jr.'s not exactly the most romantic person, but I'm sure that if he was pushed in that direction, he'd easily fall in love with Gaignun."

"My thoughts exactly." Shelley beamed. She stopped in the middle of her dance and gave him a hug. A gesture very unlike her. "Well," he said, his laughter like music in her ears. "Let's get started."

* * *

"Jr." chaos said, stumbling upon the dancers.

"chaos!" he said, waving. "Look MOMO. chaos has come to spend time with us."

"Hi chaos!" she said, smiling.

"MOMO, you look lovely, have I told you that?"

MOMO blushed and covered her mouth. "Listen to him, trying to sweet talk you, MOMO."

"Actually, I do need to borrow Jr. for a few moments, if you don't mind."

MOMO shook her head. "No, it's fine. I'm kind of thirsty anyway. I'll go get something to drink. You want something Jr.?" Jr. started to answer, but chaos covered his mouth with a gloved hand.

"He's fine, MOMO. You go on ahead." MOMO giggled and left.

"So, what do you want, chaos? Besides preventing me from drinking. I love to drink and I loved that piano! She said that we were going to be together forever."

chaos sweatdropped and flicked Jr. on the forehead. "Ow! What was that for?"

"To make you stop talking."

Jr. frowned and folded his arms across his chest. "If I'd had pockets and I'd brought my Makarov's with me I'd shoot holes in your face."

"Well then I guess I should consider myself very fortunate."

"Yes, you should. Now what do you want?"

chaos pulled Jr. away from the dance floor and pulled him to a small table next to a large window.

"Jr." chaos asked after the boy sat down.

"I need to ask you something. How serious are you about MOMO?"

Jr. looked down at the table. "She's not Sakura."

"No," chaos said, his eyes ever sympathetic.

"She's...not Sakura. She's a completley different person. It's not that I don't adore her or think that she's cute. She's perfect...I just don't feel anything. She loves me, though chaos. Who am I to take something like that away from her?"

chaos tilted his head to one side the way a confused puppy might when he's heard a strange noise. "You can't force yourself to feel something you don't, Jr."

"I'm twenty-six, chaos. I'm twenty-fucking-six and I'm trapped in this body though. If I tried to have a relationship with a person my age, they'd get into trouble. If I try to date someone my own outward age, I'll feel like a pedophile. MOMO won't age. She'll stay the way she is forever, just like me. If I can just get that feeling to come, it'll be perfect."

"Jr., I need to make a confession."

Jr. looked up at him."Like what? You fall in love with MOMO?"

chaos smiled and shook his head at such an outrageous suggestion. "Look, chaos, buddy. I love you and everything and I know I'm drop-dead sexy, but I just don't think it'll work out."

chaos smacked himself on the forehead. "Jr. I don't want you or your 'drop-dead sexy' body, ok?"

Jr. nodded, a huge grin on his face. "Continue."

"Jr., I think that Gaignun is in love with you."

* * *

"Forgive me, Master Gaignun." Shelley said, bowing. "It was rude of me to interrogate you so."

Gaignun nodded, as a way of acceptance. He had a lot of things on his mind. The party had been fun, a great way to relax until Shelley...He opened the door to his bedroom. Jr. hadn't talked to him all the way home, which was very strange. Not even so much as a mental remark, his entire mind closed. Gaignun pulled his tie loose and threw it onto the floor, his suit jacket and shirt followed it. He'd asked Shelley and Mary to let him sleep alone tonight. chaos was staying with Jr. so Gaignun was alone. He unbuckled his belt and dropped it on the floor, making a soft thud as it hit. He couldn't think of a time he'd ever slept alone. He stretched his tired muscles. Even when he was younger and living at the institute, he'd shared a room with Jr. and Albedo. After their rescue they were kept together and once they saved Mary and Shelley from the pharmaucitcal testing he'd always had them. He pulled off his sneakers. Jr. had always thought that it was funny for Gaignun to wear sneakers with his suits. "It only proves that you've got a least a little bit of humor in there somewhere."

He smiled to himself and pulled off his pants. He'd thrown all his clothes in the floor, if only Jr. was here to see it. He shook his head. Why couldn't he stop thinking about Jr.? Just for a few moments? He didn't bother to put on pajamas. One night with Jr. and he was turning into him. What was wrong with him? He sat down on the side of the bed a maid had fixed up for him. Jr. had slept here last night. Last night had been his chance. It had been Gaignun's only chance and he'd ruined it. An opprotunity that might not come again. He sighed, defeated and mentally exhausted. He pulled the blanket back and made himself comfortable. He didn't sleep though. Gaignun never slept, not anymore. He stared up at the dark canopy, completely alone. He wasn't sure how late it was, but he was certain that it was too late for any normal person to be up. He was contemplating medicine to make him sleep when the door to his room opened and closed. It happened so fast that Gaignun didn't have the time to even sit up. "Who's there?" he demanded to the surrounding darkness. He was answered only by soft footsteps and a loud, "Shit!" when the steps tripped.

"Jr.?"

No answer. "Jr. I know that's you. What's wrong?"

His room was too dark to see anything, to even make out the shape of the intruder, but the sound of that obsenity had him almost certain it was Jr. Why wouldn't he answer? "Jr., if there's something wrong-" He was interrupted when a small body jumped on his legs.

"Jr.?" Still, he didn't answer. Only the sound of his breathing was audible. Gaignun frowned and tried to open a link only to be deflected. "Jr., what the hell?"

Gaignun was about to get up when he felt a hand against his chest. "Jr..."

The weight behind the hand shifted as the body moved closer. He could feel the breathing now, warm and hot on his skin. "Jr., please tell me wh-" Gaignun was interrupted as a pair of lips met his in a timid kiss. The breathing was nervous now as it met Gaignun's a second time, harder. Gaignun couldn't believe it, he didn't understand what was going on. The hand on his chest moved up along his neck and found it's way into his hair. Gaignun remained perfectly frozen, almost afraid to move. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be Jr. Jr. didn't want his brother, not like this. But when the lips pulled away from Gaignun's, and when the voice spoke his name so perfectly in the pitch he'd thought he'd never get the privilage of hearing his entire life, he knew because he'd dreamed of it so many nights before. When he used to sleep...

"Jr."

* * *

A/N: There it's done. Well at least something good came out of all of this, right? Right?...*silence* --; No one cares, huh? You know the drill, reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. C:


	6. If You Say So

A/N: HAH! XD Thought you were all free of my updating frenzy! *foghorn* Wrong! XDDD

I just can't stop working on this apparently. So here it is. The next chapter yay!

Warning: This does actually contain sex! Wow, XD An M-rated yaoi, with actual sex? Yes. Yes it is. XD

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and that's why I'm dead inside. CX

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 6  
If You Say So

"You think what!?" Jr. screamed. chaos hadn't been sure of exactly how Jr. was going to react to the news. He had guessed it would be something like this, but not with so much anger behind it. "Jr...calm down." chaos said, raising his hands palm-up in defense. He was just waiting for Jr. to spring across the table and attack him, but Jr. only stared in shock. There was a deep frown on his lips and confusion in his eyes, as if he were concentrating hard on something.

"Jr.," chaos said, calmly. "He won't open his mind to you. He's probably hidden it very well. You've never looked for any information like that before, have you?"

Jr. didn't answer, just stared at the table. "It's not true." he said finally. He raised his eyes to chaos'. "I know Gaignun better than anyone. I know that's not true, I would've...If he'd felt that way about me I would know. We don't..have any secrets. We never have."

"Jr., why would I lie about something like this?" chaos asked, suddenly serious.

"chaos...It's just...it's just wrong." Jr. responded. "I know Gaignun! I know him! I would know something like this!"

"Jr., it's true. You know Gaignun, and you know how good he is about concealing himself when he doesn't want someone to know something."

"Not from me." Jr. said, turning confusion to anger, "Never from me."

chaos leaned forward, "Why does this bother you so much, Jr.?" Jr. shifted a little bit.

"Is it because you think it's disgusting or because you didn't know about it?"

Jr. didn't answer. chaos opened his mouth to continue but MOMO was coming and since he already knew the answer he wouldn't press it in front of her.

Jr., being just like his brother, was able to mask his emotions in front of MOMO the way a camellion meshes to hide its true colors. His smile was brillant, his blue eyes sparkled and he immersed himself in the distraction that was MOMO. Grateful for any attention that Jr. would be willing to give, she didn't realize how upset he truly was. chaos kept a careful eye on him and Shelley kept a careful eye on Gaignun until the end of the party. On the way back to the Durandal there was a quiet tension that clung to the air. Jr. and Gaignun didn't speak to each other. chaos didn't need a mental link to see that the two were stuck in their own thoughts. Gaignun kept his conversation with Mary and Shelley while Jr. stayed with chaos and MOMO, neither one acknowledging the other's presence. When they'd reached the Durandal, Shelley pulled chaos away from everyone. "I will apologize to Master Gaignun now. I need you to try and convince Jr. that he needs to give the Master a chance. Can you do that for me, chaos?"

chaos smiled beautifully at her, "I'm way ahead of you, Shelley." Everyone bid each other goodnight and went their separate ways. After MOMO was gone, chaos and Jr. headed to an empty guest room chaos had chosen to stay in. "It's better than sleeping on the Elsa, huh? That place is a piece of junk."

chaos shook his head, "I like the Elsa. It's the only home I've ever known."

Jr. made a noise like that was the most absurd thing he'd ever heard in his entire life and started getting ready to sleep. He stripped down to his boxers and borrowed a tank top from chaos. He made a great show of being tired, dramatically stretching his arms and constantly telling the younger boy how exhausted he was. chaos wasn't buying it though, he knew Jr. better than that and when Jr. turned off the lights and snuggled himself under the blanket, chaos knew he wasn't asleep. "Jr.?" chaos asked, his voice empty in the darkness.

"Yeah?"

"About Gaignun..."

"chaos..."

"Maybe you should just talk to him."

"I'm afraid." Jr. answered, tensing up.

"Of what?"

"I'm afraid...that it might be true..."

chaos was silent, letting the sentence sink in. He didn't understand what Jr. meant. Afraid that he might not know his brother as well as he thought? Afraid that he might not feel the same way? Or was it just the opposite? "There's only one way to find out." chaos prompted. Jr. didn't answer. The silence went on for hours, chaos wasn't sure how long. His every heartbeat sounded like a powerful drum in his ears as he counted the seconds, waiting to see what Jr. would do. When he was certain that Jr. was asleep and wasn't going to get up, the variant surprised him. A russel of blankets, a few soft footsteps, an open door, and Jr. was gone.

* * *

Gaignun couldn't remember. He couldn't remember anything, couldn't think past this moment. Jr.'s lips pressed against his with a need, an urge that made his whole body tingle. Gaignun fought desperatley against his weakness, trying to remember if he'd taken the pills and if he was dreaming. It was so dark, it was so surreal, it was impossible! Jr.'s hands worked nervously and unsteadily, as his lips tried in earnest to get some sort of response out of the frozen man underneath him. Gaignun tried to open a small link, but Jr. wasn't letting him in, not that he could put up much of a fight when Jr.'s soft mouth was covering his own. While Jr. had always been good about hiding his thoughts, his emotions were easy for Gaignun to feel out. He searched frantically, eager to find anything he could to prove to him this was real. "Gaignun?" he whispered, pulling away. Uncertainty. Jr. was pulling away from him, afraid that he'd been making a mistake. He couldn't pass up this chance, not again. Dream or not, he was going to make it last.

Gaignun reached out into the darkness, his hand landing on Jr.'s right shoulder. He felt Jr.'s muscles tense under the physical contact. Gaignun marveled at the feeling of being so close to Jr. He slowly ran his hand from his shoulder to the smooth skin on his neck. Then carefully, as not to scare him, Gaignun gripped the back of his neck and pulled him forward for another kiss. Gaignun was having a hard time staying composed. He felt like he was melting. Jr.'s lips moved slowly and awkwardly against his. He smirked to himself and pulled him harder, trying not to press against the wound on his neck. He moved his lips from Jr.'s mouth to his neck, swiftly making contact and getting a stiff noise from Jr. in response. Gaignun moved himself into a sitting position and pulled Jr.'s body against his, making his way down the boy's shoulder. Surprised at the sudden close contact, Jr. tightened his hold around Gaignun's neck and remained tense. _Jr., please don't stop me. _Gaignun prayed silently as he rand his hands along the smooth contours of Jr.'s back. _Please..._

Gaignun was afraid to press Jr. onto his back, thinking it might startle him and make him wake up, or worse make Gaignun realize this was all a dream. So instead, he moved faster and bit down on a small place at the base of the older boy's throat. Jr. tried to hide the moan that squeaked out of his lips, but it didn't work. Gaignun bit him again, softly just to hear the sound of his voice. Jr. could feel the heat rising in his face and speeding of his heart. He tried to calm himself down, but Gaignun was skilled in this area where Jr. wasn't and even the most simple movement he made had Jr.'s head spinning. He hadn't come here for this, but Gaignun was convincing him to stay for it. Gaignun captured his mouth again, coaxing Jr.'s body to lessen its tense muscles. Jr. was so dizzy that he didn't protest as Gaignun expertly slid his tongue into his mouth. Gaignun, pleased at the way Jr.'s body was responding to him, pulled off Jr.'s tan top and threw it into the surrounding darkness. Jr. gasped and opened his mouth, probably to complain, but Gaignun didn't give him enough time for that, crashing into him again and running his hands once up his spine. Jr. shivered hard and arched into the touch.

Gaignun couldn't take it anymore and he gently laid Jr. onto his back, running his mouth over Jr.'s chest. Exploring his newly claimed territory. He was waiting for Jr. to stop him. He'd already gotten more than he'd ever thought he'd get in his entire life. Even in his dreams, Gaignun hadn't gotten this far. Jr. didn't protest, only responding to Gaignun's touch with soft moans and tugs on his short black hair. Gaignun slowly ran his tongue over one of Jr.'s nipples, making him cry and arch again into him. Jr.'s erection brushed against Gaignun's making his head spin. Jr. cried out and moved his hips upwards again, desperate for more. Gaignun gritted his teeth. He hadn't decided if he was actually going to do what he was thinking about, but Jr. was practically begging for it.

Gaignun slid an arm around Jr.'s waist and pressed down on him, hard. Jr. gasped, his muscles tensing again around Gaignun's neck. Gaignun was tired of playing it safe. He was going get what he wanted tonight. With a growl, he pulled away and reached under the bed for the lube he'd kept hidden for Mary and Shelley. He came back to Jr., pulling off his boxers and attacking his mouth again, trying to distract him. Gaignun had never been with another man before. He was admittedly, a little nervous, thinking that Jr. would never forgive him if he didn't like it. At least he could tease him about it later if he did, right? Gaignun pulled off his own boxers and pressed down on Jr. again. "Gaignun!" he screamed. Gaignun thought he'd lose his mind.

"Again, Jr. please!" he begged. He slicked some of the slippery substance on his fingers and hesitantly slid one into Jr.'s intrance. Jr. hissed, almost angrily, at the intrusion. Gaignun tried to keep himself calm. He just had to get past the pain part and it would be fine, but this was something he couldn't rush if he wanted to make Jr. feel good he'd have to be gentle. Gaignun painstakingly placed one finger after another, trying to stretch him and keep his mind off the pain any way he could. Finally Jr. cried out as Gaignun's finger brushed against his prostate. Eager to hear the pleasant sound again, Gaignun aimed for the same spot, marveling at the noises his brother was making.

He couldn't take it anymore. He pulled his fingers out, noticing with a smirk the unhappy noise that Jr. was still trying to hide. He quickly slicked himself up and postitioned himself at Jr.'s entrance. He had to calm himself down for a moment. He had to do this right. Afraid that if he sat too long without doing anything that Jr. would leave, he slowly pushed himself in. His body shook from the way Jr.'s body gripped him, it was almost too much to bear, but Jr.'s whimpered brought him back. He'd had a plan though, knowing it'd be uncomfortable for Jr. He wrapped his hand around Jr.'s erection. Jr. moaned and squirmed. Gaignun remained still, pumping Jr. while his body adjusted to him. After a only a few moments, the feel of Jr.'s squirming beneath him was too much and he slowly started moving. Jr.'s movement increased, wrapping his arms around Gaignun's neck and his legs around his back. "Ah..ah! Gaig...nun!"

Gaignun moved faster, pumping Jr. in time with his thrusts. He had never felt anything so good in his entire life. How long had he wanted this? Something that was so forbidden, so out of reach that he couldn't even reach it in his dreams? Jr. was getting close, Gaignun could feel it. He moved faster, thrusting harder, drowning himself in the perfection that was Jr. "Ha-Ah! Gaignun!" Jr.'s body shook with the beginning spasms of orgasm. Gaignun, in his smooth, seductive voice leaned down to Jr.

"Come for me Jr., " he whispered, biting on his ear. "Come for me."

A loud scream erupted from the boy as he came, his whole body shaking. Gaignun released his hold on Jr. and grabbed his hips. He gave a few quick thrusts before he too, came. His body racked with continuous spasms and turned his vision a brilliant white. When his vision came back, he was surrounded again by the darkness, lying on top of his brother. The sound of thier tired breathing was music in the black room. Gaignun pulled out of Jr., hearing the uncomfortable groan he gave. Gaignun lie on his back, staring at the darkness, much like he did every other night. This night was different though. He turned his head in the direction Jr. lie. He didn't know what to say to him. He wasn't even sure if this was reality. Jr. didn't make a sound, hadn't really said anything or explained to him why he had come in the first place, but right now, Gaignun didn't care. He didn't care at all. He reached over into the pitch black void, his hand landing on a warm stomach. Then, Gaignun said something. Something he would never have said aloud to anyone, but he was almost absolutley certain this was a dream, so what the hell did it matter? "Jr. I love you."

There was no response, but again Gaignun didn't care. He was too happy. As he felt the rise and fall of Jr.'s body with the intake and outtake of air, he was certain this was paradise. Surprisingly, Gaignun felt his eyes getting heavy. That was something he hadn't felt in a while. He felt along the giant bed for the warm body he'd been so close to only moments before. He cradled Jr. delicatley, wrapping him close in his arms and listening to the rythmic beating of his heart. The feeling was incredible, just holding him like this. He lie quietly, feeling the thickness of sleep finally overtake him when he heard a soft, tired voice whisper from the darkness, "If you say so."

Gaignun only smiled to himself as he finally drifted off to sleep.

* * *

A/N: Wow. *^^* I totally just wrote that. Eh, I'm new to the whole yaoi sex thing, so this probably wasn't all that great. But I am proud of the fact that I could actually get through one! :D

Praise be to me! Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! C:


	7. Really?

A/N: Helloooo! Guess who this is. XDD This is getting kind of ridiculous now, huh? I mean seriously, what's happening? Who updates like this? Oh well, this story pwns my soul obviously, so here you go. CX

Oh, and I would like to thank The Original Oxymoron. Your reviews make me happy. CX

Ganon XD and Albedo's Jerusalem: I am no longer a tease!

Tuluha- Is anybody asking for your opinion? (Yeah, I spelled it wrong on purpose. I didn't care enough to check and make sure I spelled it right.) XDD

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters, but as you can see they obviously wanted Jr. and Gaignun to be together. America just wasn't having it. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 7  
Really?

Rubedo carried Nigredo in his arms. The rain was pounding on them so hard that it was difficult to tell where the rain began and his tears started. Nigredo didn't know why Rubedo was bothering. It didn't matter, no one was there to help them. Rubedo struggled with the weight in his tired arms. Nigredo was so tired, he was so so tired. "Don't think like that, Nigredo!" Rubedo despaired. Nigredo was in so much pain that it was almost numbing. He could barely breathe. Blood poured out of his wounds like water from a fountain. Rubedo should drop him. He should drop him and run. He might be able to catch someone. If he'd just run. "Nigredo, stop that." he cried. Tears streaked down his face and broke his voice. Nigredo was useless right now, only adding weight to the small U.R.T.V. "It's ok," Rubedo sobbed. "It's all over. Everything..."

Nigredo was fading in and out of conciousness now as Rubedo struggled to carry him. Rubedo walked the empty halls of Labyrinthos in vain, no one was there. No one alive. But Rubedo searched anyway, going back to the place where U-DO had surfaced. The place where he'd destroyed his brothers. Rain poured through the broken building, landing with the force of paintballs into Nigredo's numerous bullet wounds. Rubedo had been walking for miles, trying to get them as far away from Albedo as possible. Rubedo said, "Why did you come looking for me? Why?"

"He...was coming for you...Rubedo. Albedo..."

Rubedo tried as hard as he could to make it back. Someone would be there. They just had to be. He walked down the final steps and made his way into the opening. "Somebody!" he yelled into the empty room. "Anybody! Please help us!" He struggled forward, his legs growing weak. He made it only a few more steps before he fell to his knees. Rubedo turned his eyes to the sky, pleading with the darkness. "It won't stop." he choked. "Nigredo...won't stop bleeding!"

"It's ok, Rubedo." Nigredo's voice spoke softly, filled with pain. "Let it...go."

"Don't say that!" Rubedo cried, "You can't give up!" Rubedo pulled on his link, trying to keep his conciousness alive. _Don't do this, Nigredo. Don't do this!_

_I'm so tired, Rubedo._ Tears streamed down the boy's face, his body shaking from his sobs. He was going to lose his brother and there was nothing he could do. Why was he so weak!? So helpless!? Nigredo held on lightly, trying to be reassuring in all of his fading. Just to hold on to Rubedo, make him feel a little better. All of Rubedo's hope was gone, all he could do was hold onto Nigredo's body. That's all he would have left. Suddenly, a light shone on the two of them.. Rubedo looked up. _Nigredo, someone's here! We're going to be ok. Please...Just hold on. _

The broken E.S. landed and their saviors jumped down. Canaan walked over to them, effortlessly lifting Nigredo's broken body into saftey. _Nigredo! You'll be ok. You're going to be ok, now. _But Nigredo didn't answer._ Nigredo, I'm so sorry, please answer me. _When he didn't get an answer, Rubedo almost lost it. "It...it's all my fault." he whimpered. chaos lifted him onto his back and Jr. leaned his head against chaos' shoulder. "I'm the leader, but then I cut the link" he continued, staring at Nigredo. A few more tears fell down his cheeks, "And now Albedo's..."

"Albedo?" Canaan asked.

"He's...a piece of me. The beating, in my right chest." Rubedo's strength gave out, and he fainted against chaos' shoulder.

_I'm sorry, Nigredo..._

* * *

The dream faded away. Such a strange memory. He wondered why he was dreaming about that day. He didn't want to wake up yet. He was so comfortable, when had he ever felt this comfortable!? He hated his mind, wondering how such a wonderful dream of Jr. could turn into something like that. Gaignun, finally deciding that he couldn't stay in bed all day, stretched his empty arms. Well, maybe I could just get up a little bit later...he reasoned, flipping over onto his other side and trying to catch up on weeks of missed sleep. A strange noise disturbed them, though. A familar whirl and click. Whirl and click. Curious, he finally opened his eyes to find Jr. sitting at the opposite end, or the head of his bed since he'd fallen asleep at the wrong end. "Jr.?" Gaignun asked, surprised. Jr. didn't say anything. In his right hand was a Makarov. He silently twirled the trigger and around his fingers, stopping it from time to time, as if in deep thought. Gaignun, confused at how he'd gotten so twisted around, sat up. His eyes grew wide in realization when he noticed the feeling of the blanket against his completley bare legs and waist. It was real! It had really happened! He shook his head. He had thoroughly believed that last night had been one big dream, something he'd cherish forever and keep hidden from everyone, especially Jr. Gaignun was at a loss for words, completley unsure of what to say next. Jr. just sat in the clothes he'd worn there last night, twirling the gun. The silence was terrifying. He was certain he'd never been this afraid in his entire life. Whirl, click, whirl, click, whirl, click, whirl, click. "Gaignun."

"Jr.?"

"Last night." he said, disbelief in his voice. "I didn't come for that." Gaignun grappled with the unusual feeling of not having anything to say, but he didn't have time to think of something. Jr. leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

"Gaignun, I know you always wanted to be a part of the thing Albedo and I shared. I know that you still do. But you don't understand that to us, you were something different. You were the peacemaker, the reason in chaos, and -more for me than Albedo- the only person I could actually run to when something went wrong. Albedo always ran to me. He always needed me to be strong for him. You were strong on your own, Gaignun. You've never needed anyone and I've always admired you for that, maybe it was more than admiration."

He sighed heavily and twirled the gun around again, choosing his next words as carefully as possible. "I'm not saying that I love you, not the way you love me. I think you'd like me to tell you the truth before a lie. That's how you've always been. I'm trying to say that..." Jr. shook his head angrily and shrugged. "Hell, I really don't know what to say."

"Jr...I'm sorry." Gaignun said, suddenly regretting the wonderful night he'd had. "I shouldn't have done that."

"Well I wasn't exactly calling it rape, now was I?"

"Hm?"

Jr. paused and ran a hand through his hair and flopped onto his back. "I'm saying that...Ugh! Someone told me that you were in love with me. I didn't believe it because,well, we know everything about each other. It bothered me. It really bothered me. Why didn't you tell me, Gaignun? Were you ashamed? Eh, I guess it really doesn't matter anymore. I came here to prove it."

"Why didn't you just ask me," Gaignun asked.

Jr. shrugged, "I thought you'd lie to me. I thought that since you'd been able to keep it such a good secret that you'd just say no. I wanted to know the truth, so..." Jr. blushed and turned his face away from Gaignun, "I didn't think that would happen, though."

"I don't know what came over me." Gaignun admitted, "I'm sorry, it was a mistake."

"But...I don't think it was." Jr. said. Gaignun's heart fluttered at those words.

"What do you mean, Jr.?" he said, his voice always calm.

"I don't love MOMO, Gaignun. I'm not even sure I know what love is." Jr. sat up again and crawled over to Gaignun. He stopped beside him and grabbed one of his hands. "Can you feel this?" he asked, placing it against his chest.

"Um...yes?" Gaignun said. Jr. rolled his eyes. "Ok, I mean of course. But I don't under-"

"This is where my heart is, but that's not what I want you to feel, so I'm going to put your hand here instead." Gaignun couldn't help but smile at that comment as Jr. lowered his hand to cover his rib cage. "Right here," he said, "Is a ball of constant anger and no matter what I do it is always there. I could be the happiest person in the world, but I woud still feel it." He shrugged at the sympathetic look on Gaignun's face, "I don't really mind it. It's probably just because of my Red Dragon power. The point is...I don't know why but, when you're around, when I do anything with you it goes away. I can't feel it anymore. I don't think that there's ever been a time I've truly been angry with you."

Gaignun's heart warmed at the idea. "You...keep me calm. I'm never afraid of losing control when you're here...and I think that...that means something..."

"That...you belong to me?" Gaignun asked, reading the thoughts in Jr.'s mind.

Jr. smiled and shook his head, "No actually that you belong to me, but you can say it any way you want, Gaignun if it'll make you happy. I'll know the truth."

Gaignun laughed nervously, "Is this really happening or am I in a coma where the dreams I've been holding back have come to taunt me mercilessly?"

"Trust me, if you were in a coma, I would be screaming at you to wake up."

"Obscenities, I'm sure."

"You know me too well," Jr. said, smiling.

"Yes," Gaignun said, leaning in closer to Jr. to place his lips against his. "I do."

* * *

chaos couldn't help smiling as he saw Jr. later that day. Gaignun and Jr. had stayed locked away most of it and this was the first anyone had seen either of them. "How was it?" the seraph in disguise asked.

"How was what?" Jr. said.

chaos shrugged, "You weren't in the room this morning."

"Really? I think it was you who wasn't in the room with me. Hah! Try that one on for size."

chaos shook his head, "The things you say, Jr."

"The things you don't."

"Are you trying to start a fight with me?"

"Is it working?"

"You know it's not."

"It was worth a shot."

chaos sighed, "Well...have you told MOMO?"

Jr. frowned, "I told you, chaos. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes you do, don't pretend. I want to know. You've broken someone's heart or you're going to and I want to know which person to comfort after the devastating blow. I'm sure it would crush someone's world to be deprived of...what did you call it? Your "drop-dead sexy" body?"

Jr. thought about this for a moment, then nodded. "Sure it would."

"Was Gaignun happy?"

Jr. smiled, "Yeah, he was."

"Then you love him?"

Jr.'s smile faded a bit. "I'm sort of confused about that part. I told him what I could. He was still happy."

chaos understood and didn't say anything more, walking with Jr. to the Durandal's bridge. "I...he fell asleep last night."

chaos turned his attention back to Jr. "He never sleeps." Jr. explained. "He hasn't slept in at least a year, I think. He's always so tired, but last night he slept. He dreamt about us. It was a strange dream. The night you found us. During the Miltian Conflict. I wonder why he would dream about something like that..." They walked from the residentail building to the transport that would take them to the bridge. It didn't take long before the movement stopped and they'd reached thier destination.

"Did you send it to him?" chaos asked, amused by Jr.'s charade.

"Maybe...maybe not. If I did, I don't think he's figured it out yet."

"And when he does?" chaos asked as they reached the elevator.

"Then I don't know." he shrugged. "All I know is that it's time to break a little girl's heart."

Jr. frowned, "I'm not looking forward to this at all. chaos, can you stop by later today after you've done whatever Matthews needs? I have a feeling MOMO will need a lot more support than from just the old man and Dr. Mizrahi. That lady's really cold."

"Sure Jr., but before we go our separate ways I think I should tell you something."

chaos eyes held a sort of graveness that Jr. couldn't ignore and so he stopped his walking and nodded. "When you're walking around after a night with Gaignun, try not to make it so obvious that you two have um...been together."

"What?!"

"I know it was probably your first time, but you shouldn't walk that way unless you want to start a rumor that you're gay." chaos winked at him and laughed, walking quickly to the transport and waving as the machine helped him escape. Jr. sighed. MOMO would be waiting for him up ahead. This was not going to be a good day. He pressed the button to the elevator and stood before its opening doors. He started to walk in, then remembered what chaos had said and straightened himself up. "Stupid, chaos." he muttered to himself as the doors closed. "He's always right."

* * *

A/N: WOOOO! Done. C: Ok, seriously guys I'm going to try to cut back on the updating. It's just unhealthy. Who updates like this? XD The story is practically writing itself here and I still have AP homework. No! D: Essay of dooooom! *runs away* Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. C:


	8. Smooth Criminal

A/N: WOOOOW! Another chapter and I am tired. Geez. XD I hope prom this Friday knocks me out of this whole update everyday routine. I'm afraid I'm losing my touch! But with such a demanding story, what am I supposed to do? XDDD Anyways, here it is:

I do not own Xenosaga or it's characters, but no one could own Jr. anyway. He would shoot holes in our faces. CX

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 8  
Smooth Criminal

Albedo laughed viciously at the weak Realian in his arms. "Not even worth the atoms spent to create your form. Pale in comparrison to even the lesser Kirchwasser. An existance completely useless and fraud. An immitation cheaply made and gaudy before the realm of humans." He wrapped his sharp fingers around her throat and lifted her up to his eye level. "Synthetic of a synthetic! Immitation of an immitation! A puppet carved from rotten wood! Decaying flower! Sans Valuer!" A quick, jerking motion of his wrist ended her breath. He threw her limp body to the ground and gripped another 100-series, pulling her by her green uniform. She didn't squeal or fight. She didn't cry out for the help of her fellow Realians. She was afraid, they were all too afraid. Albedo liked the fear. The Kirschwassers had held nothing but devotion. Albedo never got any emotion out of them and that's why these copies were much more pathetic. He ripped her left arm from its socket and smiled sadistically at the scream that erupted from her. He thrust his hand into her chest, destroying her protection and crushing her artificial heart. A wicked gleam sparkled in his eyes as the Realian shut down permanently. "Does this please you, Rubedo?" There was a thud as the sound of his madness echoed off the walls.

* * *

"But Jr..."

Oh no, she was going to cry. He could see it. It was building up behind her eyes. Her small hands clutched under her chest and the soft sniff made him certain it was going to happen. He didn't know why it hurt so much to see those tiny tears slip from the corners of her golden eyes and why he could feel so much guilt and pain for causing them while he couldn't feel any love. He suddenly regretted asking her to come to such a secluded park at the edge of Second Miltia. He hadn't exactly wanted to make the scene at the Durandal, but now that he thought about it, it probably would've been a better idea. Ziggy was going to murder him later, he could just feel it. The very idea made him check for his guns. They sat on a wooden bench, MOMO close to tears and Jr. freaking right the fuck out. Jr. shook his head. Now wasn't the time to feel sorry for himself. "MOMO," he started, placing a hand lightley over hers. "Please look at me." She raised her eyes to meet his blue ones.

"There we go." he moved his other hand to push her chin up just a little bit more. He smiled sweetly at her. "MOMO, you are beautiful, you really are." Tears rolled down her cheeks and he almost lost his composure when he felt it fall on his hand. "But...we just can't do this. You know that too, don't you? You know who I am. You know what I am."

"I just thought that I could make it work. I could, couldn't I?" She wrapped her hands around his wrist. "There just has to be something." The desperation in her voice almost broke his heart. He sighed heavily and dropped his hand. "MOMO, I've tried so hard. You're so perfect and I just don't understand why. Why I can't force myself to love you. Why it can't be something that someone can demand at anytime, but..."

"You love someone else."

Jr. looked down, confirming her question. She bit her bottom lip. "Well...whoever she is, she's very lucky." Jr. was hating himself more and more by the minute. He was wondering how Gaignun would handle a situation like this. "Forgive me, MOMO." he finally said, defeated and horrible. "I'm a monster for doing this to you." He waited for her to cry some more and make him drown in his guilt when he she encircled him in her arms. She laid her head on his shoulder and squeezed him tight.

"MOMO?"

"Jr., I understand. I'm so much younger than you, but I think I understand and it's ok. Just promise me that you'll always be around. I don't think I could survive with you."

Jr. smiled, she really was perfect. He returned the hug, so happy to have a such a wonderful person for a friend. "I promise, MOMO."

Gaignun smiled to himself. He was proud of the way Jr. handled that situation, but then again Jr. had always been gentle with himself around MOMO so it wasn't all that surprising. The important thing was that Jr. was ok. "Master Gaignun, you wished to see us?" Shelley asked, slyly. They walked into the Durandal's park, or Shelley did. Mary was grinning happily to herself and humming something. "Hiya, Master Gaignun!"

The girls walked up to him. "Watcha need us for?" The blonde woman asked, oblivious to the serious nature of this meeting. "I have something to tell you, both of you." Shelley's lips curved into a delicate smile and Mary occupied herself with the environmental bugs in the Durandal's park. "I've fallen in love, or I've been in love and I have to tell you-"

"Oh, Master Gaignun!" Mary screamed, running to him. "I knew you loved me more than Shelley! I was just waiting for you to confess your love for me!"

Oh no. "Um..Mary," Shelley started, pulling her sister away. "Let's give the Master some time to finish what he is trying to say."

"I know what he's going to say." Mary snapped at her sister before turning back to say,"Go on, Master Gaignun. Tell her."

Gaignun backed up a little and smiled sympathetically at the girl.

"I'm sorry, Mary. I didn't know you were expecting so much, and that was my mistake. I've come to tell you both that...your services as my..." he tried to think of a proper word, "...kept women are no longer needed. I've fallen in love with..." It was strange. He almost couldn't say it. It was as if once spoken aloud it will have been a dream. Finally, he gathered enough strength to speak his name. "Jr."

Shelley's smile had a brilliance in its graceful beauty and she bowed low before saying, "Master Gaignun, that's wonderful! Has the Little Master returned your affections?"

Gaignun nodded happily. "I wish you the absolute best, Master Gaignun. I'm glad to have been able to serve you for so long-"

"What?!" Mary screamed, cutting off her sister mid-sentence. "Master Gaignun, you can't! He's your brother! It's, it's disgusting!" Gaignun flinched at her words. He was surprised. Mary was always bubbly and happy. It didn't make sense why she would get so upset. Shelley tried to silence her sister, but it didn't work. "Master Gaignun! You can't do this to me! I love you! I've loved you for years! You can't love the Little Master, you just can't!"

Gaignun was shocked and hurt by this. Mary and Shelley had always been very close to him, people he could trust and depend on. Had he really misjudged her emotions?

"Mary, I'm sorry."

"No! You're not!" She screamed. She ran our of the park and away from Gaignun. He stood there in his place, shaken by her reaction. He had been certain that he would've gotten support and it hurt him to know that he had hurt her that deeply. "Master Gaignun," Shelley started. She walked up to him and took his hand in hers. "She's just upset, Master. Please forgive her. I'm sure with time, she will come to see that this is for the best."

"I'm sorry that I've hurt you both so much." Gaignun said. His green eyes were filled with a multitude of emotions as he tried to figure out what to do and wondering if he was making the biggest mistake of his life. Shelley placed a kiss on his lips and stepped back. "Master Gaignun, I know you love the Little Master. Perhaps, it is with a love that neither I nor my sister can fully understand. In our own way, we loved you too. You must understand that. Mary can often be childlike, but she is a very passionate girl. She wasn't prepared for this, as I was."

"You're too good to me, Shelley."

"On the contrary, Master Gaignun. It is only your happiness I seek."

Gaignun embraced her. "Do not worry about Mary, Master Gaignun. I will talk to her."

"Have I done something wrong, Shelley? Do you find me disgusting for feeling the way I do?"

Shelley held him tighter. "Love is a powerful criminal, Master Gaignun. I'm afraid, we've all fallen victim to it."

Later that night Gaignun was in his room, brooding. He could hear Jr. and MOMO in the hallway. Her giggling and Jr.'s loud voice announced their arrival. He was glad that Jr. and MOMO would still be on good terms, but he couldn't get Mary's words out of his mind. He had been so happy that morning. Jr. was his...or he was Jr.'s rather. He had been on top of the world, but Mary had blind-sided him and he was back on Second Miltia, in his ship, upset again. Jr.'s smile cheered him up though. The door slid shut behind the little gunslinger. "Gotcha'!" He yelled, pulling out a gun and aiming it at Gaignun's head. Gaignun didn't flinch, only stared in amusement. "And after you shoot me, what are you planning to do?"

"Simple," Jr. answered, walking forward. "I'm going to take over the world. You've been holding me back. I'll never reach my true potential."

"I see." Gaignun said, nodding. "And the Kukai Foundation?"

"I plan to either burn it down or give it to a hobo."

"Can't go wrong with either."

"I know, right? I'm just that smart." Jr. placed the gun against Gaignun's side. He pulled the trigger, making a loud clicking noise. Gaignun smiled. "Looks like it's empty."

"Aw, I guess it is." Jr. said, pulling it back to examine the chamber. "Well now what?"

"This," Gaignun bent down, placing a passionate kiss on Jr.'s lips. I'll never get tired of this, Gaignun thought. Jr. tried not to melt from the contact. "So, how'd it go with Mary and Shelley?" Jr. asked, pulling back. "Not very well at all. Jr., I think maybe we've made a mistake."

Jr. frowned and stared up at him through forceful blue eyes. "What would make you say that?"

Gaignun didn't have to answer, though. Jr. sighed. He pulled off his jacket and drapped it across the back of Gaignun's chair before sitting down in it and propping his legs upon the desk. "Gaignun, don't worry about her. She'll get over it." He had to admit though, if MOMO had said those words to him, he would've felt horrible. Then again, MOMO hadn't known that it was Gaignun she had lost to. "Her face, Jr....there was so much sadness behind it. I've never caused so much pain to anyone before."

_It's ok, Gaignun. We'll be ok. Everyone will. We just have to get used to it that's all. She'll forgive you._

_I hope so._

_She will_. Jr. sent, jumping up from his seat. He walked over to Gaignun and grabbed his hand. Gaignun looked down at his brother and smiled. _I hate how you affect me._

_Nah, you love it and you know it._ Jr. winked at him.

"Are you tired, Gaignun? Let's go to bed."

Gaignun lie in bed that night, Jr. in his arms, again in disbelief at what was happening. He rubbed his hand over Jr.'s dragon tattoo and marveled again at reality. Jr. laughed at the contact._ That tickles stop! _Gaignun did it again. _I said quit!_ Jr. sent threateningly. Gaignun did it again, jumping on top of him to trap him. "Stop it!" Jr. laughed hysterically, trying to escape the larger man. It took him a few minutes to weasel away but when he did, he pounced on Gaignun, pushing him onto the floor and landing on top of him. "I was trying to sleep." Jr. said, feigning anger.

"I was trying to play."

"You're not the play type."

"I am now."

"What's gotten into you?"

"What's gotten into _you_?"

Jr. blushed. "Shut up! I'm going to bed! If you don't want to sleep with me in a normal platonic way tonight, then...then...I'll find someone else to sleep with!"

Gaignun laughed, "Ok, ok don't do that." He lifted Jr. up and settled him into their bed, lying beside him. Jr. pretended to be angry for a little while longer before Gaignun pulled him close again. Jr. protested at first, but finally settled. It was a strange feeling. Jr.'s small body curled up beside him, his head on his shoulder, hand on his chest. How was it possible for Jr. to awaken such emotions within him? Sadness had no meaning if the boy's smiling face was there to skillfully eliminate it with his flawless smile. If love was a criminal, then the people who made others fall in love were most definatley accomplices, and if that was true then it went without saying that Jr. was the smoothest criminal of them all.

* * *

Albedo was down to his last 100-series. He held her gently, his eyes insanely mocking her existance, just as he had the others. He pulled her close and took in her scent. "Ah, Rubedo. I can smell you on this rag doll. Have you been making friends with the Sans Valuer again? Aren't you the kind one?" The 100-series gasped as Albedo placed a hand into her stomach, digging around for information on the variant. "Oh, hm...what is this? One of the Nigredo wenches is upset is she? I wonder why." His evil rang in the Realian's ears. "Poor little Sans Valuer. You do not know the cause? Executioner, what has you so distracted lately? A Dragon in your midst?" Albedo moved his arm to the Realian's head, finding more. "Ah, Mary. Yes, Mary!" Albedo twisted the body in his arms, making her cry out in pain. "Why do you scream, Sans Valuer? No one cares for a decayed flower!" He took a handful of her platinum blue hair and with a powerful jerk snapped her neck. "Rubedo, don't worry for Nigredo. I'll take good care of him."

* * *

A/N: Wow, I'm done. I hope that didn't suck as much as I feel like it did. ^^; Oh, um...in case of any confusion, the 100-series that Albedo has with him are from the Durandal. He totally stole them, he's ninja like that. XD Well anyways, hope it didn't disappoint! Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people! CX


	9. I Love You

A/N: Yes, I updated tonight. C: This chapter's a little shorter than the others, but I thought it might be important to understand when Gaignun actually fell in love with Jr. CX Maybe it's not and I was just feeling the fluff. Idk. The next chapter will be better though.

The Original Oxymoron: Thank you so much for your compliments. CX And yes, Albedo will get his very own chapter. How did you know!? Are you a ninja too? 0.0

Ganon XD: Whoa, let's all calm down a little bit and breathe. Breathe. XD And to your lamb that you so randomly bought at Wal-Mart that is extra fluffly and cute. I'm glad you decided to name him Lamb Jr. after my Jr. he is a little creepy too. I hope this chapter pleases him.

Albedo's Jerusalem: (or applesauce, since you said I could call you that??) Yes, I've been updating a lot. 0.0 A lot a lot. So just calm down and relax. This story's writing itself.

Tualha: First of all, I'm not stupid. I purposely wrote Friday so that I wouldn't be expected to update tonight, but thank you for ruining that. --; And also, hush. No one cares what you think and to anyone reading this, she has not played Xenosaga and does not understand its greatness. So if you read her reveiws and find her stupid. She is. XD The end.

I do not on Xenosaga, but I wish I did b/c there would've been a lot more of our favorite U.R.T.V.'s CX

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 9  
I love you

Nigredo awoke in a hospital or so he guessed. The walls were white and he was strapped to a bed with wires poked into him. So it wasn't hard to guess. He blinked against the white lights and frowned at the racking pain that seized his body. "Ow..." he groaned pathetically. As if making noise was going to make him feel any better. He raised his right hand to shield his eyes but it wasn't enough. With great effort he began to raise the other when he felt something slid off. Squinting against the light, he found Rubedo asleep against the bed. That's why he'd felt so heavy. Rubedo lay halfway stretched across the bed, his head on Nigredo's legs. He smiled. Had Rubedo stayed up all night with him? He carefully opened the link between them, trying to gain information without waking him up.

"You can't take me away from him!" Rubedo screamed, trying to make his way behind the white doors where Nigredo had vanished. "You can't! He'll die!"

A silver haired boy held onto his shoulders, trying to whisper calming words. "I won't lose him! I won't let him die!"

"He'll be ok." the boy whispered, pulling Rubedo away. "It's just to stop the bleeding. Just a small nanosurgery." But that didn't convince Rubedo. He fought against the boy who held him.

"I want to go with him! Let me go with him!" He yelled angrily, "What the hell is wrong with you!?"

The boy held him turned him around, holding his arms against his sides to stop all his thrashing. "Look, he's going to be ok."

"Not without me! I-I need to be there! I need to help!"

"If you go in there," chaos said, frowning, "You could contaminate the sterile field. If you just stay here and wait a little while, he should be out in about an hour. Just relax, ok? He'll be fine."

Rubedo stared daggers at him. "If he dies," he threatened darkly, "I'm going to fucking kill you."

The boy only nodded and smiled at him. "If he does, I'll gladly give you the opportunity."

Rubedo hadn't left his side since the moment they'd brought him out of the surgery room. chaos came in from time to time to say encouraging words and to make sure Rubedo ate. Three days and nights Nigredo was under and unresponsive to the random cursing Rubedo was screaming at him. "Damnit Nigredo! Wake up! You're driving me fucking insane! I know you're alive, I can hear your pulse! Quit ignoring me. If you don't wake up soon then I'm going to kill you, you bastard! Nigredo!"

On the fourth day, Rubedo was still awake, complaining through the link to his silent brother when Nigredo screamed. His green eyes snapped open in fear. A glazed shadow haunted his eyes as he blindly screamed.

"Nigredo, what's wrong?" Rubedo jumped up. Nigredo was thrashing and arching off the bed from pain, straining against the wires. "Nigredo?!" But he couldn't hear him, lost in his pain. Rubedo threw open the door and looked up and down the hallways for someone, anyone. No one, not even chaos was around. What kind of hospital was this? Nigredo's shrieks brought him back into the room. Rubedo forced his way through the link, something he hated to do unless he absolutley had to. _Yo, Rubedo_. Rubedo shook with anger at Albedo's presence.

_What are you doing to him?_

_Why, Rubedo I haven't done a thing._

_What are you doing to him?! _

_What is it you see in him that made you abandon me Rubedo? Tell me!_

Nigredo screamed again. _STOP IT!!_

There was laughter. _I just love to hear your anger, Rubedo. Please, scream at me more! I love it_! Sick laughter floated to him from down the link. _Oh, and say goodbye to Nigredo for me_.

_Albedo! _Rubedo threatened, but he was gone again. No no no no no! Rubedo panicked. He had no idea what to do. Nigredo was screaming, writhing, dying from whatever Albedo had caused. There was no way he'd survive the pain, it was shutting his body down. It fought against it, trying to go into shock, but it couldn't. Whatever Albedo had infected him with was making his body torture itself, soak up the pain. Rubedo, in a desperate attempt to save his brother, pressed down on Nigredo's shoulders with both hands to keep him as still as he could. With a dying link and incredible speed, Rubedo began absorbing his brother's pain. It was so intense he didn't know if he could do it, almost couldn't even handle a piece of it, but he pulled it out anyway. He trembled under his pain, soaking it up bit by bit until Nigredo's eyes fell shut again and his screaming stopped. The link broke immediatley and Rubedo fell to the floor, trembling in agony. I can handle this...he told himself bitterly, I can handle this. As long as Nigredo's ok. I can do this. Nigredo stayed unconcious for the next two days, while a sleepless Rubedo fought the pain. Finally, on the sixth day of his vigil, the pain was gone. He collapsed on the white sheets. He took one last look at his younger brother and grabbed hold of his hand. "If you're not awake when I get up." An exhausted Rubedo barked, "I'm going to fucking rip you apart." And with that he passed out.

Nigredo was shocked at all of this. Had he really been out for six days? Had Rubedo really...? "Nigredo..." Nigredo looked over at a sleeping Rubedo, talking in his light sleep. "Wake up, please. Don't...be stupid. I need you..." He smacked his lips together and rubbed his face against the sheets. "Idiot..." he sighed. Nigredo almost cried, grabbing hold of Rubedo's hand and squeezing it tightly. "Rubedo, you're absolutley amazing." He watched Rubedo sleep, ignoring the weakening pain, thankful so much for his brother. I love you, Rubedo.

* * *

Gaignun couldn't help but smile when he awoke. Jr. lie asleep in his arms. He looked so peaceful. He hadn't moved all night, glued permanently to Gaignun's side. It was still early, but Gaignun didn't care. He'd never been so awake in his life. It was as if his brain had demanded him to spend every waking second he could with Jr. He smiled involuntarily at the boy's peaceful face and gently rubbed his back. He placed a kiss on his forehead. Jr. grumbled and frowned. "Always so grouchy." Gaignun said, amused.

"Always so stupid." Jr. said, opening his sleepy blue eyes, a motion Gaignun found extremely beautiful and tilted his head to kiss him again. "Jeez, Gaignun. You're such a girl."

"Perhaps," he said, pulling Jr. closer to him.

"Perhaps," Jr. said mockingly, trying not to make it too obvious how much he liked being pressed up against Gaignun.

"You're a jerk." Gaignun laughed.

"It's better than being a girl." Gaignun placed a hand behind Jr.'s neck, effortlessly flipping them over and placing a deep kiss on his lips. "If I'm a girl," he said huskily, balancing himself on hands and knees above his older brother. "Then why where you my bitch the other night?"

Jr. blushed at 'bitch' and pouted, "You weren't even that good..."

Gaignun kissed him again, coaxing his way into Jr.'s willing mouth. The boy whimpered helplessly and wrapped his small hands into Gaignun's black hair. Gaignun pulled back, a sly smile on his face, enjoying the flush on Jr.'s skin. "I-I-that's...tha'ts not what it looks like!"

Gaignun chuckled, "Jr, just face it. You might as well tattoo 'Property of Gaignun Kukai' on your cute little ass."

Jr. blushed, "Gaignun! When the hell did you start talking like that?! Language, mister! Language!"

"Your language was never good."

"I'm Jr.!" he shouted, throwing his hands up, "I'm supposed to cuss and swear and say ridiculous things! You're Gaignun! You're supposed to be cool and calm and elequent and you know, all that stuff. When did we switch places?!"

"Who said we switched? Maybe I'm more like you than you thought?"

"This is so wrong." Jr. said, smiling.

"Yes, it is." Gaignun said, hanging his head a bit

Jr. laughed and leaned up, "But I like it."

It was Gaignun's turn to blush as Jr. gently placed his lips against his own.

_I love you, Rubedo._

* * *

A/N: Wow, if that wasn't fluffage I don't know what is. XD Things will start picking back up next chapter though. Maybe another lemon if I'm brave enough? XD And what about Albedo? 0.0 He's fantastic, yes. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. C:


	10. Pranks and Punishment

A/N: Guess who it is? No, not Santa. Jr. doesn't like Santa, so why would he be here right now? Anyways, it's Tylida with a super long chapter to beg for forgiveness of the updatinglessness...(what? XD) last night. Well, maybe not "super" long, but...you get the idea. XD

Warning: This chapter does contain amateur lemon. :# Yeah, I totally went there.

I do not own Xenosaga or the greatness that is GaignunxJr. but that doesn't mean I can't worship them.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 10  
Pranks and Punishment

Gaignun was proud of his older brother. He had been extremely good the last four days, getting up on time, doing his work and getting it finished. He had cursed and complained every now and then, but that was just Jr. and if he could get his work done and yell obscenities at the same time then Gaignun didn't have a problem with it. Even now, as Gaignun checked down the link to make sure he wasn't getting raped or blowing something up, he found him on the bridge talking to Shelley about something. He silently thanked God for this ability so that he could check on his tiny partener so convieniantly and started working on his paperwork. Gaignun was so wrapped up in his work that he hadn't even stopped to think (as he should have) that Jr. behaving was just a way to get him to let down his guard. And when chaos walked through the door with a confused look on his face and a small package in his hand, the thought that there was something very suspicious going on never once entered his train of thought (as it should have).

"Hello, chaos," Gaignun said raising his eyes momentarily to the boy and his package. Jr. squirmed from his hiding place, trying to keep quiet as he watched chaos walk over to Gaignun.

"What brings you here?"

"I'm not sure," he said, smiling, "I was given very specific instructions to give you this package and that no one else would be allowed to." he shrugged, "I have no idea who it's from or why I was chosen, but I haven't opened it so I don't know what's inside."

Puzzled, Gaignun walked from around his desk to examine the package. Jr. got ready, positioning himself from his high hiding place. chaos held the package still while Gaignun opened it, pulling off the paper and frowning at how difficult the box was to get open. When he finally opened it, he found a cake with the word "Gotcha'" written in icing on the top. "What in the-" Gaignun started, realizing too late what this meant. With a terrific war cry Jr. jumped off the canopy of their giant bed, landing on his brother and knocking everyone to the floor. With victorious laughter, Jr. pushed himself up and ran out the door. Confused and dazzed, chaos pushed himself up, "What just happened? Oh-" chaos covered his mouth and tried not to laugh as Gaignun pulled his face out of the cake, chunks of chocolate icing clung to his handsome face. He opened his green eyes, shining like a beacon from the cholocate face mask. "I'm going to kill him."

Jr. ran wildly down the hallways of the Residential Area. The workers only laughed at the familar scene and simply made way for their precocius Little Master. Jr. had to act fast. Gaignun was going to catch up with him soon and he needed to find someone who'd be willing to help him. Mary was usually his partener in crime when he pulled his pranks, but she wasn't speaking to him and he knew MOMO wouldn't be willing to do something like this without being tricked into it like chaos. He rounded a corner sharply and almost ran into a 100-series. He slowed himself to a stop and fell hard on his head. "Ow..."

"Little Master," the Realian said, surprised. She pulled him to his feet and dusted him off. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Sorry about that."

"No need to worry Little Master. I am fine."

He smiled and nodded to her. "GAIGNUN KUKAI JR.!"

Jr. flinched at the voice and smiled to himself. "Hey, you think you could help me with something?"

The 100-series nodded. "Great! Here!" Jr. fumbled around in his short black jacket and pulled out two grenades. The Realian's eyes went wide at what he was insinuating. "No,no! I don't want you to hurt anyone," he said, "It's filled with confetti, both of them are. It's just a joke."

The Realian nodded in understanding. "Good, now when Gaignun comes around the corner, throw these at the ground- not at him or it will hurt- and run, so he doesn't find you. I'll take care of the rest."

"Understood." Jr. smiled and waved to her before running down the rest of the hallway in search of a room. He smiled when he found one and hid in a storage closet to wait for Gaignun. He head the explosion and counted to himself...three...two...one..."JR!!"

He couldn't help it anymore. He laughed so hard he grabbed his sides and doubled over. When Gaignun opened the door, he had a mixture of chocolate and something that looked like vanilla on his face. "I forgot!" he laughed, "Those were the pudding grenades!"

Gaignun yanked him out of the closet and pulled him down the pudding covered halls, slipping and sliding the whole way. A few of the workers laughed when they saw their chocolate covered Master pulling his young charge down the hallways. The door slid open and Gaignun pulled a still-laughing Jr. over to their bed where he threw him onto their mattress. "You're going to stay right here while I take a shower and when I get back I'm going to kill you, do you understand me?"

Jr. only laughed and swipped a finger over his brothers face. He placed it into his mouth and smiled. "Well, who knew chocolate cake and vanilla pudding would taste so good together?"

* * *

Gaignun complained to himself as he dilligently scrubbed chocolate from his black hair, even going as far to curse under his breath. He pulled a chunk of pudding off his shoulder and made a disgusted face. He hated pudding. It was so...gross. He shivered as he pulled off more. His poor suit, it was ruined. He lathered hanful of shampoo after handful of shampoo into his hair, trying to scrub his very skull free of the feeling of pudding. _I wasn't trying to cover you in it. I just got them mixed up. I seriously didn't know. _Jr. said, amusment in his message.

_You don't get any last words_. Gaignun sent, washing his face for the third time. _You're just getting the death sentence._

_Aw, why are you so bent on killing me? I thought you loved me._

Gaignun froze.

_**Are you sure you're not just hanging around Rubedo for a chance to carry out your mission...Executioner!**_

_What was that, Gaignun?_

Gaignun shook his head. _Nothing. Ack! I didn't know pudding had skin! _

Jr.'s laugh was so loud Gaignun was sure he could hear it buzzing in his ears. In fact he could. Surprised he turned around. "Jr.! What in the?"

"What?" Jr. asked innocently.

"What are you doing in here!?"

Jr. raised an eyebrow as the circular shower door slid behind him. "Um...taking a shower?"

"No-not while I'm in here!" Gaignun said, backing up against the wall of the too-small shower.

"Please!" Jr. scoffed, placing his back against the clear shower door. "I know for a fact that you've fit three people in here. So don't sit there and lie to me."

"I wasn't. Not technically. If you don't like my thoughts, stop reading them."

"Maybe I will."

"Good."

"Fine."

"Fantastic."

"Stupendous."

"Who uses the word stupendous?"

"Who uses the word fantastic?"

"We're just talking a bunch of nonsense."

"No. You're talking a bunch of nonsense. I'm just the one being forced to listen to it."

"Jr. that is enough! I think you're in enough trouble already, you don't need to-"

Gaignun stopped mid-sentence at the feel of Jr.'s hand on his chest. "Why are you always so stiff with me, Gaignun?" He asked, pressing his body against the younger man's. Gaignun had never really thought about this before, but while Jr. was making him freeze in very warm water he noticed just how small in stature he was to him. Jr.'s head barley reached his chest, stopping midway, the top of his head met the bottom of his heart. Perfect. His face burned a bright red when felt Jr.'s mouth on his abdomen. "Jr.," he said, unsure why exactly he had, seeing as how he had nothing else to say. "Just relax, Gaignun." he whispered, moving downwards. Chills coated Gaignun's skin at the feeling. Jr. laughed, "Jeez, Gaignun." he said to his frozen brother, "You really do like this stuff, huh?" Gaignun was about to ask him what he was talking about when he felt a tug on his half-erection. "Uh! Jr.?!"

"Hm? Is that a protest?" Jr. ran one hand along the shaft slowly, carefully watching his brother's reaction. Gaignun's breathing sped up and his eyes closed against the running water. Jr. smirked, "Yeah, I thought not."

He moved his hand faster, stroking Gaignun's hardness and studying his face carefully, curiously, making sure he was getting the responses he was trying for. Gaignun cried out, uncaring at his sudden loss of power. Jr. smirked and took one look at Gaignun before taking him into his mouth. Gaignun's eyes snapped open and a throaty moan escaped his throat. "Jr.!" He couldn't take it anymore. The way Jr.'s lips moved around him, the warmth, his tongue..."Ah! Jr...! I'm gonna-"

Gaignun's body shook as he came inside Jr.'s mouth. Surprised, the boy coughed, releasing his hold on Gaignun and spitting his mouthful down the drain. Gaignun slid down the slick shower wall, onto his hands and knees, trembling. "Jr..?" he breathed.

"Ha! Not bad, huh?" He said, spitting out more of the thick substance. Gaignun didn't answer, just looked up at him with startled green eyes through wet black hair. "How...?"

Jr. shrugged, "I'm just good like that." Gaignun shook his head, a silent refusal that there's no way he could be that good this fast. "I am, get over it." He said crossing his arms. "So..." he started, as Gaignun slowly pulled himself up. "Am I still in trouble?" Gaignun nodded his head sloppily. "Oh yeah." He took a few steps toward Jr. and picked him up effortlessly, pressing him against the clear shower door. "You're in biiig trouble."

Jr. laughed nervously. "Oh no! Please father, don't punish me!" he cried in mock despair.

Gaignun chuckled and captured his mouth. "Begging's not going to get you out of this one." he whispered. He kissed him again, thrusting his tounge into Jr.'s mouth, feeling a strange sort of pleasure at the taste on Jr.'s tongue. Jr. wrapped his legs around Gaignun's waist, pressing his own hardness against Gaignun's stomach. Gaignun smiled into their kiss and pulled back. He pressed his forehead against Jr.'s, staring straight into his blue eyes. "Looks like you're as excited as I am." he said, wrapping his fingers around Jr.'s erection. "I-I'm not!" Jr. gasped. Gaignun laughed, "You're not a good liar, Jr." The older boy closed his lips against the whimper that tried to crawl out of him. Gaignun ran his mouth over Jr.'s neck, marveling at every movement he made. It had been so dark the last time that it had been impossible to see anything, but this time was different and Gaignun was determined to soak up every visual aspect of this as he could. Balancing his weight against Jr. and the wall, he placed another hand around to Jr.'s entrance, pressing his fingers through as carefully as he could. "Ah! Gaignun...it hurts." Jr. said, squirming a bit. "Relax, Jr. It'll stop soon." Jr. winced and wrapped his arms around Gaignun's neck to keep himself from sliding. Gaignun continued to pump him, trying to distract Jr. from the pain his fingers were causing as he had last time, hoping the pain would stop. Jr.'s moans became louder as the pain gave way to pleasure and he writhed in his pinned position. "Uh...Gaignun! N-now!" Jr. cried, his face flushed from embarassment. Gaignun smirked, "What, Jr.?"

"N-now!"

"Now what?" he asked, biting the bottom of Jr.'s jaw.

There was audible aggrivation in his voice when he spoke, "Take me...now!"

Gaignun removed his fingers and as gently as he could, slid Jr. down onto his arousal. Jr. hissed at the initail pain, but Gaignun was moved carefully inside him, kissing and licking at his neck and returning his hand to Jr.'s arousal. It didn't take as long as Jr. had expected for him to become accustomed to Gaignun's intrusion. His arms and legs tightened around Gaignun's body, holding onto him as he met Gaignun's thrust, deepening penetration for both of them. Encouraged by Jr.'s movements, Gaignun thrust harder, trembling at the sound of Jr.'s voice. They moved together perfectly, fit each other like a glove, and when Jr.'s small body started to tremble with the beginnings of orgasm, Gaignun couldn't help but be fascinated at the little creature collapsing in ecstacy around him. Gaignun picked up his pace, coming only sconds after his small lover, planting loving kisses on his body. "God, I love you." Gaignun said inbetween kisses. He drunk in the sound of Jr.'s shallow breathing. Jr. nodded and patted his back. Gaignun pulled out of him and gently placed Jr. onto the floor of the shower. "Now, can I actually finish my shower?" Gaignun asked, happily. Jr. made a face. "Only if I get to wash you hair." Gaignun smiled.

"Who's the girl, again?" Jr. stuck out his tongue and pulled down the shampoo bottle, turning down the water temperature a little. Gaignun always had it too hott._ It kills germs_. he defended.

_It kills skin too. _Jr. responded, demanding that Gaignun get onto his knees so that he could reach him. Gaignun rolled his eyes, but did it anyway. Jr. rubbed his hands through his hair, even though it was unneeded. It was a simple interaction, but it warmed Gaignun's heart to watch the look on his little lover's face as he frowned, internally cursing about nothing in particular. Gaignun poured shampoo onto Jr.'s head and mimicked the same actions. "Hey! I didn't say you could touch me!" he protested.

"Yes you did." Jr. responded by tugging angrily on Gaignun's hair.

"Hey!"

"Hi." Jr. answered, pulling again. Gaignun tugged sharply on Jr.'s hair.

"Stop." He tugged back.

"You stop." Tug.

"No you!" Tug.

"You first!" Tug, tug.

"Gaignun!" Tug.

"Jr." Tug.

"We're not going to get done if you don't stop."

"Then I guess we'll be stuck in here all day."

"Damnit Gaignun!"

Gaignun laughed and leaned back to wash the shampoo away, moving so Jr. could do the same. Before Gaignun could turn off the water, Jr. had jumped out and wrapped a towel around himself. He grabbed another one and rolled it up in his hands. The minute Gaignun stepped out, he hit him with the end of it. "Ah! Jr.!"

"What?" he asked, in his trademark false innocence.

"Why?"

"Why not?" He did it again, this time leaving a red mark on Gaignun's thigh.

"Ow! Jr.!"

Gaignun quickly grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist and ran out of the door in an attempt to get away from Jr. Jr. laughed wickedly and followed him. When he reared back to hit him again, a horrible ringing noise filled his head and he dropped it to free his hands and place them against his temples. Gaignun swept him up in his arms and carried him to the bed. "I told you to stop." The noise quit and Jr. frowned.

"Who's the jerk again?"

"You." Gaignun answered, placing a kiss on the boy in his arms. The sound of the door sliding open startled them. It happened too fast for them to hide, but when they saw Mary walk in, they both let out a heavy of relief. Mary blushed and looked to the floor. "Master Gaignun, I'm sorry I didn't mean too..."

Gaignun quickly sat Jr. down and composed himself into the calm, stoic man everyone knew him as. "It's alright, Mary. Did you need something?"

Mary nodded and walked away from the door, closer to him. She held her hands behind her back and kept her eyes to the floor the entire time. "I came to apologize and ask for your forgiveness."

She said, bowing. "It wasn't right of me to say those things, and I owe you too much to disrespect you in such a manner."

She must have practiced what she was going to say with Shelley, it sounded too formal for her. Gaignun smiled the practiced smile he'd grown so accustomed to summoning for buisness officials. "Thank you for that, Mary. It really means a lot." Mary nodded and started to leave, but Jr. stopped her. She turned her sad eyes to the boy and waited for whatever he wanted. Jr. smiled at her and walked up to her. She waited a few painful seconds before Jr. wrapped his arms around her in a friendly hug. "We love you, Mary. We never want to see you sad. Please smile like you used to. I miss it."

She returned his hug and nodded. "I sure missed out on that prank you pulled today. I wish I coulda been there. Would've been the greatest."

Jr. pulled away and smiled, "Yeah, that was grade-A work if I do say so myself."

"Gaignun's a little slow when it comes to stuff like that."

_Are you trying to get into more trouble?_

_Depends..._Jr. sent, smiling at an unknowing Mary. _Are you're willing to punish me again?_

* * *

A/N: Wooo! Done. CX Well I hope that one made up for the fact that I was too busy to update yesterday. Hooray for busy days! XD Reviews are my muse, so inspire it up people.


	11. Tabloids

A/N: Hello. C: Another update, why yes it is. I have a feeling that you're all going to kill me though. CX Actually, I'm pretty sure you are, but you can't spell conflict without Albedo (even though you can). So on with the fic!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters but I don't think I'll ever get them after this chapter. ^^;

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 11  
Tabloids

Jr. was beginning to wonder just how he had survived without being this close to Gaignun. His whole world was changing and he wasn't sure how to handle it. Was it a good thing that he was slowly becoming even more attached to Gaignun or was it a bad thing? Was it a good thing that he was checking up on his brother more and more often, just to be near him or was it weak and foolish of him? He felt himself becoming more and more willing and eager to please Gaignun. Every little thing he could do to make Gaignun happy he did, hiding how much he liked to see him smile. Gaignun had said he wasn't very good at lying, but he was good at hiding and that's all that mattered. Gaignun couldn't know that Jr. liked the way it felt when he said sweet things to him. He couldn't know how his mind whirled when Gaignun kissed him and he definatley couldn't know how it made him feel when he whispered, "I love you, Jr."

"Shelley, what does Gaignun...like?" Jr. had asked one day at the bridge. He stood, blushing and looking around to make sure no one heard him. Shelley smiled at him and pretended to continue working, so that it would look like they were discussing something work-related. Jr. would never be able to describe how grateful he was for her. "Be specific, Little Master." she said, toying with him.

He groaned angrily. "Shelley, come on. I need to know. Please." She smiled to herself and nodded, telling Jr. everything he wanted to know and probably a few things he didn't. She'd even gotten so descriptive at one point that he was afraid she was going to pull down a screen of Gaignun's anatomy and grab a pointer from out of thin air. It had been the most embarrassing hour of his entire life but he was glad he'd asked because it had worked out in the end and Gaignun was still in shock over it. Jr. lie next to him, laughing over his victory with his pranks.

"It was better than the prank you pulled on our birthday, I'll give you that."

Jr. grinned, "Of course it was. I'm just that good."

"You're always good, Jr."

"I didn't know though, honest. I got them mixed up, I didn't want to use them after last year after you told me you didn't like pudding."

"Sure," Gaignun said, pulling Jr. close to him and nuzzeling his face in Jr.'s neck.

"I'm telling the truth." For a moment, they were both silent in the darkness.

"Jr.?" Gaignun started quietly.

"Yeah?" There was another long pause before Gaignun spoke again.

"I want to thank you for this. All of this, everything you've done. I know...that this might be hard for you sometimes, but I'm glad you're giving me a chance. These last few weeks have been the best of my life." Gaignun kissed Jr.'s neck, making him shiver. He grinned, "Thank you."

Gaignun...Jr. thought, surprised when it hadn't come out of his throat as he had expected it to. I...

"Jeez, you're such a sap." Jr. responded. Maybe he just wasn't brave enough. Maybe he was afraid.

"You've made me that way." Maybe he just couldn't put it into words.

"You were always that way." Maybe it was too strong a phrase on its own.

"Shut up and sleep, Jr." Maybe he was just wasn't strong enough to say it.

"Make me." Gaignun lifted his head and placed a loving kiss on his lips, forcing the boy's mind into sweet oblivion. I love you, Gaignun. Perhaps this is why Jr. had never seen this one coming. Why neither of them had and why when the moment arrived, neither knew what to do and it was too late.

* * *

Jr. had first heard the message with chaos. He was bragging about his terrific accomplishment over Gaignun the day before when Shelley came running for him. "Little Master, I need to see you, it's urgent." Jr. nodded and said goodbye to his friend before following her. "What is it, Shelley?"

"Little Master, I'm afraid our time is short and there is no time to talk. You must see for yourself."

Worried and suddenly serious, Jr. followed Shelley to the bridge. The elevator stopped and they entered hastily. 100-series and workers had formed themselves around the captain's seat, looks of surprise on their faces. "Little Master, watch." Shelley said, she moved quickly, pressing a button to summon the overhead monitor. A news Realian sat at a table before the camera, a stern look on her face. She held a piece of paper of paper in her hands, but she didn't read off of it, staring straight into the lens.

"And as it appears, Gaignun Kukai will be held fully responsible. A team has appeared to retrieve the boy as soon as possible. He should be in federal custody by the end of the day. Gaignun Kukai will be arrested and will remain in custody until his trial where-"

Jr. was confused, as he had already missed the major part of this announcement. "Shelley, what's happening?"

Shelley turned her purple eyes to him, trying to control her fear. "Pictures of you and the Master together have been given to the news stations and tabloids. Little Master, they have deemed Master Gaignun an unfit father. They are coming here to take you away from us."

"What?!" Jr. asked, he turned his head back to the monitor. It was true. All of it was true. "How could have--?! Why would anyone--?!"

_Gaignun! Gaignun!_

_I know, Jr. I'm talking to Helmer as we speak. _

_Gaignun! They can't do that! They can't take me away from you! I'm twenty-six! I'm an adult! _

_They don't know that, Jr. you're registered as my adopted son, you know that. Not even the workers or the people of the Foundation know we're related._

_What did the pictures look like, Gaignun?_

_Someone...someone took pictures of us yesterday. I don't know who, but someone took pictures of us in the shower together. They're...everywhere._

_Gaignun, we have to tell them, we have to!_

_We can't, Jr. Do you know how dangerous that would be? Letting them know who we are?_

_I won't let them take me from you!_

Jr. pushed himself from the panel and ran to the elevator. The minute he stepped out of the doors, unfamiliar people in blue uniforms came walking towards the bridge. They advanced on him the moment they saw him, trying to call him forward. "Get the hell away from me!" Jr. threatened, pulling his guns from his back pockets. The crowd backed up. "I swear to God I'll fucking shoot you." A tall man from the group, disbelieving the fourteen-year old boy's threats, stepped up to grab him. Jr. shot him without hesitation in his shoulder, uncaring of the gasps that sprung from the people. Jr. fired another round into the air. "I dare you to try and touch me again." The crowd moved away from him as he ran into the transport. He flew from the open door, running full speed to their room. Why? Why was this happening now? Who would've purposely snuck into their room just to take pictures? What was going on? The same workers who had smiled and laughed warmly at him the day before, stared in shock and dismayed confusion as he reached his bedroom. The door slid open.

"I don't care, Helmer!" Gaignun yelled, "You have to help me. Please, help me!"

"Gaignun, you're going to have to calm down, I know this is stressful. I've don't think I've ever seen you so upset."

"They're trying to take Jr. away from me! Please Helmer!" Gaignun's head snapped up at Jr.'s arrival, fear in his green eyes. "Gaignun..." Jr. choked, unsure of what would happen to his voice if he continued.

"Gaignun, I can't help you today. I'll get busy talking with the Second Miltian government on this right away, but there's no possible way I can stop them from taking him. It will only be for a day at the most. I have no choice. I'm sorry."

Their door opened and people poured in, this time armed. They slammed themselves against the walls, pointing their guns at the two of them.

"Drop your weapons!" One of them cried.

_I could kill them. _Jr. sent, staring straight at his brother. _I could kill them all. One movement._ Jr.'s body began to shake as his anger built. _I could slaughter them._

_But you won't_, _Jr._ _You can't. _

_I could. I could. I could. I could._

"Drop your weapons!"

_Jr..._

Jr. raised his arms high enough for the people behind him to see. He dropped his precious Makarov's onto the floor. He didn't wait for them to grab him and instead took off running for his younger brother. "I won't let them keep you, Jr." Gaignun whispered, bending down and wrapping the boy in his arms. "Gaignun, I didn't get to tell you this. I wish I had. But..."

"That's enough!" The people began to circle around him, prying his arms away from Gaignun's back.

_I love you._

With almost no struggle, Jr. allowed them to drag him away, sadness in his eyes.

"Gaignun Kukai, you are under arrest for counts of..."

Gaignun stood, unlistening as the officer planted handcuffs onto his wrists. The only thing he heard was Jr.'s loud cursing as the door shut behind him.

"Where the hell are you taking me?" A down, but not defeated Jr. asked angrily.

"To your brother and away from that pervert. You're safe now."

"Don't you dare talk about him like that! I was never in danger, you idiot! And I don't have a brother!" Jr. barked.

"Oh, did he keep it a secret?" One of the other officers laughed, "You didn't even know about your family before your adoption?"

"You aren't making any fucking sense."

"We're taking you to your new home, to your guardian."

"I don't have a goddamn brother."

"Yes you do." the first officer said, rolling his eyes. "Albedo Piazzolla."

* * *

Gaignun morphed into his old calm, suave self; a defense mechanism. He was polite to his captures and did everything they asked without protest, even ignoring the mocks of the officers as they called him names he didn't deserve. They just didn't understand. He would forgive them for now, as long as he got Jr. back. That's all that mattered. He kept his link closed in order to concentrate fully on the instructions and accusations given and made toward him. He followed them, hands behind his back into the hallways of the residential area; a royal walking to his execution. The workers stared angrily at their intruders. Guilty or not, Gaignun and Jr. were their masters and no one likes to see their hero bound and badgered. Gaignun walked with an air that suggested he was in control of the situation, not the other way around and as he reached the transport that would take him onto Second Miltian soil he had convinced the rest of the ship that he was going to be alright. Shelley and Mary waited for him on either side of the small sliding gate that would allow him to reach the transport. He looked at Shelley, her right hand over her mouth as she tried not to cry, and gave her an almost invisible smile to reassure her. When he turned to do the same for Mary, he saw that she was sobbing. He was curious as to why she wasn't yelling instead, demanding them to release him, and give him support. Again she let him down. She looked up at him, blue eyes red from crying and said so low it was almost inaudible. "I'm sorry, Master Gaignun...I didn't know."

Then it dawned on him, and he stared at her through confused and hurt eyes as they dragged him away.

* * *

A/N: Yep, you can kill me if you want to...but if you do that then you won't get Albedo's chapter. CX So maybe you should hold off on the fatal stabbing until after the next update. XDDD

Yes, the next update will be all about Albedo (minus entrances and stuff, gotta have a little bit of Gaignun and Jr. in there, right?). It might not be updated as fast as the others as Albedo's language is kind of hard to get just right. ^^; So bear with me, it will be up soon, so hold off on the stabbing...please?....*backs away slowly* Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! C:


	12. Oxymoronic Tautology

A/N: Ok, so I have some explaining to do. ^^; I had promised this chapter would be the Albedo chapter and so when I started today that's what it was going to be, but unfortunatley it turned into this. Don't ask, b/c I have no idea. --;

This chapter is a little scattered, but it's supposed to be that way. It does give some insight to what Albedo was doing from after he tried to rape Jr. to where he is now and some of his methods, but we'll get more into that next chapter for sure, since there's absolutley no way that it can't be about Albedo! It just can't!

Partially because of its random and scattered nature, I've named this chapter oxymoronic tautology.

An oxymoron would be something like negative optimist while a tautology would be something like tiny small. You put them together and what do they make? ...another oxymoron...! :D

Pretty clever, right? Right? No, no it's not. --;

But it makes just about as much sense as this scatter-brained chapter. If you can't understand or you just want to complain, you know you can PM me. XD

This chapter is partially named after and dedicated to** The Original Oxymoron**:  
1.) Your penname is just fantastic!  
2.) That last review you left me about the Micheal Jackson deal was priceless. It made me laugh so hard. XD  
3.) B/c **Virgin Planet** is really fantastic and anyone reading this should read that one too! :D  
And I am sorry to you for ruining your Albedo chapter, I'll make it up next time for reals! D: *begs forgiveness*

I do not own Xenosaga, but the way this chapter sounds I might as well have been a writer!

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 12  
Oxymoronic Tautology

Albedo returned unscathed from his encounter with Jr. and Gaignun. He breathed in the scent of his clothes, loving the smell that was so purely labeled Rubedo into its very stitches. He grinned wickedly, throwing himself onto his new throne, soaking up the darkness of this decaying machine. What a wonderful instrument, this new toy he had found. He looked up around him at the structure. An object that could link instantly with U-DO. Ah, such a wonderful tool. Originally, Albedo had wanted, no needed the Y-data for access to U-DO, to the cursed realm of Miltia where it slept. "Ah, Mizrahi's madness had its uses, the sly old lunatic." The very walls here echoed of U-DO, begged for human contact, screamed for Albedo. "Ah, such power. Can you feel this Rubedo? The eminsity of it all. Let me show it to you." The purple waves circled around his arms, beckoning him. He laughed at the sight, an idea forming in his twisted mind. "Rubedo, my dear Rubedo. You should see this place." He drew a claw along the arm of his infected chair, enjoying the waver in the energy. "You'll love it."

* * *

"You can't!" Jr. screamed, suddenly forgetting the calm Gaignun had instilled in him. "You can't do that!" He strained against the arms that held him. "You idiots! He's more dangerous than Gaignun could ever be!" The officers frowned and held him still.

"Be still, boy!"

"Heh, maybe he liked it. Is that what it is, you little freak? You 'in love' with your own father?"

Jr. suddenly missed the weight of his guns in his pockets. He gritted his teeth and tried to calm himself. It was so much easier to call on his power when he didn't have a machine to hide behind.

_**Are you that afraid of yourself, Rubedo?**_

"Let go of me you bastards!"

They held him tight and carried him away, kicking and screaming to the transport. They managed to force him into a hovercar. They sat Jr. on one side of the automoblie and sat down on the seat across from him. The officer gave the coordinates to the machine and the car pulled away from the station. Jr. was having a hard time containing himself. He needed Gaignun more than ever right now. He placed his head in his hands and took deep breaths. It would be ok. It would be ok, because the minute he and Albedo were alone, he'd gladly take his anger out on him. "Look! He's crying!" One of them said, laughing.

"He's what?"

"Crying! Look at him over there!"

The second officer looked away from the window, mistaking Jr.'s shaking for quite sobs. "Aw, what's wrong little boy? You're not getting your daily does of incest today?"

Jr.'s body shook with his anger, but he contained it. Gaignun would be disappointed if he lost control. That'd only make things worse. "It's technically not incest," the first officer said, slapping the other on the back of the head. "Stupid, he was adopted."

"Oh, then...pedophilia?" The first guard laughed.

"Hey, maybe he liked the whole idea. He looks like a little faggot, don't you think?"

Breathe, Jr. Breathe.

"You mean, willingly? Isn't that a bit harsh? He's just a kid." The first officer said.

"Nah, he shot officer Brant in the shoulder, he's a regular little man."

In, out. Inhale, exhale. Breathe, count to ten...eleven...tweleve...

"Aw, come on dude."

"What? He's not ashamed of it, are you?" The officer turned around to look at Jr. "Was that the deal from the beginning? You agree to be his little sex slave? Was he good? Is that why you never told anyone? Hm? What a pathetic little boy."

...

Well. At least Jr. could say that he tried.

* * *

"Master Gaignun?" The 100-series had asked, following the distrubed man down the hallway. He didn't answer, instead walking quickly away. She frowned, Master Gaignun never ignored anyone. He was always so polite, so gentlemanly. There must've been something wrong. "Master Gaignun." She said again, following him down the hall, faster. He turned a corner and she followed behind him, almost running to keep up with his speed. "Master Gai-" she said, stopping suddenly in her tracks. This hallway was a deadend, so it didn't make sense that he had just disappeared. "Master Gaignun?" She asked again, searching her sensors for his presence. Behind her? That didn't make sense at all. She turned around in time to see him. A sick smile spread across his face. The image scared her. "You called for me," Gaignun started. She stared in horror as his beautiful green eyes suddenly flashed purple and his body began to pale. "Sans Valuer?"

* * *

Gaignun stood in the center of the pitch black room under a blue light, hands cuffed behind his back. He stood as straight as his body would allow, a serene look on his face. To his right sat his defense attorney, to the left, the prosecutor. Three judges sat in front of him, frowning. Gaignun was calm, serene, answering questions skillfully and masterfully, confounding his enemy even with the piling evidence. "Is it not true, Gaignun Kukai..." he said from his seat. "That you and your son have a very unhealthy relationship?"

"I think it's quite the opposite."

"Oh really? Then what would you call this?" The attorney pointed a remote toward the ceiling causing a screen to appear between Gaignun and the jugdes he was facing. He clicked through the pictures, showing every little detail of their sin. Gaignun remained visibly calm despite being majorly upset that something so wonderfully shared between the two of them was being publically displayed as a weapon against him. "I have no idea where those pictures have come from." Gaignun answered.

"They came from your ship. Is that not your shower? Is this not you in the picture? Is this not your son pressed against the glass?"

Gaignun frowned. "Gaignun Jr. and I have many enemies. It is no coincidence that these pictures have appeared in order to ruin our credibility after the Proto Merkabah incident."  
"Are you saying that U-TIC has orchestrated a scandal such as this to ruin your good stance with the Federation?"

"On the contrary," Gaignun answered, inclining his head toward the man. "I'm suggesting that someone with a vendetta or grudge must have thought this would be sufficient enough to cause a public uproar."

The attorney smirked, "Please excuse my disbelief, Mr. Kukai, but that seems a little far-fetched."

"Was it far-fetched when anti-Miltian organizations doctored a previously recorded video right down to the time axis and battle coordinates to make it appear as if the Durandal had destroyed an already reported demolished Federation fleet? Was it far-fetched when their own agent retrieved an object thrown into the abyss and aimed it at your capital? Was it far-fetched when my own son went in order to stop them?"

The attorney seemed a little put off by this, feeling as if his all the evidence at his disposal was worthless.

"Please excuse my outburst." Gaignun said, bowing his head slightly toward the judges.

This seemed to fluster the prosecution even more. "Well, please Mr. Kukai, explain to the court what is occuring on this recording."

He clicked another button and out of invisible speakers came Jr.'s sarcastic voice. "So...am I still in trouble?"

"Oh yeah, you're in biiig trouble."

"Oh no father! Please don't punish me!"

"Begging's not going to get you out of this one. It looks like you're just as excited as I am."

"I-I'm not!"

"You're not a good liar, Jr."

"Ah! It hurts!"

"Relax, Jr. It'll stop soon."

"Gaignun! No-no!"

Gaignun's eyes widened as he listened, trying to think of something, anything to say. But by the time the attorney, with a smirk on his lips and victory in his eyes, asked his question all Gaignun could think of to say-in the most calm and apathetic voice he could muster- was:

"Goddamnit."

* * *

Mary was hesitant about this. She stood outside her Master's door, the tiny camera in her hands.  
"Foolish girl," Albedo had said, placing her chin in his hands. He stared at her viciously, a false smile on his face. "Why would Nigredo need a toy like you? So fragile, so frail! Crying like a baby at a simple rejection. What needless objects women are!" Mary had been surprised by him, caught in her mindless heartbreak and flee from the Durandal's park. He gently clawed at her chin, enjoying the frozen fear in her eyes. "The reason for your stupidity, tell me!" he pressed her chin sharply toward him, leaning down quickly as if to kiss her. "Is Nigredo that irresistable? An addiction that your blood has grown too accustomed to live without?" Their breath mingled as his grip tightened on her, threatening the integrity of her bones. "Fight for him. Redeem your useless gender. Give him a reason to forever regret his decision."

She could hear them in the shower. The Little Master was trying to seduce her Gaignun. Her Master Gaignun. With an angry mind and a sick heart she placed pressed a button on her connection gear and left it outside the door to record the audio. Then quickly, running to her Master's desk, she pressed a button to make sure the doors wouldn't open automatically before running back to the door and sliding it open manually just enough to get the lens through. They were so caught up in each other, they didn't notice. She took a deep breath and started taking the pictures. When they were done and had started washing each other's hair she slipped away, taking her equipment with her. She again pressed the button and ran out the front door, ready to walk in to "apologize" running her words through her head. I'll make him regret it.

* * *

Jr. smashed the side of the second officer's head against the window with as much force as he could with his hands cuffed. The first tried to stop Jr.'s violent assault, but he couldn't restrain him. "You stupid motherfucker! You have no idea what the hell you're talking about! I swear to God if you ever talk about us like that again I'll fucking kill you!"

"You're killing him now!"

The second officer tried to cover his face with his arms as the first tried to pull him back. Jr.'s body was heating up, he was passing his limit, he was about to break. He begged for Gaignun to stop him, for anyone to stop him. He kept raising his fists against the man, over and over again, harder and harder. He could feel blood on his knuckles and bones breaking underneath his fists, but he didn't care. He wasn't going to stop, he couldn't stop. He could feel the program building in his chest, flowing through his veins. He had to stop himself! Somebody please! He felt something painful in his neck. The mode stopped, the chemical slowed down. His vision blurred. A...tranquilizer? His fists slowed their attack on the officer as his body grew heavy. His fists collided with the officer's face uselessly as his body slumped forward.

"Gaignun..." he whimpered before the darkness engulfed him.

* * *

Albedo smiled in his victory. He stood, dressed in a formal suit for once, masking his insanity momentarily, just long enough to get Jr. When the hovercar pulled up two officers got out. One bleeding and the other carrying Jr. Albedo smiled wickedly at the boy. So helpless. These fools had delivered him right to the monster powerless. Just the way I like my dragon, Albedo thought. The officers explained what had happened on the ride there, but Albedo didn't care. His only purpose was to get Jr. back now. He gave them generic answers filled with faux platitudes, talking the way he thought Gaignun would because everyone loved Gaginun. Everyone chose Nigredo. All his careful manipulation was going to pay off so very soon. Humans! Government! Laws! Moral standards and systems! All inferior to him! He smiled to the men as he carried his "little brother" off to their new home.

"Sweet, sweet little Rubedo." Albedo said wickedly, "How I have missed you."

* * *

A/N: Well, if that wasn't a bunch of nonsensical soup. XD Oh, and don't worry about Gaignun, he'll be ok. He's too cool to lose to idiots. Ah, why did I just say that? I think I'm starting to worry myself! XD Jeez, what kind of writer am I!? It is totally bedtime! Reviews are my muse to inspire it up people.


	13. Rule of Rose

A/N: I'm so so so so sorry guys. D: I did it again. I tried to write the Albedo chapter and well...I did. CX Haaah! Gotcha! Anyways, this took a little while and I'm sorry it's considered a late update for the way I've been updating. This has Albedo in it. And all his evilness. B/c that's just who he is. CX

Yeah...and regrettably, I have to say and warn everybody that there is rape in here. Yeah, kill me later. But seriously, I don't think Albedo would like it if it was willing. Oh, and b/c of some misunderstanding with Ganon XD earlier (b/c she's usually the first to flock to the updates. XD ). Opaline is a drug that was used in Law&Order: SVU. I wasn't sure if it was real or not, seeing as how I don't really understand its definition, so if it is, cool if it's not aw man. XD Anyway, it was used in a rape case and is apparently Columbian drug used to control people. When given to them, it makes them sort of like zone out and they are extremely easy to control, sometimes going as far as to even make actual motions and follow commands by people who drugged them. There. Done. XD

Anyways, here we go.

I don't own Xenosaga or its characters and that's the reason why I waste my life obsessing over them. C:

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 13  
Rule of Rose

Gaignun held fast against the barrage of questioning, answering inquiries he felt an imbecile could deflect, so when the prosecution played the recording and Gaignun respsonded with a loud, "Goddamnit" his defense attorney quite frankly panicked. Gaignun, however, in a manner smoother than silk, inclined his head toward the prosecution. "You got me." he said, smiling.

"Are you admitting your crime, Mr. Kukai?"

"Yes," he answered focusing his attention on the judges. "My son and I have a very comfortable relationship with each other. Yesterday he took it upon himself to shove a cake in my face and cover the Durandal's residential area with vanilla pudding. As punishment, I made him clean up the mess. Our conversation was so easily misconstrued because of the false evidence you have presented before this court, but if the photos hadn't accompanied it, would you have been so quick to crucify me? If punishing my son is a crime, then I shall gladly go to prison along with any parent who would have done the same." Gaignun's constant confidence and charming nature won him more favor than his actual response and the judges stared at the prosecution as if to blame him for wasting everyone's time. Gaignun hadn't lied about the punishment part either. Jr. had thought he was out of it, but he had cleaned that whole hallway by himself and anyone on the Durandal could testify to that. Confounded and at a loss for words, the attorney shrugged. "The defense rests your honor."

After a few witnesses presented by the defense as a just-in-case measure, closing statements were given and it was time for the judges to deliberate. It took them only a few minutes before they declared Gaignun Kukai not guilty of all charges. Gaignun sighed heavily, the relief almost overwhelming. _Jr., we won, everything will be fine now_, but there was only silence were Jr.'s response should have been. Gaignun put it aside for now, thinking Jr. shut down his link in order to concentrate. He entered the Durandal, tired and eager for the solace he knew his room would provide him. Shelley was waiting for him when he stepped off the transport. "Master Gaignun!" she cried, running to him and wrapping him in her arms. He smiled at her. "Hello, Shelley."

"I knew they couldn't hold you, Master. It was foolish of them to try."

"Yes," Gaignun chuckled, "But they are we never what I would call intelligent to begin with."

He started to pull away from her, when he noticed Mary waiting beside the flat escalator. He frowned. "I need to talk to Mary."

Shelley nodded, "Yes, of course, Master Gaignun."

"But first, where's Jr.? I was told he was going to be given a choice whether or not to come back. I was sure he'd come screaming and cursing and that he'd be here waiting for me."

Shelley's eyes landed on the floor. "Master Gaignun...there's something I need to tell you..."

* * *

Jr.'s head was spinning from what he had assumed was an affect of the tranquilizer. Damn that must have been some strong stuff. His head spun from the chemicals. His vision was still a little blurry, but he could see well enough. He tried to remember what had happened. Something about an officer...Red Dragon Mode...tranquilizer...Ugh! He shook his head, feeling for the first time the prescence of the cold floor underneath. He frowned and slowly pushed himself up. He only made it into a sitting position though before slumping over again and setting his head in his hands. "What in the hell was in that thing?" he said to himself, "That couldn't have been meant for a human." He rubbed his neck and shook his head.

"It wasn't." a voice answered.

Jr. squinted, trying to focus his sight. "Who's there?" Confused and lost he tried to contact Gaignun, but something was obstructing his link. He shook his head. He must've imagined the voice since he couldn't even open a proper link. Man, what was wrong with him? He shook his head.

"It was meant for a monster."

Jr.'s eyes went wide. "Albedo."

Madness echoed in Jr.'s mind like scratching on a chalkboard. He slammed his hands against his head to cover his ears. "Yo, Rubedo." Albedo, smirked, walking from nowhere and everywhere at the same time.

"Did you miss me, dear brother?" There were hands under his chin and blood suddenly on his neck. "Sensitive, sensitive skin, Rubedo. So soft. Nectar from a bleeding flower."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jr. said, struggling to talk from his chemically induced delirium. Albedo loved the sound. "Why Rubedo. That is not way to talk to your new guardian, is it?" Albedo bent down, his face inches from Jr.'s face. Jr. frowned and went to reach for his guns, only to remember he'd left them on the Durandal. "Forget your claws, dragon?"

"You mother-" Jr. growled, grabbing Albedo's wrist and trying to pry it away from his chin. The force that Jr. was applying might have crushed a human's bones, but the gesture only made Albedo laugh. "You're so weak, Rubedo! It amazes me!" Albedo snapped his own wrist in half, leaving a slow Jr. a little stunned. Albedo's left hand grabbed a handful of Jr.'s hair, pulling his neck back and grinning at the pained noise he gave. Albedo smirked at the scene and suddenly his mouth was on Jr.'s, crushing the boy's small body into his own. Jr. fought weakly, pressing his hands against Albedo's chest to breathe. Finally Albedo pulled away long enough for him to do so, but when Jr. coughed in oxygen, Albedo slipped a small vial from one of his pockets and quickly poured the contents down Jr's throat. Jr. balked at the taste and tried to spit it out, but Albedo was on him again, coaxing the liquid down Jr.'s throat and the older boy had no choice but to swallow. "What the hell!? Did you just?!"

"Rubedo, must you always fight me? If you were a good little boy, I wouldn't have to drug you."

Jr.'s body felt heavier now and he shook his head to free himself of it. Albedo smiled at his useless attempt. "Rubedo, so frail, so helpless! What beauty this sight holds. Tell me Rubedo, the infamous Red Dragon, number six-six-six," Albedo lifted him up and carried him from the floor to his twisted throne; the king of madness. "How does it feel to be absolutley powerless?" His laughter rang in the red-head's ears again as his eyes scanned the place, trying to make sense of where he was. The room was a strange one, the inside reminding him of The Song of Nephilim, but the room was decayed with age and something red or purple crawled up the walls, making it seem alive. U-DO?

"It sucks." Jr. answered, surprised at himself. Albedo laughed again. "What the hell did you--"

Albedo threw the limb boy onto the throne. "Opaline. An ancient drug. So many uses out of one little vial and nothing out of this new technology!"

Jr. tried to make sense out of what Albedo was talking about when the man bent over the arm of the throne to place his lips against Jr.'s. "Hm...Nigredo's been teaching you, Rubedo. What other wonders does your temple hold?"

"Get the hell off me!"

"That's right, Rubedo! Feed me with your hate! Burn in your anger! Let me hear it!"

But Jr. was too dizzy, too out of it. He was having a hard time keeping control of anything. His mind whirled and his body remained calm, none of the chemical to awaken his power surfaced, but he kept trying in his weak frustration. He coudn't just lay there.

"You shameless bastard!"

Albedo thought the remark very amusing, his sick laughter bouncing back at them from the infected walls. "Shame!?" he screamed, "Yes! Rubedo, where is my shame?! It all but vanishes the minute I speak your name!"

Albedo ran his hand under Jr.'s shirt, enjoying the disgusted look on his face. He leaned down to run his face against Jr.'s skin, reveling in the resistance of his muscles. He smiled when he came to a small spot on Jr.'s neck where a tiny almost invisible scar existed. His mark. But it was almost gone. What a pity. Albedo took another bite, elicting a hoarse cry from the drugged Jr. "Damnit, Albedo..."

"We abide by the rule of the rose, you and I, Rubedo." Jr.'s stomach turned at the feel of Albedo's tongue on his skin. "Even Nigredo." He continued to explore Jr.'s skin, allowing the drug to settle in his system."

"Black for death. Red for uncontrollable passion." He said, lapping up the blood from the still-leaking wound. "And white for innocence."

"Innocence my ass!

"Oh but it's true, Rubedo." He tore through the fabric of Jr.'s shirt, "And if I'm innocence, then love itself must be pure white. Yes!" he said, insanity in his eyes, "Pure white! Just like sin!"

Jr. fought against the cloud in his mind, trying to fight against the debilitating drug. "I should blame you, Rubedo, or perhaps thank you for this magnificence!" Jr. felt his heart sink. "Thank you for your abandonment!" Albedo covered Jr.'s mouth with his forcefully, once again forcing Jr. to taste the blood on his tongue as he ripped the clothes covering Jr.'s upper body off the boy and threw them onto the contaminated floor. "U-DO?" Jr. asked in his stupor.

"Brillant, Rubedo! My machine! My vessel! Your gift to me! You finally realized!?"

"What are you-"

"Your Executioner is worried about you, Rubedo." Albedo mocked, blood at the corners of his mouth. "What shall we tell him?"

"Gaignun?" Albedo smiled at the anxious way the boy answered him. "That enthusiastic about Death are we?"

Jr. gritted his teeth against the feeling of claws on his chest.

"Such a passion for Death! The Dragon running toward his murder! Let me bring it to you, Rubedo. Let me become the source of your passion!"

Jr. cringed at the droplets of blood on his stomach. Albedo replaced his claws with his tongue, pulling off the rest of Jr.'s clothes in one swift motion. "Call to me, Rubedo."

Jr. stared angrily at the monster and opened his mouth to yell something at him but instead a quiet "Albedo." leaked out of him.

Albedo laughed wickedly at his victory and leaned over his naked body, "Nectar. Such sweet nectar."

"Albedo I swear to God-"

"Meaningless, Rubedo. Threats emptier than promises! Infinite times I have heard those words! Death would rather have you, Dragon."

Albedo loved every moment of this. His gloved hands so carefully separating Jr.'s skin. The crimson liquid that escaped the perfect slits. The disgusted feeling Jr. was having a hard time keeping to himself. It was all too much. Albedo was certain that the drug was working now. With a wicked smile he slipped out of his uncomfortable suit. The fraud in its presence. Jr. couldn't believe where this was going. He forced his mind to work, demanded his very anti-bodies to resist the effect, but his mind was lost and out of his control. Opaline...what the hell was this?! Albedo bent back over his throne, a perverse adult version of himself.

_Is that so, Rubedo? _Albedo asked, climbing into the surprisingly large throne, or perhaps it was Jr.'s small body that made it seem larger. Jr. had trouble focusing his thoughts on anything above get away. Get away. "Rubedo, my Dragon, call to me again."

"Al-Albe..do." Jr. said, disgusted with himself.

Albedo eyes flashed with madness as his lips connected with Jr.'s, his tongue coaxing its twin. "You're mine, Rubedo. Tell me."

"I'm...yours."

Albedo laughed again, moving his mouth from Jr.'s to run them along his neck and chest. He wrapped his arms around Jr.'s slim body and pulled them close so that no space was left between them. "Mmm." Albedo said, "Delicious, Rubedo."

"Fuck you, Albedo."

"You read my mind!' His crazed twin exclaimed in delusional excitement. "Clever, clever, Rubedo."

Jr. felt the Albedo's skin on him, surprised that Albedo's actual hands were normal. He was half-expecting claws. _You're the dragon, Rubedo. _Albedo's fingers glided down Jr.'s arm, stopping at his wrist. Albedo leaned down to Jr.'s ear, his tongue playing with the ring that never left its piercing. "Touch me, Rubedo."

"No, you bastard." But Jr.'s body wasn't his any longer and instead of his screaming mind, it reacted to Albedo's voice. Albedo's smile was pure victory and evil as Jr.'s fingers placed themselves against the pale skin of his sculpted chest. "Why Rubedo. I do believe you're breaking your sweet Executioner's heart."

Jr. tried to force his anger, force his hatred, but the one time he needed his power it wasn't going to work._ Story of my life. _Jr. was still bleeding. Red stained his skin. A mutilated flower, Albedo's heart raced and he bent to lick the seeping essence. "Irresistable." He murmured against the wounds. Jr. winced at the pain that shot up through his spine and rang a dangerous red in his vision. He'd bleed out before Albedo could kill him. _I wouldn't let that happen. _Albedo sent, running a bloody tongue over Jr.'s nipple. _Let me hear you_. Jr. gasped. _Excellent! Again! _Jr. echoed his noise. His mouth was descending down Jr.'s body and the boy prayed to anyone who cared that something would happen. He'd come to his senses. His useless body would wake itself. Gaignun would find him...

_Nigredo can't stop me_. Albedo sent,_ A far more powerless being than even you, Dragon_.

He bit down on Jr.'s hip, basking in the scream that flowed out of him. His hand traveled up to grab at Jr., stroking him slowly trying to get more of the delicious music from his Rubedo. _Nigredo, you should pay attention to this. I know Rubedo better than you ever can. Isn't that right?_ Jr. moaned in involantary response as his body fell under Albedo's control. _Mon Précieux?_

Jr. whimpered under Albedo's touch as his pale fingers slid up and down his length at just the right speed, occassionally pinching the tip just to hear him squeal._ Rubedo, holding back is not allowed_. Albedo sent, turning his mouth from Jr.'s delicious skin to his growing hardness. _He hasn't done this for you, has he, Rubedo_? Jr. didn't answer, trying instead to stop his body's reactions. He cursed everything, screaming to himself to concentrate, wake up and swearing to kill the officers who tranquilized him if he survived this. Albedo pulled Jr.'s limp and unwillingly willing body into a closer position, taking more of him into his mouth, sucking harshly on the tip and playing his tongue against the heated flesh. Jr. writhed against the unwanted ministrations of his demented twin, but he didn't last long and with a strangled cry, he spilled into Albedo's mouth. He swallowed happily, laughing at the flushed Jr. "Poor poor Nigredo. Can you see this?" Albedo leaned over pulling the bleeding Jr. to his lips again, the boy's stomach churned at the taste. "You're mine aren't you Rubedo? Tell him!"

Suddenly, his link was open and his mind sent out a weak _I'm sorry Gaignun _before shutting down again and victim to Albedo's demands. Albedo released him, flipping him onto his stomach and marveling at a new stretch of territory he hadn't realized he'd missed. He traced his tongue along Jr.'s spine, making the boy shiver in absolute disgust. _Let me wash his influence from you, Rubedo. _Albedo sent, madness echoing in Jr.'s mind. Pain shot through Jr.'s body at his rough entrance, not bothering with lubricant and too impatient to worry about preparing him. Jr. cried out in pain, Albedo's favorite music. "Pain! This pain, its so sweet!" Albedo laughed, moving inside his delirious brother. "Such a vital part in realizing one's existance, is it not?!" He thrust harder, causing Jr. to emit even louder noises of hurt. His vision was blurring, his blood loss was dangerous now. He was in so much pain...so much pain... "Albedo! Stop!" He threatened, but there was no power behind it and Albedo only laughed, bending foward to bite at his wounds and grab his hips. "Ah Rubedo, this has never felt so good! Mmmm! Tell me you like it. Admit it, powerless being!"

"I..I li-like it!" Jr. screamed. Albedo's body shook sharply as he grew closer to reaching his peak. Jr. felt a mixture of extreme disgust, anger, sickness, and pain as Albedo came inside him. Jr. cringed as Albedo pulled away. "Rubedo, that was fun." Albedo said, bending down to kiss the boy. Jr. just lay limp, lost in his mind. Albedo's victim.

"You're wrong, Rubedo." he said, placing another lustful kiss against the boy's lips. "I'm the victim of your charm."

* * *

When Gaignun found Jr. he felt his whole world shatter. The boy had been left at the transport gate, a blood-stained white sheet covered his bare legs. The red liquid seemed to be everywhere, pouring from his mouth, his neck, his stomach. The sight almost killed the younger man. He ran to Jr., sobbing uncontrollably and worthlessly. "Jr.! Jr.!" Gaignun screamed, picking him up delicatley. "I'm so sorry, Jr. I-I didn't, I couldn't! Why couldn't I!? Goddamnit!"

He ran to the Durandal's doctor, screaming for assistance. Why wasn't anyone coming fast enough!?"Someone!"

"Gaignun...I'm sorry. I tried to fight..but the tranquilizer...the Opaline..." Jr. croaked. "I'm just so tired."

_**I'm so tired, Rubedo...**_

"No, Jr. You're not tired. You're never tired! You-you've never been tired! There's never been a moment in my entire life that you've been tired! Stay strong, Jr.! Please!"

Jr. blue eyes fluttered open. He sighed, "I'm sorry but I'm so tired. I'm so...tired."

Jr. raised a weak hand against Gaignun's suit, and then with a great sigh, he closed his blue eyes and feel limply into the saftey that was Gaignun's arms.

* * *

A/N: Well, that was a sad one. XD But at least it's the demented Albedo I promised. I promise that the next one will be super fluff to counteract the last few non-fluffy ones. XD I got the idea for this and the name for this chapter from the game Rule of Rose's theme song. The lyrics just fit him perfectly. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people!


	14. Guardian

A/N: Well, here it is. CX It's sort of a long chapter, but we've all been a little fluff deprived so why not? C: My updates might start coming a little slower b/c guess who's caught the swine flu? Santa?! Oh dear God I hope not! D: Well, I don't, but bottom line is I'm sick over here. XD So I'll try to update again tomorrow but who knows? Anyways, here's the next chapter. CX

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters, and we all know that so why do I have to repeat myself? XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 14  
Guardian

Gaignun was anxious, worried, stressed and quite frankly, pissed off. If those damn Federation soliders hadn't come. If the Second Miltian government wasn't filled with incompetence, then Jr. would be ok. They would just be waking up, swapping insults with tender replies. Gaignun got a taste of what it had felt like to be Jr. that day at the hospital, but instead of screaming curse words down an unconcious link, he whispered comforting words and begged him to wake up. He gently rubbed Jr.'s arm, avoiding the bandages and bruises. _Jr., please get up. Please. You look so tiny. I don't think you've ever looked this small before. Isn't that weird? I think you're attitude makes you older to me. Well maybe not your attitude._ _You still have the mindset of a boy, don't you? _He ran his fingers through Jr.'s red hair. _A four foot-seven, eighty-four pound, twenty-six year old boy. We're barely getting by calling you fourteen now. What will we do when you're actually your age in the public eye?_ He watched the rise and fall of Jr.'s chest to make sure he was breathing normally, on edge that something else could go wrong within the next few seconds_. I heard you did a number on those officers. Jr., I told you not to be violent, but when do you ever listen to me? What did they do to make you so angry?_

Curious, Gaignun opened a link, frowning at Jr.'s memories of the hovercar, actually approving of Jr.'s anger but as he followed along with the show that was Jr.'s conciousness he found himself wrapped up in Albedo's words, in his insanity...in Jr.'s pain. Angrily he shut it off. Gaignun had never been so angry in his entire life. A burning feeling that rose and stuck in his chest, in his arms, his whole upper body. He suddenly realized why people punched or broke objects to channel their anger. Suddenly, a loud noise snapped him from his thoughts. He turned his head sharply toward the sound. Jr. was flat-lining. "Shit." Gaignun hissed, he ran through the door and yelled to the first Realian he saw. "You've got to help me. Jr.'s--" But once he had made it back to the room, it was working again. The staccato of beats announcing Jr.'s life. Gaignun sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry. I must've been mistaken." The Realian bowed and left. Gaignun moved toward the left side of Jr.'s bed, arms crossed, frustation in his features. Finally, Jr. couldn't take it anymore. He opened one blue eye and grinned. "Don't you think I'm under enough stress worrying about you?"

"Not really, no."

Gaignun sighed and wrapped Jr. in his arms as gently as he could so as not to irriatate his many wounds. He felt Jr. sigh into the action. "You scared the hell out of me." Gaignun said against Jr.'s neck.

"You curse a lot more." Jr. said, wrapping wired arms around his back.

"You're such a bad role model."

"That I am." Jr. admitted.

Gaignun didn't want to let go. When Jr. was wrapped in his arms like this he could feel him. He could protect him._ You don't need to protect me_, _Gaignun. I can take care of myself..._

Gaignun didn't protest, just held him a little bit tighter. "I was terrified, Jr. I couldn't find you anywhere. We looked everywhere and then...Albedo. I can't believe this happened! How could I have let this happen again?"

"It's ok, Gaignun. We weren't expecting this."

Gaignun hesitantly pulled away to give Jr. space and carefully placed the his tiny lover against the bed. "I'm not porcelin."

Gaignun gave a worried smile at Jr.'s light nature. "I'm sorry, Jr. You just look so...fragile."

So mutilated...

"Nah, don't think of it like that." Jr. said, shrugging his shoulder and wincing at the pain. "Think of me as...as a puzzle that has lost some of its pieces. That's less painful."

"I love you, Jr." Gaignun said gravely, placing a kiss on the boy's forehead.

"I love you too, Gaignun." Gaignun couldn't control the flow of electric happiness that broke through his fog. He hadn't hid it well enough and Jr. felt it too. "You're such a girl."

Gaignun smiled warmly at him and took a seat in the chair beside him. "It looks like we've switched places since the last time."

"Yeah, except you're not swearing and I haven't been out that long...have I?"

Gaignun shook his head, "No, just a day and thank God. I might have gone insane."

Jr. shook his head and winced again. It seemed like every move he made was painful. He frowned at his memories. He was hesitant to see how much damage had actually been done to him, so he asked Gaignun first. "Jr...You're going to be ok, but you're going to be sore everywhere. It'll probably take a little while to heal. There was...so much blood." Gaignun watched as Jr. examined his wounds. He had a large bandage wrapped tightly around his neck that made it a little hard to swallow without pain. Another covered his stomach and chest. Pain shot up his spine and everywhere there wasn't a bandage, a small scrape or purple bruise decorated his skin. Gaignun noticed a change in his demeanor as he continued to stare at his wounds. He had shut down his link, leaving his thoughts to himself, but Gaignun didn't need one to notice the anger in his eyes. Jr.'s eyes traced the scars again. He wasn't exactly sure how to feel so he just settled on hate. He hated Albedo for this pain. He hated Albedo for what he did. Memories flashed through his mind at lightening speed and he shook with anger.

"Such a disappointment, Rubedo." Albedo had laughed, placing his body for Gaignun to find. "I thought it you were prepared, but I assumed wrong." He placed one more kiss almost lovingly against Jr.'s lips. "I'll wait for you, Mon Précieux."

Oh, I'm sure you will. Jr. thought to himself. He lifted his right hand, tracing the number with his eyes. Three prefect numbers stared back. Six-Six-Six. Next time, I'll be more than ready. Gaignun knew Jr. was in deep thought, so it surprised him when Jr. all of a sudden called to him.

"Hm?"

"I said, let me see your hand." Gaignun raised his left hand and Jr. rolled his eyes.

"Not that one. The right one." When Gaignun handed him the other, Jr. smiled.

"You know what I just realized?" he asked, tracing the red numbers.

"What's that?"

Jr. showed him his numbers. "See? We have almost the exact same numbers, right?"

Gaignun nodded. "Well," he said, flipping Gaignun's hand over and placing it over his own palm over palm. "Our numbers overlap. They match. Except for the nine and the six. Isn't that kind of cool?"

Gaignun smiled at the gesture. "Yes, Jr. very cool."

"Hah! I knew it!" Jr.'s grip tightened. "I've found my missing piece."

"Jr..." Gaignun said, at a loss for words. Jr. only smirked. He was good like that. "Bandaged and sick, you continue to make me weak."

Jr. shrugged. "Girls have the habit of fainting whenever I walk by."

"Smug." Gaignun laughed, standing up. "Always so smug." He bent over the bed to kiss Jr. but the boy turned his head away. Hurt, Gaignun pulled back. "Jr.?"

"I-" Jr. answered, turning serious blue eyes on his brother. "I...taste like...I feel like..."

Gaignun's green eyes softened and he brought a hand up to caress his cheek. "Jr. it wasn't your fault. I still love you."

"It's just..."

"Jr." Gaignun said, carefully forcing the variant's attention.

_It's not your fault. You're not disgusting. You didn't betray me. I still love you._

He leaned down again, pressing his lips against the older boys and melting his worries.

* * *

"Master Gaignun, you can't be serious."

"I'm very serious. In fact, I want to talk to Helmer about it as soon as possible."

"But Master, that seems like a very..."

Gaignun grinned at her. "Shelley, what case do they have against me? I want payback for all the hell they put us through. Tell Helmer that I need to speak to him as soon as possible."

Shelley nodded and bowed, beginning an appointment with the secretary Realian. Gaignun left the bridge. _Gaignun! I don't want to stay in here tonight! I want to sleep in our room._

_Jr., you're going to do whatever the doctor says. _

_You know what, Gaignun?_

_What?_

_Fuck. You._

Gaignun smiled and made his way back to the infirmary. When Gaignun entered, he couldn't help but frown. "Heyah...Master Gaignun."

"Hello, Mary."

The blonde girl stood up sharply from her seat and instantly focused her eyes on the ground. "Um..."

Jr. pushed himself up in his bed. "Mary was just here visiting. She came to apologize."

Gaignun only frowned.

_Gaignun._

_Jr. it's her fault. She started this whole thing._

_That's not true, and you know it._

_Jr._

_Aren't you supposed to be the forgiving one? And aren't I supposed to be the grudge-holding one? What's going on? What's happening to my world!?_

Gaignun sighed at Jr.'s response. "Mary, I know you've come to apologize, but right now I need to look after Jr. So please, if this can wait until tomorrow..."

"Oh! Of-of course, Master Gaignun! I'm sorry." She bowed and hurried past them out the door.

"So..." Jr. said, his voice tired. "When do I get out of here?"

"When you feel better." Jr. rolled his eyes. "Can't I sleep with you, Gaignun?"

Gaignun laughed. Jr. blushed, "I-I mean. I'd like a bed that didn't have all these wires as a requirement."

"Jr. you can barely move without pain, there's no way I'm going to risk sleeping in the same bed with you."

Jr. cursed under his breath. "You never get enough sleep."

Gaignun smiled, "You're right and it looks like I'll have to spend tonight without it again."

Jr. frowned. "Well can I at least take a bath?"

Gaignun grinned. "Not without help."

* * *

Jr. was amazingly surprised at how good the warm water felt on his sore body and how wonderful Gaignun's hands felt on him. "This is dumb. I can take a bath by myself." he said.

Gaignun only nodded. "Of course you can, Jr. Now stay still so this will go by faster." But Jr. didn't want it to go by faster and squrimed and fought enough to make Gaignun stop and remove the jacket of his suit. "Jr." he said, only slightly irritated. He rolled up his sleeves to the elbow and grabbed some a bottle of shampoo. "Hey Gaignun?" Jr. asked, closing his eyes.

"Hm?"

"Mary's really upset about the whole thing."

Gaignun made a noise to confirm he'd heard his brother. Jr. sighed, "Gaignun, you're really good at massaging and stuff." He opened a blue eye against the soap that ran down his face and washed away the blood. "Hey Gaignun, are you going to dress my wounds again?"

"No, we'll get a Realian or someone else to do it. I don't want to hurt you."

"You're such a girl."

Gaignun carefully made his way down Jr.'s spine, rubbing his tired bones and sending shivers through his sore body. "Yes, but you love girls." Gaignun rubbed his arms. Jr. sighed at the feeling. "Yeah, I do."

"You know, Jr." Gaignun said, washing the shampoo out of the boy's hair. "You're kind of cute like this."

"You want me to kick your ass, don't you?"

Gaignun shook his head at the ridiculous question. "Was I supposed to say yes to that?"

"You were supposed to realize that I'm going to kill you if you don't stop."

"I used to dream about touching you like this." Gaignun said suddenly. Jr. turned around to look at his brother. "What?" Gaignun smiled and started to scrub more blood off of Jr.'s chest.

"I used to dream about this. I was terrified that you'd figure me out. Everytime you'd take a shower, everytime you'd undress I'd have to force myself to stay in my own mind."

Jr. smirked. "Hah! I knew I was sexy."

"Dangerously so."

"Gaignun...we need to talk about Mary."

"We don't."

"Gaignun, you know how Albedo is. Mary was extremley upset, don't you think she deserves another chance?"

"I was terrified, Jr. I was so scared...The minute Shelley said Albedo I knew what was going to happen." Gaignun focused his green eyes straight into Jr.'s blue ones. "And she...To think that she would actually go that far, it's almost unforgiveable."

"But Gaignun-"

"I could've lost you last night!"

The outburst caught the boy by surprise. Gaignun leaned over, wrapping his arms around Jr. from behind, uncaring of the water that soaked through his shirt. "Gaignun..."

"I could've lost you last night, Jr. Every futile effort, every wrong turn was a constant reminder that he had you. Every little mark (no every mark because there isn't a place on your body right now that isn't ripped apart) constantly reminds me of what he did to you and everything you went through. How you survived it, I have no idea. All I know is that you didn't deserve it and if you hadn't come back I seriously think I might have killed her. No, I would've killed her I know it." It bothered Jr. to hear Gaignun talk like that. It shook some foundation that he'd been standing on, clinging to the world of sanity. Damnit. Was everything as crazy as Albedo now? "Gaignun, you love me?"

"More than anything."

Jr. turned his head slightly to look behind him. "Mary loved you too, Gaignun. You know, Albedo's very convincing to people who aren't used to his nonsensical rants. They don't know how to fight it and he's one of the greatest mental manipulaters in the world. She's a heartbroken girl Gaignun, and now she's swimming in guilt. She had no idea how much trouble she'd actually cause." Gaignun sighed, he knew Jr. was right.

"Of course I am." Jr. said, smiling in that devilish way of his. He leaned up to place a kiss against Gaignun's lips despite his protesting body. "Now don't make me have to talk sense into you ever again." Jr. said, sitting himself slowly back down into the the best bath he'd ever had. "I like it better when you're the girl."

The doctor came to bandage a clean Jr. "Can't I please sleep with my dad, tonight?" he asked in his most innocent voice. Gaignun's lips curled up in the corners just a bit as he fought down a smile at the facade. The doctor, of course, fell for it. "Well, I don't have a problem with it. It seems that your vitals are fine and you're healing surprisingly fast. I don't see why not. Just come back in the morning and we'll change your bandages." He walked over to Gaignun and handed him a bottle of pills. "One whenever he's in pain, two if it's bad, but two might make him a little dizzy." He looked over at the pretending Jr. "And no alcohol while you're on the meds, young man," he joked.

"Oh of course not!" Jr. said, smiling. Gaignun had an especially hard time not laughing at that one and when the doctor left Jr. said "Well you heard the man! Throw out those pills and get me some alcohol!"

That night, Gaignun held Jr. lightly, so afraid to hurt him. "I took the medicine, stupid." Jr. slurred. "I'm not going to feel it. You can hold me tighter than that."

"I'm not going to." Gaignun replied, placing feathery kisses on Jr.'s face. Jr. frowned.

"I want you to." Gaignun couldn't resist that and he tightened his grip only a little bit, but an angry "Damnit, Gaignun." convinced him to hold on tighter. Jr. sighed happily and snuggled into Gaignun's chest. Gaignun held him protectively. It's never going to happen again. He promised himself and as Jr.'s breathing slowed and he mumbled the beginnings of curse words, Gaignun couldn't help himself, opening a tiny link, trying to discover how bad the experience had affected his little lover. _Nope. Not gettin' in there. Go to sleep and stop ruining my dreams._

_Stay out of mine._

Gaignun felt Jr.'s smirk. _I love you, you bastard._

Jr. feel asleep in their light embrace, and once Gaignun was sure he had actually fallen asleep, he opened another link. _Albedo_.

_Executioner? _He answered, _This is new. Having fun with my Dragon?_

_I swear to God if you ever touch him again._

_Go ahead, Nigredo!_ He sent, the crazy laughter that was his trademark flowed through Gaignun's brain._ Challenge my superiority! Threaten my obvious greatness, or you'll be lost in the spell before it's too late!_

_What the hell are you---_

But he was gone again, the signal lost, the wall up and Gaignun looked around in the darkness, tightening his hold on the sleeping boy in his arms. "Let him come for you, Jr." Gaignun whispered, his mind on the defensive. "I'll show him my inferiority."

* * *

A/N: Welp, that was a long one. CX Hope it was as fun to read as it was to write. Reviews are my muse, so inspire it up people. c:


	15. Protect Who?

A/N: Well, I couldn't resist. XD Guess who's addicted to the computer? Me. Anyways, I've updated despite the protests of you, Ganon XD. So hush. No one cares what you think. Anyways...on with the fic!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and seriously, does anybody care anymore? XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 15  
Protect Who?

Rape victims go through countless things. Traumatic nightmares...suidical thoughts...an unbridled revenge complex...and that's why Gaignun was so deeply worried at Jr.'s smile, at his jokes. Albedo had never made it that far and now that he had, he'd expected Jr. to be at least shaken but the boy slept comfortably, never stirring from his position drapped across Gaignun's chest. Gaignun didn't sleep, deciding to take all of those worries upon himself and instead watched over his older brother, unbelievably protective. Light filtered through the closed curtains of Gaignun's office, scaring away the darkness and the constant hallucinations that had accompanied it. It was almost time for him to get up for work. He looked down at the redhead in his arms. Jr. was so small. He'd never get over how tiny he was. He gently played his fingers along Jr.'s tattoo. It was strange to see something like that on a body so young. He sighed gently, wondering how he was going to get Jr. off of him without waking the boy up. After considering all the possibilities and deciding that it was too dangerous a task (and that this was a very comfortable predicament) Gaignun gave up and decided to just wait for Jr. to wake up. It was a few more hours before that actually happened. The clock on Gaignun's desk proudly announced to the world that it was tweleve o'clock in the afternoon when he heard Jr.'s sweet voice whisper through the silence, "Damnit Gaignun."

Gaignun smiled, "And what did I do to make you mad now?"

"You won't give me alcohol."

"You're right, I won't."

"I just want a little bit."

"Well you're not getting any."

"Have I told you I hate you today?"

"No, I don't think you have."

"Well I do." Jr. said, wrapping his arms around Gaignun and rubbing his face into his neck. He took a deep breathe, inhaling the scent on Gaignun's skin. He'd always loved that smell. If someone could bottle that, they'd make a lot of money. Jr. smiled to himself, he'd have to tell Gaignun that later.

"Well in that case, I hate you too."

Jr. started to push himself up because insulting Gaignun just wasn't fun unless you could do it to his face, but instead of a smart insult to prove how just oh so smart he was, an "Ow." escaped his throat.

"Jr.!" Gaignun said, freezing under him.

"I'm ok. I just moved."

Gaignun face turned serious. "Jr. if it hurts that bad, let me give you some medicine."

"No." Jr. protested, frowning.

"Yes."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I want a Mudslide."

"Well you're not getting one."

"And here we come to the centerpoint of our argument."

Gaignun laughed, "Jr. you're not getting any. Now be quiet and take some medicine."

"No." Jr. said, pressing his weight back onto Gaignun. "There, now let's see you push me off to go the bottle. Hah! You won't do it, will you? Nope and you know why? Because I'm porcelin and if you move I just might shatter into a thousand pieces so there!"

Gaignun rolled his eyes and reached for something under his pillow. "You're absolutley right Jr. I wouldn't do that. But as you can see, all eighty-four pounds of you is just absolutley to much for me to handle and I won't ever be able to get up for your Mudslide."

"Hm...you're right, this could be a problem..."

"That's alright because you see, I have a solution." Gaignun's hand emerged from under the pillow, revealing the clear orange bottle that held Jr.'s pills. "I had a feeling these would be used again and just in case you awoke in the middle of the night in pain, I'd brought them to bed with us."

Jr. just stared at the bottle. "Problem solved." Gaignun said, popping the top off and handing a pill to his brother. "Well...I do love translucent orange." He scooped up the pill and swallowed it, frowning.

"I still want a Mudslide." he said, sighing against Gaignun's neck.

The younger man laughed and very very carefully slid out from under his little lover. Jr. frowned at the loss of warmth and snuggled into the blankets. "Where are my guns?"

Gaignun walked over to his desk and pulled out Jr.'s Makarov's and brought them to him. "Aw, I missed these."

"Don't go shooting them all over the place. You're older than I am. Try to act like it once in a while."

"Don't act like a stiff jackass all the time. You're younger than I am. Try to act like it once in a while."

Gaignun bent down to kiss Jr.'s lips lightly. "You're something else."

"And you're a cliché."

"Anything else that you'd like to throw at me, Gaignun Kukai Jr.?" Jr. picked up his medicine bottle and tossed it at his brother, who caught it and sighed. Jr. turned his attention to his silver guns. "Gaignun, I need to see Canaan today. I need to ask him for his help with something."

"Absolutley not."

"Or you can say no and I can go anyway, because that always turns out great."

"Jr., your every move causes you pain."

"Gaignun, please? Look I'll take another pill, go get my bandages fixed and then I'll go see Canaan and come right back. I'll keep an open link for you the whole time. If I so much as breathe the wrong way and you don't like it I'll come right back."

Gaignun frowned at him. Jr. stared up at him through deep blue eyes, grinning like a begging child. Gaignun was thinking about all the bad things that could possibly happen to his poor little Jr. Albedo could come back, a random man could pick him up, the ground he walked on could explode under him. _And Santa Claus could suddenly go on a killing spree and murder the stellar system's little girls and boys._

Gaignun's eyes sparkled with amusement, while his frown remained plastered on his face.

"Have I ever told you that you should have your own cologne?"

* * *

"Rubedo." The specialized Realian said, monotone at Jr.'s arrival.

"It's Gaignun Jr. now. Gaignun. Jr."

Canaan nodded in his I-don't-care-about-anything way as Jr. walked over to him. "Tell me, Rubedo" ignoring the cringe from the boy. "What have you come here for? You're interrupting my very important work."

Jr. crossed his arms and tried not to wince at the pain that motion caused. "Very important work? You mean sitting around in the U.M.N. Control Center getting checked up on everyday because your mind is useless?"

Canaan returned to the computer he had been working at. "If you want help from me, then I expect the insults to stop soon."

Jr. nodded and walked over to him, slamming himself down on the desk, trying to keep his image of unbreakable and holding in the pain the action shot through him. "Well, can you help me or not?"

"Depends on what you're asking, Rubedo."

"Ugh! Jr.! And here." Jr. handed him one of his Makarov's. The Realian looked at it for a moment, turning it around in his hands. "And this?"

"It's a Makarov, don't pretend you don't know. I need this to have the same functionality and and fire power as the Desert Eagle .50."

Canaan raised an orange eyebrow at him. "Planning on blowing up the Kukai Foundation? And if you need something with more firepower, then why don't you just get a new weapon? Perhaps something from the fourty-eigth century?"

"Oh, you know me. I love ancient relics and besides these are sweet guns and Gaignun gave them to me so I'd rather not just throw them out. Can you help me or not?"

"I can." Jr. rolled his eyes.

"Ok, I'm sorry, will you?" Canaan looked over at the gun.

"Alright." Jr. smiled happily and pulled the other one from his pocket. "But only if I will be allowed to call you Rubedo."

Jr. frowned at Canaan's sly smile. "You don't even--fine."

Canaan took the other one, while Jr. pouted and pushed himself off the panel.

"How fast can you have this done? I have a feeling I'm going to need it soon."

* * *

"You can't be serious."

"Very serious. What ever happened to that man anyway?"

Helmer sighed, "He was in the hospital for a little while claiming brain damage? I thought that was a little unlikely."

Gaignun thought back to what he had seen from Jr.'s mind and made a face, "Maybe not too unlikely, but I don't think that matters right now."

Helmer nodded, "How is he?"

"Alive."

Helmer laughed, "That bad, huh?"

"I have to fight him to take medicine, but he'll be fine in a few days. That doesn't change the fact that none of this would have happened if..."

"You're absolutley right. What do you want?"

Gaignun sat up slightly, "Well, I want a public apologizy denouncing all of the conflict that happened. I don't want a detailed report of what happened to Jr., I just want it known that he was hurt out of my care. If I don't get that, then I'll have to take these matters to a higher court."

Helmer nodded. "That doesn't seem unreasonable. I'll get on it as soon as possible."

"Thank you, Helmer."

"Hey, anything for an old friend. You two have grown up so fast."

"You sound as if you were my father." Gaignun said, smiling.

"Haven't I been one?"

"A damn good one." He answered.

"You've been hanging around him too long."

"True. He's an infectious disease."

Helmer smiled. "Take care."

Gaignun nodded as the image of Helmer melted into a thin line and vanished. He leaned back and sighed. What a stressful last few days. He could feel the beginnings of a headache starting around his temples and he bent over to rub the painful spots. He could feel himself getting dizzy and started to wonder if he'd hit his head earlier. He tried to shake himself free of the feeling. _You make it seem as if you never had a father._

Confused, Gaignun turned around at the voice, only to find that no one was there. He shrugged, maybe this headache was a lot more than a headache but he couldn't remember hitting his head. Laughter? A smooth voice? _You have a father, don't you unit six-six-nine?_

_Yuriev!_

_Nigredo._

"Aw, am I missing out on this Ménage à trois?" He felt a strong hand around his throat. "How rude of you to not invite me, Nigredo!"

The voice was gone with the tightening hand around his throat. "Weren't you going to show me?"

Albedo said into Gaignun's ear. "Your inferiority?" The hand that was around his neck exploded and Albedo's laughter rang throughout the room, but Gaignun didn't give him time to regenerate, and the room was filled with the noise of exploding limbs and crazed laughter. "Why Nigredo, we can play this game all day, but I don't think you're going to win. Be a good sport and quit while you're ahead."

"Why don't you?"

A sharp ringing sound rang in Albedo's ears. The noise was so strong it was debilitating and even he buckled under the sound, covering his head with his hands. "Did you really believe that..." Albedo choked out. "I'd leave you alone with my dragon...executioner?"

Gaignun picked up his chair to smash it into pieces against the white monster when Albedo suddenly vanished. Caught momentarily off-guard, he stood there dumbly with a chair raised over his head. Albedo was suddenly behind him, the chair was gone and instead of the older variant, it struck Gaignun and knocked him to the floor. He tried to push himself up, but Albedo was on him, pressing his knee into the back of his neck. "You shed that skin, did you Nigredo?" Gaignun struggled to gain enough concentration for another link. "That's right, you did. A new skin for Yuriev, isn't that right?" There was a sharp clicking sound and the feel of steel against his skin. "Can you feel him, squirming around in your conciousness? When he breaks through, what will happen? Death for the Dragon! Too bad you can't regenerate." Albedo laughed, "Yes, such a shame!"

"You brought him here!" Gaignun growled, "He's---You've---"

"Infected you?" Madness again, "Yes! Of course! For I am his ghost! But if I am his ghost what does that make you? A corpse! His corpse! Yes, his dead vessel, just awaiting its day of judgement!" Gaignun couldn't form a link, couldn't concentrate...

"But I am the rector. Speak your peace, sinner! I won't allow you to hurt Rubedo!"

"Huh! Hurt me? I was about to say the same thing to you." Albedo felt a barrel against his back. Jr. smirked. "First Sakura, now Gaignun and I think you tried to kill me just a day ago."

Albedo laughed viciously. "I'm glad to have been a part of this partie à quatre. Such a turn this day has taken! But surely I must depart! Farewell, Rubedo."

Jr. smirked, "Sayonara, baby."

He fired, and the bullet exploded against Albedo's white cape, disenegrating him in an instant. "Don't worry for Nigredo, Rubedo." his voice echoed. "I'll take good care of him."

Then he was gone. Gaignun was up instantly. "Jr."

Jr. gave him a tired smile. "Hey." he said. He took a step forward,flinched and started to fall, but Gaignun caught him. "Who's protecting who again?"

"Jr. that was stupid of you."

"Right. I'm sorry. Next time, I'll let you die."

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah. Running from the U.M.N. Control Center wasn't fun though. I think I've split a few scabs. Ow."

"Let's get you to the doctor."

"Nah. I'm ok. What about you?"

Gaignun frowned. "You're right. His control over the link is getting stronger."

"Hah! I told you!"

Gaignun frowned. Had Albedo sent Yuriev's voice to confuse him or was it...

---------

"Nigredo, come here." Yuriev had said, extending his hand toward the frightened boy.

Gaignun could remember the feel of the locked door behind him, the feeling of being trapped. "No!" he yelled, pulling a gun from his pocket. "I'm abandoning my mission!" He pointed toward Yuriev. "I won't follow your orders! Anymore!!"

---------

"Gaignun? Gaignun!" He shook his head. Worry was plastered on Jr.'s face when their eyes met. "I'm fine. I'm sorry. What did you say?"

"I said that you're bleeding."

Jr. tapped his right ear and when Gaignun checked, he found he was right. "Hm...I feel ok. It must've been strain."

Jr. frowned. "You'd make me go to the doctor for that."

"You're right, I would." he answered, kissing his lips. "Speaking of doctors..." Gaignun said, gently lifting Jr. into his arms. "Wait, Gaignun, there's something I need to tell you first."

Gaignun nodded. "It's all well and good that you're so worried about my bleeding to death..." Jr. said, shifting his weight in the younger man's arms. "But I think you should be more worried about my blood alcohol level, which you will be sure to find is dangerously low."

"Jr." he laughed, "Sometimes I wonder about you."

Jr. smiled as they made their way from the room. "Sometimes I wonder if you really do love me. Now get me some freakin' alcohol!"

* * *

A/N: Oh no! D: Yuriev!? What's going on?! I'm so confused!...that's exactly what I would be saying after reading this chapter. XD Anyways, reviews are my muse so inspire it up people.

Oh, right there's a crack in here about a picture I found on deviantart that just killed my soul in the best way that a soul can be killed. I don't know the artist personally, but I wish I did b/c this picture is great. But no matter how many time I try to past the link it doesn't work. --; but I'm pretty sure if you were just bored and wanted to see it, typing in Gaignun Kukai on deviantart will make it pop up. Really ? Are you really doing this to me? --;

It's just hilarious. XD Done. You can leave now. C:


	16. Insistance

A/N: Guess who has no life and spends all their time on the internet? You. XD That's right, you. Do you really have nothing better to do? Go read a book, go ride a bike, eat a vegetable! This is ridiculous.

No, really. I appreciate the attention. C: Thank you all very much. *totally bows*

As we all know, I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and yes this is a big disappointment on my part.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 16  
Insistance

"Sweet!" Jr. exclaimed, grabbing the cane in excitement. Gaignun was surprised at his enthusiasm over the small wooden object.

"Don't you see, Gaignun? Now I'll be just like Hugh Laurie!"

"You'll be like who?"

Jr. rolled his eyes, "Hugh Laurie! House! I'll limp around in a pissed off mood and make people bow to my genius!"

Gaignun tilted his head to one side. "That's what you do everyday. Except without the limp and the making people bow to your genius."

Jr. threw the wooden cane at Gaignun, who caught it and twirled it around his fingers. "This is supposed to help you get around. I don't want you tearing any more scars like the last time."

"I'm fine now!" he protested angrily. He stomped his way over to Gaignun who was signing papers in one hand and twirling the cane in the other. Jr. wrapped his arms around his brother. "I'm fine now, really."

"I believe you." Gaignun replied, dropping the cane.

"Then I can have-" Jr. started, but Gaignun cut him off with a passionate kiss. "Of course you can have a kiss, Jr." He said, pulling away from the dazed boy. "You know you don't have to ask."

Jr. frowned. "That's not what I was gonna ask, asshole." he grumbled, picking up the cane and walking away. "Ugh this is annoying. Shouldn't I get something like a hoverchair? Aw, sweet! That'd be great!"

"Jr. the last time you were in a hoverchair, you broke Hammer's arm, ran over Tony, and almost killed chaos."

Jr. shrugged, "Psh. They were asking for it. Get out of the way means get out of the way and chaos wasn't almost killed, just slightly maimed."

Gaignun nodded as way of dismissal and started back on his paperwork. "Nevertheless, you like antiques. You're probably the only person in the world that still knows what House is. How you have copies of all the seasons is beyond me, but you should never have started watching House or anything involving Clint Eastwood to begin with. They're a bad influence on your impressionable little mind."

Jr. laughed, "Oh come on, you loved Gran Torino! Admit it!"

Gaignun shook his head, never looking up from his work. Jr. sighed and walked to the long pool table located a few feet in front of Gaignun's desk. "Huh, we haven't played this in a while."

Jr. said, tapping the cane on the green felt. "Wanna play?"

Gaignun shook his head and Jr. crossed his arms in frustration. "Ok, so let me get this straight. Gaignun Kukai Jr. isn't allowed to have a hoverchair to ride around in. Gaignun Kukai Jr. isn't allowed to walk without a cane because he might fall and explode in the middle of the hallway. Gaignun Kukai Jr. isn't allowed to have any fun until he's completley healed because his father is an up-tight, paranoid jerk. Am I right?"

"That about sums it up." Gaignun answered, opening a drawer and placing a mountain of paper in it before closing it again. Upset that he wasn't getting any responses out of Gaignun, he turned his attention to the pool table, patting the edge to see how strong it was. He nodded to himself in approval. He picked up his cane, feeling the wood in his hands. Pretty sturdy. Yes, wonderful worksmanship. Indeed. A harsh thwacking sound made Gaignun jump. He jerked his head up from his paperwork. "Jr.?" He stood up to get a better look in the direction of the noise. Jr. sat on one corner of pool table, half of a wooden cane in his hand, the other on the floor. "Gaignun?"

"What in the world did you just do?"

"Had fun." he said, shrugging, apathetic. "It only lasted a second though."

Gaignun got up and walked around his desk to examine the damage done to the pool table. A large dent the exact width of a cane was embedded in the woodwork. He sighed inwardly at the loss and ran a finger in the dent. "Jr." he whined.

"And this is what happens when I've been cooped up in the same room for three days straight."

Gaignun placed a hand on the boys chest and pushed him down onto the table, ignoring the pained expression. "If you're well enough to ruin pool tables, then you're well enough to be punished for it."

"And what the hell are you going to take away from me? My oxygen? I mean, I haven't been allowed to do anything in the last few days so I don't know what I could possibly be forbidden from!"

Gaignun leaned over him in one fluid motion. He gathered Jr.'s small wrists in one hand and placed them in a tight grip above the boy's head, sliding the other arm around his waist. "I've been thinking," Gaignun said, bending low over Jr. and pressing his body on top of the boy's.

"About what you said, about disciplining my son." He ran his nose along the line of Jr.'s jaw, noticing the increase in his brother's heartbeat. "He's just proven to me today what a spoiled little brat he is. It is...something I hate to admit, but I don't think I've been a very good father after all."

"You're-you're right about...about..." Jr. stammered, trying to figure out what to say in response, but Gaignun's lips on his throat suddenly made him forget that he could speak and he willing submitted. "What do you suggest," he asked, biting gently at the bottom of his neck, "Jr.?"

He squirmed helplessly under Gaignun, caught off guard by the sudden advance and the feeling rising in his chest. "I suggest you let him go before we have another...incident."

"Hm..." Gaignun said, quietly mulling it over. "I think I'm willing to take that chance."

"Really? Well I don't think I am." He wriggled uselessly, "And besides, you just barley got away from being a labeled a pedophile for the rest of your life! Now isn't the time to prove everyone right!"

Gaignun sighed, "You're the oldest. So, in retrospect, wouldn't you be the pedophile?"

"Nuh-not physically!" Gaignun moved his hand from Jr.'s waist to the back of his neck, pulling him closer. "Shut up and tell me you love me."

Jr. was about to unleash an angry protest, but Gaignun saw that one coming. Jr. was so predictable. He placed a rough kiss on the boy's lips, shattering his concentration and his hold over the tough exterior he was trying to keep intact. Jr. struggled against the hand that held him and when Gaignun finally released him he wrapped his arms around him fiercly, pulling him down to get as much of the man on top of him as he could. There was a knock at the door and a voice, "M-master Gaignun?" Mary. Gaignun pulled away, sighing heavily at the interruption. "Well, go answer it." Jr. snapped.

"Maybe they'll leave?"

Jr. frowned, "You're going to make her hate me."

"Alright. Come in!" He said, gently helping Jr. up from his position and bending down the pick up the remains of the wooden cane. Mary came in, hands behind her back, eyes to the floor. "Hi Mary!" Jr. said, waving at her.

"Hey, Little Master." she said, a little bit of her old glow coming into her face.

"Well," Jr. said, jumping down from the pool table. He grimaced at the landing and looked up at the younger man. "I'm getting out of here." He saw the frown starting to form on Gaignun's face, "I won't get drunk I won't run away. I'll just head over to the bridge and maybe actually do some work. You've got a handful since I've been sick..."

"You never do work. Even when you're healthy."

"Is that the point? No, no it's not." Jr. said.

_You have your guns?_

_Yes. _He sent, walking out the door_. Behave yourself, "Master Gaignun"._

Gaignun smiled at the image of Jr. leaving and threw the wooden chunks into a trash can before taking his seat. "Ok," he said, with a forced smile. "You needed to talk to me?"

She nodded, but kept her eyes on the floor. "Master Gaignun I..." she started but stopped, unsure of what to say. Gaignun tried to make himself polite and forgiving despite the fact that she'd caused the whole catastrophe. _No she didn't_. Jr. sang.

Gaignun sighed. "Mary, just talk to me. "Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you."

She smiled a little and took a deep breath before saying, "Master Gaignun I love you. I...love you so much and I just...I cain't believe it." She shook her head. "I've been with ya'll a super long time. I don't understand how I didn't see it before, I guess 'm just that stupid, huh?" She played with her fingers and looked up at him for a brief second before continuing. "Well, Master Gaignun...I'm very very sorry. I didn't know how much trouble...I just...I wanted you to miss me, but...I don't know."

She fidgeted nervously and made a small noise in the back of her throat. She tried her hardest to hold it back, but she just couldn't and Gaignun noticed the silent tears that were making their way down her pretty face. He stood up suddenly, surprising her. "Master Gaignun?" He didn't answer, just wrapped her in his arms. She broke down and melted against him, sobbing uncontrollably. "I don't know how to respond to this, Mary I really don't. I can't believe you'd do something like that to me, not after all we've been through. If you loved me why..." She started crying harder, her slim body shaking from the weight of her tears. He held her tighter, "He could have died, Mary. The officers that took him away from us tranquilized him before Albedo even got to him. He was so sick from all the drugs in his system when he was back...there was so much blood...I can't..."

"Master Gaignun I--" Gaignun placed a finger against her lips and smiled.

"I understand why you did it. But you must understand how hard something like that is for me to forgive. Please, this wound is one that won't heal. I can't forgive you." He saw her face scrunch up into what he knew was despair. The look didn't fit Mary's personality. "But..." he started, keeping his smile, "I don't want to hold it against you. It's something that is now in the past. I need to know that I can trust you again. Can I Mary?"

"Yes, of course Master Gaignun!"

Gaignun smiled. "Good. I'd love to have you stay here with us here at the Kukai Foundation, Ms. Godwin."

"Oh, Master Gaignun!" She cried, throwing her arms around him. "Thank you so much."

* * *

Gaignun was exhausted and as he stared at his finished work and glanced over at his clock he demanded to know just how in the world paperwork could be this time consuming and mentally exhuasting. Where did all this paperwork come from again? Hell. Yes, that's right. The very fathomless depths of Hell. He leaned back in his seat. Jr. was right, he never left the room. It was strangley quiet without the rambuncious redhead running around breaking things or shouting insults. It was starting to get late, he should be back soon. Gaignun opened a link, just to make sure.

_Jr., where are you?_

_I'm on the bridge_. He sent back, sounding tired.

_Why are you still there?_

_Shelley and I are trying to integrate a new program for Mama in here to keep the security on the Quaritine Hangar in check._

_Come back soon, you need to be asleep._

_Said the man who tried to rape me._

_I believe it is quite impossible to rape a willing body._

_What about my mind!?_

Gaignun smiled to himself. _What about it?_

A string of obscenities flooded their link as Gaignun closed it. I love that boy. Gaignun thought happily. He started to get ready for bed, cleaning up the mess of clothes that Jr. had (of course) strewn all over the floor. I'll kill him one day, he swore. I really will.

_Oh really? I thought you abandoned your mission_. A ringing sound filled Gaignun's mind. He shook his head, thinking he had imagined it again. _Oh, no. I'm very real. Say hello to me, Nigredo. It's been so long._The ringing grew louder, screaming in his ears. He doubled over, grabbing his head in his hands._ I killed you, you bastard. You're dead! I-I_

_Saved Rubedo? Please, Nigredo. You were never the hero. You are the executioner._

Now pain. Sharp, piercing pain. _What the hell do you want from me!?_

_You know what I want. _A hissing voice, venom. _Grant me access, Nigredo._

_Find another body! This one belongs to me!_

With a fierce cry and a sharp explosive pulse, the voice stopped. He collapsed to the floor, trying to clear his breathing and his vision. _Fight me if you must, Nigredo. I will get you eventually_.

* * *

A/N: Welp. Done. CX Yeah, not a great ending but I felt like it was a good place to end. And no, it has nothing to do with the fact that I still have unfinished math homework. Reviews are my muse, so inspire it up people!


	17. Gaignun?

A/N: WHOOOO! Another update. CX I'm sorry it's sort of late, but my updates are going to have to be a little bit slower now with more math homework and an senior project. --;

Really school? Jeez, being a senior sucks butt.

Oh, and Tuahla or whatever, let me just say: Shut up. I hate you, don't love you. Why you're addicted to this story I have no idea, but I love the fact that you are so I can hold it against you. XD You are stupid and I want everyone to realize and consider that when reading your reviews.  
But despite this, this chapter is yours. You wanted man sex, you got it. CX

Anyways, on with the fic!

Warning: Yes, dare I say, there is a lemon in here. XD  
I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and that's a good thing to, seeing as how I don't have time for them anymore. --;

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 17  
Gaignun!?

Gaignun was sitting on the side of his bed, head in his hands, eyes to the floor. His suit jacket was off and hanging on the back of his new chair. He sighed a week had passed since his last dangerous Yuriev encounter and he was starting to get worried. He never knew when his prescence would appear or what might happen. He could slowly feel him gaining power, like a progressive cancer, eating away at his control. His laughter haunted his dreams, his voice existed in every dark corner of the night but he was determined to control him and so far, he'd been able to. Once he felt him there, probing his mind for that one piece of control that would gain him a new body, Gaignun shut down the link and forced him down mercilessly back into stasis, back into his subconcious where he had been hiding for the past fourteen years. It was extremely exhausting and troublesome, but he could do it. He had to. For Jr. He was doing just that when Jr. walked into the room happily singing some nonsense or other, a box twice his size in his hands. "Hey Gaignun!" he yelled from behind his box. Gaignun only stared at the ground. "Gaignun? Are you here? I can't see anything."

"Yeah, I'm here." his voice sounded strained. Jr. frowned and placed the heavy box on the floor.

"What's wrong?"

Gaignun shook his head and winced slightly from the severe headache assulating him. Worry flooded to him from Jr.'s end as the boy walked over to sit beside him. "Tell me. Did something happen?" Gaignun grimaced and shook his head.

"You're lying to me."

Gaignun shuddered visibly, alarming the redhead. "Gaignun, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing." He lied, smiling at his brother. "What's in the box? An array of expensive explosives?"

Jr. grinned, "Hah! I wish! Check this out." The boy got up and scrambled to the box, jumping up to rip open the top, but he was too short to actually dip into it and pull out its contents. Frustrated at the world, he ran to Gaignun's new desk chair and pulled it over hastily, glaring at Gaignun when the man attempted to do it for him. "Stupid! It's a surprise, idiot."

"I think I've had just about enough of your surprises." Jr. ignored him and delved into the box.

"Jr., did you carry that box in here all by yourself?"

"Nope. I carried it in here all by myself."

Gaignun sighed, "You're still injured, you could--"

"Explode. Yeah, yeah. The galaxy is aware of the many ways it can kill me. I'm pretty sure it would pick something a lot more interesting than bleeding out, don't you?" Jr. pushed himself back up. "Ok, look. I know we don't have anymore room for these, but you're going to have to make some room for them." Jr. started pulling out books in armloads and placing them gently onto the ground. "Jr.! How heavy was that box?!"

"Gaignun!...Shut up! Look at all of these! Classics! Herman Mellville, John Gardener, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Joseph Conrad, Mary Shelley, Shakespeare, Emily Dickinson...and guess who else?"

Gaignun smiled at his brother's enthusiasm. His only passion greater than his guns. "Who?"

Jr. pulled out a small black book and ran to his brother, jumping over the pile of literature that he had already stacked and plopped down on the bed. "Milton." Gaignun's eyes lit up.

"No way." Jr. smiled at him.

"Remember when chaos and I skipped...or I skipped work to walk around in Second Miltia? Well I found this amazing store. It's made out of wood, Gaignun! Wood! It was awesome! I'll have to show it to you sometime! Anyway, Shion's brother owns it and when I started looking around I found all of these. chaos wouldn't let me take them that day, so I snuck out today while you were busy and brought them. I practically bought the whole store! And when I found this." He grinned, holding it up for him to see. "I just had to get it for you."

Gaignun took the book in his hands. The book looked old and worn, but the minute he opened it, he could tell it hadn't been touched, the pages still in crisp perfection. He remembered this book. Jr. had read its beginning to him while he was in the hospital all those years ago, but they had lost it somehow. "Paradise Lost." he said, smiling at Jr.

"Yep." he beamed, taking it away from his brother. "I thought maybe we could finish it together."

"Well this," he said, bending down to kiss his lips, "is a fantastic surprise."

Jr. nodded, "I knew you'd like it." Gaignun was so delighted at his present that he had almost forgotten his splitting headache until it started up again, ringing dangerous and red in his ears. He bent over again. "Gaignun?"

"I'm just feeling a little sick." he said shaking his head of the evil influence wracking his body.

Jr. frowned. "Well then, why don't we go to sleep?"

Gaignun nodded and Jr. got up to press a button on his desk, turning the lights off. "Ow, shit!" Jr. said, tripping over something. "You ok?"

"Yeah. This is ridiculous." Gaignun heard Jr. stumbling and cursing loudly before an angry swish of the curtains allowed light to filter into the room. Moonlight poured in, illuminating the floor and sending Jr.'s profile into a sliver silhouette. Gaignun sighed at the image. Beautiful. Jr.'s eyes sparkled brilliantly through the silver as he made his way back to the troubled man. Gaignun thought he heard something like the beginnings of mocking laughter. He shook his head again and it was gone. Jr. frowned. "You need to relax more. Sleep or something." Gaignun waited until his brother was just a few inches in front of him before wrapping him in his arms.

"Or something." He planted tender kisses along the boy's neck.

"Jeez Gaignun, I thought you were sick."

"I feel better now."

"You can't just--" Gaignun covered the boy's mouth with his own, reveling in the small noise he recieved.

"Oh, I think I can." Gaignun said, kissing him again. Gaignun couldn't believe how fast his body relaxed. How his mind and all the stressful thoughts that had kept him sleepless and paranoid for the last week melted by this simple interaction with this little boy. When he pulled away he heard a small sigh. "I'll never be the super cuddler that your girls were."

Gaignun laughed at this and wrapped him in a hug. "I'm not sure if I want you to be like that."

"So you don't mind?"

"Mind what?"

Jr. groaned, clearly frustrated. "I'm not a very romantic person, Gaignun!" he blurted out thankful for the darkness.

"Huh?" Gaignun asked, surprised. He pulled back to get a look at his brother.

"Sometimes...sometimes I feel like I'm just not good enough for you. I mean, have you seen me? I run around like a maniac, I blow up stuff, I run over people and laugh about it, I spend money on useless things, and while all of that is just absolutley hilarious and a wonderful quality to have in an older brother...I don't think it's the kind of thing you'd want in a...in a...um..."

"Lover?" Gaignun asked, finishing the offensive word for him. Jr. only nodded, keeping his blue eyes on the ground.

"And...isn't that what you want? Someone who's super affectionate and pretty and soft and well, girly? Like Mary or Shelley? Don't you ever miss them?" Gaignun only stared at him, confused. "I don't know..." he finally shrugged.

Gaignun smiled and gently lifted the boy's chin so that he would look up at him. "Have I made you feel that way, Jr.? Or is this a fabrication of your own making?"

Jr. squirmed and frowned at him. "Why would I miss them when you're all I'll ever need?" An mixture of emotion flowed to him from down the link. He leaned down happily, their lips mere inches apart. "You're all I've ever needed."

Jr. closed the distance between them, throwing his arms around Gaignun's neck and crashing his lips into Gaignun's with such a force that it sent him falling onto his back. Jr. landed with him, pushing himself up from the younger man's chest.

"Gaignun..." Jr. whispered, unsure of what to say but the urge to say something, anything was burning in his chest. Gaignun ran a hand up the back of his neck, finding his way into his red hair. He sighed at the boy, basking in the mixture of feelings and Jr.'s urge to form words. Didn't he realize Gaignun could understand without them? With a loving smile and with the most tender voice he could muster he leaned up and whispered, "Shut up and tell me you love me."

Jr. smirked, "I love you, bastard." He bent down the rest of the way, placing his lips against the man's. Gaignun melted into the feeling, trading his stress and worries for this momentary slice of heaven. He felt Jr.'s hands on his neck, trying to get rid of the tie that was so perfectly wrapped around his throat. Smilling at the sudden anger flashing down his link, Gaignun moved his hand to remove it for him. While he was busy, Jr. started on the buttons. Jr. couldn't stay patient for long and decided that Gaignun could always buy another shirt, so with one swift motion, he ripped the front open, sending buttons out into the darkness. Gaignun started to protest but Jr. silenced him with a kiss.

"Shut up." he whispered, moving his lips to travel down his neck. Gaignun was surprised at how forceful Jr. was being with him, but he wasn't objecting to the attention. Jr.'s mouth worked furiously on him, nipping and sucking in just the right places and earning him shaky moans as Gaignun's mind tried to process the pleasure shooting through his body. Jr. ran his tongue over a nipple, pleased at the needy sound he had caused. "I didn't know..." he whispered, running his mouth lower, "that you were so submissive." Gaignun only answered with heavy breaths and pounding heartbeats as Jr. busied himself with the annoying belt around his hips. Jr. had never exactly hated his short stature until this moment. It made everything so much harder, but Gaignun didn't seem to mind as long as Jr.'s tongue kept swirling small circles into his skin. Quickly, so that Gaignun wouldn't have time to recover, Jr. jumped off of him and pulled off the rest of his brother's clothing. Gaignun got up to help, but his body was already bare and before he knew it he was assulted by an onslaught of warm lips against his own. "Stay." Jr. said against his mouth. He pushed his brother back down, stripping off his own clothes and throwing them carelessly into the darkness. He pounced on his brother, crawling up his body in an almost feline way, sending shivers up his spine and giving him the feeling of a hunter trapped by his prey. _And you should feel that way._ Jr. sent, as he bit down on the man's chest. Gaignun shivered at the lust behind the message. Jr. planted himself on Gaignun's stomach and leaned up to nibble on Gaignun's ear. "Jr..." he moaned.

"Gaignun" he answered. Jr. continued to bite his brother's sensitive ears as he reached a hand behind him to trace the tip o his fingers along Gaignun's swollen member. He groaned at the gesture, squirming in a way that he never did when he was in control. He felt Jr. smirk against his skin before he wrapped his hand around the appendage, moving lightly and teasingly. "Jr." Gaignun pleaded, involuntarily thrusting into the too-light grip. "Hm? I'm sorry, Gaignun. I can't hear you." Gaignun groaned and raised his hands to intwine his fingers loosely in his brother's short hair. "Jr." he moaned again, louder. Jr. released him, much to Gaignun's dismay, and reached for the lube hidden under their bed. He quickly took his position again, squirting the substance onto his hand and gripping Gaignun again, sliding his hand up and down the length. "Ah, Jr." he moaned, placing his fingers into the boy's hair again. Jr. bent down again, capturing Gaignun's mouth in a lustful kiss, coaxing Gaignun's tongue with his own. _Oh God, Jr._

_You can just call me God. I like the way that sounds._

Gaignun was getting close, he could feel it in the way his hands desperatley pulled at his small frame and unconciously sent incoherent thoughts down the link. He let go of Gaignun and awkwardly positioned himself over him. "Jr..." Gaignun gasped, the worry in his mind more evident than the need in his voice.

"It's been over a week." Jr. breathed, kissing him quickly. "I'll be ok."

He took a deep breath, bracing himself before finally sliding down onto his brother, taking him in all at once. Jr. hissed slightly at the feeling and Gaignun forced his body to stay still while Jr. adjusted. It didn't hurt as much as it had the first two times and it didn't take him long to get used to the intrusion. He moved slowly at first, moving his hips to try out his new position. Gaignun's hungry moans urged him on and soon he was lifting himself up and down on his brother. "Ah! Jr.!" Gaignun choked out, moving his own hips in time to meet the rise and fall of Jr.'s

"Gaignun...more..." he whimpered, and he complied, moving faster and wrapping a hand around Jr.'s arousal, shaking with electric pleasure at the sound of Jr.'s voice. "H-uh! Jr. I'm---I'm!" Gaignun's voice came out in broken syllables as he came, Jr. close behind him, spilling onto his stomach before collapsing onto the bed beside him. The two men lie there for a moment, exhausted. Gaignun looked over at his little wonder. "Damn, Jr."

"I know. I'm good, right?" he said, a small smirk on his tired lips.

Gaignun smiled lovingly at him. Jr. returned the gesture, sending warm feeling through their link.

_So what was that talk earlier about wanting someone girly?_

Jr. closed his perfect blue eyes, the smile still on his lips. _I just wanted to make sure. You know, before I proved my point._

_And your point, _Gaignun asked, turning over onto his side and taking Jr.'s hand in his.

_That you're a girl._

_I love you, Jr. _Gaignun said smiling and wrapping him in the emotions trapped in his chest. Jr. blushed slightly.

_I love you too, Gaignun._

* * *

Jr. walked down the halls of the Durandal in good spirits the next day. He was finally healed and Gaignun had seemed a lot better this morning. With his permission, Jr. had decided to run around the ship aimlessly for a few hours.

"You've been trapped in this room for a while. You can go out and play." he had said, putting on his clothes. "Just take your guns and promise me you won't get into trouble."

Jr. smiled to himself. Had he really expected him to keep that part of the bargain? He practically skipped down the halls, basking in his freedom. Somewhere along the way, he found MOMO, who was more than eager to spend her day with him.

"I don't know." Ziggy had said, his eyes on Jr. almost threateningly.

"Oh come on, old man. What's going to happen?"

"There's a very high probability of you getting MOMO into some sort of trouble or mischeif while you're out today. I'm not sure if you're a very good influence on her."

"Oh, come on Ziggy. Please. I haven't seen Jr. in a really long time. Pleeeeease?"

Ziggy raised one yellow eyebrow and Jr. knew by that look that he was going to get his way. "Ok. For a little while."

"Oh thank you, Ziggy!" MOMO exclaimed, wrapping the cyborg in a hug.

"Yeah, thanks old man." Jr. said, winking. He grabbed MOMO by the arm and whisked her down the hallway. He spent the whole day with her, just making her laugh and making up for lost time. "I heard on the news about Gaignun." she had said, surprising him.

"Yeah, whaddya think?"

"It's true, huh?" Jr. blushed.

"It wasn't...not like that."

MOMO smiled, her golden eyes sparkling. "I think it's cute." Jr. laughed.

"Of course you would, MOMO. You're too sweet." It was MOMO's turn to blush.

"Now." Jr. said, taking her hand and placing a water balloon in it. "Let's get on with that bad influence that old man was talking about."

After drowning Mary and a few 100-series with water balloons, it was time for MOMO to return to her father figure. "I was honored to spend the day with such a beautiful lady." Jr. said, bowing and kissing the back of her hand. She giggled. "And I was honored to spend the day with such a beautiful boy." She curtsied and they both laughed.

"You're lucky you're so pretty." he said, smiling.

"I guess I am." She winked at him and disappeared into her quarters, the door shutting between them. It wasn't all that late and Jr. had a lot of free time. After checking the integration at the bridge, he walked back to his room to help Gaignun with his left over paperwork. "Guess who's actually going to do some work today!" he sang as the door opened and closed at his arrival. Gaignun sat hunched over on their bed, his head in his hands, just as he had been last night. When he didn't get an answer he sighed. "What? Is today Ignore Jr. Day? Why wasn't I told?"

Gaignun continued his silence and Jr. frowned. "Hey, Gaignun, is something wrong?"

Gaignun's body shook violently all of a sudden and Jr. ran to him. "Gaignun, what's wrong?"

He opened a link and tried to dig through his conciousness but it was blocked. "Gaignun?"

There was a heavy sigh from the younger man as he raised troubled green eyes. "Jr." he said, quietly.

"Yeah? What is it?"

Gaignun swallowed past a lump in his throat. Jr. came to sit beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Tell me."

"Jr...listen...I think...that you should sleep in your own room tonight."

The suddenness of the statement shocked him. "Huh. Tired of me already?" he joked, but the comeback was too slow and the playful scarcasim wasn't there.

"I'm sorry Jr. I'm just sick."

"That's ok, Gaignun. I don't mind. That won't bother me." his hand tightened on the man's shoulder. "You're always a burden, I'm used to it by now. I won't mind taking care of you."

But the green-eyed man shook his head. "I really think...it's for the best."

Jr. tried to hide how confused and hurt he was by this. He stood up, without a word, walked to the door and left.

It felt so weird in his room. He didn't like it. It was too empty. He hadn't even been in it since its reconstruction and it just felt like a strange place. He sighed and pulled open his closet to see what was left in it. Gaignun had brought some of his clothes and stuck them into his closet, so he wasn't sure exactly what was left. He found some old pajamas and thought about putting them on, but just decided not to. He was sure he wasn't going to sleep. He laid down fully-clothed on his bed and stared at the ceiling. What had he done wrong? He tried to think back to something he could've done wrong last night, but Gaignun had seemed so happy...This didn't make any sense. He sighed at a new feeling in his chest, one a lot different than last night's. The longer he spent in his room that night, the more restless he became. Why woudn't Gaignun just talk to him? Was it something so upsetting that he couldn't share with his own brother...his lover...? A sinking feeling settled in Jr.'s heart as sudden realization hit. Could he have fallen out of love with him? Jr. shook his head and ran a hand through his red hair. How could someone be in love one night and out of love the next? His thoughts continued to torment him until he coudn't take it anymore. He pushed himself up and walked out the door. He was going to ask Gaignun and Gaignun was going to give him a straight answer.

The halls were eerily silent tonight, or maybe that was just because the sound of Jr.'s heart threatening to break deadened any other sound. When he reached Gaignun's door he took a deep breath, preparing himself for whatever lie on the other side. After a moment of mental preparation, he stepped in. "Gaignun?" he asked, his voice sounding hallow in the dark room. He hated the way the darkness in this room cast everything into an eerie other dimension. Strange how he'd never noticed the effect before. "Gaignun?" he asked stumbled his way to Gaignun's desk in order to turn on the light and find his brother. He finally found the desk and fumbled under its surface for the button. The lights snapped on in a flash, blinding him momentarily. "Gaignun." he sighed in relief when he found him. He was standing in front of the curtains, seemingly staring out at the moonless night. "Gaignun, what's--"

"Gaignun? Who's Gaignun?" The man asked.

He turned to face him. A blonde man with light blue eyes shaped out of Gaignun's features stared at him. An antagonizing smile covered his lips as he spoke. "Well, well. It's good to see you again, Rubedo."

* * *

A/N: Whooo! That was a looong one. CX I'm sorry for such a ridiculously late update, but here it is. Hope it doesn't disappoint. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people.


	18. Nigredo

A/N: Well now. Guess who this is. XD Now, let me explain about this chapter. I thought it might be important to go over what happened in Gaignun's past before we actually got into the whole Dmirti's in my mind! D: Deal. XD Anyways, this chapter's sort of long and might be boring, but it'll pick back up next chapter.

I do not own Xenosaga and never will and therapy has helped me realize this. Now I can move on. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 18  
Nigredo

"Don't leave me, Rubedo."

"Quit being such a wimp."

"I'll be scared."

"You're ruining the game!"

"Nigredo!"

Nigredo gave the quarreling twins a soft smile. "Rubedo, just let him hide with you."

"Buh-but that defeats the purpose! We're supposed to hide in different places, that's what Sakura said. That's the whole point of hide-and-seek. If Albedo and I hide in the same place, it won't be fun because you'll find us both at the same time."

"I can't hide in one spot by myself!" Albedo interjected, "What if I get lost or you can't find me?"

"You know how to get back to the institution." Rubedo snapped.

"Rubedo." Nigredo threatened, crossing his arms and raising a black eyebrow at his brother.

"Hey, I'm the leader! I get to make the decisions!" Rubedo barked, but when Nigredo tilted his head to their sensitive brother, the variant sighed. "Ok. You can hide with me. Just don't make it too obvious where we are, ok?" Albedo nodded enthusiastically and followed his brother.

"Wait, how long am I supposed to count?"

"Til you get to one hundred!"

Nigred folded his arms against the wall and buried his face in the blue fabric of his uniform. He counted aloud and when he finished he frowned. What was he supposed to say? Ready or not, here I come? Something to that effect. He just shrugged._ You have to say it! _Rubedo sent. He sighed and made his way out of the institution and into the garden. "Ready or not, here I come!" he called. Nigredo sighed. He was never going to find them. The garden was enormous. There were so many places for them to hide. He started to search anyway. Knowing them they would probably start fighting and give away their position. He decided to just lightly stroll, enjoying the sun's warmth and the surprisingly beautiful day. He walked the plastic path, past the monument Albedo would eventually explode against, past the hole in the bricked off section of the park where the demented boy's practice graves would be dug. But that was later. Right now, everything was perfect and as uncomplicated as a bioweapon's life could be. He sighed as he made his way around, not seeing them as he passed through the garden. He made his way backwards, back to the main entrance thinking that Rubedo tricked him and had actually hid inside the institute instead of in the garden as promised. "That sounds like something he'd do." he sighed to himself. He was almost to the door when he saw a girl leaning up against one of the floating monitors. "Unit number six-six-nine, correct?" she asked. Nigredo stopped and nodded. She montioned with her head for him to come over. He had only seen her once, but he wouldn't forget was the missing number, number six-six-eight, a variant just like him. Her name was...Citrine, right? He walked slowly and hesitantly, but she flashed him a small smile and he couldn't help but smile back. He was closing in on her when she suddenly turned serious. "You're just like us." she started, fixing him with her hazel eyes.

"Like you?" he asked.

She pushed herself away from the monitor. "Codename: Red Dragon. A useful, yet dangerous creature, with the potential to lose control. Our duty is to manage and subdue the Red Dragon's violent nature." He only stared at her, confused. She apparently, had expected this and began to explain, "Don't you think its strange? The way you don't react to the U-DO simulator?"

His eyes widened at the realization. He had noticed, and it had bothered him a lot, worried him to the point of feeling absolutley useless and powerless compared to his brothers. It had never occured to him that he might have some other purpose.

"You don't mean..."

"That's right. Red Dragon. Red and precious."

As if on cue, Nigredo heard Rubedo scream, "Albedo, that hurts! Stop it!"

"I didn't do it! You hit it on your own!"

"No I didn't! That was your elbow, I know it was!"

"No it wasn't! It was the branch! I told you to stay still!"

"No you didn't! That was your elbow!"

"Nuh-uh!"

"That is it!"

A tree beside the main doors rustled roughly and the twins feel out on top of each other, wrestling furiously. The two variants watched them for a moment before Nigredo cleared his throat. The twins stopped and stood up. "Aw, I told you he'd find us." Albedo grumbled.

"It was your fault!" Rubedo said, unwilling to let his loss go.

"Well, well, speak of the Devil." Citrine said, mocking the redhead's number. Nigredo felt uncomfortable about the way she said it and he watched Rubedo's temper flare. A low growl from deep in his throat erupted at the pun, but it was Albedo who defended him. "Don't talk about him like that!" he hissed.

Citrine only shook her head. She was superior to them. She didn't have to listen to anything they had to say. Albedo was still shaking with anger at her remark, but Rubedo's hand on his shoulder brought him back. "Don't bother, Albedo. She's not worth it." Albedo nodded, flashing one more angry glance at the girl before turning to the doors, following Rubedo. The redheaded boy stopped when he noticed Nigredo wasn't behind them. "You coming, Nigredo?" he asked. Nigredo looked between his brothers and his sister, shuffling his feet uncomfortably.

"I'll catch you two later. I need to talk to Citrine."

Confused, and feeling a little betrayed, the two went into the building, leaving Nigredo with his sister.

The next few months when he wasn't in the simulator or with his brothers he met with Citrine to learn of his actual purpose. It felt good to be a part of something and not just stand back in the shadows. He loved his brothers, but they were almost a seperate being. They lived in their own world where Nigredo was alien. With Citrine, he experienced what they shared. They had the same purpose, the same goal. The only problem was that he wasn't exactly certain just what his purpose was. Citrine had said something about managing and subduing Rubedo, but he did that almost everyday, Albedo too. It wasn't that hard so he didn't understand why she insisted on studying him. One day, when the two met, Citrine had a suprise for him.

"We're going to start our training today, Nigredo." She said, leading him back into the building.

"Training?" he asked dumbly, running to catch up with her.

"Yes. We're meeting with Dr. Yuriev today. He wants to speak to you specifically."

Excitement filled the bioweapon. Their father never actually met with any of them. Sure, to give orders or announcements from time to time, but no one was ever asked for specifically. He felt like a lowly serf, getting invited to a ball hosted by the king. He tried to contain his emotions, but Citrine saw right through him. She smiled. "Yes. I assume he doesn't spend time with you Y types. There are only eight of us, so I can see how much more difficult it could be to spend time with six hundred and sixty-six of you." Nigredo frowned at how cold Citrine was. He had a hard time trying to decide why she was so intent on being so rude to everyone, but finally gave up when he realized there wasn't a reason. That's just how she was. They walked down a corrider, the walls pure white and constantly giving Nigredo the impression of a hospital. They turned right and walked through a door and into a room Nigredo had never seen before. The walls had computers pressed against them, just like every other room in the institution. But that didn't matter. What mattered to Nigredo was the figure standing across the room at a computer, talking to a lab technician. When he heard the sliding of the door he turned around. Nigredo's heart found its way into his throat and he held his breath.

"Citrine." He said, surprising Nigredo with his deep, slightly raspy voice.

"Dr. Yuriev." She answered, inclining her head in his direction. "I have brought unit number six-six-nine, Nigredo as you requested."

The man smiled and walked over to the boy. Nigredo froze, afraid of displeasing his father with his presence. Dmitri leaned down and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I've been looking forward to this day, Nigredo."

"Uh...Father?" Nigredo started, unsure of what to say. The lines around his eyes crinkled as he smiled at the boy. "The day that you begin your training."

Nigredo smiled happily, green eyes sparkling. "Yes," Dmitri chuckled. "You'll do fine."

Nigredo spent his days on and off with his brothers now, creating a sort of rift between them, but not one so big as to tear them apart. He spent his breaks and afternoons with his father, listening to his inspirational theories and his predictions for Nigredo's future.

"Nigredo." he had said to him one day while walking around the institute."I need you to study them. You're brothers. I need detailed reports on their behavoiral patterns. Can you do that for me?"

Nigredo nodded admiration in his voice, "Of course, father. I can do that." He was always more than eager to please him and completely naive to the situation.

His training had mostly consisted of learning to control his mental link, how to enhance his telekentic abilities and render enemies helpless simply by using his mind. Sometimes, when she was around, he and Citrine would spar, learning to fight hand-to-hand combat. Nigredo had never known he was so agile until then, as he learned weak points and just how to time his every move.

"I'm very proud of your improvement, Nigredo." Dmirti told him one day after a session.

"Really?" Nigredo asked, clinging to his father in a way that reminded him of Albedo.

"Of course." he nodded, smiling. "You've always been the good son."

He was walking back from a session with his father, happily considering his prospects when Citrine stopped him in the hallway. "Hello, Citrine." He said, smiling at her.

"You can't be friends with them anymore." She said, her features stoic as always.

"Friends with who?" he asked, confused. She jumped him, pressing him against the white wall, her face remained expressionless as she placed her lips against his in a forceful kiss. Nigredo pushed her off, disgusted and surpised. "What in the world, Citrine?!"

A sly smile covered her lips. "Why do you think Dr. Yuriev keeps us in separate wards, Nigredo?"

Nigredo frowned at what she was insinuating and pushed past her hard in a manner very unlike him. "You can't stay friends with them. Just let them go, Nigredo."

Nigredo walked into his room with a sigh. He shared a room with his brothers in order to separate the variants from the simple units. Their room was a small one, just enough for three beds. Rubedo sat on his bed in the middle, reading a book out loud to his younger twin who sat in anticipation on the floor, looking up at him. They both moved their head as the door slid open and shut behind him. "Hey Nigredo!" Rubedo said, smiling. "We're reading Frankenstein."

"Yeah! We're at the part where he's describing the monster...ew!" Albedo said, jumping up and down excitedly.

"Wanna listen?"

"Sure, why not?"

He sat on the floor beside Albedo who gripped his arm. "It's pretty freaky, this monster thing." the boy said, shivering. "Stay right here Nigredo in case I get scared, ok?"

Nigredo nodded as Rubedo began to read again. "Oh! No mortal could support the horror of his countanence. A mummy again endued with animation could be so hideous as that wretch. I had gazed upon him while unfinished; he was ugly then, but when those muscles and joints were rendered capable of motion, it became a thing such as even Dante could have concieved."

Albedo squeezed Nigredo's arm in excitement. "What I've never understood is how he didn't know it was going to be ugly. I mean, he's the guy that put the pieces together. He knew his skin was going to be all translucent and stuff, right?"

Rubedo thought about that as he marked his place and shut the book. "Well...maybe he just didn't think about the actual outcome or result of his work." Rubedo shrugged.

"What do you think?" Albedo asked Nigredo.

"Well, he was so consumed with his work, driven by a strange desire that even he almost couldn't describe. I don't think he ever really expected to be able to create life and so it scared him."

Albedo shrugged. "The whole idea scares me."

"Rubedo, was that really a good idea? It's close to bedtime and now Albedo's frightened."

Rubedo rolled his eyes. "Well he can just sleep with me if he wants to. It's not like he doesn't every night anyway."

"I-I can sleep by myself!" Albedo defended, letting go of Nigredo's arm and walking to his bed against the far right wall. Nigredo gave Rubedo a disappointed look, but the boy only shrugged his shoulders and placed the book under his bed. Nigredo waited until his brothers were situated before turning of the lights and making his way to his own bed. "How was dad?" Rubedo asked sarcastically.

"He's fine, so kind of you to ask." Nigredo said, matching his brother's tone.

"What about that girl?" Albedo hissed. He hated girls, they took his brothers away. Nigredo grimaced. "She's...strange. She kissed me on my way here."

He heard the rustle of sheets as Rubedo pushed himself up. "She what?!"

"That stupid girl!" Albedo yelled, "I'll show her!"

"Albedo, Rubedo, don't worry about it, it's not a big deal."

"Well she'd better stop!" Albedo threatened. "We need you for the simulator. She needs to leave you alone."

Nigredo frowned, they didn't need him. "Yeah, Nigredo. What do you do with dad anyway?"

Nigredo had been told not to discuss this with his brothers. "They wouldn't understand." Dmitri had said.

"Nothing really," he lied. "A whole bunch of computer work. I think he's trying to teach me in case something goes wrong during our actual U-DO encounter on Miltia."

It wasn't a good lie, but it was good enough for Rubedo and the boy settled back down. "We miss you, stupid. We can't play anything because Albedo's afraid to be alone."

"Be quiet Rubedo!" he snapped.

"Plus the fact that we can't stop fighting for two seconds without you to calm us down."

Nigredo smiled. "I miss you guys too. I'll see if I can skip a couple of days so we can all run around together."

"Sweet."

"Cool."

Nigredo smiled. "Goodnight guys."

The two said their goodnights and the room was silent. Nigredo's mind whirled with all that had happened recently, wondering what Citrine meant by her words and why the hell she'd decided to kiss him. He was in the middle of his debating what he should do about her when he heard the bed beside him move. "Rubedo..." Albedo's weak voice whispered. He heard a sigh and the rustle of blankets. "Nigredo was right, that was a bad idea." he whispered to his white haired twin.

Albedo shifted closer to his brother, hiding his face in his chest. Rubedo wrapped his arms around him to keep him from being afraid. "I've got you. Go to sleep now."

* * *

Nigredo convinced his father to let him skip a few days of training, claiming that he needed to spend more time with his brothers to report on their behavioral patterns. After their simulation for that day they were running around the garden again, playing tag since Albedo wouldn't dare be separated from Rubedo for a second. Albedo was running away from the redhead, looking behind him both to see how close his brother was and how far away he was getting when he tripped over something. He landed hard on his shoulder. "Ow." he hissed angrily, turning around to find the offensive object. What he found surprised him. "Rubedo! Rubedo!" he cried, picking it up and running to him.

"Are you ok? Did you get hurt?" Rubedo asked, checking him for scratches.

"Hush, Rubedo. Look what I found!" He showed his object to him and Rubedo gave an excited cry as Nigredo caught up with them.

"What is it?" He asked. Rubedo turned around, his blue eyes sparkling. He moved to the side so that Nigredo could get a better look. A small black and white kitten was wrapped in Albedo's arms. It looked up at him through light green eyes, a small mew sounded as it shifted in the boy's arms.

"It's so cute! Can we keep it, Rubedo? Huh? Please!" Albedo asked, petting gently. Rubedo smiled an obvious Hell Yeah on his lips, but he stopped. He turned toward Nigredo and stared at him. "What do you think, Nigredo?" Nigredo knew what he meant by that question: Are you going to tell Dad? Nigredo felt a little hurt by this, but smiled anyway. "I think it's a great idea."

Rubedo's smile was dazzeling as he nodded and petted the small creature. "What are we going to name it, Rubedo?" Albedo asked.

He tilted his head in thought. "I don't know." he said, shrugging. "How about...Gaignun?"

"Yeah! That's a great name!"

"Well, let's get this little guy into the institiution," Nigredo said, looking around.

"We'd better hurry before the someone sees us."

They took the kitten into their room to hide him. "Where are we going to put him?" Nigredo asked, looking around in their small room.

Rubedo shrugged. "We can just lock the door when we're not in here. We'll shove him under the bed when someone comes in."

"Did you hear that little Gaignun? You're going to live with us now!" Albedo said, rubbing his face in the kitten's fur.

"I don't know if I like the word shove in association with such a small creature." Nigredo laughed.

"Well fine. We'll gently place him into the space under the bed. How's that sound?"

"Better."

"Jeez, Nigredo." he said, elbowing him playfully. "You always have to so up-tight?"

"You always have to be disorganized?"

"Yes. Yes I do."

Nigredo laughed. "Well then, I guess the same goes for me."

The days ticked by and Nigredo continued reporting to Yuriev. He watched Sakura's death and Albedo's downward spiral, paying close attention to Rubedo's reaction to every little thing. As he watched, he found himself worrying more and more about his brothers. He had been afraid of Albedo's sudden weakness and disintegrating mentality. He had been absoultley terrified of Rubedo's reaction at Sakura's death. It was strange how so many disastrous things to bring them closer. He worried for them all the time and slowly he began pulling himself away from Dmitri in order to look after them. Dmitri didn't like the idea and decided to fix the problem. One day Nigredo was sitting on his bed, reading a book alone in his room. Gaignun was curled up in his lap, a fully grown cat now. He purred and wrapped his tail around Nigredo's arm. Nigredo laughed. "You're too cute, you know that?"

The cat meowed in agreement and climbed up to lay on his arms and distract him from the book. Nigredo sighed. "I thought cats were usually distant and apathetic."

Gaignun meowed again and bit at his uniform playfully. Nigredo was trying to remember where Rubedo had put the cat's toy when the door to their room suddenly flew open. Nigredo didn't have time to hide the feline before Dmitri walked in. "Nigredo. How have you been, son?"

Nigredo moved his book and uselessly pushed the cat behind him. "F-fine, father." he replied.

Dmitri raised eyes flashed behind his glasses.

"What is that behind your back?"

'Nuh-nothing, Father."

"Nigredo, don't lie to me."

"Hey!" Rubedo's voice sounded from outside the door. "What are you doing?"

Dmitri turned his head to find a suspicious Rubedo staring angrily at him, Albedo behind him.

"I've been informed that you have been harboring a wild animal. I've come to confiscate it."

"You can't do that!" Albedo snapped.

"Nigredo, bring it to me." Dmitri motioned for him to come. Nigredo stared back at him for a long time before summoning the courage to say, "No."

Dmitri frowned. "Nigredo, be a good son and bring your father the animal."

Nigredo waited, trying to gauge his father's reaction if he disobeyed again. Finally, very slowly he pulled the startled cat from around his back, got up and handed him to his father. Dmitri smirked at his victory, turned and left.

"Why did you do that?!" Albedo screamed, running to his brother. "What the hell were you thinking?! He's going to hurt Gaignun!"

Nigredo seemed shocked. "No he won't. We just won't have him anymore."

"Do you really think he's just going to give him away?!" Albedo yelled, tightening his fists. Nigredo hadn't thought about that, not once. He looked over at Rubedo. The boy only shook his head and turned around, a sad sigh sounded from him.

Later that night when they were all asleep or supposed to have been, he heard the sound of Rubedo's bed creaking and the sound of the door opening and closing. Nigredo turned over. Albedo lie in Rubedo's bed alone. Worried, Nigredo got up to find him. It took a while, but he finally found him. The boy stood outside of the institution, far away from the main doors. He sat on a bench staring into the empty window where Sakura's empty piano sat in the darkness. "Rubedo." The boy looked up at his brother.

"Hey," the boy responded, his eyes still lingering over the darkness.

"Mind if I...?"

"Go ahead."

Nigredo took a seat beside his brother. They were silent for a moment before Nigredo spoke. "Rubedo. I'm so sorry. I didn't know what else to do."

Rubedo was silent, the long pause slowly murdering him. "Rubedo?"

"It feels like everything's falling apart, Nigredo." he said, suddenly. There was another long pause before he spoke again. "I don't know what's going to happen anymore. We keep getting hit with so many things. I don't think I can take much more." He looked down at his right hand. "I know I'm the leader but...I'm starting to wonder if I should be." He dropped his hand and returned his attention back to the black window. "I've lost Sakura and I know it wasn't Albedo's fault, not really. He can blame himself if he wants to, but I just want him to snap out of it because I can feel him slipping away too." He sighed deeply and closed his eyes against the dark blue sky.

"Nigredo." he started, opening them again to focus his deep blue eyes on him. "Promise me that no matter what, you won't leave." Nigredo's heart jumped in a strange way he'd never felt before.

He grabbed his brother's hand. "I promise, Rubedo. You don't ever have to worry about that."

Rubedo smiled. "Thanks."

"No problem." Nigredo answered, returning the expression.

"Hey guys." The two turned sharply at the voice. Albedo stood, tears in his amethyst eyes and nervous tension in his entire body. "I-I woke up and no one was there. I told you not to leave me!"

Rubedo got up instantly. "It's ok, Albedo. Don't cry."

Albedo threw his arms around his brother. "Everything's going to be fine now." He said to the sobbing boy. "Right Nigredo?" Nigredo stared at the two for a moment, taking them in. His brothers, his friends. He'd never betray them again.

"Right."

* * *

It was time for the air strike. The first air strike on Miltian soil. Their encounter with U-DO. Rubedo was ready, Nigredo could tell it in his posture, in his confidence, in the way he winked at his brother and shouted obscenities. Albedo was frightened. He clung to Rubedo and called to Nigredo to stay close to him. He was nervous, but as long as he had Rubedo touching him and Nigredo close, he would be ok. Nigredo was alert. He watched everything carefully, threatening one thing to go wrong in his world or attempt to hurt his brothers again. He was going to prevent it. He saw Citrine out of the corner of his eye. Why she was coming, he didn't understand, but it didn't matter. As long as she stayed far away from him and his brothers he couldn't be more uncaring. But she didn't, walking over to him and pulling him away from his angrily protesting brothers.

"Dr. Yuriev wants to see you." She said, smiling in a way that made him sick.

"I don't care." He answered.

"You don't have a choice." She responded, pulling him along roughly.

"It's almost time for the strike, shouldn't we go?"

"We will arrive on time. First you must talk to Dr. Yuriev."

When they entered the room it was dark. It was hard for him to see, but he could make out the shapes of workers and Dmitri in the corner. One of the shadows grabbed his arm and dragged him away from Citrine into the middle of the forming semi-circle. Nigredo pulled away, but another arm grabbed him. "What are you doing?!" Nigredo said angrily, thrashing in the arms that held him.

"Nigredo, it is time." Dmitri emerged from the darkness, placing his hand on the boy's black hair. "Time for what?!" The boy asked, struggling. A worker dropped to the floor, clutching his head and screaming. "Nigredo, stop fighting." Another technician fell.

"Nigredo." Dmitri said harshly. He grabbed the boy's chin and forced his green eyes to look into light blue ones. "Do you know you're purpose Nigredo?"

"To manage and subdue the Red Dragon."

Dmitri shook his head, "Is that what Citrine told you?" He looked off into the shadows where Citrine stood, waiting. "Such a clever girl." Dmitri said, smiling in her direction. His grip tightened on Nigredo's chin. "You were created for me." he rasped.

"What?" Nigredo asked, confused.

"I've been alive for hundreds of years, Nigredo, jumping from body to body and this one is getting old. You are my vessel and it is time to give in to me."

Nigredo fought viciously, dropping more and more technicians while others arrived from thin air to hold him still. "Then what was all that training for?!"

"You are very special, Nigredo. You have two purposes in life. One is my vessel. The other is to destroy the Red Dragon. You were created to kill Rubedo."

"No!" Nigredo screamed.

"It is true. The Red Dragon has split into two, it would seem. Albedo will also have to go, but I assume you knew that already, didn't you?" Nigredo slipped his arm out of someone's hand and elbowed the body hard in the ribs, sending it to the floor and creating a new body hold him still.

"I've trained you well it would seem by the dropping numbers. It is so much easier to have a body and mind already conditioned to combat, don't you agree?"

"I won't let you do this!"

Dmitri sighed, and straightened his glasses. "You don't have a choice."

Nigredo fought and threw the men holding him down. He ripped Dmitri's hand away from his chin and ran for the door. When it didn't slide open, he tried to force it open with his hands, but of course, it wouldn't work. Laughter behind him made him shiver in his skin. He turned back to face what he felt was his inevitable doom, fear building up in his chest. He stood, with his back pressed against the door, praying to whatever god was real that it would open and he would be free. "Nigredo, come here." he said. He outstretched a hand toward the frightened boy, that damn smirk on his face. His mind raced. He had to do something, anything. He couldn't let this man hurt his brothers. He'd promised. "No! I'm abandoning my mission!" he yelled. As if by reflex, he reached into his back pocket and pulled the standard pistol all U.R.T.V's were given. He pointed it at his father, emotions flooded through him so complex he couldn't describe any one of them. "I won't follow your orders! Anymore!!"

Time seemed to slow down. The gun fired as if on its own, hitting Yuriev and sending him down. Someone screamed, people ran to the scientist. Then as if that had been the key to the door, it opened and he ran. He ran blindly, trying to comprehend what he had just done. He felt like his lungs were going to explode, but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything. He tripped over something and fell forward onto the plastic ground. He lie there, uncaring. It didn't matter if they found him. It didn't matter if they killed him, threw him in prison. Nothing mattered anymore. His existence was worthless. He'd destroyed the man who'd created him and he absolutley refused to hurt his brothers. What could he do but lie there? What could any being who denied their existance do? "Nigredo." The boy looked up sharply, his grip on the pistol tightening. Albedo looked down at him.

"Why?"

"Rubedo sent me to find you. We're leaving."

"Did you--" Albedo nodded, his eyes grave. Nigredo broke down, sobbing on the plastic and dropping his gun. Albedo bent down, looking at his younger brother curiously. "I-I didn't know what else to do! Did you hear him!? He was going to kill you! Kill Rubedo! What--"

Albedo placed his hand on Nigredo's shoulder. "Nigredo, what will you do now?"

He cried harder, shaking his head. "I don't know..."

"You will come for him, Nigredo."

"What?"

Albedo's eyes turned serious. "You won't be able to stop. It is your purpose. How long do you think you can deny the sole thing you were created for?"

"I won't!" Nigredo said, pushing himself up. "That's why I killed him! I won't have to do it anymore! I can be free! I can control myself, Albedo."

"Do you really think so, Nigredo?"

"I know! Albedo, I know!" Nigredo's sobs captured him, shaking his body. "Don't tell him, Albedo. Please don't tell him."

He buried his face in his hands. "He'll hate me. Don't tell him."

Albedo embraced his brother, trying to calm him down. "I won't."

"Albedo..." he choked, "What am I going to do?"

Albedo rubbed his brother's back. "Rubedo wants us to escape. He wants to leave after the U-DO encounter. We'll be ok. Just follow him. He's our leader."

Nigredo couldn't help but be amazed at how sane and in control Albedo sounded. He had been so frightened only moments ago. "Brothers stick together, Nigredo. We'll be ok."

"I hope so, Albedo. I really hope so."

"Beware the sins of the father, Nigredo." Albedo whispered, holding him in an almost threatening grip. "Lest you become the executioner."

* * *

A/N: Well, glad that's done and over with. XD Next chapter will continue where chapter 17 left off so it'll be back to our adult (or most of them) characters. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people! C:


	19. Dmitri

A/N: Well next chapter up and ready.C: The poem at the beginning of this chapter is from Coleridge's Ancient Mariner. Never read it myself, but for some reason, it reminded me of Gaignun. CX Now, let me explain about where this chapter starts to fix any confusion. The beginning is Gaignun's view of what happened during chapter 17. Some of the dialouge is familar, so if you're confused a first, you'll probably realize the timeline by the time you get there. ^^; Sorry for the confusion. Anyway, on with the fic!

I do no own Xenosaga or its characters and like Ganon XD's Jr. Lamb. I believe the knowledge has put me into a coma. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 19  
Dmitri

Like one who, on a lonley road,

Doth walk in fear and dread,

And, having once turned round, walks on,

And turns no more his head;

Because he knows a frightful fiend,

Doth close behind him tread.

* * *

Gaignun couldn't believe how happy he was. His whole life had been consumed in darkness. But every dark corner of it was illuminated by this little boy. His brother, his comrade, his tiny dragon. He looked so perfect like this, his claws gone, completely vulnerable and bare, purley Rubedo. He sighed. Maybe he was a girl. Gaignun bent his head a little to kiss the boy. Jr. smiled at the action and opened his eyes.

"Well good morning Mr. Kukai." he said, leaning up to kiss him.

"You're in a good mood."

"Want me to be in a bad one?"

"Never said that."

"Didn't answer the question."

Gaignun adopted Jr.'s devilish grin and pushed the boy onto his back. He bent down to kiss him again. "You're terribly adorable when you sleep." He felt metal under his chin.

"Nothing adorable about a gun under your chin, huh?" Rubedo asked, smirking. Gaignun rolled his eyes at the Makarov.

"I believe I asked you not to have your weapons accompany us to bed."

"Oh really?" Jr. asked, raising an eyebrow. Something was off. Gaignun looked closely at his eyes. "Jr., is there something wrong with your eyes?"

He tilted his head to the side. "I don't think so." Gaignun was certain something was wrong though.

"They're purple." Jr. laughed.

"They've always been purple. It's your favorite color. You said that just last night."

"No, Jr. Your eyes are blue. A beautiful blue."

"Gaignun, are you ok?" The boy asked, but it wasn't his voice. It was harsher, darker, with just an edge of sharp sarcasim in it. Gaignun shook his head, closing his eyes. It must've been one of Yuriev's tricks. But when he opened his eyes again, Jr.'s hair had turned bone white and a sick smile had carved itself onto his lips. "Why Nigredo. What ever is the matter? Don't love me anymore?"

The gun under his chin made a small clicking noise. "I was afraid you'd fall victim. I warned you, Executioner!"

* * *

Gaignun's eyes snapped open. He scanned the darkness, gasping deeply and shaking the boy on his chest. Jr. groaned and knitted his eyebrows together, before snuggling back into his place and whispering a small obscenity. His eyes shifted to the boy, checking to make sure the color of his hair was the same and dying for him to open his eyes. Raspy laughter echoed through his mind.

_Get the hell out of my body!_

_Oh but Nigredo. I must get used to the feel of this temple._

Nigredo stared in horror as his left hand moved of its own accord and drapped itself around his neck. _Yes, the mobility is amazing. Quite better than the bodies before. _Gaignun's fingers drummed against his throat._ I must remember to create more like you, Nigredo. _

Gaignun cut off his link, determined once again to push Dmitri back into his subconcious. It was a lot harder this time, his presence and his voice resisting strongly to his attack. Finally he was gone. Gaignun lie there in the darkness of their room, angry at himself for lowering his guard. It was a few more hours before Jr. began to wake up. He stirred against Gaignun's chest.

"Mmm...Good morning, Mr. Kukai." Jr. kissed the skin under him. "Sleep ok?"

Gaignun was afraid to answer. This seemed to much like his dream. Jr. ran a hand over the man's stomach, a frown making its way across his lips. "Gaignun, ok? You're all sweaty."

"Oh, you know." He said, his breathing heavy and his green eyes tired. "Girls have a habit of doing that around you. You're just so hot."

Jr. laughed, "Not gonna fly, Gaignun. Tell me the truth."

"On the contrary. The Durandal flies with perfect sufficiency. You should know that since you and I both pride it over anything else."

"You're going to keep avoiding my question, aren't you?"

Gaignun smiled softly at him and opened his mouth as if he were really going to answer him with a sincere statement. "Want some breakfast?"

"Gaignun, you are not going to distract me with---"

"You can have pancakes." he sang.

Jr. raised an eyebrow, an expression that read Seriously, Gaignun? Gaignun returned it with a hopeful smile. Jr. hadn't been allowed pancakes since he decorated Mary's face in them one morning when he had been feeling especially restless. "Are you avoiding the question?"

"Are you turning down pancakes?" They continued their staring match until Jr. finally gave in.

"Blueberry, fifteen minutes and you have to eat some too."

"I don't want any."

"All you ever do is drink coffee and while starving yourself sure does keep you skinny and helps lessen the carbs you have to burn when you work out to keep these abs." Jr. said, tabbing on his abdomen. "I think you should eat something." With a heavy, theatrical sigh he got out of bed, going to his closet to find some boxers. He usually didn't like to eat breakfast, but it was a small price to pay if Jr. was going to forget what he was talking about. Jr. lie in their bed, curling up in the plentiful blankets, making Gaignun sigh dreamily at the sight. A Realian brought their food to their room and after eating just a few bites to satisfy Jr., Gaignun started getting dressed.

"You've been trapped in this room for a while." He started to button up a white shirt, "You can go out and play. Just take your guns and promise you won't get into trouble." Jr. had been more than eager to agree, rushing to get dressed in record time and waving enthusiastically before sprinting out the door. Gaignun was putting on his suit jacket when the boy rushed back. "Hey Gaignun I forgot. Do you have to key to the Durandal's Hangar?"

Gaignun raised an eyebrow, "Why?"

"I need it for the integration process." Gaignun nodded and started to pull out his wallet from his back pocket. He dug around a little, finally pulling out the card key, but something red was sticking to it. Curious, he pulled on it. He hadn't remembered placing anything red into his wallet. He pulled it up, but it was unbelievably stuck. He pulled hard and it came free, jumping out of its slot in his wallet. "Oh my God." Gaignun said. Jr. cracked up laughing. A string of red square condoms flew out of the slot. "Jr.!" But the boy was gone, the door already shut behind him.

"That boy." he sighed.

* * *

Paperwork Hell was where Gaignun was sure he was going to spend the rest of his life. Surely this is what hell looked like. Stacks and stacks of paperwork. Neverending paperwork. Countless approvals and signatures and meetings and deadlines and blahblahblahblahblah! He decided he was going to take a break. The day was half way over anyway. He checked up on Jr. He was happy to hear that he was spending time with MOMO and that they were having fun. He'd been worried about the small prototype, but he it made him happy to know that she was ok. Life was good. Life was perfect. So what if he had to deal with Yuriev from time to time? As long as he had Jr. everything would be ok. Why is it that everytime peace settled over the buisnessman something went wrong? That was the very thought that ran through his mind as the growing pressure in his mind began to build. A pounding force as with the strength of a baseball bat collided with the inside of his skull. The pain continued, hitting his forehead from the inside. _Don't fight, Nigredo._

_This body is mine._ Pounding pressure.

_This body was meant for me. _

_It rejected you._

_It calls me._

Staggering to his bed, Nigredo bent over and closed his eyes, running his fingers in small circles around his temples. An electric charge burned between his skin. He opened his eyes to focus them on his chair. They flashed with a teal light as electricity burned in his mind, dissolving the pressure. _You won't have me._

_I will._

Then the voice was quiet again, going back to stasis for the next few minutes. Gaignun gasped as his eye refocused. He felt incredibly sick, and his vision was fading from one extreme to the next. Gaignun faintly heard the door open and recognized Jr.'s voice. He couldn't make out his words however. He felt the vibrations of his steps as he came to sit beside him, but Gaignun couldn't hear him. He felt Jr. trying to open his mind, but he fought the intrusion. He had to make sure Jr. didn't know. He had to keep him safe. "Jr." he said quietly.

"Yeah? What is it?" Gaignun was thankful he was able to hear him enough to know what he was saying. Gaignun struggled with the words he was about to say, knowing it would hurt his little lover. He hesitated but finally he said, "Jr...listen...I think...that you should sleep in your own room tonight." He could feel the shock from the way his body tensed beside him.

"Huh. Tired of me already?" It was supposed to be a joke. A snarky remark that was Jr.'s trademark, but the comback was too delayed. The playful tone nonexistant.  
"I'm sorry Jr., I'm just sick." Gaignun said, trying to keep his panic hidden.

"That's ok, Gaignun. I don't mind. That won't bother me." the boy's grip tightened on his shoulder. "You're always a burden, I'm used to it by now. I won't mind taking care of you."

Gaignun only shook his head. "I really think...it's for the best."

Gaignun knew Jr. was hurt and confused, he could just feel it. But the boy didn't protest and instead left.

* * *

Gaignun struggled with his inner demon deep into the night, but he was so thankful that Jr. wasn't there to seem him. Jr. wasn't there to see him double over in uncontrollable pain. Jr. wasn't there to see him destroying objects and wasn't there for him to harm as his telekenisis took on a will of its own and demolished objects left and right. The pain of the metallic baseball bat was back, desperatley pounding angrily to break through Gaignun's last defenses. The pain traveled throughout his skull, vibrating the very marrow in his bones. He gritted his teeth and bent his head back, placing a hand against the offending pain. It struck again, stronger. He bent over, clutching his head with both hands. _Nigredo._ A voice sang. Dynamite exploded in his mind and he stood up quickly at the sound consuming him. A strangled cry flowed out of him continuously at the pain. He fell to the ground again, hard, feeling himself fading away, falling into darkness. _Jr._ he cried as he struggled fruitlessly against his father. _Jr. _

_Nigredo._ _Why don't you sleep now, son? _

_Jr..._

_Goodnight, Nigredo._

_Jr..._

* * *

Jr. couldn't believe his eyes. He knew that man. He'd seen him in the countless faces of his brothers. He'd seen him in his nightmares. He'd seen him in hell. The bastard, the sadist, the Dr.

"Yuriev."

Dmitri raised an eyebrow. "Six-six-six. So good to see you. How have you been?"

Jr. growled and pulled his guns from his pockets. "What have you done with Gaignun?"

A bored expression passed over the man's face. "Gaignun? I don't know who you're talking about."

Jr.'s eyes flashed red with his anger and worry. "Tell me you bastard!"

"Well now, Rubedo. How am I supposed to answer your question if you have not told me who this Gaignun is." Mock realization hit the scientist. "Oh! That disgusting animal you kept? I had him disposed of. Wasn't that the name on his collar? Gaignun? Such a shame, really. If only you had listened to me. Maybe this would've never happened."

"Nigredo." Jr. said, his eyes narrowing.

Dmitri laughed, "Did you not get the parallel? Why it is the same, boy. I expected something created from my DNA to be a little bit smarter than that."

Jr.'s body shook angrily. "I don't know how you came back. I must be Satan's favorite person or something. Maybe his play-thing I don't know, but I'm going to send you back to Hell. Tell the pointy-tailed red guy down there I don't expect to see him anytime soon."

Jr. was about to pull the trigger when Dmirti's eyes turned green, his hair blackening. His expression softened into the his loving brother. "Jr." he said desperatley, his eyes almost frightened.

"Gaignun?" Jr. lowered his guns, but as fast as the vision came, it retreated back into a young Dmitri.

His laughter shook Jr.'s soul in a way that terrified him. "Ah, so Nigredo's adopted the name of the creature I killed. How very sweet. A testament to his loyalty?" Dmitri chuckled, pulling a laser gun from behind his back. "Or to his betrayal?"

"He's...you're...in his..." Jr. stood, shocked. He was frozen, defenseless. If he shot Dmitri, it would hurt Gaignun.

"Yes, this is his body. It's a very nice one too." he added, "But by the surprising amount of time you two have spent together, I'm sure you've been able to appreciate it, isn't that right six-six-six?"

Jr. gritted his teeth angrily, trying to figure out something. Dmirti took a few steps forward, the gun pointed at Jr.'s head the whole time. "Such a strange defect, I must admit. You variants seem to crave each other that way. Incestous relationships. Why do you think I kept you separated from your sisters, hm?" He laughed wickedly. "It appears that it didn't seem to matter either way."

Jr. was at a loss for words, searching his mind desperatley. "So what will it be, Rubedo, Red Dragon?" Dmitri's body began to glow with a teal energy.

"Nigredo, or you?"

Jr. only stood before the bastard, waiting for him to pull the trigger. They both knew his answer, he didn't have to say it. Dmitri's smile was the definition of sadistic as he pulled the trigger, and fired. The beam never hit Jr. though. A small anamoly engulfed it before it could reach him.

"What?" Dmitri hissed angrily, looking around for the source of protection.

"Why father. Tsk tsk tsk. Such a rude way to say hello to Rubedo. You might appear a boar, don't you agree?"

An anamoly opened in front of Jr. Slowly, the body formed in front of him. Albedo.

"Six-six-seven."

"My, my. I see that the Executioner feel for you ruse. Does that make you clever or does that make you lucky?"

Dmitri angrily fired shots a Albedo, who stood as if bored by the attempt. "What a reunion this has been! So much fun! Surely, we must all get together again."

He turned around, wrapping a startled and confused Jr. in the folds of his cape. "Bid them adieu, Rubedo. It would be rude to say otherwise."

Dmitri's body shuddered and a voice broke through their link._ Jr.!_

"Gaignun!" Jr. cried, struggling to get away from Albedo.

_Jr.! Albedo! Let him go!_

Madness consumed the room, sucking in the sound as if it were gasoline that fueled his voice. "Ah, and you're showing your true colors now, Executioner! Surely I shall leave Rubedo defenseless against you and your master! Of course! Death for the Dragon! Death for the Dragon!"

Another anamoly began to open. "Let the Dr. have you monster, the Dragon is mine."

He was struggled to get back to Yuriev, to Gaignun, but the waves were consuming him already. "Gaignun!" he cried against the white that surrounded him.

_Jr.!_

His vision filled purple and the room vanished.

* * *

A/N: Whooooo! CX There. Done done done done. Hope that wasn't a big disappointment compared to the last one. Anyways, reviews are my muse, so inspire it up people!


	20. Unto Madness

A/N: Guess who's supposed to be working on her senior project? CX

And guess who didn't keep me focused on it like she was supposed to? *cough*Ganon*cough*

And guess who's probably going to fail b/c of this chapter? Me. XD

But it's totally worth it!

**The Original Oxymoron**: You feed this story with your kind reivews. CX Food for thought. It must be really sugary with the lightening speed I seem to be updating. .

**Albedo's Jerusalem** (a.k.a applesauce): Yes, one day I promise I'll visit you in New York. I only hope that you don't turn out to be a psycho and kill me when I get off the plane. CX

**Ganon XD**: It's ok that you're not smart, sweetie. You've got so many other talents like um...um...um...^^; I'll get back to you.

**Tualha:** It is not ok for you to be stupid so stop it. Stop it right now.

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters but I'm willing to sacrifice an education for them!

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 20  
Unto Madness

Dmitri stared as the anamoly dissapated. "Stop struggling." he hissed, throwing his gun uselessly to the floor.

"Your boyfriend is gone." He took a seat on Gaignun's chair and scanned the demolished room. An evil smile darkened his face. "You two have been quite busy latley." He tapped his fingers on his desk. "Disgusting."

He raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. "Love?" He laughed, "So this fleeting emotion has sent you sleeping in incestous sheets, Nigredo?"

The scientist laughed, "Yes, you're right I wouldn't understand something so vile. I'm sorry that you're such an uncivilized being."

Dmitri pressed a button on Gaignun's desk, calling up the screen of Gaignun's computer.

A man sat on the other side, a blue uniform covered his body and a red barret sat on his bald head, dark glasses covered his eyes. He seemed surprised at the scientist. "Dr.?" the man asked. Dmitri nodded. The man smiled. "It's good to see you again, Dr. Yuriev."

"Sorry I'm late. I didn't think it would take this long for me to recover. How's the situation?"

"Extremely chaotic, sir." The man replied, "The Federation has grown extremely tired over the past fourteen years. Many unstable factions have arisen."

"And U-DO?" he asked.

"Fourteen years ago, one of the U.R.T.V.'s made partial contact with it, causing a medium-scale space-time anamoly then, it's been obstructed by two black holes. Even now we can not confirm the state of its existance."

Dmtiri had already assumed the one who had made contact with U-DO had been Albedo. One scan of Gaignun's memory was proof enough. He sat, thinking over his next move.

"Alright." He said, "Ready my forces, I'll contact you again shortly."

"Yes, sir." The man said, nodding. "By the way, how are you feeling? I heard your old body was disposed of."

He sat up straighter before responding. "I feel great. There's only so much life span extension one can achieve, but now I'm fine thanks to my son." He chuckled to himself at the feeling of Gaignun's shudder. "That is the son who killed me."

* * *

Jr. awoke in an E.S. He knew the machine, he had fought it at the Song of Nephilim. That seemed such a long time ago...He shook his head and moved his body experimentally, grateful that everything was functioning as it should be. He looked down, thankful that his guns were still there instead of magically disappearing as they had a habit of doing.

"What has awoken thee from thy eternal slumber, Dragon?"

"Albedo!" Jr. turned around. "What the hell?!" He pointed his guns at the demon.

Madness again, "Ah, shoot me, Rubedo. Let us both fall into the abyss that is space to float forever eternally. Make my dream reality!"

"What did you do to Gaignun?"

Albedo seemed a bit surprised by the statement. "Me? I would never dream of harming a hair on the head of Death. It is very dangerous, what with his scythe and all."

"How did Yuriev--"

"Consume him? I don't know. Perhaps a sneaky maneuvre, planned before his death." Albedo pressed a button and the E.S. sped up, traveling at an unbelievable speed through hyperspace.

"All in all, Death meets Death. An eternal circle. So where does that leave you, Rubedo?"

Jr. felt so lost. He'd never felt this confused or worried or well, scared in his entire life. He calmed himself down, trying to collect his thoughts. Yuriev was back. He had somehow taken over Gaignun's body...but then, where did that leave Gaignun? How was he going to get him back? What in the hell was he doing with Albedo?

"Why did you save me?" Jr. asked, lowering his guns. Albedo didn't answer, only smiled that sickening smile of his.

"I asked you a question."

"Why do you think I came to save you, Rubedo? A white knight for his damsel? An assassin for his target? A half for the whole? Choose a metaphor! Any comparison and I'll gladly accept it!"

"Where the hell are you taking me?"

"Why so glum, Rubedo? Do you miss your Executioner already? Be good and I might take you back to him."

Jr. looked back up at him. "What are you talking about?"

The E.S. Simeon stopped outside of a tall square building, floating in the vaccum surrounding them. Jr. was silent but alert as the machine landed inside. A dark door closed behind them, stopping the unbreathable space from entering the building. Jr. jumped down first, turning around quickly so that Albedo couldn't suprise him. He didn't know where he was, didn't care either. As his eyes scanned the darkness he only had one thing on his mind. Where was Albedo going to come from? He was suprised to see Albedo gracefully ascend from the E.S. He walked smoothly as if his very joints were made of silk. His voiced echoed eerily of the walls and back to the boy.

"Why Rubedo, why so shaken? Is it me? Well, let me help you become more comfortable!"

Jr. raised his guns. "Touch me and I'll kill you."

Albedo raised an eyebrow. "Really? Now, Rubedo. I thought you loved me."

Jr. fired, destoying a limb. Jr. was surprised when Albedo didn't laugh. The fact that he didn't fill the room with his madness frightened Jr. so he shot again, destroying the other. "Rubedo, you can continue to fire until there are no limbs left, but I'm afraid that it's not going to do a thing."

String like tendons pulled themselves from his shoulder, forming new arms.

"Why did you bring me here?! What do you want from me?"

Jr. was relieved to see the wicked smile form again; predictably unpredictable. "I want you, Rubedo." He answered, advancing on the boy. "And I want you alive."

Jr. gritted his teeth. "I'll fucking kill you Albedo. I swear to God I'll fucking kill you."

His eyes flashed red. His power wouldn't betray him this time. Albedo only shrugged at the sight. "Yes! Kill me, Rubedo! Grant me my wish and watch the reaper fall into Hell."

"What are you talking about?!"

Albedo's laugh was searing. "Act fast, Rubedo. Nigredo might succumb to the sins of the father before your decision is made."

Jr.'s arms dropped at the statement. "You...you know how to save Gaignun?"

Albedo grinned, "I don't believe you." Jr. said, raising his guns. "Why in the hell would you want to save Gaignun?"

"My Rubedo, I was benevolent and good once, misery made me a fiend. Make me happy and I shall again be virtuous."

They stared at each other. Madness and Dragon. Insanity and Violence. Jr. wasn't sure what to do. "What do you want?" Rubedo asked, keeping his stance.

"You, Rubedo." A wicked grin made its way onto his lips as he rushed forward. Jr. fired, blowing a hole in his chest, but Albedo didn't stop. He wrapped an arm around Jr.'s neck and grabbed his right arm. Laughing, he plunged the boy's arm into the hole, burying the limb to the shoulder. Albedo laughed as his body began to reform itself around his arm. "Can you feel it now, Rubedo?"

The boy cringed at the pulsing feeling engulfing him. "Can you feel the beating of my heart?"

"Damnit Albedo!" He shook with energy.

"What is it, Rubedo? Can't stand to be a part of the whole? Always so eager to be free of me, aren't you?" Jr. struggled to pull loose.

"Tell me, Rubedo? What would you give to free your Death?" He bent low to whisper in the redhead's ear.

"I'm not going to offer myself to you!" Jr. yelled. With a concentrated circle of energy, he burst his way out of Albedo's chest. Albedo balked a little, surprised by the blood flowing out of him. It surprised Jr. too. Albedo never bled. He smiled at the color staining his white suit. "Ah, Rubedo." he said around the blood collecting on his lips. Jr. was visibly shaken by the sight. He'd always been so rough with Albedo, knowing his invincibility and using him as a living target. To see him actually bleeding sent the redhead spiraling. Did he really want to kill his brother? Albedo took advantage of his mometary shock, appearing behind him and wrapping an arm around his throat. He lifted him up, choking him. "Choose me or your Executioner will suffer." Albedo's lips brushed against Jr.'s ear. "And we can't have that now, can we Rubedo?"

Jr. struggled to breath, feeling the anger rising within him. "Al-be...do!" He choked angrily. His eyes flashed red. "Such commitment to my demise! What strength you have kept hidden! Let us agree to this ceremony, this fealty. For Nigredo!"

Energy shot from Jr.'s body, sending Albedo flying into the darkness. Jr. grabbed his guns, pointing them at the demon. "I won't do this! You can't force me! I won't be forced into this! Not even by gunpoint!"

"Gunpoint!?" The lunatic laughed, "Let us revert to the ancient rituals of forced proposals!" His laughing was uncontrollable. He bent over. "Mmm, yes! A shotgun wedding! I shall be the weapon! Nigredo? The ammunition! The trigger? Decision! Make haste, Rubedo and choose wisely, else the execution will begin without us!"

Jr.'s rage shook his body forcefully, sending the waves of U-DO into a frenzy and lighting the once darkened room. The energy licked at Jr.'s skin, dissolving instantly at the contact. "Ah, yes, Rubedo! More! More! Send these haunted walls into chaos! Into madness and with them, take me! And also take Nigredo."

Jr. stopped instantly, gaining control of himself. "Gaignun..."

Albedo's smirk made Jr. sick. "I--" The lunatic walked closer to him, wrapping him in his arms.

"Say it, Rubedo. Whisper to me what I have longed to hear! Make my dream..."

"I'll do it."

Albedo laughed softly, lifting Jr.'s chin up to him. "Reality."

And with that, Jr. surrendered himself unto Madness as Albedo leaned down to claim him as his own.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for this chapter's shortness. But that just seemed like a good place to stop. After tomorrow I should be free from the confining deadlines that school has forced upon me! XD And maybe I can pick up on my updating frenzy. Yay! Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	21. So They Say

A/N: Wellll! Guess who's back? XD No, it's not the gigantic one eyed flying purple people eater but I am a dinosaur in disguise if that makes you feel any better. Blahblahblah random stuff that doesn't make any sense...

On with the fic!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and never will after that last restraining order...XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 21  
So They Say

chaos knew something was wrong. He could just feel it. It was too quiet on the Durandal. The very walls seemed to whisper warning to him as he walked to Gaignun's room. Even the uniformed employees seemed stressed. He frowned. Had something happened? chaos walked a little faster now, almost rushing into Gaignun's room. He scanned his translucent eyes over the room. Shards of broken vases, books thrown off shelves were strown across the floor. The pool table stood on three legs, the heavy balls lying on the floor of the green carpet. "Gaignun?"

The man behind the desk looked up sharply. "Gaignun." chaos said again, his voice hard. "What has happened?"

chaos felt unsettled by the look in his green eyes. He stared at the boy for a moment, thinking hard about something. "Tell me what's wrong."

The man sighed. "He's gone."

"Again!?"

"Albedo's strength is growing exponentially. One minute he was here and the next he was dragged into space."

chaos frowned. This was the first he'd heard about it. "Why didn't you tell me? We should get started looking for him."

"I've tried!" Gaignun shouted, dropping his head in his hands. "Nothing's working! I'm trying to open a link but something's blocking it. Mary, Shelley, and the whole crew are searching as we speak, but I'm afraid we're at a dead end."

chaos shook his head. "It's ok. Let me help. Perhaps we can get Canaan to--"

"-If the 100-series on the ship can't find him what makes you think you can?"

chaos was shocked by his reaction. Gaignun must have noticed this because he shook his head violently. "I'm sorry. I haven't been feeling myself latley and now Jr..."

chaos nodded. "I understand, don't worry. We'll find him."

Gaignun nodded and placed his head back into his hands. "Thank you."

chaos smiled sympathetically and turned to leave. He was on his way to the door when he accidentally stepped on something. He frowned and bent down to pick it up. "Gaignun?"

The man lifted his head in the seraph's direction. "When did you get this?" He held up the copy of Paradise Lost to the variant who only shrugged. "Is that really important right now?"

chaos shook his head. "I guess not." He made his way out the door, book in hand. Once the door was closed behind him he pressed his back against it. He pulled his connection gear out of his back pocket. The blue screen formed itself from the small object.

"chaos?"

"Canaan." chaos answered, giving him a small smile.

"To what do I owe this disturbance?" the Realian asked, raising one orange eyebow. chaos sighed deeply before whispering very softly.

"It's happened."

* * *

Jr. squirmed in his nightmarish fit. Albedo only watched the boy sleep from his seat on his twisted throne. Albedo knew Jr. didn't want to be there. He knew that given the slightest chance his dragon would take flight. He tilted his head to one side as he watched the boy flip over in the twisted bed that existed in the room. Albedo didn't sleep. He didn't need to sleep. He couldn't if he'd wanted to anyway. The bed was for Jr.'s comfort only. He silently wondered if Gaignun had such a hard time putting Jr. to bed but frowned angrily at the thought of the two sharing a bed together and banished the thought from his mind.

"Rest, Rubedo." Albedo had cooed to him.

"Fuck you, Albedo!" Rubedo had responded, forcing himself to stay up and watch the white demon.

"I'm not stupid. I know you..." He shook his head roughly to wake himself up. His words amused the madman. He leaned down to stroke the boy's chin affectionatley. "Oh Rubedo. You are mine now. I will have plenty of time to enjoy your company."

Albedo couldn't say that he relished the devastated look on Jr.'s face, but he grinned wickedly anyway, capturing the boy's lips. If you can love Nigredo, surely you'll fall victim to me. Albedo thought as he looked at the boy. He whimpered helplessly in his sleep. His eyebrows furrowed and his lips quivered. The name of Albedo's rival would frequently escape his lips as the boy tossed and turned. Dreams! Hopeless dreams! Albedo shouted to himself angrily. He wasn't going to give up this space of reality. No matter who he had to kill to defend it. His lips pulled back into a sadistic smile. No. He was not above murder. As he watched his leader tremble under the weight of the visions concocted by his mind Albedo realized that he hadn't been this close to Jr. in a long time. Not like this, not in the confines of sanity or anything resembling a prolonged experience. It made him feel vulnerable. Brought him back to a time when he had been frightened of everything. A shadow, a sound, a person might have excited his mind into fear but as long as he had Jr...He smirked to himself. He wasn't that little boy anymore was he? The waves of U-DO seemed to vibrate along his body in response. Albedo loved the delusion brought on by the lifeform. It made him strong. It made him fearless. Lunacy kept him in a world free of reality; A world of his creation and one governed by the invincibly immortal. He watched the waves' sad attempt at claiming the troubled creature, dissolving on contact of the boy.

Nigredo's name again, dear Rubedo? He asked himself. By what magic does Death cling so close to your heart?

"Gaignun..." the boy cried, worry in his voice.

Albedo frowned. He destested their names. Were they so ashamed of themselves that they had to become new people? Determined to rid themselves of the shadow that was the Yuriev Institute? He hated their alias', hated them to the point of pure rage but most of all he hated Rubedo's. Jr. It gave Nigredo ownership of the boy, made him part of his possessions. Gaignun Kukai and his "son". Albedo's open palms tightened into fists. Nigredo...

"Gaignun!" Jr. screamed. The boy sat up in the twisted shape of the bed, gasping.

"A tear, Rubedo? Ah, such tears what beauty they hold. They should be saved for one worthy of such devotion."

"I-I'm not crying!" Jr. yelled angrily. He wiped the stray tear away from his eye. Albedo smirked and approached him. Jr. quickly grabbed his guns as a reflex and aimed them toward the monster, but remembered what he had agreed to earlier and simply let his arms go limp. Albedo took a seat next to him on the bed's edge. "I ought to be thy Adam."

"What?" Jr. asked harshly, running his eyes along the contours of Gaignun's present.

"I ought to be thy Adam, but rather I am the fallen angel. Is that not what the monster pleaded?"

Jr. looked at him angrily, shaking his head. "You never make any sense, Albedo." he said sadly. "All you ever do is talk. You just talk and talk and talk. It doesn't mean a damn thing."

His hands tightened around the handel of his Makarov's. "I used to think there was a method to your madness. Some sort of sight that none of us could see." Jr. looked up at Albedo, his eyes full of anger and sadness inexplainable anywhere else. "But I was wrong. You're nothing but a lunatic! A motherfucking lunatic! Trying to map your way through your infinite existence with crackpot theories and bloodlust!"

Albedo pounced on the boy. He loved it when Jr. fought him. He didn't want Jr. to be submissive. A dragon was useless without his fire. "Theories?! Bloodlust! Oh Rubedo, you are my only drug! My only form of the decayed concept of crack is lust for your blood." He pressed the boy down, taking in the scent of him as the neropinephrine rose and fell with the U.R.T.V.'s anger. "And that, my precious, precious dragon." he whispered, "Is my only theory."

* * *

The moment Dmitri heard the door shut closed, he reverted from Gaignun back to his form. It was much more comfortable and it gave him a sense of control.

_One you don't have when you see my face in the mirror? _Gaignun spat.

Dmitri smiled. _Have you forgotten that we share the same features, Nigredo?_

_They'll notice. Someone will. You won't get away with this._

_And what will they do exactly, Nigredo? Kill me? Kill you? This body is all the hostage I need. _

Dmitri walked around his desk. _It's too bad that I'll have to hide behind you for a while. At least until I get what I want_. He fumbled in his back pocket, pulling out the card key to the Durandal's Quarantine Hangar. _What the hell are you going to do with that?_

_That's for me to know and you to do nothing about._

He exited the door, changing into the form of his son as he did so. He had a few people he needed to talk to and a Realian to obtain. He walked the halls of the Residential Area as if he'd lived there his entire life. _I've been here most of yours._

He finally found the door he was looking for and knocked on it loudly before it opened.

Ziggy was surprised to see him when he entered his room. "Gaignun Kukai?"

"Ziggurat 8." He said as way of greeting. "How are you?"

"Um, fine thanks." Ziggy responded nonchalant. "MOMO's at the bridge right now if you're looking for her. She's trying to help locate Jr."

Gaignun nodded. "Yes. I have some information concerning that. You see, it would appear that we have to leave Second Miltia. We've picked up a faint reading, but we aren't sure what's there so we wish to take the Durandal in order to be fully prepared. I would like you both to accompany us."

"I'm not sure if that's possible." Ziggy started, "We were supposed to begin MOMO's analysis soon. It has been delayed far too long. They are afraid that the data might be contaminated."

Ziggy just shrugged. He really didn't want MOMO to have to go through with it. He was afraid for her.

"Ziggurat, please." Gaignun said in earnest. "I need not only MOMO's help but yours as well."

Ziggy sighed. "I am worried about Jr. too and I'm certain that MOMO would want to help. I'll contact Juli right away. Perhaps, with some form of notice, she'll allow it."

Gaignun nodded. "Thank you so much, Ziggurat."

Ziggy nodded and made his way out his own door. "Jr. would do the same for any of us, wouldn't he?" He flashed the small smile that was usually researved for MOMO and left. The door shut behind him, leaving the room silent and empty. Dmitri laughed.

_This is going to be too easy. _

* * *

"Whisper it to me."

"I--need you."

"Ah, again, Rubedo."

Jr. sighed and repeated his phrase, monotone. Albedo's madness echoed throughout the structure. "You're insane." The boy spat, remaining on his back.

Albedo suddenly became calm. In a voice that hid any trace of the waves that contaminated his body he spoke, "One who recognizes his sickness, his madness and knows the cause from which it was created; can you really call such a person insane?"

Jr. was surprised at the coherence in that statement. He stared back at his brother.

"Yeah. I can. I can do whatever the hell I want."

Albedo was overly satisfied with his response. "But you can't, Rubedo. Not anymore."

He leaned down again, cradling the smaller body of the boy in his arms. "You are eternally bound by the rule of the rose, are you not?"

"I thought I always was." Jr. said, uncaring.

Albedo laughed, "Ah! My dragon, my flower, mon précieux! Nigredo came too late. We've abided, since the beginning. Innocence and passion. One falls into the hand of the other, does it not?" He pulled the boy hard against him. "Binding, constricting. Abandon surrounding abandon. A rose continously wraps around itself; dirait-on."

"No." Jr. said, anger in his features. "We're not the same. We've never been the same."

"We were once, Rubedo." Albedo placed his lips against the boy's throat. "And we will join together again."

"Albedo." Jr said, turning his face away from his dark half. "You can't force me to want something I don't. I don't love you."

Albedo smirked against the boy's skin. "And Nigredo's seduction?"

"What?" Jr. said angrily, cringing at the feel of Albedo and waiting for the blood bath to begin.

"Death. Such an alluring creature." Albedo continued. "How fast he has dragged you to the bottom. But were you fooled, Rubedo? Passion victim to his executioner?"

"Just what the hell are you trying to say?"

"How far have you truly fallen for Nigredo, Rubedo?"

"I love him, you bastard!" Jr. struggled under Albedo.

"So soon? So soon to fall for the dark reaches of sin. My Rubedo, consumed by a new feeling, new pleasure. Are you sure it isn't only a carnal desire for Death's wonders that has lead you to feelings of false love?"

"I love him, Albedo. It's not--not like that! It never was!"

Albedo's smile was wicked. "I gave myself to you in order to save him!" Jr. screamed, his eyes flashing red. "I would give anything to save him! I love him! I don't care what you say to me! I don't care what you do to me!" Jr.'s body calmed again.

"Gaignun..." he choked.

"Oh Rubedo. The eldest of us, yet the youngest in mind. Dragon fall victim to his Execution! Passion intertwined with Death!"

Albedo ran his gloved claws across the chest of Jr.'s shirt. "Say those words to make him happy. Speak those lies to justify lust, Rubedo." Jr. frowned at Albedo's words and at the breath on his skin. That wasn't true. It wasn't true. It just wasn't true! Albedo's words twisted the boy's mind, working to him fall to their meanings; fit their definition.

"Filial duty or Lust, Rubedo. Nothing less nothing more. Faux emotion. Poor Death."

Albedo smiled as the boy's mind wavered under his voice. Nigredo wasn't the only one who could mold minds, was he?

"Innocence and Passion, Rubedo. We were meant for each other, always meant for each other."

Jr. rejected his voice and shook his head. He turned the full force of his deep blue eyes on the madman. Albedo loved that look, loved the fire in the deep blue ocean.

_Who you are sustains you eternally. Your very being is nourished by your own enlightened reflection. You and I, Rubedo; two parts of the same whole. Do we not fulfill the the very theme of Narcissus?_

"Albedo. I love him. Nothing you do or say will change that."

Albedo was unphased by his objection and continued his assult, carefully running a hand through the boy's red hair. _Innocence and Passion continuoulsy wrapping around one another. Abandon enveloping abandon._

Albedo smirked at Jr.'s wavering mind. He placed his lips against the boy's softly as he knew Gaignun would've done. He stealthily ran a hand under the boy's shirt, delicatley caressing his skin with his clawed gloves just the way Jr. would've begged Gaignun for and when his lips ran smoothly against his ear, Jr. shivered involuntarily. Albedo smirked at his effect on his twin, his light, his reflection. "Dirait-on."

* * *

A/N: Welp. CX I hope that chapter disappoint. I was feeling rather -ish obvioulsy. XD Oh well, lemme know how bad it was. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	22. Sleep

A/N: Well here I am. C: I've slaved over a hot computer that's probably going to explode and perhaps permenantly strained my brain in order to accomplish this chapter. CX

This one is purley AlbedoxJr. and boy was it freakin hard to write. I think I've converted to Gaignunism myself. XD

But hey, I tried and I hope this attempt doesn't anger *cough* ruin the story.

Anyways, on with the fic!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and that-I believe-is the true reason behind global warming.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 22  
Sleep

"Rubedo..." A frightened Albedo whispered in the darkness of their room.

Rubedo sighed and made room for him. Albedo happily took his place beside his brother, burying his face into the chest of his shirt. "Nigredo was right, that was a bad idea."

Albedo snuggled closer and Rubedo wrapped him in his arms. "I've got you now, go to sleep."

Albedo shook his head. _I can't_, _Rubedo._ he sent, to keep from disturbing Nigredo. _Everytime I close my eyes I see his face. _

_Well then don't think about it_. Rubedo said sleepily.

_But Rubedo..._

Rubedo held him tighter and opened his eyes._ Alright, well what do you want me to do about it?_

Albedo shrugged. _I don't know...tell me another story...?_

Rubedo sighed mentally before agreeing. Anything to get some sleep. _Alright, well...once upon a time, there was a small boy who was afraid of every little thing in the world. So one night he asked his brother to tell him a story to calm him down. So his brother, who was very very sleepy sighed and said 'Once upon a time, there was a little boy who-_

-_Rubedo!_

The boy grinned at his twin. _Well, you asked for it._

Albedo laughed down their link. _Thanks. I think I can sleep now. _

_Good. That means I can sleep too._

_Rubedo..._

_Yeah, I will. Don't worry about it. I've got you. Sleep._

Albedo smiled and closed his eyes. Rubedo waited until his younger twin was asleep before he finally relaxed enough to do the same.

* * *

He didn't need Jr. to kill him. He knew that. He could have destroyed himself a long time ago. Being the anit-existance of the waves that had contaminated him, he could simply destroy his own body; pitting power against power in a clash no being within the area would be able to withstand. He could've done it a long time ago. He could've destroyed himself the moment the wavelength had consumed him. But he didn't and he wouldn't. He had been waiting for Jr. He viewed his death as the most beautiful experience that could ever happen to him. In death, he would be free of the crippling fear that plagued his mind. He would be free of the knowledge of his brothers' inevitable death, for while Jr. was immortal he was not invincible. Gaignun was not even that, completely mortal and susceptible to age as well as injury. Albedo would never admit the fact that Gaignun's death scared him. It was easier to hate the man who had failed to keep his promise.

The fact remained the same though, he was absolutley paralyzed with fear over the death of his brothers and his neverending, lonley existance without them. If Albedo died, he wouldn't have to worry anymore. He would wait for them, his brothers, for when they came.

So he constantly tormented Jr., trying to get him past the point of control; to the point of Red Dragon and to his death.

Jr. was the key. Jr. was freedom and like a woman might save herself for marriage, Albedo had been saving his death for Jr.

But now, he wasn't so sure. As he watched the boy shiver underneath his touch and tighten his lips against the noises threatening to make their way out of his throat, Albedo thoroughly wished it was his name Jr. was whispering in his sleep. He wished it was his love the boy would sacrifice for and suddenly, life became more appealing.

"Jr." Albedo whispered against the boy's neck.

"Don't call me that."

"Is that not what he calls you, Rubedo? Is it forbidden from any others?"

"Forbidden from you. Only you."

Albedo grinned, "Rubedo is much more acceptable?"

Jr. frowned angrily. "Such futile anger, mon précieux!"

Jr. remained silent. He was tired of this, tired of Albedo's absolute nonsense. He just wanted to know that Gaignun was ok.

"You said you'd help me. You said you'd help Gaignun."

Albedo stopped his assult on the boy's young skin. Jr. felt the smile as he said, "Ah, yes the Executioner. We have time. We have plenty of time."

"You have plenty of time. Time means nothing to you and everything to me and if you won't help me then the deal's off."

"Such impatience! Yes time holds little value for me, but unless you want our dear old dad to realize our alliance then I suggest we wait for them to come for us."

"They're coming this way? How do you know?" Jr. asked, suspicious.

Albedo sighed against him. "The wavelength that consumes both this realm and me, what could it possibly be, Rubedo? The very bane of our father's existance, perhaps? The very thing that haunts even the Dr.'s nightmares?"

"He'll come here in order to confront U-DO. Is that what you're trying to tell me?"

"Brilliant, my Rubedo, brilliant!"

He bent down to kiss the boy's lips. Well at least that makes sense, Jr. thought. Dmitri was consumed by a fear of U-DO. His terror was so great that he was bent on destroying the lifeform; his whole reason for creating the U.R.T.V.'s. It only made sense that Albedo's ancient relic would be one of his first targets.

"Albedo. Is Gaignun going to be alright?"

Jr. was surprised as Albedo pushed himself off of the boy. Albedo stood, staring down at his brother with a strange sort of look Jr. hadn't seen since they were small.

"Rubedo. You care only for your Executioner."

"I told you that already." Jr. snapped. "I love Gaignun. Gaig-nun! I'll spell out his fucking name to make it clearer for you if I have to!"

Albedo sighed and nodded, seeming to Jr. truly hurt. The variant shook his head. This had to be a trick. "You may leave, Rubedo. Or you can stay and wait for your Death. I suggest you stay, lest the father uses his second skin against you."

"You're letting me go?" Jr. asked, shocked.

"The heart wants what the heart wants."

And with that Albedo left the bed and took his throne, leaving a confused Jr. alone.

* * *

Jr. didn't mind this arrangement at all. He walked the dark halls, thinking that it would be a good idea to learn the layout of this structure if they were going to have to fight for Gaignun here. It only made sense. He walked down the hallways, twirling a Makarov in one hand. Whirl, click, whirl, click, whirl, click. It was dark here. Occasionally U-DO's waves would reach out toward its antithesis, only to be dissolved on contact. Despite the curling tendrils, Jr. felt safe here for some strange reason he couldn't explain. He wandered aimlessly, occassionally getting lost or stumbling down dark stairs when U-DO suddenly decided it wasn't going to light up the room for him in that specific area. Jr. wasn't sure how long he'd been here. It was impossible to tell day from night in this place. He just hoped Gaignun was ok. That's all he cared about. He was making his way down an eerily long corridor when he found a red circular container just his height flashing blue around its top. "Hm? Hey, what's this?" Jr. asked himself, excited.

He moved over to it, placing a hand over the top. "I wonder what it does."

He looked around it for some sort of button or switch that would activate this new exciting object. He was running his hand along the side of the object when it shocked him. "Ow." He hissed, pulling back. "Stupid thing!" He kicked at it, but that didn't appease his anger, so with a wicked grin he pointed his Makarov at the thing.

"Well, I found my next target." He said aloud before pulling the trigger. The container exploded in fire, consuming the hall in yellow-orange disaster. Jr. didn't have enough time to move.

_Not your smartest moment, Rubedo. _Albedo sent. He appeared from the firey hall and swept up the boy before the flames could claim him.

Jr. opened his eyes to find himself sitting in Albedo's throne. "Rubedo. Curiosity killed the cat." Albedo lifted his hand to the boy, touching a small burned spot on his face.

"Ow!" Jr. yelled, knocking his hand away angrily. "Why the hell did you do that?"

"Rubedo, I am not the one who set off the trap and threatened the integrity of your skin for the precious Executioner." He pulled off his clawed glove to place a cold hand against the same spot.

Jr. winced and knocked him away again. "Why do you keep doing that? It hurts!"

Albedo sighed. "Your beautiful face, Rubedo. Who knew that fire could harm a dragon?"

Jr. returned the strange look in Albedo's eyes with anger. Albedo raised his hand again to touch the boys face. Jr. shot him.

"Rubedo!" he laughed. He lunged for the boy, pushing him back onto the throne. "You feed my desire for you every second we spend near each other and yet you refuse my existance. Rubedo, are we not from the same body? Do we not share the same heart?"

"Get off me, you bastard!'

"Tell me, Rubedo. Why are you still here?"

"You know why. It was your idea." Jr. pulled himself away from the psycho. "Not to mention I can't operate your E.S." he mumbled.

Albedo laughed. "Yes! The idea of madness! Genius crossed the line into lunacy! My sweet, sweet Rubedo."

"What the hell are you--"

Albedo's smile stopped the boy's sentence. He studied it, trying to figure out the meaning behind the mask. Albedo's emotions had always been a puzzel; one emotion could mean the exact opposite. It was almost like trying to figure out an equation where none of the numbers made sense and had no structure. "I love you, Rubedo."

Jr.'s expression turned from anger to conusion. He wasn't sure how to respond to that.

"What you would give for your Executioner I would give a thousand times for you, my leader."

Albedo walked around the boy in a lazy circle. "Kingdoms, empires, worlds would fall beneath my power. Space confined! Domains bowed before their composure! If that is what you would wish, my rose, I would gladly give it."

"Albedo..." Jr. said, startled.

Albedo stopped in his orbit around the boy, pulling him against him from behind. "Sakura, that filthy girl. She tried to keep you away from me." Albedo leaned down to enjoy the anger evaporating off his skin. "Consume you with her faux innocence to lure you away from me. Now Nigredo."

Albedo placed a hand over Jr.'s eyes and pressed the back of his head against his chest. "The Executioner dares to copy the girl. Whispering sweet music to your body, deceiving it. Don't believe it, Rubedo. Be strong. It is me. It is me."

Albedo thrust his left arm through Jr.'s back, feeling the arch and the gasp that he had caused. He kept his right hand over Jr.'s eyes. "It is me that you crave. It is my love you need."

"Albedo...?" Jr. gasped. Albedo's claw broke through the boy's hip, but there was no blood on the white glove. Albedo brought the exposed claw to rest on Jr.'s heart. "But my word is never enough, is it Rubedo?"

Albedo extracted his arm and released his brother, unharmed. Jr. stared with amazement at his intact body. "Albedo?" Jr. asked.

Albedo smiled sadly at him. "Rubedo. My passionate rose, my red dragon, mon précieux."

He made his way back to his throne and sat himself down. He placed his discarded glove over his cold hand and looked over at his twin, a strange emotion that shook Jr. flashed across his face.

"My nights have been so frightful without you."

* * *

Jr. wasn't sure just exactly what time it was; nor did he care. All that mattered to him was that he was sleepy. He passed his brother warily. Albedo hadn't moved from his throne; in constant harmony with the madness that reigned in his mind. Jr. wasn't sure what to make of the madman. He had somehow become softer, more vulnerable the longer Jr. was there. His eyes constantly carried a new emotion, a real one. He didn't try to attack the boy any longer, speaking to the variant only when he asked him a question. His mind seemed very preoccupied, but Jr. was afraid to let his guard down. As the boy slipped silently into the deformed bed he couldn't help but feel like he was being watched. He tried to make himself relax, but he just couldn't. He let out a sigh and tried to convince his muscles to loosen so that he could be comfortable, but his tired mind was strangley alert.

_Do not fear, Rubedo. The knight will not come for his sleeping beauty. It would seem he does not want to be rescued. _

Jr. sat up and sighed. _That's not it Albedo. _

Albedo raised a white eyebrow toward the boy; curious. _What is it that plagues your mind, dragon?_

_Is it true what you said? Are you afraid? To sleep, I mean._

Albedo looked away and stared into the darkness in front of him. He didn't answer.

_Answer me._

Albedo frowned at the command. _Yes._

_Well then, _Jr. sent. He patted the space beside him. _Come on. I'll take care of you._

Albedo turned to look at him, his face screaming surprise.

Jr. forced himself to smile. If he was going to have to fight alongside Albedo, he might as well try to bridge the huge gap between them. He watched the demon get up and walk almost hesitantly to the bed, as if he were afraid. He's still in there, Rubedo thought to himself as the man sat down. A crazy thought bloomed into Jr.'s mind. Maybe I can bring him back...then he can come back with me, to the Durandal.

Albedo only sat there, a little in shock. His reaction softened Jr.'s heart against the monster and he urged him onto the bed. Jr. laid back and allowed Albedo to lie next to him. The were both silent for a moment, staring at the infinite darkness of the ceiling.

_And for what purpose does this serve you? _

_None._

Again silence owned the darkness. _Rubedo..._Albedo sent.

Jr. smiled to himself. He could feel the uncertainty in the variant's mind. His little brother. Jr. turned his head to his twin's direction. It was strange, but he could almost see him again. The juvenile Albedo, begging him for protection. Jr. reached out his hand and urged his younger twin over to him, wrapping him in his arms. Albedo sighed and buried his face in Jr.'s chest.

_Rubedo?_

_It's ok. I'll wait for you to fall asleep, Albedo. I've got you. Sleep._

So for the first time in fourteen years, the demon, the sadist, the psycho, the insane closed his eyes and slept.

* * *

A/N: Well, I hope that was ok. ^^; Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! C:


	23. Relapse

A/N: Ok, so I felt that we needed to know a little bit about how Gaignun was doing. Jeez, I miss him. Am I the only one that misses him? XD

Anywhozer (yeah I totally stole that word from you, Ganon hush) this chapter may seem a little random, or at least that's how it felt after I was done with it. ^^; But I feel like it needed to be in here so here it is. If it's just ridiculous, I'll gladly fix it or take it out, whatever any of you want.

Speaking of my reviewers: I love all of you very very much. CX  
And I would like to thank my newest reviewer

**hope21108.**

I was so excited to recieve a review from you and I am very upset with myself that I forgot to thank you in the last chapter posted.  
I was aware that you alerted, but sometimes people alert and don't actually read it later. Thank you for pushing this story along, every little review sparks fire. CXXX  
Anyways (ass-kissing done) let us begin, shall we?

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters but in this tiny, pad-locked room I can imagine that I do. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 23  
Relapse

Gaignun is trying so hard not to be that guy. You know, the one that ruins the fun. The killjoy. The "Buzzkillington" that appears on Jr.'s ancient shows but he can't help it. He knows this world isn't real. As he watches the object of his affection dive into the ocean of their artificial beach, Gaignun knows this is wrong.

The sky over the beach was beautiful. It was something perhaps only seen in paintings, an act only capable of the most skilled artisans. Gaignun smiled at the sky. He clicked a button on the remote in his hand. Dark clouds created themselves over the sky, blocking out the offensive sun and calling forth rain, thunder, and lightening to replace it. Jr. gave an angry cry and began his trip back to the beach. When his feet touched the sand he began to run toward the beach house where Gaignun sat, smiling and waiting.

"What the fuck, man?" Jr. hissed.

"You even sound like him." Gaignun chuckled. "Is this the best Yuriev could come up with to keep me out of his hair?"

Jr. sighed. "Spanish Inquisition?"

Gaignun nodded. Jr. took a seat across from Gaignun.

"My favorite story."

"Paradise Lost."

"Albedo's?"

"Frankenstein."

"What did Jr. say when I asked him about MOMO the first time?"

"I said 'It's not like that.'"

"How old is Jr.?"

"Twenty-six."

"How old is he physically?"

"I'm tweleve, Gaignun. We both know that."

"The public thinks he's-?"

"-Fourteen."

"His best friend is?"

"Outside of you, it's chaos. You know that Gaignun. Do we have to do this everyday?"

"Jr.'s number is?" Jr. sighed at his brother's persistance and continued.

"Six-six-six. My real name is Rubedo. I'm the link master. I'm the Red Dragon. Albedo and I were conjoined twins. His heart was attached to the back of my right chest. My full name is Gaignun Kukai Jr. Mary and Shelley Godwin were your mistresses before I showed them up. I exploded the halls in pudding on our last birthday-or your last birthday since I voluntarily swtiched mine out of the kindness of my heart because we all know I'm that kind of guy."

Gaignun nodded. "Impressive."

Jr. sighed. "Good. Are we done now?"

"No."

Jr. groaned and frowned. "Gaignun, do we really have to do this? This is stupid."

Gaignun's eyes ran across the dragon tattoo on Jr.'s left arm.

"The first time Jr. told me he loved me."

Jr.'s eyes stared into Gaignun's accusing ones.

"When was it?"

They stared at each other for a long time. Rain pounded against the old-fashioned tin roof and swept against the clear glass doors. Gaignun sat in his chair, back straight, expression professional. Jr. finally smiled.

"Alright. You win." The boy's voice changed from the playful sarcasm of Jr. into the deep rasp of Dmitri. The boy shrugged and sighed.

"How am I supposed to know something so trivial, Nigredo?"

"Really, did you expect me to fall for something like this? We're not even on the Foundation. There's no possible way I could be on this beach."

The fake Jr. got up and walked into the kitchen. He came back with an apple and smiled back at Gaignun. He hated that look on Jr. Sadism didn't suit him. "Why can't you just accept this image, Nigredo?"

Jr. raised his arms to indicate their surroundings. "You love this beach. You created it for Rubedo, didn't you?" He took a bite of the apple. "This whole place, this whole Foundation was built for him. In an image he could appreciate, wasn't it?"

The villan's smile was really starting to get to Gaignun. "It's not real." Gaignun answered sternly.

"Ah, of course. Always the realistic, weren't you Nigredo?"

The immitation threw the apple over his shoulder. It moved toward Gaignun, placing a hand on his left thigh. He leaned up onto the tips of his toes in order to whisper in the man's ear.

"So many others would accept this reality. It would be so much easier. Go on."

The fake's hand traveled down the inside of Gaignun's thigh. "A perfect world created for you, Nigredo. For you and this 'little boy'. Take it. It's what you want." His hand started to move again, taking its slow time toward its goal. Gaignun grabbed the imposter's wrist and yanked the vision up to him.

"That's not the way Jr.'s seduction plays out." He said. His emerald eyes burned bright with anger. "Jr.'s appeal is something unique. Something no one but he can accomplish."

The poser frowned in a way that Jr.'s face would never contort as it sighed angrily.

"If you're going to try to decieve me. I suggest you spend a little time researching your subject."

* * *

Dmitri balked at the rush of pain against his skull.

"Gaignun? Are you ok? Should I get somebody?"

"No. No, I'm ok." Dmitri said.

MOMO frowned and looked up at him. "Really, Gaignun? Maybe we should head back to the bridge or call Mary or Shelley."

"No, no. I'm perfectly fine. Just a small migraine."

There was a frown on her pink lips and strong doubt in her golden eyes but she nodded anyway and dropped the subject. She turned her attention back to the console she had been working at.

"Well Gaignun," she started, staring at the screen. "I think we can do it from here. I'm not sure it's entirley safe though."

"Do we really have any other choice?" Dmitri asked.

"Well..." MOMO said, her sweet voice quiet. "I guess...we really don't."

Dmitri nodded. She didn't realize what she was doing, did she? As she typed away at the console, she was unknowingly teaching him step by step how exactly to operate these Zohar containers. She thought she was helping him, using the Zohars as a sort of high-powered location device, reacting to U-DO's wavelengths. He would need this later, but first things first. Dmitri looked down at the red number on Gaignun's right hand. _We'll take care of them first, Nigredo. Then we can get ready._

_Get ready? Ready for what?_ Nigredo sent angrily. Dmitri was ready for the electric pressure this time and easily deflected it.

_It's a shame you have to fight me, Nigredo. Why don't you just lay back and relax? Enjoy some of your brother, hm?_

Dmitri started to construct another image but Gaignun fought it down. _You don't want me to relax. You want me to relapse. I won't let you hurt him. _

Dmitri sighed. _With your brothers out of the way, no one will be able to stop me, Nigredo_. _You have only two choices. You may stay alive with me, or you may "relapse" as you call it. Now I am very thankful for this body and I would happily give you a nice rest if you would let me..._

Another image and Gaignun's there again. He's trying not be that guy. He's trying so hard not to be that guy. You know, the kill joy the---

The image crashed, making Dmitri's head spin. It was intense and knocked the scientist to the floor. MOMO gasped and turned her attention from the emulators. "Gaignun? Gaignun!"

She was talking to someone now, trying to get help from the bridge.

_I will get them, Nigredo. I'll kill them with the very power you've been trying to supress since you left the institute. There will be no reason to hide behind your body. Everyone will claim you died trying to save your brother. No more of this "Gaignun" nonsense. _

_You won't be able to do this. I won't allow it._

_Oh, but Nigredo, you don't have a choice. _

Gaignun's protests against the man had no effect, but he continued to fight anyway. A dangerous idea sprouted in his head. If he could destroy his memory, Dmitri wouldn't be able to use his body to fight. He started, taking his mind apart piece by piece. He would dissolve his very past if it meant saving Jr. Anything to save Jr. But Dmitri stopped the process, rebuliding everything he destroyed and clamping down on his concious.

_Now, now Nigredo._

A painful clap shut him down completley and sapped him of energy. He was so tired. So so tired.

_Then rest, Nigredo. Rest._

Gaignun couldn't fight it this time. The image came again.

The stars are out. It is remarkably beautiful, something only the most skilled of artisans could create. Gaignun's trying again. He's trying so hard not to be that guy. You know, the one who ruins all the fun. The kill joy. The "Buzzkillington" that appears in Jr.'s ancient shows. He knows this world isn't real. As he looks down to see the object of his affection holding his hand and smiling up at him he knows this is wrong.

_Jr._

* * *

Jr. opened his eyes slowly onto the darkness. He tried to think about it for a moment, but he couldn't seem to remember. He felt a warm body lying on him. He smiled. He should really wake Gaignun up, but decided not to. When was the last time he'd woken up before Gaignun? He shook his head. He didn't think that'd ever happened, actually. The thought sparked something in his mind. That never happens. It wasn't Gaignun. He remembered with a sad sigh that it was Albedo.

**My nights have been so frightful without you...**

The memory of that phrase burned into Jr. heart, had imprinted itself deep in there somewhere. It was so strange, only a few days ago he hated the man lying asleep on him. Jr. ran a hand through the man's white hair. But despite all Albedo had done, Jr. felt he understood him a little bit better now. Some of his madness made sense. He just needs help. Jr. said to himself. It is my fault he's like this...isn't it? I should do something. He smiled to himself. Gaignun would be so proud of him. Wouldn't it be great? The three of them together like they used to be? Jr. smile soured. No. It'd never be the same. How could it be? They both loved him, loved him more than any brother or sibling should and he loved Gaignun. Albedo's unstable mentality wouldn't be able to accept that, would it? Jr. sighed again. When had life become so complicated? It felt like only yesterday he was playing pranks on Gaignun and running down the hallway to hide with his recruited sidekick Mary.

As Jr.'s eyes adjusted to the darkness he couldn't help but notice how vulnerable Albedo appeared. He seemed so harmless asleep. It made Jr. calm, made him relax for some reason. It was true what he had said to Gaignun. He'd always had to be strong for Albedo. Albedo always needed him. It was tiring, it was stupid, it was pointless but Albedo needed him, literally needed him and he had abandoned him for all these years.

"That's stupid." Jr. said to himself. If the bastard hadn't been tormenting him all this time maybe they would've come to terms sooner, goddamnit! He began to angrily count all the horrible things Albedo had ever done to him. He was in the middle of his mental rant when he felt claws tear through his shirt. His eyes snapped to the man on him. Albedo was still asleep, having only tightened his hold on the boy. His brow was furrowed slightly and his moved lips as he whispered a small "Rubedo."

Jr.'s anger ebbed at the sight. He was the oldest. He was the leader. He should've been strong enough to have put his shit aside for Albedo. Gaignun was always trying to get him to act his age. Maybe it was time he actually did it.

* * *

"Jr.?" Gaignun had asked one night. Jr had frowned, pretending to be angry at being disturbed from one of his books.

"You've read that book a thousand times."

Jr. shook his head. "No I haven't! I've never finished it because I have a whiney-ass little brother who keeps trying to make me do work when it's so obvious that I need a break."

"You never do work, Jr." Gaignun had said, smiling.

"Yeah? Well maybe if you gave me time to finish this book then I would actually do some work."

He had turned his eyes from the words for a brief second to see the disbelief in the younger man's green eyes. "I have a very small vocabulary, Gaignun." Jr. said, articulating each syllable as he said it. "I need to expand my genius. My genius, Gaignun!"

Gaignun had laughed and picked up the book to place it on the bed beside him. "You like to act your appearance. You know that?"

"What are you even talking about?" Jr. had scoffed.

"You're a lot wiser than you act, Jr. I know you are. You just don't like to have to be serious, do you?"

Jr. sighed and rolled his eyes. "Is this the part where I admit that I've been hiding it all this time? Oh no, Gaignun! I can't believe you found out! Please, please don't tell anyone!"

He choked out fake sobs and pretended to wipe away tears.

Gaignun had sighed. "Jr., one day you're going to actually have to take responsibility again."

Guilt and unpleasant memories had consumed the boy. He turned his gaze away from Gaignun.

"I don't want to...not after..."

Jr. felt a hand on his cheek. "Jr., don't be afraid. You don't have to be afraid of anything anymore."

Jr. felt lips on his neck as his worries melt away. "Everything will be ok now. You're a lot stronger, we're a lot stronger."

"Gaignun..."

"You don't have to worry anymore. Don't be afraid of yourself, Rubedo."

Jr. had melted at the sound of his name so delicately pronounced from Gaignun's smooth voice.

"You're an ass, Gaignun."

Gaignun had smiled and climbed over the boy.

"Yes," he had started, nipping at the redhead's ear. He couldn't help but chuckle at what he was about to say. He just couldn't resist. "But you love--"

"--Say it and I swear to God, Gaignun."

"I love you, Jr." Gaignun had laughed.

"Yeah, yeah...I love you too."

* * *

Jr.'s heart ached at the memory. He tried to create a link, but stopped. Who knows what Dmirti could do with that kind of information? The thought tightened the fear in his chest even more. Gaignun wasn't ok. Gaignun needed help. Jr. stared down at the sleeping Albedo. Don't worry, Gaignun. Jr. thought to himself. He stared back up into the darkness, challenging its emptiness and the unseen future it held. He was going to get Gaignun back. He was going to save Albedo. He was going to redeem himself. It was time to, wasn't it? Relapsing was unacceptable.

"Rubedo, my Rubedo." Albedo whispered sleepily at his thoughts. "Such bold words for such a small boy. Tell me, what would your Executioner think?"

Jr. smiled to himself. "He would think that I was being stupid and that I was going to get hurt."

Albedo only nodded against the boy, curling up closer to him. "And what do you think? Is the Dragon truly as powerful as he claims?"

Jr.'s blue eyes sparkled, his voice exuded confidence. "You bet your sweet ass I am."

* * *

A/N: Whoooo. Yay. CX I hope this chapter didn't seem as random as I feel it did. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people.


	24. Resist

A/N: Oh and here we are again C: With another chapter? 0: Yes. CX With another chapter. This one's kind of long b/c I don't think I'll be able to update tomorrow with a freakin chorus concert. --; But hey, last week of school for seniors! Sweetness. CX

To my lovely, lovely reviewers:

**Ganon XD:** I understand you don't like Albedo with Jr. But guess who's going to have to get over it? XD If I tell you I love you will it help? No? Well then I hate you. XD

**Albedo's Jerusalem:** Yeah, Gaignun's a bad A. That's just who he is. Albedo is delicious, yes I totally agree with you. XD I hope you like this one.

**The Original Oxymoron: **Late reviews do not bother me and you are forgiven. You know I worship your opinion and that you of all my reviewers get special love. XD  
I'm sorry you had to go to turtoring. I remember those days. --; Good luck, though. C:

**Tualha: **Please please dear God never ever submit an anon review that starts out with the letters BJ. I know they're your initials, but really? XD Did you even think about that? (Totally being immature, but she probably didn't get the joke anyway LOL)

Oh, right. This chapter does contain a lemon. Oh that's right. XD I totally went there. Sorry Ganon-sama! :#  
I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and that is why I'm taking happy pills to keep from committing suicide.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 24  
Resist

"Albedo...please...please stop..."

"That's not what you want, Rubedo. Admit it." Albedo's mouth ran along his collarbone, making him squirm underneathe him.

"You're just too afraid." Albedo whispered against his skin. "Regulated by laws of fidelity long exstinquished with the planet."

Jr. flinched a little at the feel of Albedo's cold hands against his bare skin. "We were meant for this. This is where you belong, my Rubedo." Albedo's words ghosted along his neck as his lips captured his right ear. Jr. couldn't control himself. He gasped and arched into his twin, tangling his hands in his white hair. Albedo's touch sent electric currents through him, making him dizzy. He cried out against his ministrations. "This is how it was meant, Rubedo. We were never to have been parted, separated. Two pieces of the same being, Rubedo. This is always how it was supposed to be."

Jr. whimpered as Albedo's mouth lowered to his chest. "You can't deny it, Rubedo."

Jr. moaned as Albedo bit down on his chest. His mind was spinning, but he wasn't resisting and he wasn't fighting. He wasn't going to try. Not this time. He knew, because he could feel it resonating every time Albedo touched him, that he was right.

* * *

Albedo had finally awoken after his seemingly eternal slumber. He opened his eyes to see his desire right where he had pictured him for so long. Jr. was alseep now, but Albedo vaguely remembered talking to him. He must've fallen back asleep. Rubedo, Rubedo, he sighed to himself. So forgiving! So forgiving, so easily trapped by the words of his sin! My Rubedo. Decieving you is possibly too easy. He felt the boy move under him, starting to wake. Albedo quickly morphed into his helpless self.

"Hey Albedo?" Jr. asked softly. He gently pushed the "sleeping" man. Albedo looked up from Jr.'s stomach. "Yes, Rubedo?"

Jr. gave his brother a warm smile. "Hey."

Albedo averted his gaze downwards. "The position this puts us in seems an awkward one, Rubedo."

"Oh of course!" Jr. scoffed, rolling his eyes. "But thrusting your arm through the middle of my stomach is the most comfortable feeling in the world!"

Albedo sighed. "Rubedo, why must we play games?"

Jr. repeated Albedo's noise, surprised at how alike they sounded. "We aren't playing games and once again I have no freakin' idea what in the world you are talking about."

Jr.'s blue eyes locked on Albedo's purple ones. "I suppose you're going to just keep talking though, right? Talk and talk and talk and talk-"

Albedo cut him off with a swift kiss. "Rubedo," he whispered against his lips, "Draped in the claws of sleep realizations have arisen. Rubedo, do you not love me?"

Jr. angrily pushed Albedo off of him. "Albedo, don't start with me. I'm trying to fill the gap between us not dig a bigger ditch."

"I wish merely to thank my Sandman. Nothing is as precious as Death's brother, Sleep."

"Albedo..." Jr. said, carefully containing the rise of the fight or flight chemical that so easily was sent into turmoil. "Just...don't. Not today, please."

"My Fire, My Passion! The gift you gave me last night surely has solidified any of the many cracks threatening to throw us into chaos!"

Jr. sat alert now, suddenly wishing he hadn't done Albedo such a kindess. "And you're threatening to recreate the instability, aren't you?"

Albedo's eyes sparkled. "Oh mon précieux! My language from your tongue; sweet sweet orchestra flowing from the highest ring of heaven!"

Jr. wasn't going to let Albedo get to him. He had promised himself last night. He was going to take responsibility. He was going to redeem himself, no more relapsing. No more---

"Resist me, my sweet flower. It may be rude of me to ask..." Albedo crawled closer to his brother. "But would you give me the honor of repaying you?"

Jr.'s look was skeptical as the demented man moved toward him. "How, Albedo?"

"By making you realize your true feelings, Rubedo!"

Albedo lunged at him, holding him down. Jr.'s body shook violently, reacting angrily to the U-DO waves and causing the chemical to boil in his system. Red energy wrapped around Albedo violently. Albedo's eyes flashed. "Rubedo! It's beautiful, this feeling! However," Albedo wrapped his right glove around the boy's throat. "The beautiful red anger is not what I want from you this time."

Jr.'s hands surrounded the man's wrist, blowing it to complete nothingness, but it was back again in seconds. Jr. was trying to control his anger. One slight movement and Albedo would be completely destroyed. Quickly, Albedo plunged his hand into Jr.'s chest. The boy gasped, the energy building up stronger, creating a vortex of swirling retrovirus. The contaminated waves in Albedo's body flew from their confining prison and rushed to the boy, destroying themselves on contact. Albedo laughed crazily at the painful feeling, enjoying the reminder that he was indeed alive and loving the fact that Jr. would be the end of his immortality. Just as he always knew he would. Albedo moved his hand to wrap his claws around the leader's heart. Jr.'s eyes went wide and everything stopped. The energy swept back into Jr.'s body, leaving the attracted U-DO waves to wander around aimlessly as if lost before settling either on Albedo or the surrounding walls. They stayed that way for what seemed like hours. Jr.'s breathing turned shallow as he tried to still his heart rate as much as possible. His eyes stayed locked on Albedo's diseased ones and at the sick smile that grew wider at each pound of Jr.'s heart.

_Bastard._

"Thud, thud, Rubedo. One, two. One, two. Such a beautiful tempo. This is the time by which your seduction is kept?"

_Albedo you motherfuc-_

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. Not the way for the leader of us all to talk. Speech, Rubedo! Speech! Tell us of your troubled past. Tell me of your woes, of your worries." He gripped on Jr.'s heart hard. "Tell me, love me, as if I were your Executioner!"

Jr. gritted his teeth against the pain and gasped when Albedo loosened his grip again.

_Why are you doing this?_ Jr. asked. Confusion and hurt laced with his ever present anger flowed to the madman through their link.

Albedo's eyes softened momentarily at the feeling, but responded with dark desire as he spoke, "This is your gift Rubedo. The gift of insight into your real feelings. Let us have a look around, Rubedo. Let me find what I'm looking for."

Jr.'s eyes glazed over at the rough tug on the muscle. His breathing was rapid again as his heart rate sped. Albedo searched the emotions found there. Strong friendship, loyalty, anger, regret, guilt, those were the first he found. He dug deeper, the boy screamed but he continued. Ah! There it is. Love.

"Just relax, mon précieux . Let me show you the truth."

Jr.'s body jerked sharply.

"I love you, Jr." A smooth voice said into the darkness. "Shut up and tell me you love me."

Jr. cringed at the memory_. Stop it, Albedo. _

"Why?"Albedo asked, grinning. "Has your lust for Death waned, Dragon? No. It would seem not."

After a few more moments Albedo was becoming frustrated with Jr. No matter how far he dug, he couldn't find himself. Not even a hint of the anger felt toward him. "Well Rubedo. It would seem that this information is locked. Where is the key I wonder?"

Jr. cried out as Albedo bent lower. "The heart, useless organ; governed by the brain. Amydala, prison of my Rubedo's truth." Albedo tightened his grip on Jr.'s neck. "Show him reality!"

Jr. fought, destroying Albedo's limbs again and again, trying to stay calm and keep himself out of more trouble but Albedo was quick and regenerated at a rate that was remarkable even for the insane man. Albedo's smile darkened. "Rubedo, buried beneath all of this. Is this the truth I seek?"

Slowly, Albedo began to pull at old emotions for the boy; ones he'd kept locked away ever since their fight on Miltia. Ever since the day Albedo had tried to kill Gaignun. Jr. screamed and arched. _Stop!!_

Albedo laughed, "Mon, mon, mon Rubedo! It is true, can't you feel it? The emotion you've been hiding all this time. This desire! Mmmm! Rubedo! Rubedo!"

"It's not--"

"But it is! My sweet Rubedo! My leader, my passion!!"

Jr.'s eyes flashed a dangerous red. "I can't love a sadist, a psycho! A lunatic!"

"And that is why, Rubedo? That is why you have hidden the truth? Buried it beneath lies."

Jr.'s heart was speeding again. "My precious dragon. If I had not been victim to your folly where would I be? Would the space that occupies Nigredo's be mine?"

"No. Gaignun's spot would still be there."

"Burning the way it does? Consuming you in its fire? The source of your magic!? No! That place belongs to me! And it will be mine again! Let me reawaken your passion!"

Albedo ripped his arm from Jr.'s chest. The variant coughed violently, sitting up involuntarily in order to take in oxygen, only to cough it up again before choking on the next lungful. Blood found its way up from Jr.'s throat, staining the boy's lips. Albedo's madness echoed throughout the structure, the waves trembled, accustomed to the noise.

"You motherfucking bastard! You have no right to--"

"Ah, but I have every right, my love. My Rubedo!"

Jr. staggered off the bed and toward the monster. His body shook at the rise of the chemical again. It tore through his body, demanding escape and murder. A vicious cry emitted from the variant as it tore through the darkness, destroying everything it touched. Albedo was a little caught off guard by the assault, only barely pulling a shield of U-DO around him before the retrovirus could completely consume him. In only deflected the waves though, he knew it wouldn't save him the next time. As Jr. fell to his knees he tried hard to stop his shaking. "No more. No more. No more." He whispered over and over again. "Nomorenomorenomore!" He doubled over, hugging himself tight. "Stop!"

And everything ceased; paused in mid-movement. "Albedo..." he choked, falling to the floor. "I'm not going to kill you. I'm not going to fall for it...but why..."

Albedo was suddenly there, picking him up delicatley and whispering comforting words as if he were talking to a child. "Rubedo, you love me."

Jr. was drained. He didn't know what was happening anymore. "We belong this way." Albedo continued, setting the boy on the bed. "The rose and its thorns are one and the same. They are a part of each other, are they not?"

He crawled over him. "You can deny it. You can fight. Resist the truth, but even Nigredo knows that his time with you was stolen from me." He pulled the boy close. "You belong to me, Rubedo."

Albedo kissed him softly, loving. "Rubedo." he whispered, leaning in again and placing himself over the boy.

"Albedo..." Jr. said, trying to understand the point of the monster's attack and the new feeling awakening inside him. Albedo was lost in the boy, ignoring his sad protest. He had to do this now before the feeling was gone, while Jr. was realized, if he wanted to keep him here and away from Gaignun. His black heart jumped at the way Jr.'s lips met his. It was perfection, it was his fantasy and he would fight hell for it. "My love is a selfish love." Albedo explained as he slowly started to peel the older boy's clothes off. "And you are the only one I want." Albedo trapped the half-naked boy beneath him, kissing him softly in all the secret places Jr. hadn't even known were there.

"Albedo...please...please stop..."

"That's not what you want, Rubedo. Admit it." Albedo's mouth ran along his collarbone, making him squirm underneath him.

"You're just too afraid." Albedo whispered against his skin. "Regulated by laws of fidelity long exstinquished with the planet."

Jr. flinched a little at the feel of Albedo's cold hands against his bare skin. "We were meant for this. This is where you belong, my Rubedo." Albedo's words ghosted along his neck as his lips captured his right ear. Jr. couldn't control himself. He gasped and arched into his twin, tangling his hands in his white hair. Albedo's touch sent electric currents through him, making him dizzy. He cried out against his ministrations. "This is how it was meant, Rubedo. We were never to have been parted, separated. Two pieces of the same being, Rubedo. This is always how it was supposed to be."

Jr. whimpered as Albedo's mouth lowered to his chest. "You can't deny it, Rubedo."

Jr. moaned as Albedo bit down on his chest. His mind was spinning, but he wasn't resisting and he wasn't fighting. He wasn't going to try. Not this time. He knew, because he could feel it resonating every time Albedo touched him, that he was right.

The madman was eager. He had tried to keep himself patient, tried to make everything perfect, but if he and Jr. really were one and the same, patience wasn't something either of them had very much of. He practically ripped off his own clothes before delicatley removing the rest of Jr.'s. He was on the boy again, pressing down onto him so that their chests were flat against each other. Jr. was surprised at how close he felt to Albedo at this moment. "Intimacy defined." Albedo whispered.

_I don't want this._

_You do._

_You've tricked me._

_I've awakened you._

_Albedo..._

_Rubedo._

Albedo's hands began to knead the boy's flesh, massaging and making him squirm. He could feel Jr.'s resistance now. In every muscle of his body the boy was resisting. Minute shivers ran down his spine at every touch, but Albedo was glad that it wasn't disgust that flowed down the boy's link. Insanity ruled the Dragon as he bent down to kiss his lips. He owned the fire that burned brilliantly beneath him. This was the manifestation of his passion and Albedo was overly grateful for Jr.'s concern for humanity. If not for that he'd never get to experience this moment. He captured the boy's tongue and moved his right hand lower to grasp the boy's erection. Jr.'s moan was muffled against Albedo's mouth, dizzying even the monster with its sound. When the demon removed his mouth, a soft "Albedo." Escaped the boy's lips, thousands of conflicting emotions stood behind his name. The monster loved it. He tapped two fingers on the boy's lips. Jr. frowned in his cloud of lust, but opened his mouth anyway. Albedo started to pump the boy slowly, enjoying the shake in his twin and the moan around his fingers. Jr.'s hips bucked in Albedo's grip, urging him to go faster. He complied, picking up speed and moving his fingers from Jr.'s mouth to his entrance. Jr.'s mind protested, remembering their last encounter, but Albedo tightened his grip and the boy forgot what he had been fighting against. Albedo slipped a finger inside him, hearing the angry hiss that passed his lips. He added another and waited a moment before moving them in time with his other hand. Jr.'s body shook violently in guilty pleasure as his mind screamed incoherent protests and his body responded by ignoring every one of them.

Albedo loved the sight. His Rubedo. Yes, he was his Rubedo now. The boy cried out as he came, shaking violently from his orgasm. The madman sighed and bent down to kiss his flushed face. "My beautiful red rose." He moved a hand over the mess Jr. had made on his stomach. "Thank you for this nectar." He rubbed the substance onto himself as a makeshift lubricant. "Yes, the very essence of the sweetest flower."

Jr. didn't respond, lost in a feeling he couldn't describe. "Rubedo." Albedo whispered against the boy's soft lips. "Forgive me." He wrapped an arm around the boy's hips and lifted him for a moment before slowly entering him. Jr. groaned at the painful action. Albedo had known it was probably going to be painful, but he'd had a plan. Quickly he extracted the boy's pain, absorbing it into himself. Jr. looked at him in confused surprise. Albedo only smiled and kissed him. He continued to move slowly, knowing the need to be careful if Jr. had no pain to warn him of anything wrong. Jr. whimpered under Albedo's mouth, bucking against his older self. Albedo lowered the boy down onto the bed, placing one hand on the boy's hip and another under his neck. He held him tight, kissing whatever patch of skin was the closest, sinking into and pulling out of the boy at a rate encouraged by speeding heartbeats. Jr. was shaking, already close again. Albedo smiled against his neck. He loved this, every moment of his Rubedo. Jr.'s arms wrapped around Albedo's shoulders, trying to pull them closer together._ Albedo this is..._

_Quiet,_ _mon précieux. Don't think._

_But_

_Don't. Think_.

He wrapped his hand around the boy's restored erection, making him cry out and sending him over the edge. Albedo basked in the familar sound as Jr. crashed around him. His muscles tightened around Albedo, sending him into sweet oblivian. _Rubedo..._A few more thrusts and he was gone. He came in a flash of bright lights, catching himself before he fell on the boy. They were quiet for a few moments. Jr.'s face turned away from his brother while Albedo stared at the flush on his flower. Finally he pulled out of him and laid down beside him. "Dragon." Albedo whispered.

"Demon." Jr. hissed, still looking away.

"Mon Précieux."

"My Nightmare."

"My Light."

"My Darkness."

"My love." Albedo whispered, suddenly grave. He pulled Jr. close to him, securing him in his arms the way Jr. always had to shield him from the ridiculous fears of childhood. "My hatred."

"Is that how you see me, dear Rubedo? After this, after my proof?"

Jr. didn't answer. He was too conflicted to care about anything anymore. He just wanted to rest. He'd figure this out in the morning or when the hell ever. He would hate himself then. He would be responsible tomorrow. Right now he needed to sleep. He just needed to sleep. Albedo frowned at the worry in his dragon's thoughts. He kissed him softly, sending a wave of soothing feeling to the little boy. Jr. wanted to resist it, but he couldn't. It felt too good. He embraced it instead and Albedo smiled, happy for the first time in a long time; truly happy. He watched his Rubedo fall asleep and hoped silently that it wouldn't be the last time they'd be this close.

* * *

A/N: Whoo. CX Death is imminent. I understand. But I just love both couples so much. I don't even know which one I like better anymore. Who do you guys like? C: Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people.

Oh! Right! I forgot. Someone asked about the meaning of Albedo's French. I can't believe how rude I was. ^^; Lemme explain.

Mon Précieux- My precious  
Sans Valuer- Worthless  
Dirait-on- So They Say  
Ménage à trois- threesome  
Partie à quatre-foursome.

Sorry. ^^; Rude rude rude of me. Forgiveness? C:


	25. Submit

A/N: Huh? What's this? An update? Could it possibly be!? XD Yes, yes it is. Now I know you all thought I was dead. But I am in fact, very alive. XD Sorry for the late chapter. It just felt good to do nothing but be absolutely useless and lazy to the world. Anyway, I've kept you waiting long enough. Next chapter!

To **Lucrecia LeVari:**I appreciate your thorough criticism. It makes me feel special. XD And I'm very sorry that I can not spell, but I have no spell check and didn't even know this site had one until a couple of days ago when I was complaining about how bad I spell and someone was like "...You know it has spellcheck, right?" --; So thank you very much for that.

And I guess I have to thank Tuahla too. And you can tell I meant it this time, I actually stopped to spell your name. XD

Now, ass-kissing officially done. On with the fic!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters, but at least I can spell that much. XDDD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 25  
Submit

Nigredo ran or perhaps he flew. Yes, flight was a better description. The planet was dark; constantly covered by a thin layer of acrid smoke accompanied by the continuous sound of gunfire. Death.

"They're all infected!" Nigredo whispered awed despair. Everywhere he turned was chaos. U.R.T.V.'s roamed the streets in the strict marching lines taught for battle. They destroyed buildings, set off bombs and murdered everyone in sight. It was Miltia's extermination.

"Rubedo!" he screamed, "Rubedo where are you!?"

_Dammit, answer me! Rubedo! Answer me!_

He couldn't even remember how the two had been separated. After Albedo's infection, everything was a blur of vision and shouts of "Run, Nigredo!" along with the feel of Rubedo's hand on his arm, screams, insane laughter...And then that song. That damned song! It's haunting sound was driving everyone crazy! The U.R.T.V.'s that had not been contaminated found themselves bent over as they wrapped their hands around their heads at the noise as the disease of U-DO leaked its way into their minds through the song. Nigredo stared in horror at the fall of every one of his brothers and at the momentary fear as sanity slipped away through their screams. The power of this song was terrifying. Everything was falling under its traumatizing melody. Realians covered the streets, laughter like weapons as they ripped apart anything within reach living or not. The infected bio-weapons and artificial humans ignored him as he ran, thinking that he was among their own ranks. Even after he machine-gunned a few of his infected siblings to save a citizen, they ignored him and continued their spree. He counted them off. 001, 002...387...564...633...Every single one of them infected. The realization scared him. If Albedo could be affected did that mean Rubedo could to?

"Rubedo!" he shouted again. "Rubedo! Where are you!?''

He wasn't sure how long he had been searching. It felt like an eternity. He mapped his way through the chaos, mindful of bombs and enemy gunfire. What grim humor. Wasn't everyone an enemy? "Rubedo!" he cried out again, his sore throat protested against the action. Nothing. _Rubedo! Answer me!_

_Nigredo. _

Nigredo stopped in his tracks. He had found his way onto a deserted street. No one was here; the space clear of everything but corpses. _Who are you looking for Nigredo? I think I know._

_Albedo?_

_My Rubedo. Do you know his whereabouts? It seems he fled with you. Are you running away without me?_

_Albedo. Where are you?_

"Why I'm right here, Nigredo!" Nigredo turned around to see Albedo. The purple-red waves enveloped the older boy, wrapping around him and causing his eyes to flash a violent lighter purple.

"Al-Albedo...you're..."

Albedo laughed at his hesitance. Nigredo took a few steps away from him, holding his weapon loosely at his side. "Left me for dead, Nigredo. You aren't a very good brother."

Albedo walked closer, one hand outstretched to rest on his shoulder. Nigredo flinched, unsure of what exactly he should do. This situation screamed danger, but Nigredo couldn't bring himself to actually harm his brother, not Albedo. The older boy, however, didn't seem to share the same inhibitions. With surprising speed and force, Albedo kicked his legs out from under him. The moment Nigredo landed he stomped down hard on his right leg. Albedo smiled at the scream that ripped from the younger boy. Pain pushed past his inhibition. He grabbed his gun and rammed the butt of the weapon into Albedo's stomach and hit it against his face. The force knocked him down. Nigredo shifted his weight to his side, trying to use the gun as a prop, but Albedo kicked him again and sent him onto the pavement again. Albedo smiled and grabbed the gun.

"Trickery, trickery. It was always something you were good at, Nigredo." He tapped the barrel against the boy's cheek. "Rubedo, Rubedo, where for art thou, Rubedo?" The boy laughed insanely. "Is that the call of Juliet I hear, wandering around in the dark? Toying with madness, Nigredo, is never a good thing."

"Albedo, what are you talking about? What are you doing?"

Albedo dug a heel into the boy's broken leg. "And now who plays the part of Paris? Why not me? If he'd been smart, if he'd realized that woman as the true executioner, maybe they could've lived."

"Albedo, you're not making any sense." Nigredo cried out. He started a small link, but Albedo felt the telekinesis behind it and fired a round into Nigredo's left arm and leg. The link shut down as fast as it had started, lost in the realm of pain. "The executioner! The woman. If not for her self induced death, Romeo would not have committed suicide, would not have killed Paris. That's what you wish of me, isn't it Nigredo?"

Nigredo tried to think through his haze but Albedo interrupted him. "Yes! It is! Death for Rubedo! You've fallen, Executioner! Broken your promise! To save his Juliet, the Dragon will kill me. Then what? You him, Nigredo? The way it was meant, wasn't it? Shakespeare! The great foreseer!"

"I haven't done anything, Albedo! Stop this please!" Albedo responded by stomping again on his broken leg. Nigredo whimpered in pain. He felt the barrel against his head.

"Albedo!!!"

The demon's head snapped up. "Ah, there art Romeo. With such purpose doth he walk. Romeo, your Juliet is dying. Where doth thy poison lie?"

"Get off of him!" Nigredo could hear his feet hitting the pavement. Albedo cocked his head to the side and raised the gun to point at the running variant. "Stop!"

Albedo's arms exploded, the gun landing on the ground behind him. He hissed in surprise. Nigredo was surprised too, he'd simply reacted, instinct without thinking of the consequence. Albedo's limbs reformed themselves and he again grabbed the gun. He pressed the barrel roughly against Nigredo's stomach.

"Albedo!"

"Rubedo! You left me! You promised you wouldn't leave me! You promised! But you took Nigredo to save him, didn't you!? What about me!? What about me!?"

"Albedo, don't do it! Don't do it!"

Albedo grinned, "Shall I believe that unsubstantial Death is amorous?" The barrel dug into Nigredo's suit. "And that the lean abhorred monster keeps thee here in the dark to be his paramour?"

"Albedo, please..." Rubedo begged.

"Goodnight Nigredo."

* * *

Gaignun shot up in bed, screaming. His breathing was heavy as he scanned the dark room.

"What is it?" Jr. yelled beside him. He leaned over Gaignun, a gun in his hand.

"It's...It's nothing." He said, shaking his head. "Just a nightmare."

A sigh, "Jeez, Gaignun. You gave me a fucking heart attack." He heard the boy fall back onto their bed. Gaignun didn't join him. He bent over, holding his head in his palms and resting his elbows on knees. He took a deep breath.

"Gaignun?"

"I'm fine..."

He felt a hand on his back. "Hey."

"Yeah?"

He felt a shift in the bed and then arms around his shoulders. "Come on, let's go back to bed."

"Jr..." he sighed, placing a hand over one of Jr.'s smaller ones. "That dream felt so real. Like it was happening again."

"Well hey, it's over right? Besides, I won't let anything bad happen to you."

Gaignun smiled. "Right. My little gunslinger."

"Gaignun, if you wanted me to kick your ass, all you had to do was ask me."

"Didn't you just say you'd protect me?"

"I meant from other people. When it comes to me, you're on your own."

Gaignun nodded an of course and ran his hand up Jr.'s arm. Was it strange for him to actually feel safe in arms so small? His hand traveled up to the boy's shoulder and back down, stopping on the tattoo he knew was there. "Jr., when was the first time you told me you loved me?"

Jr. sighed. "When the Feds came to take me away."

Gaignun kissed the arm he held. "Yeah. That's right."

"Damn right it's right."

Gaignun chuckled. "Yeah, but you know what's wrong?"

"The fact that you're a girl? See, I've always known this and it's taken me a while, but I've finally come to terms with it."

"You're wrong."

He felt the arms around him stiffen. "You're not my Jr. You're not real. This isn't real."

Gaignun tilted his head to rest on the boy behind him. "And it's pathetic that I want you to be real. And it's even more pathetic that I'm not going to give in to this even though you're right here." Gaignun closed his eyes and ran his hand over Jr.'s skin again. "This is his arm, this is his voice, his breath on my skin. It's him. I can feel him."

Gaignun opened his eyes again to the surrounding darkness. "And I'm almost willing to believe you. But I can't."

His imaginary Jr. moved his arms from around his shoulders and crawled around him to sit in front of him. "Gaignun. Where is Jr. right now?"

"He's with Albedo." Gaignun answered, trying to ignore how strange it was that Jr. was talking about Jr.

"With Albedo and you're not worried?"

"Of course I'm worried! There's no telling what's happening! The last time Albedo took him away from me he came back broken and bleeding. It was terrifying."

"So you're worried about pain."

"What else is there to worry about? Albedo's not going to kill him..."

The imitation shook his head. "What does Albedo want from him? Truly want from him?"

Gaignun didn't know what the replica was getting at, so he thought about it for a moment before answering. "He wants Jr. to kill him."

"Is that all?"

Gaignun frowned. "No..."

The copy smiled sadly. "If Jr. had to choose, if he really had a choice who would he pick, Gaignun?"

Gaignun didn't answer. He kept his eyes down on the thick comforter covering his legs.

"Do you know the answer or are you unsure?"

"Albedo...Albedo is a part of Jr. A literal part. I don't know...I don't know what..."

Gaignun's heart tightened. He'd never really thought about it, never really had to. He'd never thought he'd be with Jr. to begin with so that had thrown everything he'd known into a new sort of pattern. Anything seemed possible now and depending on the things Albedo said or did...

"If Albedo could even fake sanity, Jr. would drop you like a rock."

"That's not...that's not true, Jr. loves me."

"But are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?"

Gaignun was silent again as he tried to convince his heart that there was no reason to break. He was sure Jr. loved him. He'd said it in his own words, said it in his touch, in his eyes, in everything about him...hadn't he?

He was battling now, fighting with himself for the answer when the impostor placed a hand against his cheek.

"But I wouldn't. I love you, Gaignun. Take me instead. Here, I'm everything you want me to be. Here, this world is perfect and here there exists no Albedo."

Gaignun shook his head. "No. No. This isn't real. Even if the real Jr. chose Albedo over me it's reality. Without reality, without structure nothing tangible exists. Just a world full of delusion. Albedo."

"Why do you always have to be so self destructive? Why can't you just be happy? Do something for yourself for once. Think about you, Gaignun. What's best for you?"

Jr.'s hand moved from Gaignun's cheek to his neck as he pulled himself to sit inbetween Gaignun's legs.

"Dmitri's so good at this." Gaignun sighed, depressed. "He knows just what to make you say."

"He doesn't want you to suffer he wants you to be happy." The replica reasoned. "That's why he constructed this world for you. A gift to his favorite son."

"Favorite son?"

Jr. nodded enthusiastically. "His absolute favorite son. His greatest achievement. He even views Albedo as a failure."

Gaignun couldn't hide the perverse sense of satisfaction that gave him. No matter what Albedo did or how horrible it would the action was, Jr. would forgive him, but no matter how hard Gaignun tried he would never amount to what Albedo actually meant to Jr, would he? Doomed to exist always in shadow.

"I love you Gaignun. Our father loves you." The imitation was closer now, their lips inches apart. "Don't you want to make him proud?"

Gaignun fell against the feeling. Sanity slowly slipping away from its carefully structured confines. For once in his life he didn't care. Maybe he should do something for himself. Maybe he did deserve to be happy and maybe submitting to this reality wasn't so bad. He'd made his decision. As Jr. pulled away to fix him in crudely colored eyes Gaignun whispered, "I do."

* * *

A/N: Yayy! CX Hope this was decent considering the super long wait. ^^; Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people. C:


	26. In Motion

A/N: Well look who it is. On Memorial Day even! XD Yes, after a day of family and hamburgers, hot dogs, and Napolean Dynamite why shouldn't I be able to relax and finish this chapter? This chapter deals with setting Dmitri's plans into motion, or the beginnings anyway. It's strange not to have a chapter filled with Jr and someone, so there's a section at the end but other people are important too, right? XD

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters or Napolean Dynamite, but the latter has nothing to do with anything so let's get started. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 26  
In Motion

chaos was a ball of nerves. Not in the way that way that would make him jump at everything that moved, but in the way that made him alert to everything around him.

"So what's the plan?" Canaan deadpanned.

"We're taking Asher." chaos responded, making his way carefully through the Durandal. "'Gaignun' won't let us go with them, so we'll make our own way."

"And the Elsa's not sufficient."

chaos grinned. "It is, but convincing Captain Matthews to go against any orders from Gaignun with a debt that big is very...unlikely."

Canaan nodded. "I see and where exactly is Nigredo?"

chaos sighed as they exited the transport. "I don't know. But..."

The Hangar was gigantic, but it wasn't hard to pick Jr.'s E.S. out from the rows of expensive A.G.W.S. and A.M.S. "All I know is that Dmitri is back and that can't be good, Canaan. They need us again."

Canaan raised an eyebrow at the boy, "And I'm helping you because...?"

chaos smiled, "Because you're the only one besides Jr. who can pilot this craft. It makes you vital to this 'operation'" Canaan made an irritated noise when he felt chaos' hand on his shoulder. "Besides, we both know that you're not as emotionless as you're supposed to be. You're worried about Jr. just as much as I am."

Canaan shrugged, "No, actually I couldn't be more apathetic."

"Curious?"

"Not even the slightest bit."

"...Adventurous?"

"Nope."

"Bored?"

"Possibly."

"Well, I'll take it." chaos laughed and took a few steps toward the machine. "You ready, Canaan?"

The Realian looked from the E.S. to chaos. Well, it'd get him out of the UMN Control Center for a little while. He pulled the old E.S. containment unit he'd brought and pointed it at the machine. He hadn't been sure if something so outdated would work on the machine, but it did. A bright light flashed as the machine disappeared into its metallic container.

"Well." chaos laughed in his smooth, quiet voice, "If that's not a yes, then I don't know what is."

* * *

Dmitri was extremely pleased with the way things were playing out. True, the Y-data in that small prototype hadn't been accessed yet and without the UMN column open, Miltia and the Zohar he needed would still be locked away. But that was acceptable. For the moment it was acceptable. He had nothing but time and intiating his plan wouldn't be an obstacle at all, especially if he could get rid of the nuisance of his sons. Yes, this would all go along smoothly. He walked around the Durandal masquerading as his son and even talking politely to anyone he spoke with. Got to keep up that image.

"Master Gaignun." Mary called as the elevator brought him to the bridge.

"Mary, Shelley, I have wonderful news."

Mary ran over to him while Shelley simply turned to face him from her seat.

"I have found the coordinates that will lead us to Jr."

"Master Gaignun! That's fantastic!" Mary ran back to her place on the captain's deck. "All 100-series, sub-channel into the Durandal's mainframe! Get these coordinates down and track the Little Master!"

Shelley began to contact the UMN in order to gain clearance and to program their destination while Dmitri searched the link Jr. had tried to create earlier. He smiled to himself. He was better at controlling their link than even Rubedo. He nodded and started rattling off numbers and directions.

"Rough estimate." He said as he finished. "But it's better than nothing."

"Yes," Shelley said, giving him a small smile. "Any slight clue is very important."

"I want the Durandal launched immediately." He turned quickly and headed for the elevator.

"Master Gaignun?" Mary asked, "Where are you going?"

"I have some urgent business to attend to. Contact me as soon as you get to the destination. I'll arrive shortly."

Mary nodded worriedly, but turned back to the activity. They never questioned Gaignun. Dmitri smiled to himself. Definitely too easy. He made his way quickly to the dock, passing swiftly through the bustle of people as they hurried this way and that to prepare for launch. The Realian at the transport gate was about to lock it when Dmitri placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Excuse me."

"Master Gaignun. We're about to leave..." The Realian started, a little surprised.

"Yes, I know." He moved past her through the gate. "Please be careful."

The Realian watched in confusion as Dmitri made his way to the transport and exited the Durandal.

Dmitri smirked at the sight of Second Miltia. It seemed so cheap, so unrealistic. He shrugged. It didn't matter. As he made his way through the planet he couldn't help but notice the looks he was receiving. He was confused by this at first, but then remembered who's appearance he was currently "wearing". He started to form the practiced smile Gaignun had so easily constructed. It seemed contagious, causing more excited and perhaps star-struck ones to appear on the people around him. He was sort of taken-a-back by how eagerly friendly these people seemed to be. He chalked that up to his son's fame.

"Dr. Yuriev?"

Gaignun's smile was abandoned and replaced by a look of surprise as he turned his head to the voice.

"Dr. Dmitri Yuriev?"

"Citrine." He answered pleasantly in his own voice.

"Youth suits you." An air of superiority radiated off of her at her approach. Not toward Yuriev, but towards all the people staring strangely at the two and wondering why Gaignun would be so close to another woman without his mistresses around.

"Yes. Though it suits everyone I would suppose."

Citrine snickered, "Perhaps. Though it doesn't seem to agree with these people."

She was military in an area full of civilians. She looked around haughtily in her uniform that was probably too warm to be wearing out in the brilliant sun of that day. All smooth corners and arrogance. Such structure and attention; perfection. Just like Nigredo. He watched her hazel eyes scan the hungry gazes of the people around them.

"Your forces are ready and awaiting orders, Dr. Yuriev. The Salvator Faction has effectively infiltrated Vector, U-TIC, Ormus, and the Federation. Anything else will be accomplished if commanded."

Dmitri nodded. "Acceptable. No movement yet. We have plenty of time and if everyone is on standby we can move at our leisure."

Citrine nodded and lifted her head at the sound of the Durandal's departure. This seemed to agitate the onlookers more. Whatever could Gaignun be doing with such a strange woman all by himself? Citrine smiled at the thought. "It seems Nigredo's admirers have something against me."

Dmitri turned his head slightly to see them gossiping. "Hm. Yes. It would appear so."

He pretended to look around, feigning a worried glance before holding his hand out toward the U.R.T.V. It wasn't the action itself that raised eyebrows, but the grace in the motion that suggested the bio-weapon was an elegant lady. His eyes, when he turned back to her,showed no sigh of the faux worry, only supreme confidence.

"Well then," he said, motioning his head slightly to the curious crowd. "Let's give them something to talk about, shall we?"

* * *

"There they go." chaos sighed, watching the last of the Durandal's engines leave port.

"Yeah." Canaan answered, arms crossed.

chaos sighed at the apathy in his voice. "How long do we wait here?" Canaan asked.

"Hey chaos! Get over here! We've got a delivery to make for Master Gaignun and I don't want it to take five million years! Tony! That means you too! Quit screwin' around with that girl and get your ass in here!"

chaos turned to see the Elsa's captain grumbling and pulling at his hat as he walked into the ship, Tony cursing silently behind him.

"So am I a stow-away or am I actually invited to this little 'party' of yours, chaos? What have you told the captain?"

chaos smiled beautifully. "Well see, I was worried about that part. I estimate that it will take us a good four hours if that to get to our destination. The captain's a stickler for schedules only because he wants to get everything done so that he can...enjoy the scenery, nothing else. They won't notice that I'm missing so I'll be able to sneak out."

chaos started to make his way to the Elsa. Canaan walked with him. "That doesn't really answer the question." he stated.

"No it doesn't." chaos walked to the door and stood there for a moment. "I _was_ worried, but the captain owes me a favor or two...or maybe a little more." he added, humor in his voice, "All the nights I've spent leading them back to the Elsa after their "sight-seeing". I don't think he'll mind if you tag along."

"As long as I cover the fee?"

chaos laughed. "Something like that."

Canaan hadn't been inside the Elsa since it had been remodeled and even he had to admit, it was impressive. "So Nigredo's vast wealth decided to spill over to the small freighter."

Everything looked so new, so modern, but it still held something of the Elsa's old charm. Charm? Canaan smirked. Is that what they had called it? "Was this a favor to the captain? Surely some of these new pieces were extremely expensive. Did this perhaps dent some of the debt owed by the captain?"

chaos smiled involuntairly, "It was more of a thank you present."

"Thank you present?" Canaan asked.

"I did something for Jr. and he thought this fitting."

"Upgrading the Elsa? That's your reward?" Canaan asked as if the idea was sort of ridiculous. The two made their way through the interior. Everything shone, reflecting warped images of the two on the walls and floors. New droids worked tirelessly on their programmed routines to keep everything perfect. Advancement reigned the Elsa, making it something worthy of the cruise-lining it had left behind in the exchange from Gaignun to the Captain. They passed the refurbished cabins to the bridge. Elegant.

"Jr. has his ways." chaos answered at they rounded the rising floor to the bridge's doors. "And yes," The doors slid open and closed as they headed to the second set, "It did make a dent, but I don't think either Jr. or Gaignun actually expect the captain to be able to pay it all back."

He paused before the second doors, "But it keeps the captain on his toes, doesn't it?"

Canaan nodded at the boy's smile and as soon as the doors opened he heard a shout.

"chaos, it's about time! Hey, what's that guy doing here?"

"Well, better start asking for favors." Canaan noted.

"Hey captain," chaos started, "I was wondering..."

* * *

Albedo was silent in the darkness. He could feel motion from the outside world. Shifts in space caused a reaction of the waves in his domains Jr. was fast asleep. He had been for a while now but Albedo couldn't be sure how long exactly. Not that he cared. Jr. was absolutley right, time meant nothing to him. Or at least, when Jr. wasn't with him. "But it should mean nothing to you, either mon précieux."

The boy stirred but didn't wake and Albedo decided to be quiet and let him sleep. In sleep, Jr. didn't fight him. In sleep Jr. was his, truly his. Sometime during Jr.'s sleep, Albedo had pulled the boy on top of him, cradling the boy's head against his shoulder. He loved being close to him like this. Every heartbeat, every breath, every small noise made in sleep that vibrated his chest belonged to Albedo. This is how he wanted to spend eternity. This right here. But they were coming, weren't they? His arms tightened around the small body against him. Nigredo...He had promised hadn't he? To save Gaignun. And he'd given up his ownership of the boy a long time ago. He'd been hoping that something would change. He could leave. He could take Jr. and leave somewhere no one would find them. He could keep him forever. Immortals in a haven, away from everything and anything. Especially Gaignun and Dmitri; the harbringers of death the variant so eagerly threw himself towards. That wouldn't work, would it? He'd promised. It doesn't matter, he screamed to himself. What's a promise among countless lies and betrayals? What's one broken word against an eternity with this boy? Everything else be damned! But it wouldn't get him what he wanted.

"Albedo?" Jr. asked. His voice was hoarse with sleep.

"They're coming, Rubedo."

"What?"

Albedo held him even tighter. "Death for the Dragon."

"Gaignun?"

"His skin." Albedo said, correcting him. "I believe Nigredo's lost in his own temple."

"Yuriev." Jr. hissed. He tried to push himself up, but Albedo wouldn't release him. "Don't start this shit, Albedo. You said you'd help me. I can't do this without you, but if you won't help me..."

"Rubedo, relax. It is fruitless to jump when there is a bridge to cross. Wait with me, Rubedo. Let me enjoy this."

"Albedo, there's no time."

"There is infinite time!" His voice surprised Jr., but only helped to fuel his anger. They stared at each other angrily both waiting for the other to make a move. "Death will take you soon, delivered by my own hand. Until then you have no choice. Nothing is as precious as this time. Nigredo's time is limited only by his mortality. His place within you is eternal. My place is but temporary."

Jr.'s eyes softened, but he was still tense and guarded. "I'm not falling for it again, Albedo."

It was strange how the delusion he had been existing in seemed to wane under that gaze. It was strange too how he suddenly wanted reality if it meant Jr. would accept him. But a piece of him held onto delusion, it wasn't something he could give up. His addiction to this strength was all he had against his fear.

"Do my heartbeats deceive me or you, Rubedo? Is it perhaps only your mind that refuses the honesty in my words? Speech upon speech I must give. Oozing like blood do they pour, only to fall on deaf ears. My Rubedo," Albedo placed a hand softly against the back of the boy's neck. He kept the other arm draped protectively around his waist, keeping him still. "Whisper to me words of the darkest kind. Music in their monotony. Secrets in their pause. Lust in their undertone and love in their daws. Hypnotize me, Rubedo. Just as you always have. Allow me my rightful place, open up to me."

Jr. sighed, "Albedo..." his voiced sounded pained. "Why do you make me do these things? What are you trying to prove...?"

_You know what. It thrives in the very depths of your existence. You are mine, Rubedo._

_The only bond between us_...Jr. sent, looking away. _Is the bond broken when we were separated._

_And there's been a need, hasn't there, Rubedo? Do you not think of me? Wish for me? Want of me?_

_To protect you! Only to be sure you're ok! _He defended angrily.

_The motive, your reason for being so worried? So guarding of the horrible existence of your demon, your nightmare, your darkness, your hatred?_

_Because I...you've always needed me...it's just..._

_Habit, dear Rubedo? _

_No it's..._

Albedo grinned and leaned up to capture the boy's lips. _Hush Rubedo, lest your greatest kept secret be set free to all hungry ears and curious minds. Let me enjoy your resistance. Remembering you so vulnerable would surely ruin my image of the powerful dragon._

The man pulled back and relaxed himself onto the twisted bed. Jr. felt him sigh underneath him as the lunatic retreated into his mind. Jr. stayed silently in his position for a few moments before lowering himself back onto his twin. Albedo was extremely pleased by the action and changed his hold from protective to loving as he cradled the boy.

"Rubedo, my rose, you're so terribly addicting."

"Shut up," Jr. replied, snuggling closer, "You think too loud."

* * *

A/N: Yay! See? I told you everyone was important. Especially chaos. He's always important. XD Hope that didn't suck too hard. ;P You know who to tell if it did. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. I hope everybody had a fantastic Memorial Day!


	27. Coaxing Insanity

A/N:I'm so so so so so so sorry for such a late update. I've been so busy with Class Night and Graduation, but now that all of that is finally over, I've been able to update. I hope the wait was worth it. C:

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters but when I take over the world I will. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 27  
Coaxing Insanity

"Mon, mon, mon, Rubedo." Albedo sighed, buttoning the ends of his cape onto his suit.

"What?" Jr. asked, venom in his voice. He pulled on his jacket roughly and looked around for his pants. Albedo smirked and sat down next to him. He leaned over and ran a clawed glove under Jr.'s chin.

"So close they tread. Mere moments from destination. Let us hurry, shall we?"

He handed Jr. what he was looking for and the boy snatched them away. He turned his back to his brother and started angrily pulling them on. He pulled them up but lost his balance and fell backwards onto the bed. Albedo laughed and looked down at him. "Such fire, Dragon. The very heat that tempers the blade of my heart."

Albedo turned around to face him and slowly climbed over him. Before Jr. could protest he placed his hands forcefully on the boy's shoulders. Albedo leaned over him, placing delicate kisses on his chest. "Albedo." Jr. warned.

Albedo nodded, "Yes, I am aware."

He made his way down Jr.'s neck to his chin. "I must admit, dear Rubedo." He reached the boy's lips. "I have thoroughly enjoyed being the 'other man' in this ménage à trois."

He leaned those few inches closer to capture Jr.'s lips in one last long passionate kiss.

"The very essence of Heaven." He pulled away and moved a hand from Jr.'s shoulder to the zipper on his pants. Jr. jerked but Albedo simply pulled it up and buttoned the top for him.

"Let us go, Rubedo."

* * *

Gaignun would've loved to have said that this perfect world was well...perfect. But he just couldn't. Everything was too fake, too unrealistic. A world without flaws just hid the problem. It was something he could hide behind to pretend that it didn't exist and as much as he loved waking up to a happy, healthy Jr. and all the immature pranks that accompanied him, it just wasn't right. All the missing imperfections magnified the fact that this world wasn't real.

"Jr. I can't do this anymore." He would say when his thoughts wandered down this same track. How many times had it said that very sentence? Was this the first or the fifteenth? He'd lost count but it never failed to distress the replica. As if those were the magic words he would watch the sudden shift from the programmed Jr. into Dmitri eager to silence his protesting son. So he was careful this time. He would choose his words delicately as he tried to catch his father off-guard.

He waited until his imitation was comfortable and relaxed, thinking it would be so much easier to decieve him that way.

"Tch. Look at that, Gaignun. Pathetic." Jr. laughed.

They sat at a table close to the Smiley Bakery on their Foundation. Gaignun loved it here. The people here didn't melt at his appearance. Both in this reconstructed world and in reality they acknowledged him in a friendly manner, as if he were one of their own. He missed it, even now as he was trying to escape it. The air, the people, the ridiculous King and his mob. The small cat that the mob boss so carefully watched over ran down the stairs, causing the blond menace to call after him in a ridiculous whining tone. He smiled fondly at the world and looked over to the boy Jr. had been talking about. Johnny sat hiding around the corner watching Mina talk and serve customers. Gaignun smiled. "Pathetic? How so?"

"He's just obsessing. If he'd grow a damn backbone talk to her then maybe something would happen. He's just going to look stupid."

"You don't think it's kind of sweet?"

Jr. rolled his eyes. "No. I do not. He's stalking her, Gaignun. Can't he get into trouble for that?"

"Can't we get into trouble for this?" Gaignun reached across the table to pull him close.

"We could..." Jr. responded.

And just like that Gaignun had him trapped. At times it really did seem as if he was programmed, switching into different modes whenever the mood called for it or whenever Gaignun's tone changed. This Jr. seemed a little too willing for Gaignun.

"Jr.," He started, thinking very carefully, "I think we should leave the Foundation for a little while."

"Why?" Jr. asked, but it wasn't the surprised or upset tone that the boy would've used. It was a simple question from an adoring servant.

Gaignun sighed dramatically for the impostor. "I've grown...tired of this place already. Let's go somewhere new."

The imitation squirmed unhappily. "Something wrong with my decision? Do you wish to stay here?"

"Well, Gaignun...you know, I really like it here. I thought you liked it here too."

Gaignun tilted his head to one side, as if in deep thought. He could so very easily destroy this image's mind, but Dmitri would intervene and Gaignun didn't need that right now, not if he was going to attempt escape. It would have to be something subtle, something surprising, something not even Dmitri would be prepared for.

"What do you like best here, Jr.? What is it about this place that's so amazing to you?" He deftly slipped a hand into his left pocket. The replica was relaxed and carefree at the moment and didn't notice the smooth motion.

"You know, Jr.," Gaignun whispered in his velvety voice. "Johnny and Mina have been together for a while now. Have you forgotten the paper-rock-scissors contest you came home talking about?"

"Oh right. Must've slipped my mind."

In an instant the world was updated. The pre-Gnosis attack Foundation vanished and everything was correct again. "It's alright. You seem tired."

"That's because I am. What of it?"

Ah, there it was. It was forced however, and the imitation slumped against Gaignun's side. "Maybe I'll take a nap."

"You do that, Jr."

Gaignun wrapped an arm around the boy and held him close. This was going to be so hard. Already he could feel the hesitation in the way his hand shook. He had plenty of time to prepare emotionally for this, but he couldn't prepare too thoroughly. Dmitri would be able to feel him if he had. Quickly, so that none of his intention would be spread to the unknowing doctor, Gaignun pulled out a palm-sized laser gun and held it to the imitation's temple. He thought he should say something. Sorry or anything to that affect, but words left him as he pulled the trigger.

* * *

Dmitri couldn't stop him. The force was incredible. The doctor balked at the rush against his skull. It was impossible, this pain. It kept pounding and pounding.

"Dammit," he hissed, "Citrine!"

But she wasn't in the room with him. Gaignun pressed harder, gaining a little more control with each strike. An onslaught of ringing electricity assailed the scientist, immobilizing him.

_Thought you could keep me from fighting back?_

Dmirti groaned against another blast and fell shaking, to the floor. He tried to push himself up, but Gaignun was quick to push him down.

_I want this body back. I want it back now._

Dmitri continued to struggle, trying desperately to gain footing against Gaignun's violent attacks. The control he had was lost and slowly he found himself slipping into familiar caged territory.

_Dear father, I think it is you who needs some rest. Can't have all that straining at your age._Gaignun mocked.

He waited until there was no trace of the scientist before he pushed himself up from the floor. He slowly began to regain his vision and when he lifted his hand to his throbbing head he was elated to find himself finally free. His legs pushed against the ground to lift him at his command. His breath became shallow or deep whenever he willed it. He smiled. Now he needed to focus on what to do next. With Dmitri under his control, he was able to figure out just exactly what the doctor was planning and the Durandal was flying right into his trap. There was no time to think, only to act. He searched his pockets for his connection gear, but it wasn't there. Swiftly he made his way through the unfamiliar room and into the hallways of a strange building. He needed to get to some sort of service module or communications booth. For a split second he thought about just leaving and heading toward the U.M.N. Control Center or perhaps to the Second Miltian Parliament where he could plead to Helmer. The constant threat of Dmitri just barley under his surface pushed him to stay in this building, however. No time to think, no time to think, no time to think. He focused all of his mental power on Dmitri's imprisonment. He walked around hurriedly, perhaps drawing more attention to himself than he would've liked, but he didn't have a choice. After countless corners and corridors he found a small communications room. Once inside he began to mindlessly work his fingers across the keyboard. Searching...searching...damn! He didn't have time to waste. He let up on his hold over his father. It was just enough to connect with Jr., just enough for the smallest link, but he felt the strength of Dmitri's struggle and quickly closed it down to contain him. He cursed under his breath. Was this escape in vain? Contact, perfect. Someone would answer his transmission, it was only a matter of seconds. Gunfire. He pulled back from the console in despair as white noise resounded from the dissipating screen. His head snapped quickly to the door. Light from the outside hallway leaked into the dark room. The silhouette of a woman blocked the illumination, only her hazel eyes and the blue light from a laser gun shone brightly in the dark. Citrine.

She cocked her head to the side curiously. "Doctor?" She pointed her gun toward Gaignun. "Nigredo?"

He stood frozen in place trying to both search for a plan of either attack or escape while holding onto his father. She took a few more steps toward him, cautiously.

"This is a predicament. Dr. Yuriev called for me. Is that you or were you trying to sneak away with our father in-tow?"

Calm was a stranger to Gaignun as panic took over. "Either way," she continued, nonchalant. She walked closer to him, causing him to back up at her advance. She continued forward until she reached the broken console. Slowly, she placed the gun in her hand onto the table. "I can't shoot you since you are his vessel."

Gaignun couldn't think, couldn't allow the mental space for it. He started to form words, but he could feel himself beginning to slip away again. He shook his head violently. "No. I'm not."

Citrine nodded in mock agreement. "That's why you're falling, isn't it?"

Gaignun shook his head again. "I'm not falling, I'm--"

"How did it feel, Nigredo?"

Green eyes sharply met hazel. "Even if he was just a fabrication, the stimulation, what was it like?"

She was trying to distract him long enough to give Dmitri time to claw his way to the surface. Gaignun fought the urge to respond. He hadn't gained so much just to lose control again. Citrine acted, swiftly grabbing the nearest arm and twisting it behind his back. "Did you like it, Nigredo? Wasn't it fulfilling?"

He reached behind him and grabbed the collar of her uniform, pulling her from behind him to slam her against the closest wall. "You don't have to do this." Gaignun spoke, his voice strained.

"And what am I to do, Nigredo? Become one of the Kukia clan?" She smiled, "Deny my existence and trick a sleeping Rubedo after I use him as I see fit?"

She raised a fist against him, but he caught her and caught her leg as she moved to kick him. He twisted the leg in his hand, flipping her over and landing her on her hand and knees on the floor. She knocked his legs out from under him, sending him on his back. She was on him at once, pinning his arms under her knees and wrapping her hand around his throat. From her pocket she pulled a short, blunt, Elcair rod which she placed against his throat in place of her fingers. "How did you do it, Nigredo? Was it by gunpoint? Did you make him beg?" Gaignun shook his head, trying to stay focused. He tried to shift her weight, but the pressure she was applying was too much. "Did he cry? No, that doesn't sound like the Rubedo I remember."

Don't lose control...don't lose control...

"Did he fight? Was it thrilling? Did he spit? Curse? Or did you wait until he was happy? Give him a last little glimpse of his favorite place perhaps? You were always the empathetic executioner, Nigredo."

"That wasn't Jr. It was a figment of Dmitri's mind to silence me, keep me still."

"But it was there, wasn't it? You can't deny that it felt good to accomplish your mission."

"No! That's not true!"

He was slipping, losing his concentration. A few more jeers from Citrine and he would be at Dmirti's mercy. The scientist waited patiently for his variant to work her magic on her counterpart. Gaignun slipped and viciously attacked her mind. She withdrew from him, but kept her composure. Gaignun was up in an instant, but collapsed again. The room pulsed drastically in front of him. He placed his hands against his head to stop the throbbing. His attack on Citrine ended and she straightened herself up, military again.

"That was a wonderful achievement, Nigredo." He heard her say as he slowly slipped away.

* * *

This time it was different. Gaignun realized it as soon as he went under. He didn't feel the doctor's presence as he had expected._ No, no Nigredo. _His raspy voice echoed._ You would resist even an image. I believe it's time to finally silence you._

The strange feeling engulfed him. His vision came back and for a moment he thought he was free again. Until everything turned into a mixture of red and purple.

"Hm?" Gaignun wondered vocally. He looked around. "Where am I?"

A sharp ping resounded. He closed his eyes against the sound. Such a familiar...

"What? G-get away. Stop! Stay back!"

Another one, a louder one. It shook him, jarring the very nerves in his mind. He could almost feel it physically pulling the muscle apart.

"Stop! Stop it! Stop it! Don't touch me!"

Noise. Suddenly so much noise. No, it was a voice. Thousands of voices, all calling him, urging him for something...something...

"Stop it! Stop talking to me!" He demanded again. "I refuse to acknowledge you! Stop talking to me!"

The murmurs grew louder and louder in mere seconds. They were so loud, so loud! Constant ululations, lamentations, speaking, urging, commanding...Stop!

"Stop it!" He cried out, his voice thick with desperation and dripping with a fear he'd never felt before.

"I won't do what you want! I-I..."

It was over. All his efforts, his resistance, it was all for nothing. He wasn't going to win against Dmirti. He wasn't going to escape, was never going to escape. All hope gone he allowed the murmurs to consume him, wrapping him together around this near crippling fear as he joined Albedo with the loss of his sanity.

"U...U-DO."

_Jr..._

* * *

Albedo's head jerked at the voice. Jr. looked curiously at him. "What is it now, Albedo?"

Albedo's eyes held a strange mixture that Jr. couldn't interpret which didn't surprise him. Albedo's emotions were as easy to read as they were to understand.

"Death has a message for you, dear Rubedo."

"Gaignun?" Jr. doubted. "That's just plain cruel, Albedo. I would've known if Gaignun sent me anything."

He crossed his arms and stared angrily at his brother. "What the hell could I possibly have left to give you? Hold against me if you want, whatever he allegedly sent to you. I'm not giving in."

Albedo sighed, frustrated. "Whispered like raindrops through waves of madness his words have fallen. For one accustomed to such murmurs, it is easily obtained."

Jr.'s face softened into worry. "Has he..."

"Mon précieux, he wishes only to say that he is sorry."

"What? What the hell does that mean?!"

"Dear Rubedo," Albedo whispered, his voice grave. The madman shifted his sight to the door of his domain.

"Death...will arrive for his Dragon."

* * *

A/N: I'm so sorry. I hope this chapter wasn't too terrible for such a looong wait. I promise to update soon. C:


	28. Occupation

A/N: YAY YAY! CX Finally another update. I'm so very sorry guys. I've been a lot busier than I expected I would be during the summer, but I've finally got this chapter worked out. Please please forgive. me. XD

This story has changed a lot and now I'm glad I warned everyone earlier about it's AU-ness and the time line b/c now we've suddenly jumped into the 3rd one. XD  
(Yes, that's right I'm totally magic) Please don't hesitate to chew me out for this chapter, as it might suck butt. If it does, I'll gladly replace it. ;P  
To my sweet sweet reviewers:  
I've seen a rift growing between the four of my frequent reviewers in response to who Jr. should be with forever. XD So much so that I've decided to put you on teams. XD

**_Team Albedo_**: This team is for my normal reviewers who prefer , but don't mind GaignunxJr. either. CX  
**The Original Oxymoron:**This team I have chosen for you b/c you have said many times that you are biast on the Albedo side and in your last review mentioned that a crazy Gaignun would be a win. XD Which I totally agree with.

**Albedo's Jerusalem:**As if your name doesn't just scream, AlbedoxJr. forever. XD I mean, your boyfriend has a freakin AlbedoxJr. icon. XD Plus you're always squealing over anything in this story that has them together. From rape to fluff, you're always rooting for the psycho. XD

**_Team Gaignun_:**This team consists of rabid Gaignun fangirls who would absolutley rip Albedo apart if he even thought about being with Jr. Rape or willing. XD  
**Tuahla: **I'll have to give you credit b/c although you are a major Gaignun lover, given time I do believe you'd love Albedo too. I think the waves infecting him have been rubbing off on you. XD Although I'm sure Jr.'s next rape would be the death of everyone's favorite lunatic.

**Ganon XD: ***sigh* XD You're absolutely hopeless when it comes to this. XD You won't even entertain the idea that they might belong together. B/c once you place a pairing on you list on your profile it is set in stone and anyone who dares to ruin the sanctity of them together shall die a horrible and painful death. And knowing you, you'd be the only person besides Jr. to be able to kill someone who is both immortal and invincible. XD

Anyways, let's get started shall we?  
I do not own Xenosaga, but I will rip apart its story and time line for my own purposes ;P

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 28  
Occupation

chaos smiled at Tony's slurred vocabulary as they made their way to the Elsa from the dock colony.

"And then--Then! Hah hah! Then, guess what happened!" Tony yelled, gesticulating crazily with one arm. The other was draped around chaos' shoulders loosely, held in place only by the boy's gloved hand around his wrist. The blonde laughed hysterically, his face flushed and his eyes red.

"He tried to hit me and so I hit hi-Him right, right here!" He said, giggling insanely and tapping a finger on chaos' nose. "Then all that red stuff came pourin' out 'n I was--I was--I was! chaos!"

Tony pointed toward an expensive looking blue ship. "I want to pilot that!" He gasped.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea, Tony."

"Why?!" He drunkenly shouted, "I'm the best pilot in the-in the--Ev-Ever! chaos! You know! You know tha-that!"

"I do. You're right, forgive me."

Tony nodded and slumped against the boy's side.

"And this is always the outcome of 'sight-seeing'?" Canaan asked.

chaos nodded, "Sometimes it worse. It's unusual for Tony to come back to the Elsa at all."

"Where is Hammer?"

"I don't know, but we haven't gotten much time left have we?"

Canaan shook his head. "I'll find him before we leave."

"chaos, I don't think it's in your job description to attend to the crew the way you do."

chaos shrugged, shifted Tony's weight for a better grip. "I don't exactly have a specific job description."

The three of them walked to the men's cabin. chaos gently laid Tony down onto one of the beds and then turned back to Canaan. "I don't mind though. They'd do the same for me."

"I can't really picture you drunk, chaos." Canaan said, humor in his voice.

"You'll never see me that way either. Everyone around me drinks enough for me."

chaos opened his connection gear and called Hammer.

"Captain Matthews?"

"He stays in the Elsa's bar."

"chaos!" Hammer's voice cried from the screen. "Did you find him!?"

"Yes, I brought him back here. Hammer, you're bleeding."

"Yeah, that bastard hit me!"

"Oh." chaos glanced stole a glance at Canaan before looking back at the screen. "He'd said something about hitting someone, I didn't know it was you."

Canaan snorted and started toward the hangar.

"Are you ok?"

Hammer sighed and straightened his glasses. "I'm fine, I'm fine."

"I'm sure it was a mistake..."chaos started, trying to stop the fight he knew was coming.

"Sure. He was very drunk and thought my face was a punching bag."

"I'm sure that--"

"Whatever, chaos. You tell him that I'll let it slide this time. I can tell that you're not in the mood for this right now. You ok?"

"Thank you and yes." chaos smiled, "I have something I need to do. Will you be alright?"

"If you mean will I get drunk off my ass, no. If I'll spare you a night without Tony and me fighting, sure."

The screen closed into a thin line and disappeared. chaos walked toward the hangar where he found Canaan standing against the wall of the Elsa's gun room.

"Ready?" he asked. chaos nodded and the two walked carefully toward the stairs. "Is the Professor still awake?" Canaan asked.

"I'm not sure if he ever sleeps." chaos chuckled. As if on cue a large explosions sounded from the lab. Smoke seeped through the tightly closed seems of the door. A loud "Assistant Scott!" followed the smoke.

"We will be in trouble if they find us." chaos whispered, hurriedly.

"What can they do about it? As far as they know we were commissioned for an expedition."

"Canaan," chaos smiled, "Have you spent any time alone with the Professor?"

Canaan reluctantly ran after chaos. "If you were so worried about this why not just transfer from the dock."

"It'd be too easily seen, Canaan." he answered, hurrying to open the doors.

Canaan sighed. He didn't see the point in being so secretive, but he was already here so it didn't really matter anymore. He pulled the E.S. container from his pocket.

"Transfer E.S."

* * *

All was quiet in the surrounding space. Starlight from infinite galaxies shone brightly, almost comfortably. Shelley Godwin was not relaxed by the calm this space provided. The Durandal had reached the exact point Master Gaignun had set for them but there was nothing. Only space. Empty space.

"Perhaps the enemy is using another cloaking device." Shelley whispered as she checked the monitors repeatedly for any change in values.

"I've been paging Master Gaignun for a while now..." Mary said worriedly, also feeling unsettled. "Maybe you should try Shelley," she frowned, "You reckon' he's still mad at me?"

Shelley gave her sister a small smile. "Of course not, Mary. Master Gaignun isn't the type to hold a grudge."

"Yeah..." Mary tried again, "I'm a' thinkin' that he's gonna show up here before we actually get out there. He'll wanna slap Albedo upside the head too, don't you think?"

"Yes. I'm sure he'd want to be a part of that."

"Head of the cavalry, just like always." Mary turned her attention to the 100-series. "Keep a sharp eye, everyone! We don't know what's around here. Be on the look out for any signs of enemy cloaking devices."

The elevator behind them shifted. Both Godwin sisters turned around in time to see Ziggy and MOMO.

"Have we found Jr. yet?" MOMO asked worriedly as she rushed over to Mary.

"Not yet, MOMO. We're still lookin'. Master Gaignun has to arrive before we make any other moves so we're just scanning the area."

MOMO nodded, "Ok. Is there anything I can do?"

"I think we can handle everything right now. Just relax, we'll find him soon."

MOMO nodded again and walked back to Ziggy. "Don't worry." He said softly, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Everything is going to be fine. Jr. can take care of himself."

"Yeah..." MOMO frowned. She wasn't so sure. Having experienced Albedo's madness first hand, her mind filled automatically with unpleasant images of torture and pain. She fiddled nervously with the bracelet Jr. had given her. The feel of the bullet in her hand and the small inscription made her feel safe. She wasn't the one who needed safety right now. Ziggy was concerned too. This felt different somehow and he knew from past experience how easily Jr. could be set off. Albedo would only act as a catalyst for every emotion Jr. had locked away or suppressed. He looked down at MOMO as she nervously walked to a nearby 100-series. Jr. was in danger.

"Gate out detected in the region in front of us." A Realian announced.

"What? Who is it?" Mary asked, turning toward her.

"Federation ships are advancing fast! First wave of attack, four minutes to impact!" Another Realian answered as she hurriedly pressed buttons on her console. Mary turned back in time to watch the ships appear from the dark realm of space, pushing aside the view of stars in place of blinding blue lights. Four ships as in perfect synchronization launched their attack as soon as they left hyperspace. The surprised Durandal had little time to prepare before the lasers hit.

"We've been hit!"

"Primary shield down, secondary shield deployed!"

"Begin preparations for full-scale attack!" Mary commanded. "All 100-series focus--"

The Durandal shook violently, sending everyone stumbling to keep balance. Ziggy hurried to MOMO to make sure the shock hadn't hurt her. The Durandal trembled again.

"Enemy forces have infiltrated the Durandal!"

"It's only a matter of time before they occupy all the blocks. Ziggy!" MOMO held tightly onto his arm. "We have to do something."

Ziggy nodded. "Stay here, MOMO."

"No. I want to help too!"

Before he could protest, MOMO was already on the elevator, beckoning him hurriedly. He followed her and the two took the elevator down.

* * *

"Canaan!"

"Yeah. An emergency signal from the Durandal."

"We've arrived too late." chaos said worriedly.

Canaan and chaos stared the the sight of Federation ships surrounding the Durandal.

"It appears that they've infiltrated already. We'll take the same entrance as the enemy and break through their ranks from behind. Take care of the weapons. I'll maneuver us through."

"Roger."

Canaan didn't want to admit how much he enjoyed the movement of the E.S. It seemed to mold with him, read his every thought as he skillfully twisted and slipped past unprepared A.M.W.S. and inattentive Salvator ships. He was made for this, wasn't he? Combat Realian specialized for E.S. piloting and whatever else Vector needed. He was sure he had functions even he was unaware of but he was sure that nothing felt as good as this machine. He would admit however, that chaos had become a far better navigator than he had fifteen years ago. His timing had always been perfect, but the determination and sharpness in his movements far exceeded the limitations of a normal human. Then again, Canaan thought, allowing a small smirk on his lips. Rubedo commanded a lot out of a person. They made it into the Durandal with ease, destroying threatening crafts and forcing their way into the dock after realizing that the sheer number of enemies in the destroyed part of the Durandal would prohibit their success.

"Do you think Jr. will forgive us for destroying the door?" chaos cringed as he destroyed the dock's outer wall.

"We didn't have any other choice. Let's worry about apologizing later and about rescue now."

The Durandal's dock was surprisingly empty. The two jumped out of the E.S. as soon as it was close enough for them to land.

"Enemies are detected to have infiltrated both the Mobile Hangar and Quarintine Hangar."

"Are they after the Zohar?"

Canaan quickly transferred the craft into its container. "That's an extreme possibility." The Realian answered. They ran toward the Durandal's loop line. "We should split up." chaos said urgently. "I'll head to the Quarintine Hangar. You find Mary and Shelley."

"Are you sure you should go by yourself, chaos? It's dangerous. Perhaps I should--"

"No. They'll head straight for the bridge. Right now, Mary and Shelley are in more danger than anyone else and if they get control of the Zohar..."

Canaan stared intently at the boy as he typed in their stops. "Careful." chaos said as the doors opened for the Realian to exit.

"You too."

* * *

Ziggy tore through the oncoming forces. It was amazing how well prepared these soldiers were. If they were indeed from the Salvator Faction, then Yuriev must have anticipated Ziggy's presence. All manners of high powered weaponry was strapped to their sides. Uniform they advanced, but Ziggy was ready. MOMO took shelter around corners in corridors the cyborg had already cleared. She was swift to pull the string on her composite bow whenever an enemy thought they had a clear shot at her bodyguard. They were a good team, the two of them. Every enemy Ziggy didn't have time to eliminate, MOMO took care of for him. The first Residential Area was almost completely clear of enemies when one of them snuck up behind the prototype and sunk a dagger into her left shoulder. She cried out, causing Ziggy to turn around.

"MOMO!"

He ran toward her, but she didn't need him. With one sharp turn she smashed the bow against her attacker's face with enough force to knock him down. Quickly she loosed an arrow into his chest. "MOMO, are you ok?"

The girl tried to stop her tears as she pulled the blade out of her shoulder. "I'm fine."

Jr. wouldn't cry over a knife, why should she? "I'm built a lot tougher than I look remember?"

She flashed a smile at him and shot an enemy attempting to sneak up on him. He nodded, "Right."

He turned back to the few remaining forces, wondering how far they'd gotten when he again heard MOMO scream. A tall woman with beautiful hazel eyes stared menacingly at him, an Eclair rod was pressed against MOMO's throat.

"A cybrog." she acknowledged. "And that is why no one has been able to occupy this block."

She pressed the rod harder against the girl's throat, causing her to whimper. "Ziggy..."

"Let her go."

"This is the prototype Dr. Yuriev values to no end so there is no cause for worry. I won't damage her too much."

She was choking MOMO now. Ziggy watched the pained expression on her face the harder it was pushed against her. Finally he dropped his arms. "Smart." Citrine instructed a fellow solider to bind the cyborg's arms. As soon as he was tied she pushed MOMO toward him.

"Take them to the Third Residential Area and lock them up. I'll ask father what to do with them later."

* * *

When Canaan entered the bridge, it was chaotic. The enemy hadn't infiltrated that far or far at all and from what he was hearing, Ziggy and MOMO were making quick work of the forces that had attempted occupation. Some of the 100-series were having trouble maintaining controls of the security so he busied himself with helping them keep people from coming in while Ziggy and the employees took out those trapped inside. Nothing was going right for them, however.

"Enemies have already penetrated blocks 32 and 34."

"Hurray and close the barrier walls! Close all the walls to each of the blocks!" Mary responded.

"I can't! The locks are all being overridden!"

Canaan ran to the Realian, trying to find the problem, it must be a glitch. Shelley worked frantically to find a similar problem, trying to take a secondary line and perhaps destroy the override code itself.

"The enemy forces have already reached the Residential Areas!" Another cried.

"What? What happened to Ziggy and MOMO?"

"Life forms matching them have been found in the Third Residential Area. It is likely that the two were captured."

"Our forces are weakening! The enemy is approaching!"

"Shelley," Mary said, slamming a hand on the control panel. "What is going on? Only command-ranking officers know how to open the gates during an emergencey! Have we been hacked?"

Shelley's eyes scanned the readings, "No. There's nothing wrong with the system."

"Then what's going on here?" Mary asked urgently, "The only ones who can release the locks are Little Master and Master Gaignun and us!"

Shelley turned to face her sister. "Yes. Pieta has acknowledged. The intruder is Master Gaignun!"

"No way!" Mary exclaimed, openly rejecting the idea. But the sound of the elevator's arrival called her attention. Both women turned sharply at the arrival of...

"Master Gaignun!" she gasped.

Shelley's gaze turned hard at her Master. Just what was happening? He walked briskly toward them, the two soldiers at his side remained where they were, awaiting orders.

"Why are you here?" Shelley asked, unsure of whether or not to be relaxed by his appearance.

Gaignun ignored her and continued on his straight path toward Mary. He walked as he always did, one arm behind his back, the other held loosely at his side. He outstretched his left hand to place it on the back of Mary's neck. He pulled her close until her face was pressed into the black of his suit in a hug.

"Well done," he whispered soothingly in her ear. "You've done a good job in my absence. Now get some well deserved rest."

He pulled his right hand from around his back and pressed the gun he held against the girl's side. Three quick shots fired into her. She gasped and started to fall. "Mary!" Shelley cried in devastated surprise. She ran to her sister and caught her before she could slam against the panel.

"Master Gaignun!" A 100-series screamed, "What are you doing?!"

He only responded in a rough laugh. A golden glow enveloped him and slowly died to reveal Dmitri's smirk and cold blue eyes.

* * *

A/N: Whooooooo! C: Aw, what no Jr. in this one? I warned you. C: Oh well, maybe we'll see him next chapter. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! Oh and btw, isn't it ironic how the sane people are on Albedo's team while the lunatics are on Gaignun's? XD Just curious.


	29. Alchemy of Spirit

A/N: Ok everyone! I'm back! Again with the sluggish updates!? I'm sorry, but this chapter took forever to write b/c this is what happened...

1.) My computer crashed while writing it and then...  
2.) I had to rewrite it again from memory when the charger to my laptop decided to go haywire so I  
3.) Resorted to writing it on paper that somehow was thrown away by an annoying sister so I  
4.) Had to borrow a niece's computer to get it done.

So XD My updates might be even slower now that my computer is dead. (totally cries)

ATTENTION TEAM ALBEDO

You have a new member! ;P Lucrecia LeVari has decided she's on the madman's team now too! I'm glad she decided b/c I really didn't know where to put her anyway. ^^;

Well anyway, you guys are lucky to have her b/c she's very smart.

Poor Team Gaignun. XD

You guys need more support b/c Team Albedo's going to kick your a**

Also, I would like to dedicate this chapter to Tuahla. XD B/c I bet her she couldn't write a threesome with these characters b/c it just...it's just...no. XD (Have any of you tried b/c it burned my soul.)

But she did. So I lose. XD Here's your chapter "Daddy" XD

I do not own Xenosaga, but if I did chaos would be a major character, someone would stab Kevin in the face, Wilhelm would be shown being evil more often and Jr.'s ultimate weapon would not cause an aneurism to obtain. XD

On with the fic!

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 29  
Alchemy of Spirit

"Albedo?" Jr. asked hesitantly.

He sat in the middle of the stairs in front of the throne of insanity. He twirled a gun in one hand; the whirl and click kept time with his thoughts. The madman watched him from his twisted seat. He found a strange comfort at the sight of him. So many things had changed but Jr. remained the same. That was one thing he could always count on.

"Rubedo."

"You said you heard Gaignun earlier."

Albedo sighed and propped a cheek on his fist, ignoring how much hearing that name angered him. He rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders in an exasperated fashion. Why bother with the all-consuming envy Nigredo's alias caused?

"Does the Dragon doubt my words?"

Jr. frowned angrily. "I don't have damn a reason to believe a fucking word you say. None of it makes any sense."

Albedo smiled cruelly at Jr. as amethyst eyes meet deep blue ones. "Then what is the reason for this inquiry, this question? Curiosity? Such a strange, strange boy, Rubedo."

Jr. shook off the sentence and was silent for a few moments. Whirl, whirl...click. Whirl, whirl...click.

"Can you...can you talk to him?"

The structure filled with Albedo's crazed laughter as he fought down emotions the request caused. He wasn't going to let Jr. know how much the question bothered him.

"Forgive me, I'm sorry. So many voices at once! Dear Rubedo, you must understand for this is a symptom of my instability." His smile was dark when he turned again to face his brother. "What was it that you said?"

"Answer me, Albedo!"

"What does it matter, Mon Précieux? He is infected like me. Like the very walls that breathe the life of the existence that you were created to destroy. When have you ever cared for such a being?"

Jr. jumped up suddenly, his blue eyes flashed violently as he took an offensive stance against his opposite. "I've always cared about Gaignun! I've never once stopped caring!"

The fire in his brother both excited and saddened the beast. Albedo's smile grew blacker at the rage that flooded down their link. "You misunderstand me, my beloved other half." Albedo rose from his throne in a dangerously graceful manner. "It is not Nigredo who you abandoned. It is not even the brothers you left to succumb to the song. Oh what a beautiful song! Encasing U-DO in it's every note, in it's every pause!" Albedo placed a boot on the top of the shallow steps, towering over the small Jr. who took a step back at the movement. "No, it is not the generic collective conscious of our father's seed that you betrayed."

With blinding speed he reached out for Jr. The variant jerked back, but Albedo caught him. He wrapped his fingers around Jr.'s left bicep and pulled him roughly toward him. The boy stumbled, landing awkwardly on his right knee while the left side of him was suspended by Albedo's grip. Considering the vulnerable position he was in Jr. didn't look very afraid. Even in his suspension he threatened his twin with the rage in his eyes and the silent energy that ghosted along the monster's mind. Albedo wouldn't have had it any other way. He jerked the boy sharply and leaned down over him only an inch, his evil smile still in its place. "What invisible strings tie you so closely to Demise? What power, what spell has he used to deceive your very will?"

"Why do you say such stupid things, Albedo? Gaignun would never hurt me. All he ever does is worry about me. All he ever does is protect me. Hell, he doesn't even take care of himself he's so focused on me." Jr. whispered the last part.

Albedo smiled as the strength of rage was replaced by sadness and guilt. "Magnetic are the waves of madness. Discord reigns within walls where order lies demolished; broken and bleeding. Nothing as sweet or addictive as the nectar in your veins, flower. In a land of lunacy, does your precious Executioner hide."

Albedo's left hand placed itself on Jr.'s forehead. The boy's eyes shot up at him violently, causing Albedo to chuckle almost fondly at the sight. In response to the touch Jr. swiftly raised a Makarov and pressed it under the demon's chin.

"You are my executioner, not Gaignun."

"Rubedo, my hopeless but most beloved other half." He adjusted the angle at which his head was bent until the barrel was touching his lips. He ran his tongue along the weapon lustfully, enjoying the cringe in his brother. "You're only tempting a willing sacrifice."

A force errupted from Albedo's palm and impacted against Jr.'s skin and the world went dark.

* * *

_Rubedo....Rubedo..._

Jr. shook his head. "Ow...dammit." he hissed, holding a palm flat against his forehead. He stumbled forward then noticed with surprise that he was actually standing after passing out. Familiar maniacal laughter rang in his ears. _Rubedo, are you always so distrusting of me?_

Jr.'s eyes snapped up at a motion to his right. A pale red wave collided with his skin before dissolving. Jr. frowned. This whole area was completely contaminated. The floor, the walls, everything was formed of pure U-DO, molded together in a mass to create a rounded mess of swirling consciousness. Wait. Jr. took a quick step forward, scanning the area. He knew this place.

_Gaignun? _

His steps grew quicker. _Gaignun?!_

Jr. was running now as he searched the tunnel-like vacuum that surrounded him. Albedo had surprisingly granted him his wish. This was Gaignun's mind. The fact that it was absolutely infested with U-DO didn't register to him as he searched his youngest brother's subconscious. It wasn't going to harm him. Unlike the others he wasn't going to get infected. Not that that would've stopped him in his wild search for his brother. Finally after an eternity of nothing but red and purple he found him.

"Gaignun!" Was what Jr. wanted to shout, but the image of his brother knocked the breath out of him. It was Gaignun alright; the Gaignun of fourteen years ago. The twelve year old boy smiled up at him from a book he was reading.

"Hello." he welcomed, tilting his head to one side. "How are you?"

Jr. remained speechless. He stared dumbly down at the boy who shook his head in response. "Forgive me," he said, his green eyes sparkling happily. "I don't meet many new people here at the institute. The scientists don't really allow us the privilege. I'm sorry if I came off rude or strange."

"Uh, no, no. It's nothing like that." Jr. sat down beside the boy. Just what was going on here? "Um...so..."

"Right! How impolite of me." The boy closed his book and set it at his side before extending an hand toward Jr. "U.R.T.V. variant, unit number 669, Nigredo."

Jr. was utterly shocked and upset by the reaction Gaignun was having toward him. His hesitance made the variant beside him shift uncomfortably. Afraid of what would happen to his mentality if he didn't respond positively Jr. met him in a friendly handshake. Doesn't he know who I am?

"What's your name?"

A sharp pain stabbed at his chest, but he ignored it and smiled. "I'm Jr., Gaignun Kukai Jr. I've got a real name, but let's just leave it at that for now."

"Strange. I thought you were a new unit. You look so much like the rest of us. Well, except of course, you're not wearing the uniform. This is sort of exciting, I'll admit. I don't think I've ever met an actual or um...please forgive my choice of words...a real boy."

Jr. smiled. Had Nigredo really been so innocent and polite once? Why hadn't he noticed? "Nah, there's nothing different about us, not really. I mean..."

Nigredo shrugged, "Maybe not, but sometimes this place feels sort of like a prison. I've heard my brother, Albedo refer to it as an institution instead of a place where science is explored."

"Albedo?"

Nigredo nodded enthusiastically. "Yes. He's a variant, too. I had another brother once, but...I don't know what happened to him."

Jr.'s worry spiked with every word Nigredo was saying. There was something seriously wrong here. Why didn't he remember who he was? Why did he remember Albedo and not him? None of this was making sense. He was in the middle of his freakout when Nigredo asked, "Do you have any brothers?"

"Me? Oh well, uh...yeah. I have two brothers. I'm the oldest."

"I bet that gets tough."

Jr. laughed darkly, "You have no idea."

The two were silent for a moment while Jr. panicked for what to do or say next. "Nigredo...?"

"Yes, Jr.?"

"I...um..." He sighed angrily and gave up trying to be careful. "Do you really not know who I am?"

Nigredo frowned, "Well, I know that your name is Jr. Is there something else I should..."

Jr. grabbed one of his hands and stared him straight into his eyes. "It's me, it's Rubedo, look!"

He pulled back the sleeve of his jacket and raised his palm to show him the red ink tattooed there. Nigredo's eyes widened. "It's me, it's Rubedo. You know, you remember. What's happened to you, Gaignun? Did Dad do this to you?"

Nigredo shook his head. "No. You can't be here, what are you doing? If he finds you he'll kill you!"

"Who Gaignun? What are you talking about?"

Nigredo looked around nervously. "You're the Red Dragon! Rubedo, why are you still here! Why didn't you leave when you had the chance! Where's Albedo?!"

"What? Albedo?" Jr. shook his head. He was so deeply confused. "What does he have to do with--"

"Get out of here, Rubedo! Why don't you ever listen to me?"

"Gaignun, what's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with you?! Get out of here, now!"

He was angry now. "No! Tell me what the hell's going on!" Jr. grabbed his wrist and yanked him up to stand beside him. "If I leave, you're coming with me!"

"Rubedo...go back to Albedo, there's nothing left here. If he finds out that you're here he'll kill you. Please, if you care about me at all, you'll leave now."

"Gaignun. Tell me what the hell is going on!"

Nigredo turned his eyes to the moving floor. "I can't protect you anymore. Albedo's the only protection you have now. Forget about me."

"How can you say something like that!? After all we've been through? There's no fucking way I'm leaving you behind!"

"Rubedo..."

"Gaignun, I love you! You love me, too! We're brothers, best friends! How could you even think that I'd abandon you, Gaignun?"

"You abandoned the wrong brother. Albedo's always been right. That's where you belong, now get out of here! Go, run!"

"Ok, look you're really starting to piss me off here. If you won't come willingly then I'll--"

Nigredo's body jerked sharply. "Gaignun?"

"Leave, Rubedo!" He jerked again. The surrounding space pulsed in time to his brother's jerks as they manifested into greater spasms. A loud ping sounded and Nigredo cried out, falling to his knees.

"Gaignun what's happening? Please tell me!" He dropped down and grabbed the boy's rocking shoulders, trying to get him to talk to him. "Gaignun, please!" Jr. cried again, looking around helplessly as the walls continued to pulse. Maybe he could counter it if he went Red Dragon? This was U-DO, right? He started to reach for the chemical, then stopped. Once the mode started it wouldn't stop until every wave was gone and that would destroy Gaignun's mind. He watched helpless at the growing spasms turned into sharp seizure like convulsions.

_Albedo! Albedo, please where are you? Help me! Albedo!_

But for once, Albedo didn't answer and finally Nigredo stopped.

"Gaignun!" Jr. sighed, cradling him. "Are you ok? Gaignun!"

"Jr." he choked out. "Run." He gasped sharply and in the span of a nanosecond he transformed from the twelve year old Nigredo to the twenty six year old Gaignun. At first the sight calmed Jr., making him think that the man had broken free of the monster that had seized him before. "Gaignun." he whispered and in the space of relief he even brought a hand up to run through the man's short black hair. "Gaignun are you ok? Is it over?" Jr.'s eyes swept over his brother's body, but nothing alarmed him or convinced him of anything other than that Gaignun was fine and he was back to normal. "Jeez, Gaignun you think you could---"

Gaignun's eyes snapped opened and with speed Jr. had only seen accomplished by Albedo wrapped his fingers around Jr.'s throat. Jr. was so shocked by the action that he could only grab helplessly at the man's arm. His strangulation didn't last long however, because Gaignun slung him across the swirling mass. The boy landed hard against the curving walls, snapping something that he was certain was his arm or his shoulder. He didn't have time to think about it though because just as he was pushing himself painfully up from the ground Gaignun was there to knock him back down with a fist against the side of his face. The first blow didn't knock him down, but a second did. He hit the floor again and pushed himself up, spitting up blood onto the floor.

"Gaignun!" he gasped, "What are you doing?"

To which Gaignun responded by kicking him in the side and sending him to the ground again. He rolled over onto his back. Telling by the pain that occured every time he took a breath some of his ribs were broken. Just fucking great. He dug his right hand into his back pocket and pulled out a Makarov, pointing it shakily at his brother. Gaignun laughed, a crazed laughter that shook Jr. in a way Albedo's could never come close to. He was laughing so hard he bent over, clutching his sides and then suddenly he was sobbing. The sight was terrifying to the broken boy.

"Fight me, Rubedo. Why aren't you fighting me? Shoot! Make this interesting!" He stood up, tear streaks from his sudden sobbing on his face. He crossed his arms and stared down at Jr., a mocking grin plastered on his skin and an evil glint in his eye. "You're making this too easy for me. I haven't spent all this time waiting to break free only to find out that the infamous Red Dragon is really such a weak little boy."

"What? Gaignun--what? I--! It's...what are you talking about?"

Gaignun went to kick him again so Jr. shot his right thigh. It was a small injury, the bullet went right through, but it was enough to send the man to his knees. Jr. scrambled desperatley to get up, kicking Gaignun's other leg out from under him. He watched Gaignun fall and the minute he landed Jr. was standing over him, gun to his head.

"Gaignun..." he choked out of pain and sorrow. "Why are you doing this? Don't you realize it's me? It's Jr. Your Jr." he shifted his useless left arm out of the way and tried to shallow his breathing that seemed to be ripping him apart with every push and pull of breath. An evil grin appeared on Gaignun's face. It was so frightening to see him like that. How was he supposed to fight Gaignun?

"Go ahead, do it, Rubedo."

Jr. gritted his teeth against the pain and emotion. The gun shook in his hand.

"Come on, Rubedo. You know you want to."

The gun shook harder. "I can't." he sobbed, tremors threatened to drop the gun he held. "I can't."

"Well, well. That was quite a show. But now I think it's time to end it."

Jr. recognized the voice as Albedo placed a hand on his wrist. Albedo looked with disgust at the man beneath him and dug a heel into his bleeding thigh. Gaignun hissed and squirmed.

"Albedo." He said angrily as if it were a profanity. Albedo ignored him and whispered lovingly to his older brother. "Dragon, I warned you. So stubborn."

"I can't do it, Albedo. I can't...I can't do it." He was still shaking, still holding the pistol at Gaignun's head.

"Yes, we are all aware." Albedo gently coaxed the boy's arm down. "Let us go, Rubedo."

"Albedo..."

"This is not something little boys should ever be a part of. Say goodbye to the Executioner."

Warm tears streamed down the boy's face as his brother cut the link.

* * *

Jr.'s eyes snapped open. He coughed violently, wincing from the pain in his ribs as he took in another breath that his lungs could reject.

"Mon Précieux..." Albedo whispered affectionatley.

He held the boy in his lap, rubbing the chest of his shirt to try to ease the boy's pain.

"Albedo." he choked, crying and coughing. He tried to stop himself from crying but it didn't work and his resistance only helped to aid his lungs in the rejection of oxygen.

_Dad made him do it. That's the only way Gaignun would ever do something like that._

Albedo didn't respond. He checked a cut over the boy's left eye as he sobbed into the white of Albedo's suit.

_What am I going to do? We're too late, Albedo. We're too late. _

_Quiet, Mon Précieux._

He placed a hand on Jr.'s left bicep and with a powerful jerk popped the bone back into its socket. Jr. screamed and cursed at the pain that shot through his upper body. Well that answered his what- was-broken question.

_Albedo...what are we going to do? What's wrong with Gaignun? Why was he...?_

Albedo frowned at the agony in his brother's mind. For once, it gave him absolutley no joy.

"Silence now, Dragon. They are only a gate jump away from us now. If you wish to save your executioner, you must rest. Don't object, for that is what got you into this mess to begin with. You may fight if you want, but a dragon with holes in his wings will only tumble toward death and as much as you'd like that..." Albedo raised the boy carefully and carried him down the dark hallways of the structure Jr. had so hard to memorize. He took him into an obscure room, taking so many twists and turns that in Jr.'s delirium would be impossible for him to find his way out. An old bed was pressed against the wall and even though Albedo thought it very unfit for his beloved Rubedo he placed the boy down. He pulled the boy's shirt up to his chest to wrap his ribs tightly.

"Goddamn that hurts." Jr. complained.

"It is what boys get when their playmates have scythes and an arsenal of lies strapped under dark robes."

Jr. didn't answer, just watched Albedo work. When the monster was done, he delicatley tugged the boy's shirt back down. "Now sleep, Dragon. Even if it is but a short one. War will call you soon."

He turned to leave. "Albedo. Thank you."

"Rubedo, you are my foe only because you wish for me to be. This flag of hatred, this mantle of pain is one you and Nigredo have fashioned for me. My eternal duty was only to wear them well."

Jr. watched sadly as his brother left. The way the light filtered through his cape gave Jr. the appearance of an angel.

* * *

Albedo waited in his throne for their arrival. He looked over at the bed he had shared with Rubedo and twisted its form until it meshed into the floor or the wall and back into U-DO. Albedo nodded in satisfaction at its complete disappearance. He wanted nothing to remind him of his brother.

**Don't tell him, Albedo. Please don't tell him. He'll hate me. Don't tell him.**

"Nigredo. In exchange for this promise I must have my own wish granted."

No, Albedo didn't plan to survive this battle, but that didn't bother him. Not even a little. Jr. would have to do something for him after all of this. It is true that without Dmirti, Gaignun's Red Dragon Killer might never have been activated, so as long as Albedo could get rid of Yuriev...

A loud crash shook his domain. He smiled. Speak of the Sinner. The doors to his throne room flew open and soliders came crashing in along with smaller A.M.W.S. that could fit into the space. They all stood formation, waiting for his movement or resistance to which he laughed.

"Humans! Such fools! Flock to your master, to whatever leader holds your fear! Weak, useless creatures! So fascinating! So meaningless in their existence! Come, all of you!"

Albedo stood from his throne and spread his arms as if in greeting. His day had finally come.

"Show me the futility of life!" His madness shook the beings in their places. "And I shall show you the purpose of mine."

* * *

A/N: Well, there we go. I'm sorry this was a late update. We'll get back to the Durandal gang next chapter. I hope this was ok, even though Jr. got ripped apart...but hey, what do you expect of someone like me? XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people!


	30. Infiltrate

A/N: Wow! I am late. I'm so sorry. ^^; I have secured a functioning computer and after a long battle with the internet the company finally realized that the modum or whatever needed to be fixed...long story short everything's cool. XD For now...

This chapter took a long time to write too and I'm sorry if it's kind of boring and yet again, Jr.-less but hey everyone's important remember? ;P

Oh right, I would like to thank and say hello to my most recent anon reviewer Friday. I absolutely love fanboys. XD You and Albedo's Jerusalem are a very rare breed and I'm honored to have two of you enjoy this story. Also, Friday I've noticed that that Team Gaignun has their eyes on you. ;P

They're in desperate need of a new member and speaking of which, they have a new slogan...or two since they couldn't agree on one.

Team Gaignun: It's fate!

XD

Or Team Gaignun: We only attack Albedo when he attacks Jr.

...

Riiight that might move you more towards the Albedo side. XD

Oh, right I would also like to take this time to announce that I am Team Jr.! B/c whoever he wants is fine with me as long as he's happy. Both men are the sex. ;P

Anyways, enough ramblings of an apologetic author. On with the ridiculous chapter!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and this knowledge does not help with my anger issues. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 30  
Infiltrate

It was surprising how large the transport on the Durandal's loopline with only one person on it. chaos shrugged. It gave him more room to think. He could feel the transport slowing down and knew it was reaching the Quarantine Hangar. Swiftly he placed himself flat against the space between the transport's sliding doors. He quieted his breathing and slowly concentrated all the energy he could build into his hands, storing them in the small jewels embedded into his gloves. He took a deep breath and held it tightly as the transport slowed to a complete stop and the doors slid open. For a few moments the only thing audible was silence and then the uncomfortable click of weaponry as the soldiers realized no one was emerging from the machine.

"The transport shouldn't operate on its own, should it?" he heard someone whisper.

"No, I don't think so. Let's go check it out."

chaos listened carefully to the number of steps and the way they echoed along the corridor as he tried to estimate how many people had been stationed here. He only heard two sets of footsteps though and he was proven right when only one officer appeared through each open door. It took them both a minute to realize the slim boy pressed flat against the wall, but when they did chaos jumped down, pressing his palms flat against the transport's floor. The energy left his skin and knocked the soldiers off their feet and onto their backs. The force knocked the man to chaos' right unconscious, but it took another wave of energy against the soldier's chest to efficiently knock him out. Worried that he might have caused attention from any other guards that had been hiding, chaos snapped his head up to look around quickly. He let out a relieved sigh. These were the only two. He found a long string of rope in one of their packs and tied them both tightly back to back before dragging them into a dark corner of the transport. chaos thoroughly hated having to fight and would only if he absolutely had to and he definitely avoided anything death-related, so this would have to do. He noticed a small communicator in one of the soldier's ear. He gently pulled it out and placed it into his own before leaving the transport.

Despite the fact that he had seen no one else standing guard chaos kept constant attention to his surroundings as he made his way to the giant doors. This whole area seemed foreboding. Everything was draped in the bright flashing red of warning, sending small corners and creases into dark halos were anyone or anything could hide. He reached the small keypad that would allow him entrance. He wasn't exactly looking for a way in, but trying to see if the lock had been opened by force or had been tampered with. He smiled to himself in relief. Dmitri must not know the access code. His smile fell when he thought about the danger that must put Mary and Shelley in. He looked from the door of the Quarantine Hangar to the key pad as he tried desperately to think of a way that he could make entrance any more difficult than it already was when he heard a buzzing in his ear. He turned his thoughts there, pressing a finger against the device in order to get a clearer reception.

"--ary to the Third Residential...rea...Realian will be...room...Cyborg is being held in eastern wing, room..briter code..."

chaos frowned at the information. Dmitri must have found the code. Suddenly he was torn between the two areas. Surely Dmitri would send someone to open the hangar doors. Should he stay and fight them off or rescue his friends first? If he waited, he stood a chance of being completely overpowered and if he was captured, Dmitri stood an even greater chance at victory than he already did. chaos wasn't about to give him that advantage. With one last long, hesitant, look at the Quarantine Hangar, he ran back to the loopline, all the while sending silent prayers that his choice wasn't a mistake.

* * *

Mary shook from the pain in her stomach. Shelley held onto her tighter, trying to hold the wound closed with her hand and all too aware of the blood escaping between her slender fingers. She glared up at Dmitri, silently threatening to kill him if anything happened to her sister. Dmitri answered the glint in her eyes with a mocking smile.

"Hello, or should I say pleased to meet you? Mary and Shelley Godwin."

Mary made a disgusted noise at his words.

"That body, is it Master Gaignun's?" Shelley asked. Her voice revealed some of the shock her eyes were attempting to hide behind inaudible threats. Dmitri raised his head high as if he were a nobleman talking to commoners. "This body is quite useful. Once I got used to it, it was extremely easy to use."

Canaan stood under the overhanging captain's desk, trying to scope the enemy. It seemed he only had two soldiers with him. That wasn't enough to protect him at all and definitely not enough to stop a specialized Realian. Still, he couldn't get a clear view of Dmitri, only the sound of his voice gave away his position. So instead he stood still, pressing a finger to his lips to silence the small 100-series. The Mizrahi models responded by keeping fearful eyes toward the deck. They weren't combat models and couldn't effectively fight the enemy so they obeyed Canaan and kept his presence a secret.

"As you can see, this ship is already under Salvator's control." Dmitri continued.

"What do you think you're doing?" Mary shouted, interrupting him. "This ship is under the jurisdiction of the Miltian government!"

The blonde felt her sister press harder to try to stop the bleeding and flinched slightly.

"Yes. This is a direct violation of the Federation Charter." Shelley agreed. "It will be dealt with appropriately by the Miltian government."

Dmitri was completley unphased by the threats. "Do as you please, however I doubt Helmer has that kind of power left."

Mary winced at the pain. The world was starting to spin. Dmitri laughed deeply at the girls.

"Now..." he started, "I'd like to put an end to this without making you suffer, but I'm afraid that's not an option. There are things I need you to tell me."

"What do you want?" Shelley asked, worried. Mary was losing too much blood.

"The Arbiter code."

Both girls gasped. "It's inside you isn't it? That Helmer, he truly is something. Hiding the release code in such cute young ladies."

"We don't know what you are talking about." Shelley said.

Dmitri raised a blonde eyebrow in disbelief. "Now, now, no need to lie. It is very unbecoming of such beautiful women." he mocked.

"We already told you we don't know anything and even if we did we aren't about to tell you!" Mary shouted. This was it. Now. Canaan ran a few steps back before taking a running start toward the captain's deck. He bent his knees and lept over the structure. He pulled a short purple laser knife from the pocket of his uniform and was about to land right on his target when a blow collided with his weapon, causing his arm to follow the down motion of the assailant who hit him again on the underside of his chin with such a force that it sent him in a spiral fall back the way he'd came. He landed hard, rolling onto his back. His enemy followed behind him, pressing a foot onto his chest.

The scientist laughed at the scene and leaned over the girls in order to get a better view of the fallen Realian.

"Please don't waste your time. Besides I think you've forgotten something. If you damage this body you'll lose your precious master."

Canaan opened his eyes to see a young woman in a Salvator uniform standing over him. Her back was straight, an Eclair rod hung loose and straight against her side as if she was confident in her ability to subdue him easily if need be. The smirk on her lips and in her hazel eyes confirmed her posture.

"You're a U.R.T.V." Canaan said heavily at the way her foot was constricting his breathing.

"It's nice to meet you. I am number six-six-eight but you can call me Citrine."

"Lovely isn't she? Her abilities are equal to and on par with those of Nigredo." Dmirti noted, overly pleased with the unit. He turned his attention back to the girls who had shifted closer to the captain's seat after Canaan's attempt on Dmitri's life. "I trust you know what that means. It would be a shame to have to see those beautiful faces twisted in pain now wouldn't it?"

The girls stared angrily at him. The Arbiter code was something that Helmer and Master Gaignun had entrusted to them. It was something they were supposed to protect but Shelley felt the pour of blood and the weakness in her sister even though Mary was trying to be strong. She wouldn't last much longer.

"So I hope you're willing to talk voluntarily."

* * *

chaos wasn't happy with the fact that the transport was so obvious when it slowed to a stop. There were more soldiers here than there had been at the Quarantine Hangar, so in order to avoid a fight, he had pulled on a Salvator soldier's uniform. He played the part of the soldier very well as he left the transport with a Hyams in his hands and a beret on his head. The large A.M.W.S. ignored him completely as he made his way into the Residential Area, saluting a "fellow" soldier on his way in.

chaos wasn't one for deception either but it couldn't be helped, not when he was alone. He made his way into the Residential Area. He hadn't remembered there being so many doors and corners for enemies to hide behind but everything seemed warped. He'd never imagined that the Durandal would be penetrated. He walked coolly, but upon trying to enter a room, realized that every door was tightly locked. Such a strange system. chaos shrugged. Oh well he couldn't really do anything about it. He knew where the release was. He moved freely through the slight security until he found the control panel for the emergency lock. The soldier there raised his head a chaos' arrival.

"Hello." chaos said pleasantly, waving slightly at him.

"Is there something you need?" He monotoned.

chaos kept the same demeanor. "Dr. Yuriev has orders to release the lock on this residential area."

The shoulder seemed surprised and shook his head. "But this is where we are keeping the prisoners."

chaos shrugged, "Certainly not all of them..." he trailed off, hoping the soldier would take the bait.

He did, "Yes. All of them. The only prisoners taken were those women,the girl, the cyborg and the Realian."

chaos had a little difficulty recovering from that had seen the corspes of employees on the way in, but he'd never imagined the actual possibility of them all being slain. There were two other residential areas, plenty of places to hide. Surely others must have survived somewhere...

The soldier saw the look on his face and smiled almost sympathetically.

"You must be knew, kid. Listen, you don't have proper clarification. How am I supposed to be sure that Yuriev actually sent you?"

chaos sighed and looked down at the floor, the Hyams weapon hung loosley in the crook of his right arm. "Forgive me. You've seen right through my guise."

The soldier was about to say something when chaos thrust out his left arm, placing two fingers against his neck. The man started to resist but a strange force impacted his skin, rendering him unconscious. chaos dropped the weapon to the floor and caught the solider as he fell forward, leaning him against the back of the chair he had been sitting in carefully. "Sorry." he whispered, turning his attention to the buttons, skimming the program until finally...there! A resounding echo filled the air as the locks on every room disarmed. chaos began his search of every room in the area, using a card key he'd found on the unconscious soldier. He had never been told where his friends were being held, so he had a hell of a time searching rooms, claiming to each soldier stationed inside that he had been sent to inspect the area and that he would be back in a few hours which wasn't necessarily a lie. They only nodded in response as he continued his search. Finally he stumbled upon the right door. It was at the far south western part of the Residential Area behind a door placed at the end of a downward slope positioned in the middle of this sectioned off area. Shelley's head snapped up at his arrival as did Canaan's as he stood protectively over her, ready for an attack.

"What's your buisness here?"

"I've come to inspect the rooms. I'm under orders to make sure that everything is in order."

chaos looked through dark sunglasses towards Canaan who took advantage of the distraction.

"I've got everything under control. No need for addition hel--"

Canaan wrapped an arm around the man's neck. The soldier dropped his weapon and chaos kicked it away, pointing his own towards the struggling body until it finally dropped limp. Canaan tossed it aside effortlessly and looked at chaos.

"Clever."

chaos smiled at his friend. "Are you ok?" he asked, directing his question to the elegant woman sitting on the bed.

"chaos." She rose up to join the men and bowed slightly. "I am overjoyed to see you unharmed. Thank you so much for your assistance."

He removed the glasses and berret, fixing her with his beautiful translucent eyes. She blushed slightly. "Where are the others?" he asked seriously.

"In another room." Canaan answered, coolly. He started towards the door.

"Mary has been injured, chaos. We need to get to her."

chaos nodded. "Let's find them."

Canann let the door slid open slightly, peering out the door for guards.

"There's only one guard in this area." he monotoned.

"There aren't many, but I didn't want to draw unnecessary attention while you were imprisoned."

Canaan nodded. "We'll rush the few soldiers on the way."

chaos and Shelley nodded. chaos handed his weapon to Shelley, who took its weight awkwardly.

"For protection." he explained.

chaos waited until the soldier had his back turned before he rushed out, slamming a powerful energy wave against his back. Canaan was behind him, running at full speed around a corner and carefully silencing a soldier. chaos waited until Shelley was ahead of him before smashing the man's face against the ground hard enough to cause him to pass out before getting up to follow. He followed the purple haired woman to around corners, making sure to catch a few soldiers that Canaan had missed. The Realian was the first to reach the door. He hadn't thought to bring a card key and didn't waste time rummaging through the last soldier belongs to find one. He punched the console hard enough to open the lock. The red light above the door flashed blue and slid open. The soldier inside had heard their arrival however and once the door slid open he placed his gun against MOMO's head, knocking her down to her knees.

"Come any closer and I'll shoot."

Canaan froze where he stood. chaos and Shelley had been close enough to hear the soldier's demand. chaos searched his mind for a way out of this. They didn't have much more time before someone caught them. Shelley was thinking along the same lines. She positioned the gun for a better grip and took off, chaos reached out to stop her but she was too fast. She shoved Canaan out of her way and pulled the trigger, piercing the soldier through the chest. He slammed against the wall and fell to the floor. chaos and Canaan simply stared at the woman who seemed just as surprised at herself. She looked toward chaos who smiled.

"Well, Jr. would be very impressed."

They entered the room, locking it behind them. MOMO was alright, a little shaken but alright. She had already taken care of Mary's wound. Ziggy had been strapped down rather impressively as the soldiers had feared his escape and the massacre to follow. Canaan unbound him swiftly and the cyborg immediately walked to MOMO who replied that she was fine. Shelley sat next to her sister worriedly.

"I'm fine Shelley, really. MOMO took real good care of me. I'm just a little tired's all."

Shelley nodded and ran a hand through her blonde locks.

"We have to move." Ziggy said. "What exactly is Dmitri planning?"

chaos frowned. "He took the Arbiter code. He's must be plotting something with the Zohar emulators, but what?"

Canaan looked toward Shelley. "Shelley, where are we headed."

"I am unsure. I am certain however, that it will lead us to the Little Master. I believe that Dmitri wishes to irraticate any obstacle and I'm sure the Little Master is perhaps the major one."

Ziggy nodded in agreement and MOMO clung close to him.

"We'll need to regain control of the ship," the cyborg said. "If we don't we'll be subject to whatever Dmitri orders."

"Yeah, let's drive that old man out of here an' git Master Gaignun back."

Shelley smiled down at her sister. "You won't be doing any of that."

"Neither of you will." Canaan said, "You stay here with Mary, Shelley. She can't be moved and this seems the best place for you."

Shelley nodded, "Understood."

chaos reached into the pocket of his uniform to hand her the rest of his ammunition.

"What about us? How should we split up?"

"I..." MOMO started, talking for the first time. "I want to help Jr."

Ziggy looked down at her. A softness appeared in his eyes as he stared at the small girl. "MOMO, it's very dangerous. Perhaps it would be better if you stayed behind to help protect Mary."

"No!" She yelled. She pulled a small contraption from her skirt and pressed a button. Slowly a bow formed in her hand. She stared up at him. "Jr. helped me. Now it's my turn."

Ziggy was about to protest when chaos placed a hand on his shoulder.

"MOMO and I can follow the troops when we land. You and Canaan secure the Quarantine Hangar and the bridge. I'll watch her. Everything will be fine."

"Agreeable." Canaan shrugged.

Ziggy hesitated for a moment. He really didn't like being separated from MOMO, especially during something this dangerous.

"I'll be fine, Ziggy. Please."

"Alright but that only means that we'll have to exterminate the enemy faster, Canaan."

Canaan nodded and jerked his head to move the orange hair away from his eyesight.

"Well, let's get started."

* * *

chaos was careful to keep MOMO close as she fell into the same routine she had had with her bodyguard, taking down guards chaos had missed. He was stealthier though, avoiding conflict as much as possible. She liked that. She didn't exactly enjoy combat as much as Jr. did. They had almost made their way out of the Residential Area when the ship shook violently. The sound of steal and metal scraping against each other grated in her mind as she stumbled into the boy.

"Are you ok?" he asked. She nodded and fixed her hat.

"I think we've landed."

"Yes." she said, looking around for holes. "The soldiers should lead us to the structure we just crashed into."

He nodded and held onto her hand as they carefully exited the Residential Area. All the soldiers had left, apparently knowing beforehand of the collision.

"MOMO, can you detect where the crew is leaving from?"

She nodded, "Yes. The mobile hangar. Enemy forces have left all Residential Areas and are making their way into the unknown structure."

He smiled gratefully at her. "Good. Let's go."

The two headed for the loopline that was already empty of soldiers. Yuriev's men moved fast, didn't they? It was a matter of seconds before they reached their destination. chaos pressed MOMO back against the wall as he had been when he first arrived at the Quarantine Hangar. He peeked around the corner of the left door to find soldiers running everywhere in the mayhem. chaos was thankful for his uniform as he tugged MOMO out of the transport. No one was paying attention to them in this confusion. They swiftly made their way into the ranks. They moved so fast that they'd almost broken to the front when they heard an eerily familiar sound that shook the men and grabbed their attention like nothing else.

"Humans!" Came the voice, "Such fools! Flock to your master, to whatever leader holds your fear! Weak, useless creatures! So fascinating! So meaningless in their existence! Come, all of you!"

MOMO held onto chaos' hand tightly as he pulled her through the crowd. She felt so happy she could cry. Was it strange that Albedo's voice was such a relieving sound that relaxed her mind and spirit? She gripped the bullet that hung from her bracelet. Jr. would be here. Jr. would be ok. Albedo wouldn't let anything bad happen to Jr. chaos had pulled them far enough away from the crowd of soldiers and up a small stair way that was broken off and had no end. The Realian listen with rapt attention at Albedo's sermon as he continued to preach to the quivering soldiers.

"Show me the futility of life!" He said, laughing in the soul trembling way his voice had. He bent foward, his eyes burning into the soliders minds. She could just feel it as he deep, terrifying voice rumbled, "And I shall show you the purpose of mine."

* * *

A/N: Wow. I didn't think I'd ever get this finished. I'm sorry it's so long and it's probably extremely boring, but if it sucked you know who to complain to. ;P Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people.

Oh, and Team Gaignun?

Stop threatening me! XD Do you want me to join Team Albedo? I thought not. Now be quiet. XD You got your GaignunxJr. oneshot that should hold you over for a little while.

And now I'm done. XD You may leave.


	31. Long Live Citrine

A/N: Where the hell have you been? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what everyone is asking me. Well if you're particularly angry (Albedo's Jerusalem) then you'll notice that I've been writing a lot of oneshots because of all these random urges, but now I'm back in Georgia after an awesome vacation in Florida and I am free of Gaignunists! XD What a horrible trip! In a car with two girls screaming "It's Fate!" in your ear how could you not write oneshots?

Well whatever. I've finally finished this chapter but guess what? My internet's down again. --;

Don't worry, my lovelies! I am going to drive to the library at !0:00pm and update this for you anyway!  
Am I that desperate? Perhaps. XD Perhaps not. I'll let you decide.  
Now I shall stfu and let you read.

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters or the poem, "The Emperor of Ice Cream" (insert random statement here) XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 31  
Long Live Citrine

Fighting Albedo was like trying to fight water. When shot, it sinks bullets. If cut it reforms again anew. Even if it is consumed in an explosion the particles meet again. Water is quite clearly indestructible and immovable in the way that it is inanimate and feels no pain. Unfortunately for Yuriev's soldiers, this body of water was very animate. And he loved pain.

His constant regeneration and his mocking laughter disturbed the soldiers to no end. Fear settled in and caused them to tighten their grips on weapons, pull harder on triggers, and cling to their rapidly disappearing bravery that had acted as their anchor in this frightening battle. Albedo's voice shook reason and shattered belief as it twisted them in the enticing waves of U-DO. Really, did any being survive such an encounter? Albedo's madness rang clear over the sound of bullets as he single-handedly ripped apart an A.M.W.S. that had dared to get that close. Less and less ammunition was fired as more and more weapons were dropped in panic. The leg of another giant machine vanished beneath Albedo's clawed hands. The pilot who had miraculously survived its destruction struggled to get away, but Albedo grabbed him by the neck and him up to eye level. He drank in the sight of the man's eyes and the desperate way he clung to Albedo's forearm. His laughter sent shivers down his spine.

"Call the roller of big cigars. The muscular one, and bid him whip."

His white gloves were decorated in crimson stripes as Albedo's grip tightened and claws dug into flesh. He whimpered helplessly. Small spasms manifested along his body as fear turned to consuming terror. Albedo smiled. "In kitchen cups, concupiscent curds, let the wenches dawdle in such dress as they are used to wear."

Albedo's comforting smile turned to a deadly grin. He looked side-long at the struggling man. It was a shame that he'd have to kill him. After all, he'd been so entertaining. With one powerful squeeze he ended the man's suffering. He chuckled; a noise that sent some of the soldiers stumbling backwards.

"And the boys?" he inquired, as if he were a friend asking an amusing or smart question to an earlier answer. He laughed again, "Let them bring flowers! Wrapped in the decayed and forgotten print of last month's newspaper!"

Then suddenly all was silent. Even in Madness' realm insanity ceased for a moment. Nothing but stillness and then suddenly...

Albedo's grin grew darker. The blackest of smiles seen only gracing the cold countenance of Death's angel himself. Noise so quiet the people around him began to search for its source for fear of what this white demon might do next. Then they could feel it. The very air was vibrating, crumbling the dimension of sound. They were searching frantically now. Oh how pleasant the sight. Albedo's grin turned into a smirk at the reaction. He saw movement out of the corner of his eye. chaos? Yes. Shielding MOMO from what he knew was about to occur. Silver tendrils of snapping electricity covered his skin.

"Let be, be finale of seem." The violent tremble of the air was now visible. Some soldiers braced themselves for the inevitable. Some soldiers prayed to their god that death would come swiftly. Some soldiers actually dropped rank and fled, thinking they could escape. None of it mattered; all of it meaningless. Albedo prepared to slaughter the vast amount of sheep lead by the conniving shepherd.

"_The only emperor is the emperor of ice cream_."

* * *

Jr. awoke with the worst headache of his entire life. Everything hurt. He felt as if he'd been hit by a car that had immediately backed over him again once it had realized who it had ran over the first time. He inhaled sharply, hissing at the pain in his ribs. Was it just him or did he seem to be getting his ass kicked a lot lately?

"Damn, Gaignun."

A fire was burning down his left arm. He moved it around experimentally and cringed. Every time the motion called for movement out of the socket a sharp pain shot along his arm. It hurt, but it was tolerable and he could move it. He sighed carefully.

"I'm not very happy with you right now, you know?"

He lightly touched the bandage on his ribs and decided it was time to try and stand up. With a suppressed need to sigh again he eased himself off the bed and onto the floor. His legs could hold his weight, so that was a good sign. He gritted his teeth against the pain walking actually caused. Guess it couldn't be helped though. Even so...

He placed himself back down on the bed. He really didn't want to see Albedo right now. Albedo was so emotionally draining and Jr. didn't have any strength to spare.

"You owe me one, Gaignun," he whispered as he closed his eyes. Surprisingly though, he couldn't sleep. Not because of the pain, but because he just couldn't get the image of Gaignun out of his mind. The disturbing look in his eyes. The set of his jaw as he smirked up at Jr., daring him to kill him. The sudden rush from tears to laughter. The thought made him shiver a little. He was almost tempted to open the link, desperate to get any kind of contact with his youngest brother.

_Uh uh uh, my dear sweet Rubedo. No need to rend flesh yet unhealed by Time's compassion._

_I can't wait for that. Gaignun needs me._ Jr. said angrily. He pressed once again on their link.

_Lying on your back and exposing your unarmored belly for him to slay at his leisure will not benefit him or you, Dragon._

Jr. pressed back against Albedo's block. _Stay out of this._

Jr. could feel the frown. _And yet you call for me. Can't have it both ways, my rose._

Jr. growled angrily and pushed himself up. _I'm going to talk to Gaignun again. That wasn't him. He won't do it again. He won't._

_Wrapped in the tendrils of madness mind is useless. The slayer of sanity reigns within him. _

_And in you too! _Jr. spat, balling his hands into fists at Albedo's words_. What makes you think you've more control over anything than Gaignun does? You're worse than he is!_

_Ah Rubedo, while all other fires have dulled to embers you blaze still with incredible intensity. _Albedo chuckled down their link. _One who fights against its madness and one who embraces it. Join it and gain immense power. Reject it..._

He felt Albedo's grin.

_Bastard!_

Madness.

A loud crash interrupted their conversation, the force throwing the boy forward a little and awakening the pain in his ribs. "Shit!" he exclaimed, placing a hand over the sharp pain, trying to breathe in a way that wouldn't bother them much.

"Albedo what's happening?"

Jr.'s body tensed at the lack of answer. _Albedo?_

Another force rocked the structure. _Albedo? Albedo!_

"Damn it!"

Jr. pushed himself off of his bed, grabbing his guns. He tried to make it to the door but ended up slumped against the wall. Damn his ribs hurt_. Albedo? Albedo! Answer me!_

Jr. was starting to get worried now. Another shake caused him to stumble forward.

_Albedo!_

_Rubedo?_

He sighed with relief despite the pain in his ribs.

_Hm? Oh you were worried for my sake? How awfully sweet Rubedo._

Jr. gritted his teeth but his angry thoughts were replaced by confusion when he heard Albedo's thoughts. _Escape? Hah! How simply amazing. Did you think you could escape me my dearest little sheep? Where is your shepherd? My how lost you've become._

_What?_ Jr. sent, sliding back down onto the floor. _Albedo, what are you doing? Who are you talking to?_

Jr. cringed as he felt the energy in Albedo's mind change from comforting to deadly. _Father's flock. _He answered._ It appears this one has found the wolf. Did you ignore the caution of the mother for the sins of the father my dear Riding Hood?_

_Dad's here?_ Jr. struggled to push himself up.

A sickening feeling washed over him. It tightened his stomach and made him dizzy. Albedo laughed. _Don't find enjoyment in his struggle? Is it not beautiful? This fear is something only humans can produce. Fear like this. It's gorgeous isn't it? _

Jr. shivered. _Albedo stop it. I don't enjoy the sick things you do. _

Albedo chuckled. Jr. finally made it up and to the sliding door. If Dmirti was there, that meant that Gaignun was there. He couldn't waste time sleeping or healing or giving up energy to Albedo. It was time to get Gaignun back.

_Rubedo._

_What now?_

A grin._Temper, temper, my fiery passion. _

_Get to the point, asshole._

A darker grin.

_What Albedo? Are you going to try and stop me? More of that Dragon and Death bullshit?_

_Allow me to clear the way for you, _mon précieux_**. **_

_What?_

The link was silent. Eerily silent, as if the very waves in Albedo's body had paused for a brief moment. The silence bothered Jr. but not as much as what followed behind it. Powerful vibrations shook the air in front of him, distorting it into almost circular shapes.

_Whoa, Albedo...!_ Jr. braced himself for the dangerous wave of energy that was about to impact.

The trembling grew worse, shattering the dimension of sound.

_Rubedo, what is the purpose behind all of this? Even if I take up the Reaper's scythe and slay these sheep in the name of my Dragon it is all meaningless. _

Guilt wormed its way into Jr.'s chest, surprising him.

"Let be, be finale of seem."

Jr. heard Albedo rumble towards the soldiers. He felt Albedo's strength through his veins as if he were the one building energy. Then in the disturbing way that shook Jr.'s mind Albedo both spoke and sent,

"_The only emperor is the emperor of ice cream."_

* * *

_Does this please you, Rubedo?_ Albedo asked.

A sharp energy erupted from him. Soldiers screamed as the wave impacted. Outward the dark purple energy emitted, devouring the men with its strength and slicing their minds with its sound. chaos covered MOMO by pressing her underneath him and taking the full impact himself. Albedo's lips curled into a snicker at the sight. Whatever the boy was using as a shield was working quiet well. When the wave ended cries of agony reigned where madness had once. Albedo couldn't help it. It was all amazing. His laughter was loud and clear through the walls, mixing with the agony and calling forth U-DO. The madman walked slowly towards the remaining soldiers writhing on the ground beneath him. Like a child set loose in a candy shop he merrily strolled towards the objects he wanted. Quite unlike a child set loose in a candy shop, he repeatedly decapitated and/or slaughtered any soldier left alive, laughing hysterically as he went.

"How about now, Rubedo?" Albedo screamed into the now empty sound. "Do I please you now?"

He raised blood-stained claws to the ceiling as if Jr. were watching him from Heaven instead of being tucked saftely away in a room. "I have become Death himself and I still can not please you!"

He lowered his hands to stare intently at his crimson palms. "Perhaps it is because he is your own personal Executioner. His one purpose, my rose...I can not become such a demon. Do you believe that, Rubedo?"

chaos pushed himself off of MOMO. "Are you alright MOMO?"

MOMO nodded, wondering why he was worried about her when he was the one who had received the damage. "chaos?"

He smiled kindly at her and pushed himself off. "I'm fine." he said, wincing a little. Scrapes were visible on his face and neck. The tight suit that covered his body was slashed in many places and from each slash came a little bit of blood, but nothing too serious. chaos turned his attention to the mutterings of the lunatic. From this distance he seemed like a lost boy. When he turned his eyes up to meet chaos' translucent ones he seemed as if he were about to cry. That changed quickly, however. Electricity flickered behind dark purple eyes. His dark grin returned and he leisurely began his way towards the two.

"Ah, ma pêche." He boomed, "How long has it been since I grazed such soft skin in conquest?"

MOMO shivered at the sound of his voice. "Al-Albedo..."

"And how long has it been," he continued, placing a foot on the bottom stair of their broken staircase. "Since I caught that same flicker of Rubedo in your heart? My red haired Rubedo?"

MOMO didn't respond. She and chaos sat in their spots, watching the white demon carefully. He laughed at her quaking and at the way she seemed to try and disappear behind the dark-skinned boy. He had seen this boy before somewhere in the depths of the Song of Nephilim. Yes, he tried to calm Rubedo. No one can calm Rubedo. chaos is the name he pulled from Jr.'s mind. To him it seemed unfitting, but this boy wasn't important enough to do worry about. He grinned down at MOMO.

"Is he the reason for your prescence? Such a pure heart come to collect her prince? How is it, peche? Have you enjoyed playing warrior?"

Albedo was towering over them, staring down the small prototype with his menacing eyes.

"My blossoming peach has been tainted with blood. Ah yes! How amusing! What a day this has been! What wonders this universe, this dimension holds! Pêche! My diamond crafted from the broken bottles of cherries!" Albedo bent down and grabbed her arm, jerking her to hm. "Perhaps it is time we reacquaint."

A gloved hand grabbed wrapped around his wrist and a smooth voice. "Where is he, Albedo?"

Oh? So this boy knew his name. Albedo grinned dangerously at the him.

"Who are you to inquire?"

"We're here to help him, Albedo, not to fight you."

Albedo found the boy's unwavering and unfrightened gaze very amusing. Swiftly, moving his hand from MOMO's arm, he placed it around chaos' neck, raising him up to eye level. He was holding him loosely, however. No pressure was applied. MOMO panicked a little and went to pull on her bow, but chaos stopped her, raising a hand to warn her to stay down. This amused Albedo even more.

"Peace! Tranquility! Angel in our midst, perhaps? Are you my Rubedo's Adam? Taken my place? Poisoned Passion against Innocence?"

His grip on chaos' neck tightened as his anger rose. He dug through Jr.'s memories, looking for something about this boy until... "You!" He exclaimed,"It was you who led my Rubedo to Death! Tell me why I should spare you."

chaos remained calm despite the tightening grip on his neck. Albedo wasn't sure what to do with this one.

"You've never needed help poisoning Jr. against you."

Dangerous anger bloomed in Albedo's eyes but contrasted with the graceful smile on his lips.

"Such words!" He laughed. "Defective Cupid! Tell me why it was Nigredo's mind at ease. When mine was such a better challenge!"

"It wasn't his mind that required easing."

"Then perhaps my heart?"

"Albedo, we're wasting time. Please let us go."

Albedo's frown finally reflected his emotions. He didn't like the way chaos seemed unafraid of him. He didn't like the way his translucent green eyes showed nothing but serenity and no matter how hard his grip became the boy didn't struggle.

"He's starting to believe it, Albedo." chaos wheezed, wincing a little at the painful hold on his neck. Surprise flickered across his features. "But if you let Gaignun die he'll never forgive you."

"And my past trespasses?"

"Albedo. Where is he?"

Another staring match ensued between the two before Albedo finally spoke.

"Ma Pêche. In the darkest areas of the labyrinth that is Mizrahi's mind lies Rubedo. Cupid, where is the sinner?"

"I don't know."

"Pêche?"

"He's...um..." MOMO whispered, caught of guard by the question. "Sensors show a life form resembling that of Gaignun's near the Quarantine Hangar."

Albedo smirked. "Ah, the relics." He dropped chaos and started to leave.

"Cupid. Do not tell Rubedo where I've gone."

MOMO rushed to chaos' side as Albedo made his way down the stairs. The boy struggled to hold in the oxygen his lungs kept forcing him to cough up. Blood specked the black floor.

"chaos! Let me fix your wounds or...um..." MOMO tried to find something in her system to stop internal bleeding, but he smiled at her and said,"That was pretty rough, but I think I'm alright."

"Le-let me fix some of these cuts at least..."

"Alright." he agreed. "We have to hurry though, MOMO."

She nodded and hastily began to treat the worst of his bleeding. chaos absently rubbed the purpling bruise on his skin, wincing at the pain only a small amount of contact caused.

"That looks really bad, chaos." MOMO said worriedly. "Are you sure you don't want me to look at it."

"I don't really think there's much anyone can do for it..." chaos said, watching the tail end of Albedo's cape vanish into the hole the Durandal had created.

"And lo; a white horse and he that sat on him had a bow: and there was given unto him a crown, and he departed as conqueror and to conquest. For Heaven he brings Salvation. Hell, ruination."

"chaos?" MOMO asked, confused.

He shook his head and gave her a reassuring smile. "It's nothing MOMO. I'm just talking to myself."

She nodded and turned back to close a bleeding wound.

"Which side have you chosen? Who will you fight for, Rider of the White Horse?"

* * *

Albedo raised an eyebrow at the form before him.

"It's been a while."

Wrong, ma pêche. So very, very wrong and yet...appropriate.

"I wasn't expecting you to come, unit six-six-seven. Where is the Red Dragon?"

"Wouldn't you like to know."

"I would."

Albedo smiled. "Such information is privileged. Although I assumed the Queen of the Damned would have found him by now."

Hazel eyes threatened amythest. "Hm. Pretending to be valiant, Failure?"

Albedo shrugged as if the question fatigued him, "If pretending to be valiant comes in the same wrapping as attempting to become death then I assume it is. Perhaps you should open the box before you judge the presentation, Your Majesty."

A smile formed on delicate lips. "Words with art. A lunatic wishing for sanity?"

"Yes! That is what I have become! Just as you are a marionette, blindly following a foolish master with an idiotic purpose."

"Speaks the failure who lives in misery without one."

Albedo absorbed the sentence hungrily. "Without one? My dear! My blind woman! Can you not realize?! The reason for my existence is unattainable! My purpose ever-changing!"

He continued his interrupted passage, stepping closer to her. "The sins of the father culminate behind you. Pulsating in their anticipation of the end of my dragon. Like the beating heart of the guilty mind they scream for an end! I am here to deliver it. Unfortunately..."

Albedo's featured in a twisted darkly. A snap of bloody claws announced the arrival again of the purple snapping electricty. U-DO's waves appeared to surround him in spiral motions, licking the air as if to taunt the woman.

"You are in my way. And now, my newest purpose is to end your's."

She wasn't afraid, wasn't even hesitant in her stance. She released her gun from the holster under her left arm. "For Rubedo?"

"For Nigredo."

That seemed to catch her off guard. "Failure, you are aware of my power. Not even the Red Dragon will be able to stand against it." She walked closer to him and balanced her weight forward, an Elcair rod tapping gently on her left thigh. "You are his other half. Twins or not his is the only perfect wavelength. The Killer should be more than enough for you."

Albedo smirked. "A flower and his thorns are one and the same. The power you hold will destroy us both. This is a knowledge given to me by your brother."

"Your's as well."

"More of one to you."

"And you fight me anyway. Why is that?"

Albedo shrugged in mock confusion. "It could be that the seduction of the afterlife is twisting these waves of lunacy into lust. It could be the urge to map my way through this infinite existence with blood lust and crackpot theories. Possibly it is a promise I made in order to gain something above your understanding unless...How is Nigredo, Your Majesty?"

A bullet blasted through his left shoulder. Albedo laughed at the searing pain. "Mmm! Yes! I had no idea one such as yourself gave way to anger! Wonderful! Absolutely wonderful!"

She smirked at him. "I am no slave to it. I assumed such a motion would make you silent. Father insists that I don't waste time on meaningless things. So let us get this over with, shall we?"

Albedo eyes narrowed wickedly. He chuckled, the sound resounding off the closed walls.

"Shall we make a toast then? To my demise!"

Sharp orange electricity mirrored Albedo's in response. "And to my victory."

"Yes of course! How very rude of me!"

He bowed slightly, slowly raising his amyest eyes to her hazel ones. "Long live Citrine."

* * *

It didn't take them long to find Jr. He was wandering around in the darkness, silently cursing to himself for not paying attention when Albedo had carried him here. MOMO ran to him the minute she saw him, screaming his name and crashing into him.

"Jr.! You're ok! You're ok!"

Jr. ignored his screaming ribs and shoulder to smile at her. "MOMO!" he answered, delighted. "Yeah, I'm ok."

"I was so so worried!" she whispered, holding him tighter.

He looked behind MOMO to see chaos' soft smile. How long had it been since he'd seen them?

"Jr. I was beginning to think we'd never find you." chaos motioned to the walls around him. "This really is like a maze. If it weren't for MOMO, we'd never have found you."

"And I would've never found my way out." Jr. said, pushing himself away from MOMO. He grasped his ribs and rubbed his shoulder, leaning over from the sharp pain. "Jr.! Are you alright?" chaos asked, rushing over to him.

"Yeah, yeah." Jr. said, waving them off and leaning on the nearest wall.

"Did...did Albedo hurt you?" MOMO asked, quietly afraid that her eariler thoughts about Albedo keeping Jr. alive had almost been wrong.

"No." He answered, laughing darkly, "Actually he helped me this time."

Jr. shook his head of bad memories. "I was just careless. You know me." He flashed them both a smile and they relaxed. "Speaking of my brother. How did you guys get past him? Did he hurt you MOMO? chaos?" Jr. said, pointing to the bruise around his neck. "What happened there?"

chaos absently touched the discoloration. "We met Albedo. He told us where you were, or sort of."

"What happened anyway?" He asked. Jr. stood up straight, the pain of his ribs finally dulling enough for him to forget about it.

"The Durandal smashed into this structure." MOMO answered. She watched Jr. cautiously in case he started to fall over again. "And Yuriev's soldiers tried to infiltrate. chaos and I snuck in with the mob in order to find you. We thought if they were distracted by Albedo we could get past him but it didn't work out that way. Instead Albedo destroyed everyone and then he left to go somewhere."

"Where?"

"He told me not to say," chaos answered.

"Well tell me anyway! I've been trying to talk to him for over an hour but he's blocked off his mind. Was he alright?"

"Are you worried about him?"

"I--yeah a little."

chaos nodded. "He's fine. He just single-handedly slaughtered an entire army, but he's fine."

Jr. sighed and rubbed away an oncoming headache. "Why did he tell you not to say?"

"I think he doesn't want you to stop him." MOMO replied, "But I also think he needs help. chaos?"

chaos shrugged. "I was told not to tell, you weren't, MOMO."

"Will you tell me? Please?" Jr. asked politely.

MOMO hesitated for a moment, "I think he's going after Dmitri."

"By himself?!" Jr. exclaimed. "Motherfu---Idiot! That idiot!"

He shook his head and tried his best to form another link, but Albedo's mind was blocked. The silence in his mind was disturbing. It had never been this quiet before. He shook off the feeling.

"MOMO, can you lead us out of here?"

She nodded, brushing pink curls away from her eyes. "It might take a while, but I can find our way back."

"Good. Let's get started."

They both nodded. MOMO lead the way, cutting corners as fast as she could and mapping her way through the darkness. Jr. was thankful for MOMO because he was too worried to think about getting out of this maze. What the hell was Albedo thinking going off by himself? If something bad happened to him...

And what about Gaignun? If Albedo disappeared he'd never be able to get Gaignun back. The silence was so loud that Jr. thought he might go insane. He'd never thought that their lack of prying would make him so upset. For the first time in his life he felt alone, truly alone.

"Holy shit." Jr. said upon sight of the gorey remains of Albedo's battle. chaos frowned. "Yes. It was a massacre."

MOMO moved closer to Jr., a little shaken by the sight she'd purposely looked away from until now.

"Well, he gets the job done." Jr. said grimly. "MOMO, can you tell me where he is?"

"The Quarantine Hangar."

"The Quarantine Hangar? That's where the zohars are! chaos!"

"I know. Most of the soldiers onboard the ship have been taken out though. We should have no problem getting from here to there. Let's hurry."

"Yeah." Jr. nodded. He started to make his way through the tangle of bodies when he felt a strange pang in his chest. It wasn't bad at first and he actually thought he'd just imagined it. When it happened again, he rubbed at it absently. He reasoned that it must've been caused from the pain in his ribs. The third time it was worse. The pain was so sharp it sent him to the bloody floor.

"Jr.?" MOMO asked, stopping. chaos stopped too, concerned.

He cried out against the next one. He grasped at the pain with his left hand, holding himself up from the floor with the other. "Jr., what's wrong?" chaos asked, worriedly.

"My chest. My right side." he gasped, confusion evident in his surprised gaze.

"This pain...It--it's Albedo's!"

_Albedo!_

_Rubedo..._

_Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you wait for me?! Why didn't you just wait?!_

_Let the lamp affix it's beam..._

_Albedo, no. Don't--don't do that. Not right now. Just wait. Just wait for me, ok? I'll be there. I'll be right there._

Another violent pang assailed him, but he pushed himself up anyway. He started to run but another pang brought him back to his knees.

_Rubedo..._Albedo sent. His mind felt heavy as if he were drugged. Panic filled Jr. at the realization.

_I tried for you. Death is a role I was not meant to play. Will you...forgive me?_

_Shut up, Albedo._ Jr. gasped as another rush of pain hit him. _Don't be stupid. _

A strange feeling of happiness filled Jr.'s frightened mind.

_Yes. Burn bright enough to melt suns, Rubedo_. Tired laughter rang in his ears. _Just...like you always have._

_Albedo don't be stupid. I'll be right there and you'll be ok. You can't die! You're indestructible! The only person who can kill you is me, Albedo! Isn't that what you've always wanted? You can't die unless I give you permission! Albedo! Are you listening?! Albedo!_

_Rubedo, my passionate red rose, mon precieux. I love you._

_Albedo! Goddammit! Albedo...!_

"His heartbeat is fading..." Jr. wheezed, his voice breaking. MOMO wrapped her arms around Jr. and chaos bent down to place a hand on his back. _Please don't go..._

Tears rolled down the boy's cheeks as he felt the pangs growing weaker and weaker.

"It can't be...Albedo..."

* * *

A/N: Oh nos! D: What's happened to Albedo? Psh. As if it wasn't obvious enough what happened. XD I'll let you figure out if he's actually dead or not. I just know I'll get in trouble for this one. --;

Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! C:


	32. Albedo

A/N: Heellloooo guys. Cx Well look who decided to pull herself away from a Death Note marathon to update? Hm? Me? No, not me. XD I'm watching it right now. Sorry that none of you are quite that special. ;P

Now you all know how bad I am about starting one thing and then writing another that was totally different from what it was supposed to be...

Well guess what? XD This is one of those times. Sorry. ^^;

This chapter and the next one--What? Two updates in one day at the same time?--Hush! XD I didn't finish. This chapter and the next one are both about Albedo and his past with his brothers. Please note that I have taken a loooot of liberties one these two as I've never exactly played the D.S. version and don't really know much more than the 2nd game offers. I've never quite understood the purpose of placing a game that's entirely on one console on a random handheld of a rival company but whatever. --;

I shall be quiet and let you read. C:

I do not own Xenosaga but if I had written it I would've tried to not make is so confusing. .

CX

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 32  
Albedo

Albedo stood with his hands behind his back, trying to act innocent. He could feel Rubedo's glare burning into the back of his skull and Nigredo's sense of worry so he knew he was in trouble. He tried to think quickly of what he could have possibly done to make Rubedo that angry. He hadn't been mean to a scientist. He hadn't made Sakura cry today. They hadn't even seen that girl at all, so he couldn't have made her cry. He had remembered not to leave the door open so Gaignun could run out. He hadn't broken anything...

"What?" he asked over his left shoulder, annoyed that they just kept staring at him. Rubedo's stance turned angry instantly at Albedo's response.

"What were you thinking? Number 623's badly injured!"

"Huh?" Albedo wondered aloud. Then it hit him. This was about the unit he had punished for making fun of Rubedo. He sighed, thankful that it was something so minor. He relaxed, turning around to face them and placing his hands behind his head. "Oh! Is that what this is about? All he's gotta do is just regenerate. What's the problem?"

He watched Rubedo's face soften into confusion. "Regenerate?

Albedo lowered his arms from his head. Small spurts of electricity flickered off his fingers as blue mass of wavelength formed in his palm. He looked as if to make sure of it's strength and then to his brothers. "Regenerate." He said, nonchalant. He raised the ball to his head. "Like this."

He released it, the mass making clear contact with his skull. The force destroyed his head and splattered blood onto the stone monument beside him. Rubedo pulled back in shock while Nigredo covered his mouth with both hands. Terrified screams ripped through their throats as Albedo's headless body stumbled and swayed. It only lasted a few seconds however because right before their eyes a new head formed on their brother's body.

"See?" Albedo said. He felt a crick in the new formation. He reached behind him to remedy it. A few sharp cracks and it was better. He rolled his shoulders and looked back at his petrified brothers. What was wrong with them? They acted as if they'd never seen someone's head blown off before. They could regenerate too. What was the big deal?

"You idiot!"

Rubedo answered his thoughts by slugging him hard and sending him to the ground.

Rubedo went to hit him again, but Nigredo caught him and held him back. Confused and very upset, Albedo pushed himself up from the ground and into a sitting position.

"Never pull anything like that again!" Rubedo growled as he fought against the restraint of Nigredo's arms. "If you die you can't come back to life!"

Albedo stared wide-eyed at his brothers, rubbing his jaw with the back of his hand. Rubedo stared back threateningly, one slip of Nigredo's hold and he'd go off again. Realization dawned on Albedo slowly as he looked back at them.

"You mean..." he started sadly, "Are you saying you can't regenerate?"

"Of course not!" Rubedo snapped, lunging forward slightly. Nigredo kept his hold, however.

"That's a special ability only you possess." He answered, smooth voice contrasting sharply with Rubedo's anger.

"Only me?" Albedo whimpered. That didn't make any sense! They were all the same. They should all share the same abilities. Even if Nigredo couldn't Rubedo should be able to! They were twins! If they didn't have this ability..."You're both gonna die and leave me behind?"

His voice was cracking as his eyes watered over. Rubedo's stance softened at the sight. Nigredo released his hold on Rubedo's arm. Both of them seemed surprised at the turn this discussion had taken and so quickly. Tears streamed down Albedo's face at the lack of an answer.

"NO!!!" He screamed, pushing himself up and running towards his twin. He wrapped his arms around Rubedo's chest. The impact made him slide down to his knees and Rubedo with him. "I don't wanna be alone!" He kept a tight hold on his brother, sobbing into stomach, "If you die I wanna die too!!"

"Stop it." Rubedo whispered. He placed his arms on his weeping brother's shaking shoulders. He was shocked at all of this, at everything. The feeling of Albedo's trembling broke his heart.

"Don't say things like that." He could feel his own eyes watering. "Now you're making me sad too."

Nigredo moved away from the two to give them more room. "Rubedo!" he heard Albedo scream, "Don't leave me behind!"

"Albedo, stop that." Rubedo cried. He wrapped his arms around his brother, holding him as tight as he could. Albedo couldn't stop. He just couldn't make himself stop crying. A choking fear had planted itself in his mind. He suddenly didn't like the way Rubedo was cradling him. What if something happened to him while his arms were wrapped around Albedo? A rock could hit him, a tree could fall. What about Nigredo? He was standing over there away from them. What if an infected unit had found its way out of the simulator? What if the sky started falling and crushed them under its weight? What if-

_Albedo, calm down. _Rubedo sent.

His presence made him cry even harder. "Rubedo!" he wailed helplessly.

"I'll..." Nigredo started, "I'll go tell Father that you're not feeling well after the last dive. It'll get you out of training."

Nigredo left without an answer, knowing they needed to be alone. Rubedo silently thanked him for that. He held Albedo close to him until his sobs drained his energy and replaced his cries with sharp hiccups. Albedo wasn't sure how long they had been out there but he could feel the air getting cooler and noticed his surroundings darken with the sun's departure.

"Albedo?"

"Rubedo" he answered pathetically.

"Let's go back to our room now, ok?"

Albedo nodded against the fabric of Rubedo's uniform. He limply unwrapped his arms from around his twin. Rubedo stood up and rubbed his legs that had fallen asleep from sitting on his knees for so long. He held out his hand and Albedo took it cautiously. Rubedo helped him to his feet. Albedo kept his eyes on the ground as if afraid to look at him. Rubedo sighed and pulled playfully on his hand.

"Hey Albedo." he said, bending down to catch his purple eyes. Albedo sniffled at the action as silent tears streaked down his cheeks. Rubedo smiled hopefully and grabbed his other hand.

"Don't cry anymore, Albedo." He reached a hand up to wipe away the waterworks but nothing seemed to make Albedo feel better.

"Come on." He said, straightening up. He held onto Albedo's hand tightly, smiling at him. They walked back to their room quietly. Rubedo would occasionally bend down to Albedo's lowered gaze to check on him. Sometimes he'd get a smile out of it, others he'd get a deep frown and a tighter grip on his hand. Rubedo was deeply worried about Albedo. He'd never seen him so afraid in their entire life. No matter what they were doing Albedo had never been this afraid before. He seemed...paralyzed. When they made it back into their room Rubedo led Albedo to his bed and knelt down in front of him.

"Hey there, Alby." Rubedo cooed, reverting to the old nickname he'd given him when they were younger. "Watcha' doin?"

"Rubedo..."

"'Rubedo' nothing!" The red-head exclaimed happily. He jumped onto his twin, knocking him onto his back. Albedo was about to complain when Rubedo started tickling him furiously. "Rubedo!" he laughed, trying to wriggle his way out from under his brother. "Rubedo stop! I can't breathe!"

"You're lying." Rubedo said back. He continued his tickling session for a few more minutes before finally stopping. He flopped down beside Albedo, his legs dangling off the side. Albedo turned his head to look at his him. Rubedo did the same. "Done crying?"

"Rubedo. I'm scared."

Rubedo's eyes turned serious. "Albedo, you know you never have to be afraid. I'm right here."

That sentence triggered his new fear. "But Rubedo!" he yelled, his voice threatening once again to break, "That's just it! You won't always be able to protect me!" He rolled over and grabbed earnestly at his forearm. "What am I going to do?" New tears appeared to trace the tracks old ones had already marked on his face. "Rubedo..."

"No, no, no, Albedo. Don't--" Rubedo panicked. He placed a hand over his brother's. "You don't ever have to worry about that because I'm not going to die."

"Rubedo you can't--"

"Yeah I can. Albedo I'm not planning on dying anytime soon and I don't know anyone who's got it out for me."

Albedo squeezed his arm, "Well what about Nigredo? He won't--"

"Albedo." Rubedo said sternly. "Stop worrying about this. Everyone die--"

Tears flooded Albedo's eyes again. He pressed his face into Rubedo's shoulder and sobbed. "Everyone except me! You're both going to leave me! I can't die! I won't die! You will! Nigredo will! Where does that leave me, Rubedo? I'll be alone! I'll be alone!"

'Al-Albedo no, don't...Don't cry anymore alright?" Rubedo said hurriedly, thinking that he should really be more careful of what he said. He thought for a little while as Albedo clung to him. How in the world was he supposed to console someone about something like this?

"Albedo." he started, concentrating carefully for once on his choice of words. "You know, Albedo the minute we were disconnected our powers split, but we're still the same in some strange way. You know that my cell growth has completely stopped, right?"

Albedo nodded. "That means I'll never age. I'm basically immortal. If you know that why are you still afraid?"

"You're not invincible, Rubedo." Albedo answered, tightening his hold. "You can die. Someone could kill you. You won't live forever. You can't regenerate. I'm invincible. I'm immortal. I can't bear live with you, Rubedo!" Albedo returned to his crying, shaking from his fear. He just couldn't stop, couldn't get the image of all the terrible things that could happen to his brother out of his mind. They were weapons. They were only allowed to leave when a war was waging outside the institute. It would be so easy. Something as simple as a bullet wound could rip his brother's soul from his body and away from him forever. "And what about Nigredo!?" he screamed, "What about him!? We don't even know about his lifespan!'

That caught Rubedo off guard there for a moment. He'd never really thought about it, he'd just assumed Nigredo would live as long as he did. Then again, Albedo had thought all units could regenerate, so he wasn't sure anymore. All of this morbid talk was starting to get to him. He suddenly didn't want to think about any of it.

"Albedo. Don't worry. I'm not going to die. I'm always going to be here for you. Nigredo too. We're not going anywhere any time soon. So don't worry, alright?"

"Kill me."

"What?!" Rubedo exclaimed. He pushed himself away from his brother. "What the hell, Albedo?"

"Kill me, Rubedo please!"

"You...You can't be serious!" Rubedo said, greatly disturbed by his brother's sudden need for death.

"But I am!" He insisted, begging his brother. "Rubedo. If you kill me then I won't have to be afraid anymore!"

Rubedo frowned deeply at the request. "No Albedo. Absolutely not."

"Rubedo--!"

"I said no, Albedo! Stop saying things like that!"

Albedo felt like he was going to go crazy. He held his hands to his head. His eyes scanned the room as if for an answer. "Then I'll do it! I'll kill myself! I don't know how but I will!"

Rubedo leaned forward and grabbed his forearms, pulling his hands away from his head viciously.

"Albedo." he growled. He held both boy's wrists in one hand and placed them on the bed. "You," He continued, pointing at him with the other one. "Will stop this right now and I mean it."

"But Rubedo..."

"No. Nuh-uh. I'm not accepting this. Albedo, why can't you just believe me? Nothing bad is going to happen to Nigredo or to me. We're always going to be here for you, alright?"

Albedo shook his head furiously in denial. "You won't!"

"We will"

"You'll die!"

"We won't."

"You can't say something like that!"

"You can't say that something will kill us within the next five minutes!"

"You can't say it won't!"

"We're fine, Albedo! Be happy about that now! Be grateful for whatever time we do have! We're not like humans and we aren't going to die like humans even if we don't survive as long as you. You will not, absolutely will not kill yourself and if you even think about trying it so help me Albedo I'll close my mind from you completely!"

Albedo's eyes went wide at the threat. He lifted his gaze from his knees to his brother's concerned one. He meant it. "Do you understand me?" Albedo shook his head sadly, flinging tears from the edge of his chin. A silent sob made him tremble again. Rubedo sighed and released his grasp. The minute he did Albedo's arms were around his neck. Wet tears slid down his neck as Albedo tried to calm himself down.

"Don't do that, Rubedo. I hate it when you do that."

Rubedo shook his head. "Don't make me do it."

They were silent for a while, both thinking of what had transpired that day. Rubedo was trying to plan ways to prevent Albedo from hurting himself but the way his body had simply "regenerated" an entire missing head from its body made him wonder if something like that were even possible. He tried to think back as far as he could. He and Nigredo were always getting cuts or scrapes when they played games. In battles and simulations they sometimes got worse, coming home with bullet wounds or broken bones. They were weapons and such things were expected of them in combat. No one came out of training without some kind of wound minor or major. No one except Albedo. Rubedo had never seen anything like that on Albedo's body. Not even a bruise to announce he was susceptible to injury like his brothers.

"You'll stay." Albedo whispered. It was supposed to have been a question, but Rubedo couldn't help but feel as if he were being forced into a promise. "You'll stay until I'm strong enough, Rubedo."

Rubedo nodded, unwrapping his brother's arms from around him and lifting his chin so as to give him the full force of his deep blue eyes.

"I'll stay alive for you, Albedo, if you'll stay alive for me."

"You can't die without my permission." The younger twin said, smiling sadly at his older brother. Even after all that had occurred today Albedo couldn't help but feel absolutely safe and completely

relaxed under his brother's gaze.

"Or you mine."

* * *

Albedo was bored and didn't really feel like eating. Nigredo lifted a black eyebrow toward his brother. "You have to eat, Albedo. I lied for you yesterday you know. If you don't eat or take your medicine I'll be the one who gets punished for it."

"Like I'd care!" Albedo snapped, sticking out his tongue at him. Nigredo rolled his eyes and continued to eat the food given to him. "It tastes all funny. I know they put the medicine in it to try and trick me. I'm not stupid."

Nigredo sighed. "Fine, do you want mine? I'm not hungry and I think it tastes fine. No medicine to make me groggy and unfocused. Training is really hard without you or Rubedo there so please hurry and well...get well."

Albedo accepted happily. "What do I do with this stuff?" he wondered aloud. "Do you think Gaignun would eat it? Would it make him sick?"

Nigredo thought about it for a moment. "Maybe if you gave him a little bit of the chicken it wouldn't but just a little bit, he's still a kitten." The idea made Albedo even happier and he pulled it into smaller pieces for his furry little friend. Nigredo grinned at him, happy that his brother had calmed down after his breakdown yesterday. He was beginning to wonder where Rubedo was when Albedo blurted out. "What are you doing here anyway? Shouldn't you be with Father?" He spat on the word father. Nigredo shook his head. "I was worried so I convinced him that I should spend more time with you and Rubedo."

Albedo was a little surprised that Nigredo would do something like that, but put it aside and started to eat the medicine-free food. Nigredo grabbed the medicinal food and pulled it toward him to pretend he was going to eat it. Speaking of Rubedo, where was he?

"Right here!" A voice shouted behind him. Nigredo jumped at the loud and unexpected noise. Rubedo laughed and pushed him off of his chair and into the floor. He pounced on him, a fork in his hand and a vicious smile on his face. Albedo laughed and got up to see what Rubedo was doing. "Get him, Rubedo!"

"Rubedo stop! You're going to hurt somebody." Nigredo warned.

"Yeah, you!" Rubedo yelled, he brought the fork down to stab his youngest brother but Nigredo didn't flinch like he'd wanted him to. Instead a sharp ringing noise pounded his brain and assaulted his ears. He dropped the fork and fell backwards. Nigredo tackled Rubedo, knocking him over and taking down a few chairs with them. Albedo followed them, urgently awaiting the victor. The other U.R.T.V.'s around stared dumbly at the scene. Albedo glowered at them. They knew that look. After what happened to 623 they weren't about to tell on the variants. Now if a scientist just so happened to be walking by and watching the pair that'd be a little different. Oh well. It wasn't as if they never found themselves in trouble anyway.

"Hah! I've got you now, Nigredo!"

"No you don't!

"Shit! Nigredo that doesn't count!"

"Why? Because you say it doesn't?"

"That's exactly why!"

"That's not fair, Rubedo."

"I was momentarily blinded!"

"By what? My ninja reflexes?"

Albedo laughed. "Nigredo that's ridiculous!"

Nigredo smiled at him. He'd forced Rubedo onto the ground on his stomach. He held the boy's wrists behind his back in one hand and another forced his head onto the cold floor. Rubedo scowled and squirmed under Nigredo's weight, but he wasn't able to get free. "Albedo!" he whined. "You're supposed to help. Don't just stand there!"

Albedo smiled and crossed his arms. "No way. You never lose. It's nice to see you knocked down a notch every once in a while."

Rubedo growled and Nigredo finally got off of him. He offered Rubedo his hand but the boy knocked it away, grumbling curse words to himself. Albedo was about to taunt him along with Nigredo (something that almost never happened) when heard Rubedo hiss.

"Ow. Damn, Nigredo. I think you busted my lip."

"Did I now?" Nigredo asked cheerfully. He walked over to examine it. He whistled at it.

"Yeah, that's pretty bad."

Rubedo raised an eyebrow as if to say 'Really?' and placed the back of his hand against his lip.

"Think I should go to the infirmary?"

He brought it back down to examine it. Albedo paled at the sight. A single drop of ruby liquid stained Rubedo's hand. Everything became silent. Painfully silent. The room suddenly began to spin. His chest gave a painful squeeze as did his stomach and Albedo was absolutely certain he was going to lose the contents of Nigredo's lunch all over the floor. Rubedo looked up from his hand to his wide-eyed twin. "Albedo?"

"I--I--" he spluttered, his eyes locked on the blood. HIs body started to shake. Rubedo realized what he was so upset about and tried to calm him down.

"Albedo it's ok, it's just a scra--"

But Albedo was gone before Rubedo could finish his sentence. He ran out of the cafeteria and through the halls of the Yuriev Institute. He past uniformed scientists and engineers who stared at him curiously. He ran past his room and the simulator until he made it out of the building and into the park. Still he ran, not stopping until he reached the monument he had splattered blood on the day before. He walked over to it, placing his hands on the cool stone. Someone had washed away his blood but Rubedo's...He shook his head again. Blood didn't turn his stomach. It wasn't as if he'd never seen it before but the thought of Rubedo bleeding to death...He didn't want to be here anymore. He didn't want to be near this place. He rejected the sight in front of him and started running again. He turned the sharp corner and stopped. There was a hole in the brick wall surrounding the park's trees. It was dark and mysterious. A tiny forest. It seemed like a safe place. A small clearing lead as if like a path to a large tree in the center. Albedo stared at it for a moment before deciding it was perfect. He jumped over the inch of brick still there and ran toward the tree. He dropped to his knees and dug his fingers into the soil. He scooped it up and pushed it aside. Again and again he dug, mechanically as if he were a machine and this his only purpose. The sun had started to fade but he didn't care. He felt Rubedo and Nigredo's worried minds as they tried to reach him but he ignored them, this was more important.

"I've got to practice." He whispered urgently. "I've got to practice. I have to be ready."

He didn't cry, he didn't whimper or shake. He just dug. That's all that mattered right now. The removal of this dirt. The preparation for his brothers. He had to practice so that he wouldn't cry when it happened. When Nigredo died trying to keep Rubedo from being stupid. When Rubedo died from doing something reckless. When they both died in front of him...He had to practice.

"I've got to practice."

His digging had been urgent and sloppy at first and after a few hours he realized this and started to fix it and shape it. If he was going to practice it, he needed to practice it right. Which brother would this one belong to? Albedo scooped up a handful of dirt and shoved it aside. Graves were rectangular shaped, right? Six feet deep...He'd start small for his first practice grave. He cut the corners into sharp points and pushed his piles of dirt farther away from the opening so that it wouldn't slide in and ruin the smooth sides he was carving out. He smiled to himself at. It was coming out quiet beautifully. This one would be Nigredo's. Rubedo's would go...Albedo looked to his right to one of the long roots visible above the ground. Right there. He smiled. Yes. They would lie side by side. It only made sense that way. He could visit them both everyday. He could talk to them both everyday. He marked the spot of the head of his twin's grave. That one he'd take special care of, now that he knew what to do. He continued his work slowly so that he could make Nigredo's a good one. Nigredo deserved a good grave too. Yeah, but Rubedo's had to be special and intricate. "I wish I could have one." he said aloud to himself. "Yeah, but you can't die, Albedo." He answered back.

"That doesn't seem very fair though." He said to his own answer.

"Rubedo always said that the world wasn't fair." Albedo shrugged. That was true, but Rubedo only said it when he was trying to justify an action he made against his brothers.

"That's why we aren't like other little boys. I don't mind. I just need to be ready."

"Yes! That's a great idea!" He exclaimed. His own exclamation excited him. He wasn't the only one who agreed with him.

"I thought so too! Look at what I've done with these!"

He seemed a little confused however, so he asked himself, "I thought you didn't want them to die though."

"I don't! What a stupid thing to say!"

That upset him."Well it's seems kind of stupid to construct graves for them if you're not excited."

Albedo's hands paused for a moment. 'I'm not happy about it."

"What exactly are you doing then?"

Albedo tilted his head to one side. "You sound funny. Why did your voice change?"

"What are you doing, Albedo?" He thought he felt a hand on his shoulder. Oh that's why. The voice was trying to distinguish itself from his mind. Yeah, that'd make things easier.

"I'm building practice graves for Rubedo and Nigredo. It's so that when they die I won't cry and who knows when that will be?"

"Albedo, you never know. They could live for a long time before that happens."

Albedo frowned and started on his work again. "A long time to them isn't one for me. Time doesn't matter to me anymore. All that matters is that I'm ready. I want to be ready for when Rubedo leaves me all alone. I can't cry when that happens."

"Why not, Albedo? It's ok to cry."

"Not when Rubedo's not around to make it better."

The manifestation squeezed his shoulder tightly but he ignored him. Stupid manifestation. He had been fun at first, but now he was all stupid and worried like Nigredo. He had made a lot of progress. Nigredo's grave was wonderful; all smooth corners and perfection. That sounded like him so it was perfect. The grave was elbow-deep when he bent down to flatten the bottom with his palms. "Do you think Nigredo will like this one? I'm not going to show him. I don't want him to know I'm doing this or Rubedo either. I'll surprise them with how good I can dig. Like a birthday present. They'll be happy. Nigredo's doesn't have to be as complicated as Rubedo's because Nigredo always happy when we do things for him. Rubedo's very picky though. That's ok. I don't mind."

"Albedo..."

Albedo hummed a song as he finished patting everything down. He stared at the hole for a little while before starting to shove piles of dirt back into it. "I wish I could have a grave. I'd sleep on the other side of Rubedo. Nigredo likes to be beside Rubedo and so do I. That's why I put Rubedo in the middle; so that way we wouldn't fight."

"That's very thoughtful of you."

Albedo shrugged. "Nigredo's important too." He pushed piles and piles of dirt into the grave. Whenever a bit spilled over the clearly defined lines of soil he had to stop and make sure every speck and mineral was in the right place.

"I want to die too. Maybe I can get Rubedo to kill me." A lightbulb went off in his head. He smiled. "Yeah! That's what I'll do!"

"Albedo, that's not a good idea."

Albedo nodded, but didn't turn around. He fixed the misplaced dirt and began to push more over into it. "We made a promise yesterday that we wouldn't die without the other's permission. If I can trick Rubedo into killing me that would be the same thing, right?"

"No, it wouldn't."

"But how would I do it?" Albedo continued, suddenly annoyed by the voice that was turning more into a concience than an understanding friend. "Yesterday we had to fight all those units after they were infected...maybe if I can link with U-DO he'll destroy me."

"He wouldn't. Albedo, don't do that to him."

"He would! He'd have to! He's our leader, afterall. He's the Red Dragon. He'll have to!"

"Albedo, please..."

Albedo finished filling in the grave and patted it down. He was very very happy with the way this one turned out. "Now I need flowers. That Sakura girl has flowers. She's always giving them to Rubedo." He hissed.

"I'll give Rubedo flowers everyday. Nigredo too. He'll love me more than that stupid girl."

He got up hastily, shaking off the voice in his mind. He got up and began to search the forest for the most perfect flowers to place on Nigredo's grave.

Nigredo frowned at the sight of Albedo busily picking flowers in the brick wall. He'd come a little too late. Albedo was already gone; lost in the depths of his mind. He hadn't even realized he was standing behind him, talking to him. He decided immediately not to tell Rubedo what Albedo had said. Maybe he should've but he felt like Albedo just needed time. He just needed a little bit of time to handle his shock and it would be all over.

_Rubedo, I found him. _Nigredo sent.

_Really? Where the hell is he? Is he ok?_

_He's fine, Rubedo but I think.._Nigredo heard Albedo talking to himself. His brother bent down, a strange smile on his lips as he placed bright colored flowers on the grave. He snapped back up quickly however, distressed about something. Nigredo heard him exclaim, "Tombstone!" before he disappeared back into the darkness.

_I think we need to leave him alone for a while._

_What? Nigredo it's already dark! That's ridiculous! Bring him back!_

Nigredo shook his head. _No, Rubedo. Just be patient._

_

* * *

_

It was late when Albedo came stumbling into their room. Nigredo was pretending to be asleep and was doing a very good job of it. Gaignun was curled on the other side of his pillow. He lifted his head at Albedo's entrance, then returned to his nap. Rubedo was pacing the floor angrily. The minute Albedo entered Rubedo was on him.

"You idiot! Do you know what time it is? Do you have any idea?!"

"Sorry, Rubedo." Albedo pouted. The good calm feeling left him and was replaced by worry once again. Rubedo looked him up and down, making a face at the sight of his dirty uniform.

"What the hell is this all this? Albedo what have you been doing?"

"Nothing, Rubedo." he said sadly.

Rubedo sighed and ran a hand through his hair stressfully. "Well it doesn't matter now I guess. Just...just go get cleaned up ok."

Albedo nodded. He started off toward their bathroom when Rubedo grabbed his wrist to stop him.

"Albedo." he started, a little frustrated. Albedo stared back already awaiting another scolding, but Rubedo only sighed. "You're really lucky you're a variant. None of the other units would've gotten away with coming in this late."

Albedo smiled and nodded. Rubedo let go of him and allowed him to continue his way to the shower. Rubedo sighed and flopped dramatically onto his bed. Nigredo cracked open a green eye at his brother who did the same with a blue one.

"See? He's fine." Nigredo said, disturbing the kitten by his head who meowed to let him know he was annoyed.

"Yeah but still. What was he doing, Nigredo?"

Nigredo shrugged. "Nothing, just trying to collect himself."

"Psh. By what? Falling into a pile of dirt?" Rubedo scoffed, rolling over onto his back.

"You could say that..."

When Albedo emerged from his bath Nigredo had fallen asleep. Rubedo sat with his back against the head of his modern bed, reading an ancient book.

"Grendel." Rubedo said without Albedo having to ask. The white-haired twin shook his head and sat down on his own bed. He knew Rubedo was angry at him so he wasn't going to try to squirm his way into the mattress beside him. Surprisingly though, Rubedo put down his book and raised a red eyebrow at his twin as if expecting him to come over. Albedo shifted around uncomfortably. "What?" he asked, annoyed.

"You're really going to sleep by yourself tonight? I've got the whole bed to myself? You're not afraid of the dark anymore?"

"More than ever..." Albedo murmured sadly.

Rubedo smiled. "Well...come on. If you don't come now then you'll end up waking me up. So just come on. It's late."

Albedo agreed without protest and snuggled close to his older self. "Rubedo, I'm sorry."

Rubedo nodded, eager to place the events of the past two days behind them so that life could return to normal. Albedo poked at the book in his brother's lap. "Rubedo...would you read to me? I don't think I will be able to sleep."

Rubedo sighed but nodded. He picked up the book and started to find his place but stopped. "Albedo, I'm at a pretty nasty part."

"Which part?"

"You know, the part where Grendel grabs the queen and drags her outside? Maybe I should find something else for you to listen to."

Albedo shook his head and closed his eyes. "That's fine, Rubedo. Go ahead. I won't be scared."

"Sure?"

"Yeah."

Rubedo shifted a little to make himself comfortable as Albedo laid his head on his shoulder to follow along until he fell asleep. Rubedo was so good at reading. His voice was lulling. His lullaby. How would he sleep without it? Rubedo ignored what Albedo had said about not being bothered by the gruesome description and scanned until his eyes met the end of it.

"I hung balanced, a creature of two minds; and one of them said-unreasonable, stubborn as the mountains-that she was beautiful. I resolved, absolutely and finally, to kill myself, for the love of the Baby Grendel that used to be. But the next instant, for no particular reason, I changed my mind.

Balance is everything, sliding down slime....Cut _B_."

* * *

A/N: Yay! One down! Now there's another one already there. Just click that little arrow thingy. Yeah, you know the one. XD Reviews are my muse...eh, just wait and review next chapter if you want to. XD


	33. Albedo continued

A/N: Right. XD You already know the drill.

The only thing I'd like to say is that some of these phrases as the beginning of some of these sections are take from John Gardener's Grendel.

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and I said that last chapter...blah. XD Just disregard me.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 33  
Albedo (Frère Rubedo)

"Frère Rubedo, Frère Rubedo. Dormez-vous? Dormez-vous?" Albedo sang as he bent down to pick a dark blue flower. This one reminded him of Rubedo's eyes. Not quiet as amazing, however.

"Sonnez les matines! Sonnez les matines!" He started to get up, but found a pink one that reminded him of Rubedo because of its perfect circle of petals; six in all.

"Ding dang dong! Ding dang dong!" He was in a very good mood that day despite the fact that Rubedo had been held back for some sort of additional testing and Nigredo had begun to see their father daily as he had before Albedo's meltdown.

"Are you sleeping? Are you sleeping? Rubedo? Rubedo?" He sang, picking up a white one to add so that Rubedo would know who it was from. Its steam was bent and the petals were uneven; some rounded while others were sharp.

"Morning bells are ringing! Morning bells are ringing!" He smiled widely at a certain red flower he found. He ran to it eagerly and bent down to pick it up. It was a rose, a beautiful perfect red rose.

"Ding dong ding! Ding dong ding!" Usually when Albedo was left alone like this he couldn't stand it. He attacked other U.R.T.V.'s, cried outside the examination room, threatened the staff...

"Frère Rubedo? Are you sleeping?" This one was perfect for Rubedo. If Rubedo was a flower, this was the exact one he would be. He reached for the stem but pulled back when he felt tiny pricks against his skin. He yanked his hand back with a tiny yelp. Five small holes had been punctured into his skin, leaving five tiny circles that bled. Albedo sighed as his skin reformed within seconds; the blood still visible. Perfect.

"Dormez-vous? Rubedo?" He wrapped his hand around the stem, allowing the thorns to sink in as far as they could. He hissed at the pain. It felt...good. Very good.

"Sonnez les matines!" This really was the perfect flower. Roses were beautiful, yet painful. They were perfect, yet flawed. A rose and its thorns. Rubedo and Albedo.

"Morning bells are ringing!" Thorns protect the rose. He held the stem in his hand up to the sun. Blood stained both the chlorphyll and painted the pale pigment of his skin. Glorious.

"Ding dang dong." This bouquet was perfect for Rubedo's grave. He would love it. He got up, finally satisfied that this would be a combination deserving of his twin. He stepped up and began his way back to his practice graves. Blood from his hand stained the perfect white of another flower.

"Ding dong ding."

* * *

_So much for meaning as quality of life! I would kill her and teach them reality.  
__Grendel the truth-teller, phantasm-tester!  
__It was what I would be from this day forward  
__-my commitment, my character for as long as I lived-  
__and nothing alive or dead could change my mind!_

"Please, Nigredo. I just need this one thing and I'll never bother you again! Please!"

Nigredo wasn't sure, but Albedo wouldn't let him say no.

"I just want to talk to Sakura! It's about Rubedo! It's really really important."

"I don't know, Albedo. Does Rubedo know about this?" Albedo rolled his eyes.

"Yes, I assume I am that stupid. Albedo, I didn't think you cared anything about Sakura."

Albedo kicked at the ground. "I haven't been nice to her, Nigredo. I want to apologize."

Nigredo sat on his bed, playing with the growing kitten in his arms. "I'm not sure if I believe that, Albedo."

Albedo groaned and stamped a foot. "Listen, I've changed a lot, Nigredo. I know now that I won't have eternity to share with you or Rubedo and..."

Albedo averted his purple gaze onto the floor. "I just want to make the best of it. If that means being nice to Sakura for Rubedo then I will. Please, Nigredo?"

He watched Nigredo's face carefully as he waited for an answer. Afraid that he might get suspicious of him, he opened his mind for his younger brother. Nigredo's eyes softened at the gesture. As Albedo had expected, that was enough.

"Alright, Albedo. How do you want to do this?"

Nigredo nodded to Albedo as he climbed into the dive-pod. _Are you ready, Albedo_?

_Ready. _

It was dark in the institute. Staff shifts were over by now and even Dmitri wouldn't be up at such an hour. Rubedo was perhaps the heaviest sleeper either of them knew. He wouldn't miss them.

_Albedo, are you sure that I should leave?_ Nigredo asked as he pressed keystrokes that commanded the pods to shift backwards.

_On the off-change that Rubedo wakes up you should be there, Nigredo._

_And what about you? Will you be alright by yourself?_

Albedo smiled and turned his head toward the glass where Nigredo was sitting.

_Do you not trust me, Nigredo?_

_...Get ready._

He felt a sharp pinch in his neck and a loud gasp escaped his throat. A white light engulfed his mind and vanished again just as quickly. He waited for the light to settle before opening his eyes. Sakura's house. It was night here also. The moonlight shone beautifully onto the grass and sunflower field, giving everything a mystical feeling. The house was silent; the calming kind. The kind of sight that would lull one to sleep if stared at too long. Albedo made a face at the sight He had never been exactly sure if the day ever turned to night in a place like this. He shrugged his shoulders. Whatever. It would make things a lot easier. He started to walk towards the steps. He was going to show Rubedo just what it would feel like. He began to make his way up the porch steps. He was going to show him what it would feel like to lose someone special; to live without them. It only seemed fair. Rubedo would understand reality then. He would understand Albedo's reality. The darkness of the porch surprised him. It seemed so much darker here than in the yard illuminated in silver. His steps echoed on the wood beneath as he reached for the door handle.

"Rubedo?"

Albedo swirled around at the voice. "Who's there?"

He heard the creak of the porch swing and small, light steps echoing off pine. "Rubedo?"

Albedo sighed as moonlight flickered off the figure of a small girl just a little shorter than him. Light brown hair framed her pretty face and the white dress she always wore shoe silver. Sakura.

"No." he answered. Damn. She was awake. But then again that had been a possbility. Sakura slept whenever she wanted to, her mind never tired. In fact, the very first time they met her she had been asleep in the middle of the day. The confusion in her eyes changed to joy.

"Albedo." She said happily. "You scared me. I didn't know you would come to visit me. Is Rubedo with you?"

Albedo frowned. "No. I came alone. You were expecting him?"  
The girl blushed and averted her eyes. "Oh no, but I couldn't imagine anyone else bothering to come and see me." She giggled and looked up at him again. "But you came, Albedo! Do you want to play?"

Albedo snorted at her. "No. I don't want to 'play'. I've got something I came here to do."

She tilted her head to one side, "Really? Like what? Do you need help?"

"I don't need help from a stupid girl!" He growled, grabbing her arm and pulling her forcefully to him.

"Ow, Albedo." she winced, "You're hurting me."

"I know," he whispered deadly, "And I don't care."

Sakura pulled against his grip in an attempt to get away but he held on tighter. "Stop struggling."

"What did I do?" she asked, suddenly. "Is that why Rubedo didn't come? Is he mad at me?"

Albedo felt disgusted at the way she said his name. It was too sweet, like she thoroughly enjoyed breathing it.

"Rubedo would never be mad at you. He loves you." Albedo stopped as realization hit him. Rubedo loved Sakura. If Sakura was gone Rubedo wouldn't be happy anymore. As much as he wanted Rubedo to understand...it wasn't worth it. It wasn't going to lengthen his brothers' lifespan or shorten his. Fine. He released her arm and stepped back. He knew a way to shorten his even without killing Sakura. U-DO lived in this girl's mind. All he'd have to do was find it, infect himself and then Rubedo wouldn't have a choice.

"Then...are you...are you mad at me, Albedo?"

"I'm always mad at you." Albedo hissed. "I hate you, you filthy girl."

Sakura looked as if she were surprised. Her lips turned down into a frown, hurt visible in her eyes. Albedo didn't care. How could she not notice his burning hatred of her? The way she giggled at everything Rubedo said. The way she always flirted with him, trying to seduce him...

Albedo shook his head at the foolish girl and started his way back down the stairs. If he remembered correctly, the source of this girl's illness was concentrated at the beach. If he started now, he might get there before morning. He smirked. Not that it mattered. Once he was infected no one but Rubedo would be able to destroy him anyway. Perhaps he should just take his time. Sakura rubbed her arm absently as Albedo pushed past her to he walked down the stairs.

"Albedo...I..."

He ignored her. He would never have to see her again after today. He pushed all thoughts of Sakura out of his mind as he made his way through her subconcious and replaced them with thoughts of Rubedo. The fact that Rubedo would be the one to bring about his death gave him a strange feeling. He embraced it. What a beautiful feeling. It would only be fitting that Rubedo would grant him such a blessing.

* * *

_I changed my mind. It would be meaningless, killing her.  
__As meaningless as letting her live.  
I__t would be, for me, mere pointless pleasure, an illusion of order for this one frail, foolish flicker-flash in the long dull fall of eternity._

Albedo had always been afraid of the dark. Very very afraid. If Nigredo or Rubedo were not around he would sit down and cry, trying to find them through their link. Even when he knew he had regenerative powers the darkness had terrified him. Only his brothers could bring him out of that. The simple sight of one of them brought such a relief to life in his chest that he couldn't describe. It was so strong that it seemed to make his head spin a little, bring about an abnormal high. Because he was safe. Because he wouldn't need to be scared anymore. That was because before he had assumed everything else that could cause him harm would live just as long as he did and was as indestructible as he was. Naivete has such an unusual beauty to it. Such a trait is surely endearing. Albedo snickered to himself. Yes, endearing.

He made it through the forest carefully, getting lost only a few times. Things tended to reshape and twist in the dark; play mischievous tricks on the eyes and mind. He could sense he was getting close. A small pulse resounded in his mind. It was a familiar foreboding one. He was close. He paused for a moment to try and decide from which direction it was coming when he heard something behind him. He snapped around in time to see Sakura stumbling over a branch in the path.

"What are you doing here?" He demanded.

She pushed herself up from the ground and dusted off her white dress. "I um..." She shook dirt from her hair and pulled out a twig from it. "I wanted to make sure you were ok. Rubedo said that you were afraid of the dark."

Albedo flushed with anger. "That's none of your buisness, woman!"

"Albedo, what did I do to make you so upset? Would it help if I...apologize?"

Albedo walked over to her, staring her down. "You're going to leave me alone! I'm busy!"

"No!" She said, surprising him by standing on her tip toes to stare back. "I want to know why now you're mad at me and what I did! I already said I was sorry!"

The action set him back a little, but he shook his head. "Look, I came by myself for a reason. I don't want you here. It's too dangerous and Rubedo would be crushed if anything happened to you."

"Dangerous?" she asked, tilting her head again in the cute way that Rubedo liked. Albedo hated it. "But if something happened to you, then he'd be upset too."

Albedo's face fell a bit. "Not half as much as you."

Sakura seemed as if she were about to protest when a strange wave passed over his left shoulder. Sakura gasped and backed up a step. Damn. She was too close. Albedo looked behind him. Was U-DO moving toward him? Was it even possible for the waves to seek him out?

"Albedo!" she gasped as one got dangerously close to her. Albedo blocked it from her. He knew a simple wave wouldn't be able to infect him. He had to link with the mass collected at the beach. This wouldn't work! Not with Sakura there. He stopped another wave.

"Sakura, go home!" he yelled angrily. She shook her head. "I didn't ask!"

The waves were becoming stronger, more plentiful. It was beginning to be too much for Albedo to handle on his own. He almost missed another one and the girl still wouldn't leave. He was distracted by particularly troublesome wave when he heard Sakura cry out to him. He started to turn but he wasn't fast enough. The wave was going to collide with him head on. He smiled, not exactly the way he had planned it but---Sakura!

Albedo didn't have time to think, to move, to push the idiot girl out of the way. He didn't even have time to imagine pushing her out of the way before the wave collided with her. She fell to the ground sharply, dark waves evaporating from her body. A vicious shaking rumbled through the ground. The dark, once peaceful sky screamed with shrill lightening and monstrous thunder. Everything was beginning to collapse. Her very subconscious. Albedo dropped down onto his knees beside the girl. He stared down at her quivering body. No no no no no! She was still breathing, there had to be something anything he could do to save her. For Rubedo, he had to save her for Rubedo! She whimpered, her breathing became heavy as the world convulsed and shook around him. She raised her eyes to him. "Why...why did you do this?" Albedo asked, astonished, frustrated and scared. His throat clenched at the thought of how upset Rubedo would be after her death. This was all...this was all his fault.

"Rubedo is...he will..." Then he remembered what she had said earlier. "You...did you do this for Rubedo?"

"I..." she gasped, her eyes slowly closing, "I did it for you. To save you, Albedo."

Albedo couldn't believe what he was hearing. "For me?"

"Do you..." she asked, as the world slowly began to dissolve around him, "Forgive me now, Albedo?"

He stared wide-eyed at the figure of Sakura vanish before his eyes.

There was no definition for Rubedo's reaction to her death. Anguish? Agony? Despair? Albedo didn't even want to come close to trying to describe it. Rubedo's pain assaulted him, twisting his heart with a devastation that wasn't his own. He watched the news sink into the boy's brain. He watched the realization and accusation arise in Nigredo's green eyes all focused at him. Rubedo had screamed and denied every word of it. He could save her! Was the message sent down their link. He had ran to the pods, broken one in rage as he tried to dive. He ripped it apart when it wouldn't respond and scientists were starting to fear the Red Dragon's power might ignite. Then fallen to his knees, sobbing. Nigredo had ran to him, wrapping him in arms and attempting to calm him down. Albedo had only stood in the background as the door shut quietly behind him.

"No Sakura." He whispered. "I will never forgive you."

* * *

_He had glimpsed a glorious ideal, had struggled toward it and seized it and come to understand it, and was disappointed.  
__One could sympathize._

Weeks upon weeks past. Rubedo had barely begun to heal from the girl's death. Nigredo had stopped attending his meetings with their father. Albedo continued his graves.

Albedo felt so horrible about Sakura's death that he stayed as far away from Rubedo as possible unless Rubedo asked for him specifically. He was a danger to Rubedo. He would only hurt Rubedo. He needed to distance himself from Rubedo if he could...if he could...

Nigredo tried to talk to him, comfort him but nothing worked. He needed to be distant. He needed to focus on what was important. What was so very very important. He added tombstones to graves.

Rubedo finally convinced him to calm down.

"I need you more than ever now, Albedo. You can't do this to me. Please, I need you."

Albedo had nodded in automatic agreement, but Rubedo had not been satisfied.

"Albedo, it wasn't your fault. Please, let it go and help me. Continue to live for me, Albedo. Don't--don't put me through that again. Ever."

"I won't, Rubedo. I promise." Albedo whispered.

That same night Albedo had fallen asleep beside his brother for the first time since Sakura had died. He felt upset that he should have the privilege of sleeping beside his brother after all of this. But it felt good to be able to lie next to him, to feel safe, to actually sleep instead of stare restlessly at a ceiling questioning fears and past actions that could not be changed and for the first night in his entire life Rubedo had cried on him. But when he awoke later that night Rubedo was missing. Nigredo too. His eyes widened out of sleep immediately as he pushed himself up from his bed in order to be absolutely certain that he was imagining things. This was a nightmare! No, no no. He need to calm down. He took in a deep breath and exhaled it just as slowly. He pulled gently on their mental link and found them outside. He got up, wrapping a sheet around him before running out of the institute. It took him a little while, but he finally found them. They sat together on a bench facing the old piano room Sakura had used so long ago. Albedo was relieved at the sight until he noticed Nigredo holding Rubedo's hand. Such a thing shouldn't have seemed unusual if Nigredo's face wasn't so flushed at the time and his heart hadn't been beating so fast. The fact that his mind was shut so tightly and the quick way that Rubedo jumped at his voice only added to Albedo's suspicions.

"I-I woke up and no one was there. I told you not to leave me!" For some reason Albedo felt his eyes water. The statement pulling at old fears in his heart.

"It's ok, Albedo. Don't cry." Rubedo said walking over to him quickly.

Albedo threw his arms around his brother, holding him tightly. "Everything's going to be fine now." Rubedo said into his ear. "Isn't that right, Nigredo?"

And somewhere from the warmth of Rubedo's breath on his neck he heard Nigredo say, "Right."

But it wasn't alright. None of it was alright. As Albedo sat with his brothers for the third descent on planet Miltia Albedo knew something bad was going to happen. His grip on Rubedo's arm tightened and his wariness of Nigredo expanded. Nigredo's eyes briefly caught Albedo's, begging him not to tell Rubedo about their father.

_I won't._ He sent. _If you won't hurt him. _

_I can control myself, Albedo. I promise._

Albedo nodded.

The U.R.T.V.s entered the facility of Labyrinthos. This was real. This was actually going to happen. Their face off with U-DO...the time had finally come. Nine units set themselves around a large pentagon cut away from the floor. Nigredo stood to Rubedo's left while Albedo clung with both hands to him on his right. Rubedo and Nigredo were focused and ready but Albedo was anything but. He shook and looked away from the opening in Labyrinthos' floor. He couldn't understand why he was so afraid. He had purposely dove into Sakura Mizrahi's mind in order to face U-DO but this time it was different. He had already promised that he wouldn't kill himself. U-DO was dangerous and one slip up could end up breaking that promise. The thought of Rubedo breaking down like that again terrified him. What if the waves hit Rubedo or Nigredo? So many things could go wrong! He remembered closing his eyes so tightly and trying to pretend he was somewhere else. Wishing _so bad _he were somewhere else. The standard units began to prepare for the arrival of U-DO. One by one they lifted their left hands, bracing their arms by placing their right hand underneath their left bicep. The open palm would act as the barrel of a gun as the right one sent concentrated energy through the limb. Rubedo didn't have right arm to use. He waited until all of his brothers had prepared themselves before raising his left hand.

"Alright, open spiritual link. All U.R.T.V.'s match your individual waves to mine." he commanded. Albedo tried to move, but he couldn't do it. He was too afraid. Rubedo noticed this and leaned over to grab his right arm and place it out for him instead of his left so that Albedo could still hold his hand. He pulled back again just as quickly. The waves were advancing fast. "Here it comes." he warned and just as first strings of U-DO pulled themselves from the hole the link was completed. A thin circle of blue connected by each U.R.T.V.'s palm appeared, blocking the strings as they tried to impact the bio weapons. Everyone held their ground, concentrating solely on the circle's construction. There was no room for mistakes. One wave moved too close to Albedo, impacting right where his hand was outstretched. He cried out and pulled back for a second but pulled himself together enough to outstretch his arm again.

"Rubedo, I'm scared." Albedo said, shivering. He looked to his brother for comfort.

"Just concentrate, Albedo." Rubedo said softly, "Just do it like in training and you'll be fine."

Albedo nodded shakily and squeezed Rubedo's right hand fearfully.

"It's ok, Albedo." Rubedo whispered again and Albedo relaxed a little. If he didn't calm down then he could be the cause of something wrong. He didn't want that to happen again. He turned his gaze back to the thin line of energy. Everything is going to be ok. He told himself. Everything was going to be ok. He was so intent on keeping his connection that he didn't notice Rubedo's sudden flinch or the dropping of his hand until his twin was backing up and away from their link. Nigredo noticed it too.

"Rubedo?" he asked quickly as he tried to balance his mind on the task at hand and his brother.

Albedo didn't like the look on Rubedo's face or the way he wasn't answering. His focus on the link was slipping but unlike Nigredo he was having a hard time finding a medium between Rubedo and U-DO.

"Emergency cut-off," Rubedo commanded. "Shutting off spiritual link"

The standard U.R.T.V.'s who hadn't noticed their leader's sudden actions turned their heads toward him sharply.

"I know what I'm doing." Rubedo said to them. "Even though we think of them as mental waves the resulting anti-particle collision with us will be converted directly into thermal energy. Dad knew everything. That bastard!"

"The link is already complete." Nigredo said urgently. "We can't stop it."

But Rubedo wouldn't listen. He tried to pull himself away from the link, but Albedo still had hold of his right hand. He tugged harder and Albedo tugged back. "No! Rubedo, don't let go!" he begged. What was he thinking? They'd never been told anything like that in training. If they stopped now, U-DO would be free to infect whoever it touched. Rubedo ignored him and pulled harder.

"No!" he shouted, "I'm cutting the link."

Albedo looked desperately toward the waves that were impacting their link before begging his brother again, "Don't let go!"

His begging didn't do anything however and no matter how hard he tried to hold on he felt Rubedo's fingers slip away from his. Instantly the circle of light disappeared. The standard units looked around at each other in confusion and fear before the first of the waves struck. It hit them one by one, killing them on contact. Albedo was too busy to care about them. He reached out for Rubedo again, desperate to feel him close. Why was he walking away? He whimpered, tears of fear sliding down his face. His eyes begged Rubedo to come back, to just pull him away if he needed to be over there that badly. He reached and stretched for him again but Rubedo wasn't paying attention to him anymore. His dark blue eyes were concentrated on something behind him. He turned his head to see what it was. U-DO. A giant string of energy loomed above him, as if it wanted him and no one else. Albedo stood frozen. He tried to call for Rubedo but he couldn't form the words. He heard footsteps or he thought the did...quick footsteps...Nigredo? No. He needed...He needed...The wave engulfed him. It invaded his link, pulling and twisting his mind as if it were clay to mold. Visions flashed through his mind at a painful speed. Voices screamed at him all at once. Civilizations crumbled, humanity disintegrated, dimensions crashed. He let out a terrifying scream and grabbed his head before letting lose another one.

He could hear someone calling his name but his screams were drowning them out. His body jerked and lurched forward onto the metal beam. He cried out again, trying to shut it all it out.

"Make it stop!"

Albedo...a deep gentle voice boomed.

Then everything stopped. The pain, the voices...everything. He sat hunched over on his knees, staring through the holes in the metal beam underneath him.

"Al-Albedo...?"

The world was so much different now. Albedo blinked. Had the world always been this way? Had everything always been so red and sharp and twisted...? A low chuckle escaped his throat. Yes! Yes it had! His chuckles grew into hysterical laughter.

"Now!" he laughed, "Now I see! Now I understand!"

"Al...bedo..."

The sound of his name caused him to laugh again but he couldn't tell what it was. Was it a scream or a laugh or anguish or all of them? Yes! All of them pushed together and connected. Like he and Rubedo! A sound interrupted his laughter and he was certain that his brother's could hear it too. He could feel it. He grinned. What a beautiful melody! When had the world become such an extrodinarly morbid tune played upon the instrument of agony by the idea of sanity. What an illusion!

"The song..." he laughed, "The song is...I..." he really couldn't stop himself from laughing. It was all to funny. Why hadn't he realized all of this before? Why hadn't he seen the visions of the end long ago? It was so clear now! U-DO knew! And what did he know? Why more than anyone!

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall...show me...define me!" He turned to face Rubedo. "I am the infinite telomerase! I am not an anti-existence! I am the perfect chain!!!"

He stood up from the floor, continuing his insane laughter. He opened one purple eye to Nigredo and grinned. "And what are you? What are you? Do you know? Do you know, Rubedo?"

Nigredo stood frozen at the sight of Albedo. He had tried to grab him away from the wave before it devoured him once he realized Rubedo wasn't moving but he'd been to late. He was so close Albedo could almost touch him. "EXE-CU-TION-ER!!!" He declared. "Rubedo! Rubedo! Rubedo! He walks that line! Knock him lose! Slay the beast! Nigredo! NIGREDO!"

He reached for his youngest brother but missed in his delusion.

"Run, Nigredo!" Rubedo screamed, grabbing his arm and running with him. Albedo continued to laugh.

"Dragon take the slayer! Romeo and his Juliet! Run! RUN EXECUTIONER!"

He staggered his way toward their exit. The world pulsated around him in such a new, fascinating way. If he'd known what U-DO could teach him! This was beautiful! He must introduce this new world to Rubedo. Before he died, he would have to let him experience it. Power coursed through his veins with such strength he felt they would explode. "Oh I hope they do." He giggled to himself. "I hope. I hope. I hope." He sang.

He swayed to the music as he walked. Nigredo was too dangerous to be kept alive. What had he been thinking before? How dare Rubedo run away from him. He was only trying to teach Nigredo a little thing about manners. Thou shalt not kill and things of that nature. If he didn't learn, he might hurt him. Emotions and voices flickered through his mind. He was constantly changing. Happy five seconds, upset the next. Angry then scared, lonely then confident. He never said he liked continuity. He frowned. A particular voice in his head was telling him that Rubedo was unfair for leaving him behind. Another interjected and screamed that Nigredo should die. A prominent one pointed out that they abode by the rule of the rose. One shouted that thorns protect the rose. The next declared that Rubedo was perfection and would bring salvation. The fifth yelled at the others that only Rubedo needed to survive this battle. The first screamed again for Nigredo's downfall and the rest cheered. Albedo shrugged. Whatever they wanted. He didn't care anymore. He just wanted to listen to that song. That lovely, lovely song. The voices nodded. "Well," Albedo said to them, "Time to kill the executioner."

They all agreed happily. He laughed at them. What a delight! So many people who understood him! "Nigredo. It looks like poor little Albedo has had an accident. Let us hope you don't have one also."

One of the voices directed Albedo toward the door and he complied. Where ever whenever it didn't matter. He just needed to find Nigredo and end this. The voices were right. How was it fair that Nigredo got Rubedo's good graces while Albedo didn't? Nigredo was only a danger to his delicate rose. He began to make his way up the dark steps and onto the battlefield he could already hear. He grinned wickedly.

"Frère Rubedo. Frère Rubedo. Where are you? Where are you? I hear someone calling. I hear someone calling. Why don't you? Why don't you?"

* * *

A/N: Phew! Done. Wow those took a while. A really long while. Well I hope they weren't terrible. I'm just glad I got them done. CX We'll get back to present Albedo's dead time next chapter. But I didn't think it'd be fair to write an extremely long chapter and make you wait two weeks...eh. Whatever. It's five o clock in the morning and no one cares. XD Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people. C:

Oh! And TOO and Ganon XD I'm sorry I've gotten behind on my reading b/c of L and these chapters. I shall review your stories tomorrow. I just can't see straight right now I'm so tired. XD


	34. Animal

A/N: I'm sorry guys. I know I promised a few of you a weekly update but one of the "friends" I had this story dedicated to and I got into a fight and I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue it. I got over myself however XD and now here's an update.

Thanks goes out to:

To the ridiculous Ms. Stairsin (who is totally imaginary), for singing Maximum the Hormone's _What's Up People_! very badly to cheer me up. XD Hey, at least you know the words.

The slightly annoying Albedo's Jerusalem (who's probably imaginary), for relentlessly poking me in the side once he realized this story hadn't been updated on time. I'm serious. XD I could FEEL it.

The beautiful Ganon XD (who's real but then again I could be stupid and only THINK she's not imaginary) for calming me down enough to actually clear my head. Man do I have a temper.

To the four-year-old Rayna Arwin Tinker who's currently trying to break my legs. XD

And to all of my reviewers, b/c if this story didn't have so many readers then we would be burying it in one of Albedo's practice graves.

We all know I don't won Xenosaga b/c it's so grammatically correct.  
We all also know that won is the new way to spell own. XD I think that only furthers the fact that I don't own Xenosaga.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 34  
Animal

Disintegration. Delicate separation of particles. His very soul was pulling apart from itself in soft and visible patches of light. He had been through this scenario before. The same-old same-old occurrence of false death. He wasn't exactly sure what to think of it this time. The dissipation of his body felt different somehow. He chuckled darkly. So this was what the path to Oblivion. It seemed darker than he had envisioned. Less of the holy choir and more of the inferno Dante had constructed in his momentary fit of genius. Was it genius? Had Satan or God lent a helping hand to his constructive mind or had it been just a slip of faith accompanied by strange delusions and misconceptions of religious script?

He sighed, for once frustrated with himself. Philosophical thoughts and imagery didn't seem appropriate. He heard the hard click of heeled boots. Citrine. So she had become his executioner. This was not how he had planned his death. It was far from the ideal scenario that had consumed his mind in its seductive grip. That must have been the reason that this death seemed so dark because it had been done by her instead of by Rubedo. He felt a little cheated. This was now the second time a suicide plan had gone awry. However, just because one plans something it doesn't necessarily mean that they will like the outcome. Even if they know about it beforehand. Even if they know this is probably the only way. Albedo wheezed madness as the world pulsated around him in time with his fading heartbeat.

He enjoyed the feeling but Rubedo was panicking. He was screaming at Albedo to stay. That was a first and admittedly kind of nice. Albedo should tell him. He should relay the message so it'd be easier for him to defeat Citrine. He saw a flicker of something in the red warning light of the Quarantine Hangar. He sincerely hoped that Rubedo wouldn't be so stupid as to miss something so important. No, not Rubedo. The world was shuddering in a wave-like way mimicking the form of sonic materialization. He curiously played with the sensation in his mind, pondering if it was sanity that was seeking him in his last moments. He hoped not. He'd always loved the colors and delusions that reigned him. He felt as if he was losing his domain.

Sanity was so bland, so blasé. It was disheartening when one knew their limitations. Nothing good could possibly happen if he became rational because afterall, one could not change the world without a little insanity. Wihout that push, that mental incentive to knock down the rotting construction and bring truth to the blinded mortals. A nice guy would do this for them. He would tell them, right? Hello! You've got it all wrong!

Jr. was still begging but he wasn't going to answer. This was so much darker. It could be another trick by his immortality. Maybe that's why he didn't answer. Even as he heard the pleading of his eldest brother he didn't want to admit defeat. He sighed inwardly as the particles of his neck gave way to nothingness and simply sent:

_I love you, Rubedo._

* * *

"Albedo." Jr. whispered, "Albedo. Albedo. Albedo..."

"Jr..."

"He's gone. He's _gone_."

"Jr."

Jr. shook his head at chaos' voice. "I was supposed to protect him. Hell, I was supposed to do a lot of things! I was supposed to be the leader, I was supposed to kill U-DO, I was supposed to save Sakura..." He choked on her name. "And now Albedo's...It's all my fault all over again."

"No Jr., It's not." MOMO said softly.

"It is!" He yelled, causing her to jump. She pulled away from him slightly and looked to chaos in confusion.

"Jr." chaos pressed.

Jr. sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "MOMO I-I didn't mean to...I just..."

MOMO nodded and gave him a sad smile which made him feel even worse. He sighed and returned his gaze to the blood-stained floor beneath him. Albedo had slaughtered all these men and the only thing he could offer their bodies was pain over the loss of their murderer.

"It's ok, Jr. I'm sorry."

"You didn't do anything, MOMO. You're...you're fine. Don't worry about me. Please don't."

"Jr. We have to go." chaos said, rubbing his friend's back soothingly. "Albedo wouldn't want this."

"Yes he would." Jr. snapped. "He would want me to sit right here. He would want me to be miserable that he wasn't around. He would want me to hurt. He would!"

MOMO glanced worriedly at chaos. He mouthed an 'it's ok' to her to calm her down and turned back to Jr.

"Jr., Albedo's not the only brother you have. What about Gaignun?"

That's right. Gaignun still needed him. Gaignun was still trapped. But Jr. didn't want to fight anymore. He didn't want to do anything. He felt like he belonged on the floor with these bodies. It was his fault. He pushed himself up from the floor, still gripping the right side of his chest. "I can't help Gaignun."

"What do you mean, Jr.?"

"Albedo..." he sighed, "Albedo was the only one who knew how to save him."

MOMO and chaos looked to each other for a moment. "Jr. we can figure something out--"

"No we can't! It's over, alright? It's over!" He felt like sinking to the floor again. "Albedo promised me that he would help me. He never told me what he was going to do or how he was going to do it. I just...I should have made him tell me. I should have forced it out of him. I could've done it. Why didn't I do it? Dammit!"

"Jr..." MOMO reached out to hesitantly place a hand on his shoulder. "We can't just sit here. Gaignun wouldn't just sit here. If...if he knew you were in trouble he wouldn't let anything stop him. You know that, Jr. It's not like you to give up."

Jr. shook his head. Gaignun was gone. He'd been gone for a long time and there was no telling if he was even alive. If Jr. knew Dmitri as well as he thought he did...

"Albedo died because he wouldn't wait for me. He just needed to wait for me and I could have helped him then we wouldn't be in this mess. Then Gaignun would be ok. I would be ok and Albedo wouldn't have..."

"Albedo died because he was trying to help you...save Gaignun?" chaos attempted to clarify. Jr. nodded. chaos pushed himself up and allowed a smile to grace his features. "Jr., Albedo gave his immortality in order to help you. In order to make you happy, didn't he?"

Jr. scowled at chaos' words. "I don't see what the hell that has to do with anything."

chaos placed his hands on Jr.'s shoulders and bent down to stare eye level with him. "Albedo gave his life for you, Jr." chaos swept an arm around the room, "Every soldier in here died in your name. He cleared a path just for you, Jr. and as much of an unpleasant picture as that paints you owe it to every spirit in here, to Albedo...And to Gaignun to finish this. Jr., this is no longer about you."

"It's just...I'm not strong enough." Jr. said, averting his gaze from the calm angel.

"Not strong enough?" MOMO said, surprised at him. "Since when have you ever been not strong enough?"

She grabbed his arm not so hesitantly this time and forced him to face her.

"MOMO?"

"You're the strongest person I know. When you're around I know I don't have to be afraid. You always take care of everything and you make it look so easy...Like it's nothing."

She looked down at the floor, pink curls falling from her small hat. "I know you're scared but...But I don't think anything could ever take you down, Jr. I believe in you and so does chaos and I know Gaignun does probably more than any of us."

Jr. stared at speechless at her for a moment. The only thing registering in his mind was 'wow' at the way she'd just basically told him off. It made him feel a little silly and stupid for even thinking of backing out now. If MOMO could be strong, then he could too. "Yeah, you're right. I don't know what I was thinking."

She looked up at him. "I'm pretty much invincible. Albedo couldn't even take me."

"That's right, Jr." chaos nodded. "Are you ready?"

"Hell yeah. Let's get out of here. I've got things to do."

MOMO smiled and hugged his arm. "Ok, Jr."

* * *

Jr. hadn't seen the Durandal since the night Dmitri had revealed himself so when he finally stumbled through the last of the wreckage and into the ship he was stunned. MOMO felt the tension in his muscles at the sight of it. Everyone he knew lay slaughtered and bleeding. The warning lights seemed to drip blood from above and down onto them. He felt like the ship itself had been gutted and left to die.

"Jr..."

"MOMO, please don't. I'm not...not cool-headed enough to deal with this right now. I can't stay calm after seeing something like this. You were right, chaos. This isn't about me anymore."

chaos didn't respond. MOMO held onto Jr. tighter.

"Well let's go. The Quarantine Hangar, right MOMO?"

MOMO nodded and the three of them walked to the loop line. Jr. hadn't been sure it would work after the collision but luckily it did. It jerked to a start and shuffled its way from one hangar to the next.

The Quarantine doors were unlocked when the three stepped out of the transport. Jr. was happy that at least this place wasn't littered with dead bodies. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. He had to control himself. Gaignun's life depended on it. "Up ahead, right MOMO?"

"Yes."

"Ok then, let's go."

They made their way through a series of sliding doors until they finally reached the last one. Jr. stopped abruptly at the final door.

"Hello, number 666. It's been a long time."

"Ci-Citrine..." Jr. whispered, surprised and unsure of what to make of her presence.

"Jr.?" chaos asked, walking up to stand beside him.

"I'm so happy to see you. You're the only comrade I have left."

"I wish the feeling was mutual." Jr. answered.

"Comrade?" chaos looked down to Jr. "She's a U.R.T.V. as well." chaos hadn't been aware that any other bio-weapons had survived the Miltian Conflict. Albedo's miraculous survival wasn't all that surprising once chaos had actually met him, but he'd never heard of a girl.

"Yeah. Female type unit number 668, Citrine. She's a variant and my sister." Jr. turned his attention back on the woman in front of him. "And what do you mean only comrade? Where's Gaignun?"

Citrine raised an eyebrow at him and shifted her stance to an exasperated one. "You know where he is, Rubedo. According to father you paid him a visit not too long ago. Didn't stay long, however, thanks to Albedo."

Jr. gritted his teeth against the remark. "Jr.? You saw Gaignun?"

"It's--it's not the way she said it. It's nothing like it sounds."

"Nigredo's a handful. I never thought he'd be so disobedient. The way he struggled was outrageous. He almost escaped a couple of times." She grinned at her brother, "Almost."

"You bitch. Tell me where he is!" Jr. shouted, lunging forward slightly. "If you're on guard here then he must be inside."

"And if he is? I won't let you interfere with Father."

Jr. shook his head angrily, "Citrine I don't have time for this! Don't you understand what's going on? How many more people have to die in order for him to fulfill whatever the hell it is that he wants done?"

"You're the one who doesn't understand, Rubedo." Citrine said sharply. "Have you forgotten our duty? Our duty is to destroy U-DO. Nothing else matters as long as we accomplish that."

"I understand enough!" Jr. growled,"He wants me dead, right? Well why can't he do it? Is he afraid of me?"

_You hear that Dad? Come out, coward!_

"A failure who has forgotten his role as a weapon and abandoned his mission has no right to speak to him that way."

Jr. sighed and tried to calm himself down. He didn't want to fight Citrine but he needed to find a way into the doors. He had to think this thing through. Now was the time for sensible actions in place of rash ones.

"Citrine, stop. I don't want to have to fight you. I don't want to lose anyone else. I don't want to lose any more comrades!"

"You abandoned us!" she fired back. Jr. saw a strange flicker of vulnerability in her eyes. "You're no comrade to us."

"Citrine..."

"I forgot to mention. I have another duty." she said, arrogance creeping its way back into her voice. "I have the power to destroy the Red Dragon. Just like Nigredo."

"Just like Ni--what are you talking about?"

"You didn't know?" Citrine asked, making it obvious that she already knew his answer.

"Didn't know what?" Jr. responded.

Citrine smiled gently at her older brother, causing him to glare darkly in response. "Nigredo was created for two purposes. The first was to act as a vessel for our father so that he could transmigrate. The second was to destroy the Red Dragon. He was meant to destroy you, Rubedo."

Jr. stared at her in shock. "You're lying."

"I'm not."

Suddenly everything Albedo ever said made sense. Jr. had thought he was just spouting nonsense. He thought he'd just been saying ridiculous things just to make him upset but he had been trying to warn him all this time. He really had been sleeping with Death. The Dragon and his Slayer. All these years he'd been living with someone who's purpose was to destroy him. Gaignun could've killed him whenever he'd wanted. Jr. had left himself so open, so vulnerable. Gaignun could have quite plainly ripped him apart in his sleep. He could have used Jr.'s own weapons to kill him. He could've but he hadn't...wasn't that proof of something? Anything? Jr. shook his head. He felt like he was going crazy.

"None of that was fake. That was really Gaignun. Gaignun really did...attack me, " he murmured. He raised a hand to his shoulder. Everyone was an enemy.

"Jr., It has to be a trick." MOMO said urgently, "She's just trying to confuse you."

Jr. had thought about that. It seemed possible that Citrine could lie to him, but what purpose would it serve her? She didn't want him to kill Dmitri so it was obvious that she wasn't trying to provoke him. Frazzel him maybe; distract him enough for him to get careless so that this seemingly inevitable fight would end faster. Jr. shook his head again.

"Albedo had been right this whole time. I'm so stupid."

Jr. heard the amusement in Citrine's voice. "We are weapons. Emotions are of no use to us. You're so weak, Rubedo. Don't worry this should only last a few moments."

"No. Citrine, stop this. You don't have to do this. Dad doesn't care about you. He only cares about his goal."

Citrine chuckled. "And? Again, his 'caring' of me does not have anything to do with this mission."

"But I care, Citrine. I don't want to have to kill my own sister. This is outrageous."

Citrine ignored him. He watched the shift in her stance. He knew that shift. Preparation. "It's such a shame Father could not have found another vessel. Nigredo would love to be a part of this. A showdown between the executioners, the dragon, and his ghost. It's a shame one's already been defeated."

Jr.'s head snapped up at that comment. "What?"

Citrine sighed dramatically. "Do not worry, Rubedo. This Killer has already been tested. I'm aware you're much stronger but it was sort of disappointing how quickly Albedo was exterminated."

Jr. started to shake. The all-to familiar feeling of red anger began to build in his chest, spilling into joints and muscles. "You didn't..." he threatened, blue eyes flashing red.

She smiled, arrogant and almost proud "Yes. I killed him."

Jr. lunged at such a speed that chaos barely had time to attempt to grab him. "Jr., wait, stop!" he cried out after him but nothing was going to keep him still.

Citrine had been expecting him to lose control. She timed his speed perfectly and moved to kick his legs out from under him. Jr. had been watching for her to move. He caught her side step and caught her leg. She snickered down at him. She whipped her Eclair rod from its holster and brought it down to connect with the side of his face. It knocked him down and released her leg. Citrine swung again but Jr. had a Makaov ready and shot the weapon out of her grasp. The action frustrated her. She easily dodged the next bullet and forced Jr. down onto his back, pressing an elbow into his neck and knocking away his gun. She held him down with sheer weight as he struggled for the other gun. Blood pounded in his veins angrily, screaming for release. "Think you can defeat me, Rubedo?"

Small tremors manifested along her body as her power awakened. Jr. growled angrily and fought against her hold, his own power threatening to crush him under its strength. A pain in her leg caused Citrine to shift her eyes to the area for a brief second. A narrow arrow had embedded itself deep in the limb, a strange freezing sensation crawled along the bone. Slightly agitated, she shifted her weight to hold Jr. still and rip the offensive object from its place when a motion caught her attention. A strange wave impacted her side, pushing the oxygen from her lungs and toppling her over. She heard urgent whispering and felt another icey pain bury itself in her arm. She pulled the arrows from her quickly and glared at the silver haired boy who was trying to restrain Jr. She heard the resistance of a bow and jerked swiftly to avoid the arrow. Without breaking her motion she pulled a large pistol from its holster under her arm and fired it at the Realian archer. It hit her squarely against her sternum and sent her gasping to the ground. Before the others could move she fired four shots toward the angelic boy. He dodged most of them, only one grazed the side of his neck. He hissed and placed a gloved hand against the wound. While he was distracted she ran for her rod. Picking it up she lunged for MOMO. chaos let go of the crazed redhead in time to place his hands against the ground, unleashing energy through the floor. A strange symbol appeared underneath the U.R.T.V. Surprised and confused she jumped back but not before a sharp yellow sword shoved its way through the middle of the complex symbol and caught her arm. She let out a strangled cry as it pulsated once before slipping back into the symbol and vanishing. She stumbled backwards, a bit dazzed as blood mixed with the white and purple of her uniform. chaos held a shuddering Jr. as MOMO clutched her bleeding chest, the nanomachines in her systems slowly fixing the problem.

"chaos...Leave." Jr. choked.

"Jr..."

"Leave. Take MOMO and leave. I can't hold it back anymore. I don't want to."

He looked up at his savior and sighed. "Every cell in my body is aching for a fight. She won't stop so I can't hold back."

"Jr. I can't leave you by-"

"-yes you can! Now we don't have a lot of time. She's going to get MOMO now. Just...ugh!" A deep shudder ran through Jr., waves like fire evaporating off his skin. He grabbed chaos' arm hard and shoved him near the door. It opened at his prescence. He grabbed MOMO's arm. "I'm sorry," he murmured before tossing her and knocking chaos into the next room. The door shut closed in front of them. He looked to his left and shot the locking mechanism. "Jr.!" MOMO screamed, banging her fists on the door.

"We're even now, Citrine." Jr. hissed as neropinephrine wound its way around his spine. His vision became blurry. "You and me." The constant burning pain that had been in his ribs and in his shoulder vanished under the feeling. He took in a deep breath and turned around. She stood military, the same arrogance in her features as always. Blood drew lines on her arms and leg but she didn't seem to feel it.

"Indeed, Rubedo. It's time you learned some manners." Orange electricity engulfed her, copying the shape of Jr.'s own apparition. The beast roared to life inside him, overpowering his better judgement. The fire behind his eyes flickered a constant and dangerous red, threatening the deep blue of them. His body shook as he took steps toward her. He slipped his gun into his back pocket.

_This is how it feels, Gaignun, when you're not here to stop me._

He let down his resistance, allowing the fire to consume him in a sort of treaty. He felt as if he were being transformed. He'd never succumbed to fury this strong. Subconsciously he shrunk away from what he was becoming.

_And this is where I lose myself, Albedo. Just like you've always wanted._

Citrine watched from her stance, trying to decide the best way of attack. She could break him down now or she could tire him out first. It all depended on how strong this Red Dragon actually was. She tossed the rod in her hand loosely. She could run for him and let the two collide, but that seemed stupid and pointless. His advance was slow and somewhat shaky as if he were struggling with the enormity of it. Plausible. She threw the rod toward the fire. It twisted strangely at impact before bursting into small metallic shards along the walls and floor. Well even if it could twist metal that didn't mean it would necessarily break her. She wanted him to be at full power and in complete control before she used the seal. What good would it do her if she knocked him down any less?

Jr. felt alive. Animalistic. So very alive that he was certain it was power was overwhelming. He felt as if it might rip him apart if he let slip the small hold he had over it. Albedo had been right about him. Depending on machinery had weakened his control. Once all of this was over he was going to have to devote some serious time to training. That is, if unleashing this power wasn't committing suicide. Thought was slipping away as pure rage coursed through him. The waves of fire around him pulsated, beckoning his enemy forward. Sharp, powerful waves erupted from him surroundings, charring the floor and walls into floating ashes that popped on contact. In response, Citrine matched his power with her own. Orange wavelength slammed into red, shaking their surroundings. Jr. staggered a bit but regained his stance and pushed back viciously. Citrine stood calmly; straight as the arrows that had punctured her. Her order contained his wild fire. Jr. tried to abandon the rush he was acquiring from this but gave up in the end. Albedo was dead, Gaignun was dying, he might as well...

The full force of his power was unleashed. It ripped through the complicated locking mechanisms, bending metal and threatening the construction of the Quaratine Hangar's walls. His mind was blank. He embodied pure strength. Citrine smirked at the strange tactic. It was even consuming her own resolve. Her wave was becoming smaller and smaller under the force of Jr.'s. She waited until there was barely a thing film of it over her before she attacked.

Jr. snapped back to awareness as a sharp pain sliced across his chest. Another ran through his mind, ringing first softly then shrilly before quieting down again. He gasped as the same sensation stabbed at him again. The pain caused a break in his wave. Citrine had expected the opening and swiftly sent a powerful wave through it. It cut across perfectly, landing against his stomach and sending him flying backwards into the doors. The waves stopped instantly.

Jr. blinked in surprise, brought back down from his rush. He tried pushed himself up but only made it into a kneeling position. He groaned at the pain ringing in his head and the debilitating burning of old wounds.

"The seal of 666," she answered to his confusion. He looked up at her, breathless. "Still think you can defeat me?"

* * *

"Jr.! Jr.!" MOMO screamed, pounding on the door. "Jr.! chaos, we have to get in there."

chaos stood silent, thinking intently about something the Realian couldn't figure out.

"chaos, come on!" Frustrated and worried she ran to him, pulling on his arm. "chaos!"

"No, MOMO. Just wait. He knows what he's doing." chaos heard something creak and pulled her against the wall and counted. One. Two. Three. The doors flew open. MOMO jumped and chaos held her closer and away from the falling doors as one fell over them, hiding them from view. Finally the noise stopped and the doors were still. Jr. lie on the floor in front of the second set of doors. He was struggling to get up, but he couldn't move. He demanded his joints to move, but couldn't. The clicking of heeled boots sounded through the broken doors. MOMO tried to run to Jr., but chaos held her still.

"Wait for it."

Jr. lie helpless as Citrine made her way over to him. He had to think of something. If he just lied there she would kill him. She'd get away with murdering Albedo and Gaignun would die. His eyes scanned the room for something, anything he could use or manipulate to his advantage but came up with nothing. Citrine sighed when she finally made it over to him.

"I'm disappointed, Rubedo. You lasted longer than Albedo if that makes you feel any better."

Jr. glared up at her angrily. The chemical in his body kicked up again, swirling inside his chest. Citrine noticed this and pulled out her pistol again. She lowered it to him, pointing the barrel between his eyes. Jr. noticed a flicker of something as she moved. A strange distortion on her left hip. The flashing of red lights made it difficult and almost unnoticeable, but when the warning light hit it just right...It took him a few minutes to register. A trap. Albedo had left a trap on her. How could she not have noticed something like that? He tried to think, to force himself to move. If he could reach his guns he could set it off. It didn't look like he was going to be able to. chaos noticed the distortion too and realized Jr. needed a distraction.

chaos whispered as quietly as he could into MOMO's ear. "MOMO, do you still have the arrows that release electricity?"

MOMO nodded. "I have one left."

"Good. I want you to aim for the area right between her shoulder blades. Can you do that?"

MOMO strung her bow and moved from behind the fallen door. She calculated her aim perfectly, pulled back and released it. It hit its mark squarely, sending volt after volt of thunderous electricity through Citrine's body. She bent over, screaming at the feeling. Jr. gathered himself as she stumbled backwards. Without hesitation, Jr. pulled out a Makarov and aimed it toward the distortion. A strange snapping sounded upon impact. Instantly a boiling hot inferno consumed her, entangling itself with the electricity. Another cry emitted from her throat as she twisted against the pain.

"Behind the door!" Jr. shouted, quickly pushing himself up. MOMO ran behind the door, crouching beside chaos. The fire built up again. He shivered roughly at the sensation as he struggled with control. He just needed the right amount. Just enough to finish this but it was over powering him again. Citrine forced herself to raise her pistol one more time just as Jr. released the wave. It consumed her, wrapping her in its fire. The power behind it was too much for her to handle and she fell hard to the ground. He stopped and staggered a bit; exhausted. He waited for a few moments for her to stand back up. She tried. After all of the attacks had stopped she pushed herself up but ultimately fell back down onto her knees, propping herself up with a blood-stained hand. Short whimpers came from her as she tried to force herself up. Jr. walked toward her cautiously, both guns ready if she attempted to move.

"The only person allowed to kill Albedo," Jr. said, through heavy breaths, "Is me."

He raised the his right arm to point the weapon towards her. chaos and MOMO crept out from behind their shield and ran to Jr. but stopped when they saw him. MOMO quieted the urge to call out to him, holding her hand against her chest and biting her bottom lip.

"Tell me Rubedo, why do we exist? How do we exist when our purpose is gone...How do you, how do any of you, survive? What drives you?"

Jr. was quiet for a moment, staring at his sister. He couldn't believe any of this was happening. He was still shocked. He averted his gaze from her hazel eyes. He couldn't do this. He wouldn't.

"I have people to take care of. There are people I have to protect. I exist for the people who need me. They drive me."

Citrine scoffed at the comment. "Heavy luggage. That's all they are. You'll never get anywhere..." her eyes snapped the the pink-haired girl, "Protecting such frail things." She coughed and winced a little. "I pity you."

Jr. nodded, "Yeah." He placed the gun against her forehead. "You should."

He closed his eyes and pulled the trigger.

* * *

"Jr.?" MOMO whispered gently.

"Let the lamp affix its beam." Jr. chuckled darkly. "Albedo, you stupid bastard."

He felt a comforting hand on his back. "Jr."

He looked at her with sad blue eyes. "Hey MOMO. You ok?"

She nodded, he smiled. "Good."

He turned back to the body of his sister. He knew he'd had no other choice but...

"chaos, MOMO, thanks for earlier. I wouldn't have made it without you."

"Of course, Jr. It was MOMO who did most of the work."

"Are...are you ok, Jr.?" she asked, trying to catch his eyes with her's.

"Yeah. I'm good." His eyes traveled from the corpse to the final door. Gaignun was behind that door.

"I'm going." He said suddenly. "I don't want you to follow me."

"What? But Jr." MOMO begged, "You can't just go in there by yourself like this."

chaos nodded. "She's right, Jr. It's too dangerous. Didn't you just say that you wouldn't have made it without us?"

Jr. frowned at the blood on MOMO's clothes. He turned around to chaos. Blood still poured from the small place on his neck the bullet had skimmed across.

"No."

"Jr..." He looked toward the small girl and turned to take her hands in his.

"You can't," she said, her voice breaking.

"Hey, hey, don't do that. It's ok. This is something I have to do by myself. I don't want you to get hurt."

"What if something bad happens? We won't be there to help you!" She wrapped her arms around him. "Please, Jr. Let me go with you."

Jr. hugged her back. "MOMO, I couldn't stand to lose anyone else. If you and chaos are there then I'll hold back. I won't be able to concentrate. If anything happened to you, I'd never forgive myself."

chaos sighed and walked toward the two. "He's got a point I suppose. MOMO, they might need us at the bridge. We should go check up on them."

MOMO sniffled against Jr.'s neck. "Fine." She unwrapped her arms from around him and snatched up one of his hands.

"Promise me you'll come back." Gently she placed her bullet bracelet into his hand, closing his fingers around it. "Promise."

He smiled at the gesture. "Yeah, MOMO. I promise." Jr. looked over to his friend. "Take care of this one. Old man Ziggy will have a heart attack when he sees this blood. Tell him it was my fault."

chaos' own smile was worried, but he simply sighed. "I will so make sure you survive for the beating."

* * *

A/N: Well I'm done now. Sorry it's so long and it's probably not the greatest either. --; The next update might be a while since I have a new "Job" babysitting from 7 to 5 and the girls are so crazy I clonk out when I get home. XD That and I can't stay up til 5 just writing anymore. ((sobs)) Oh well. Sorry if this was a bad one. You know who to complain to. Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. :)


	35. Father

A/N: This scene I'm about to recreate is one of my favorites. Dmitri is freakin' awesome, even if he is totally evil. *sigh* Why are Xenosaga's villains so cool? I've never loved villains so much in my life. XD I'm so sorry about the wait, but my internet's been messing up and actually I've been extremely sick all week b/c of this annoying medical condition. --; But see, on when I do get sick I usually just write. I mean, what else do I have to do? XD Well that's what I did but when I was about to update it I realized how stupid it was and so I erased it all and started all over again. I'm sorry if I caused any aneurysms and I'm especially apologetic to **CE412 **b/c my late updates stress you. XD

Hug? XD *attempted hug* Also:

I. Miss. Gaignun.  
'nuff said. XD

Team Albedo:  
From celebrations to epic eulogies of win you have been there to pick at Gaignun flaws and accentuate Albedo's...which incidentally make him greater. XD While I'm sure you know the "truth" I'm also certain that Team Gaignun knows it to be false and even though I'd already decided who I wanted Jr. with...I think you'll like this chapter. CX

P.S. Albedo's Jerusalem has decided that he has your flag. XD Idk why we need flags now when we're so close to the end, but alright. XD

Team Gaignun:  
Yeah uh...I think you'll like this chapter too. XD *hides*

P.S. I took Team Gaignun's flag b/c Ganon-sama is Team Gaignun and since her spork thinks it's Batman, well...we just didn't have the heart to break it to him. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 35  
Father

Jr. stared at the door intently, trying to prepare himself for this. 'I can do this,' he thought carefully. 'Goin' in alone, comin' back with Gaignun.' He took a deep breath. 'Not losing anymore comrades.'

"Time to blow the place to hell."

Jr. pressed the button on the locking mechanism and it released the doors into the darkness of the Quarantine Hangar. He cringed as he stepped over the body of his sister. Just as he was about to make his way through the doors the red warning lights flashed brighter and a large alarm rang through the halls. "That bastard, he's trying to activate the emulators."

Without hesitation Jr. took off, running towards his father.

* * *

Dmitri's hands flew over the console, or would it be more appropriate to say Nigredo's? He smiled to himself. A few casualties, but nothing he couldn't live with. As long as he could release the emulators then it didn't matter. He would admit that he had been surprised at Citrine's disposal. He hadn't known that such failures would fight so hard and actually accomplish something. A small probability, nothing to worry about. He had become concerned, however, with the way Nigredo suddenly seemed to spring to life, squirming around and pushing against his cage. _What is it? _The doctor asked, mildly curious and overly alert towards his son's awakening. The answer he received both surprised and relaxed him.

_Oh, I see. You're sad. You had a connetion with that unit, _he sent, eyes ever watchful over the flow of keys. _But that's all an illusion. You're weapons. You see, you're nothing more than one of my parts. You don't need any meaningless emotions. Anything more is completely unnecessary._

And what was this? _Nigredo, you've finally come to acknowledge my work after all of this time. I had a feeling you'd submit. It only took you a little bit longer than I had expected. I am rather excited, to say the least. Everything runs so much smoother when you have an accepting body, don't you agree?_

Dmitri's fingers scanned over the last three letters of code and to his delight a small hissing sound leaked its way from the zohars' confinement. Another string of code and the locks would be completely released.

"You filthy bastard! Stop what you're doing right now!"

Strangely delighted at the voice, he turned around to see his son running along the long, narrow platform toward him. "Is that you, Rubedo? It's been a long time, hasn't it? I must say, I've missed you."

Rubedo snarled at him from atop the steps. Dmitri sounded absolutely giddy, his movements were way too energetic. He was so close to achieving exactly what he'd been reaching towards this whole time. The whole idea of Dmitri being the slightest bit happy pissed Jr. off beyond reason.

"Listen, I don't know what you're planning to do and frankly I couldn't give a damn. Give back Gaignun's body and get the hell out of here!"

Dmitri closed his eyes and laughed, thoroughly enjoying the way this scenario was playing out. "Oh, I'm so disappointed in you, Rubedo," he said, "This circumstance is your fault entirely. There's no one else to blame but yourself and I'm afraid I've been forced to take matters into my own hands. Since those incomplete units failed their mission fifteen years ago."

"My fault? Oh yeah?" Jr. seethed. He noticed Dmitri reaching for the zohar control console and pulled a Makarov from his pocket. The action amused Dmitri.

"Have you forgotten that your precious 'Gaignun' is in here?" Dmitri asked, placing a hand on his chest. "Shoot me and say sayonara to your darling brother."

"I haven't forgotten, bastard. I don't care who's in there I'll still shoot you."

"You'd kill Nigredo? Well, actually that doesn't seem so surprising. Quite natural, in fact. He was created to destroy you. Survival of the fittest."

"Shut up!"

Dmitri shrugged, ignoring Jr. "Then again, he was never supposed to see battle. Too valuable. And while I had designed him specifically to be the one to execute any and all units that returned from Miltia, I was very surprised when he killed me instead. I never thought he'd be so rebellious. I mishandled the situation I'm afraid. I'll be very careful next time." Dmitri ran his hand along the rim of the console, teasingly close to the buttons. "Nigredo is perfection. With his ability to turn your own waves against you, I'm virtually indestructible. Creating you 'children' was a dilemma. I thought I'd invented myself into a corner because you see, I'm infected also."

Jr.'s eyes widened at that. "Yes, that's right, Rubedo. You could've have destroyed me years ago. Complete and utter destruction as that would have been the loss of metemphysicos, my ability to transmigrate. That is where the need for Nigredo came. Not even the Red Dragon can best him; best me."

"Let. Him. Go." Jr. threatened, cocking the pistol.

"Now, now, Rubedo. There's no reason to get upset. Nigredo's fine and has decided to be more obedient from now on. There's no reason to kill him now although I never planned to. It's wonderful the way a father and his son can come to terms. There's no need for you to be afraid for him any longer."

Jr. stood silent, a deep frown on his features. He couldn't help picturing Gaignun in place of Dmitri. That look on his face when he dared for him to pull the trigger. The old wounds had already begun to heal but they burned to life again at the memory. The gun twitched in his hand.

"Gaignun." he finally managed, trying to keep his voice level. "Gaignun, are you in there? Can you hear me?"

"He can't hear you Rubedo," he drawled, "He's buried deep inside my conscious. You'll never get through to him."

"I'm not talking to you!" Jr. snapped, "Gaignun! It's me, Jr.! If you can hear me, you've got to let me know. I--I don't want to kill you."

The gun trembled harder. Dmitri noticed this and decided to play on the matter. He tried to remember exactly why he had given his creations emotions but no matter how perfectly he could have made them, their emotions weren't programmed and Rubedo's power even stemmed from emotions. No matter. Dmitri saw opportunity and he wasn't about to pass it up.

"Gaignun!" Jr. called again, almost desperate. "Answer me, please."

"Jr." he said, eyes averting to the ground. In one smooth motion, he adopted Gaignun's stance and mannerism, trying to appear sorrowful. The small drop of Jr.'s arm let him know it was working.

"Gaignun?" Jr. asked warily, completely distrusting of Dmitri. When the man looked up at him, there was a strange light in his eyes and Jr. tried to decide if Dmitri could even fake something like that.

"Jr., I'm sorry. I couldn't stop myself." Dmitri turned his eyes up to meet Jr.'s, "I always knew this would happen. I'm so stupid for putting you in danger. Just end it now, don't worry for me."

Jr. shook his head frantically. "No, shut up. This is a trap."

"No, Jr. it's me!" he answered. He tried to walk towards him, but didn't make it. He grabbed his temples and trembled.

"I can't escape, Jr.! This is as far as I can get to you. I'm in here and I'm not getting out! You have to stop me!" Tremors seized his body and he placed his left hand up to his forehead, stumbling onto the console. "Hurry, before he comes back!"

Jr. saw Gaignun's hand reach for the console again and without thinking he aimed and fired. The bullet shot through the palm of Gaignun's hand, tearing through his numbers. He cried out and grabbed at it.

"Gaignun..." Jr. whispered, upset with himself over what he had just done. "I'm sorry but I can't let you touch it."

He shook his head, dismissing the action and clutching his hand. "Jr. do it now. Kill me."

"No! I could never--" Jr. screamed.

"There's no other way, do it!"

"No!"

"He'll kill you, Jr.! I'll kill you! I don't ever want to hurt you like that again."

Jr. bit his lip, unsure of what to do. He couldn't just let him live. He was Dmitri now. There was no part of him that even hinted of Gaignun, except for this. The way he looked at him, the way his eyes pleaded. The sincerity in his voice, even if it wasn't his own. "Gaignun..."

"Do it!" He hissed, gripping his bleeding hand. Jr. stared at the blood dripping onto the floor and knew he couldn't do it. Angrily he threw his weapon to the floor.

"Jr.!"

"I can't and I won't, Gaignun! Look, I know what you are, ok? I know and I don't care! I don't care now and I'll never care because...because I love you. Goddammit I do and nothing is ever going to change that!"

"Jr...I love you too," the blonde man said, "And I'm sorry for everything I've ever done to you."

"Gaignun..."

"And I'm sorry," He said, deftly reaching a left hand into his back pocket. "That you're so gullible."

Three quick shots sprang toward him before Jr. had time to think. He jerked away as reflex. One missed, but the other two landed. One against his chest, the other his hip. It burned through his clothes, leaving large cauterized burns on his skin, threatening to produce blood. Quickly he grabbed his discarded gun and aimed it toward Dmitri. Jr. knelt at the top of the steps, one hand against his chest and the other on his gun.

"Damn you." Jr. hissed through pain.

Dmitri chuckled, "That was too easy, Rubedo. I don't remember teaching you to react to so stupidly. I suppose I didn't teach you well enough. Never the matter, Nigredo learned well. In the end that's all I need."

Jr. winced against pain and tried to focus. How could he possibly manage to separate the two of them? He had to figure out something fast, he couldn't just let Dmitri take the emulators, but he couldn't shoot him again. He didn't want to damage Gaignun's body any more than he had to and Gaignun was so frail. Almost human in his mortality. He couldn't spend entire rounds firing at him. His mind raced, trying every invisible angle he could think of but nothing worked. In the end either he or Gaignun was dead and as much as he'd be happy to give up his slot in the universe for Gaignun he was Dmitri and Dmirti was dangerous.

"It appears you can't trust anyone anymore, Rubedo. Your precious ship fell so easily, we should start adding inanimate objects to the list of treason against you."

"You're right. Everyone's an enemy. Even Gaignun, but that's fine. I don't mind sleeping with the enemy. In fact, I think it's kinda fun." Jr. chuckled darkly, "Hear that Gaignun? That's something I'd get into 'trouble' for saying, right? Because I'm porcelain and you don't lay porcelain in a bed of rocks."

Dmitri shook his head in mock pity, "Rubedo, I think you've become delusional. You and Albedo are my greatest failures."

That time Jr. really did laugh. "Really? I can understand thinking I am. I mean, I did take out my brothers and ruin your plan for world domination or what the fuck ever but Albedo? You...you and Albedo are just alike. Call him whatever you want, but it's true. A chip off the old block."

That seemed to frustrate Dmitri a little. "Explain yourself."

"Albedo's entire life has revolved around a fear. The fear of losing me and Gaignun too, he just won't admit it. You, oh you're even worse. You went to some absolutely ridiculous lengths there, Dad. How long have you been using bodies to jump around? And for what? To kill U-DO, right?" Jr. shook his head. "Albedo might be a failure to you, but he made it. What the hell makes you think you'll be successful?"

Dmitri smiled, "In ancient times people lived together with God. They loved God, revered, and even feared God. Out of fear of the undying god, they sought divine power. This was a way for the ancients to resist him. Eventually, they found a method to become gods themselves. The revival of their relics is still incomplete, but it won't take long I can assure you. You see, U-DO is a god of this dimension. If in fact U-DO can not be destroyed, then we shall be the ones to become God ourselves."

"You're a fucking lunatic. Another thing you and Albedo have in common."

Dmitri smirked. "Is that so, Rubedo?"

"U-DO will destroy you. He'll fucking rip you apart. You can't fight God and you can't buy your way there." Jr. shifted, watching every move Dmitri made and desperately hoping to find Gaignun in there somewhere. "You'll never become a god. His very existence is proof of what you're not."

Dmitri was silent, as was Jr. and for a few moments neither of them moved. Each one was waiting for something, anything out of the other. A small motion, a sign of weakness.

"Gaignun, I know you're in there." Jr. choked, "And if you don't answer me soon, I swear to God or U-DO or whoever, that I'll kick your ass the minute I get you home."

Dmitri didn't say a word, but realized quickly where this was going and was prepared when all of a sudden Jr. unleashed the full force of his power from a seemingly dormant area. The zohars rang in pitch at the presence as the waves converged toward Dmitri. He absorbed them, taking every tendril or stray wave in and without even moving, sent them back. The emulators screamed louder as they crossed again. The waves dove into Jr., crawling through his skin and into his system, mixing with the chemical inside. The two clashed, clawing at each other viciously and threatening to tear him apart. He let out a painful cry and dropped his gun, wrapping arms around himself in order to keep everything together. He trembled and convulsed until an extremely sharp explosion triggered in his chest, searing the wound on his on skin. He fell onto his back, writhing on the long platform. He heard footsteps and the clicking of keys. Locks released, allowing the already stirred zohars to awaken fully from stasis, each one humming a different pitch.

"Behold this glorious picture." he heard his father exclaim, "My revenge will begin. Our time of victory against His terror has finally come."

Small tremors shook through Jr.'s joints. With Citrine, she had simply cut through his wave, but Dmitri had reflected and magnified it. He was actually surprised to find himself still alive, but it was worth it. He felt a small tugging on his link. It was so small that if he hadn't been wishing so desperately for it to be there then he wouldn't easily missed it.

_That woke you up, huh? I'd hoped it would. Where you been, sleepy-head?_

A gunshot fired. By the sound of the impact, Jr. assumed it was the console. Precaution. He could hear Dmitri's footsteps on the stairs. One at a time. Why not? He had all the time in the world now.

_I've been calling for you forever, you know? You see what happens when you don't listen to me?_

Dmitri was standing over him now. He kicked Jr.'s boot to see if he'd get a response out of the boy. When Jr. moved he knew his job wasn't finished. No matter. He pointed his gun towards his most troublesome son.

_Gaignun, you idiot._

"Another rash decision, Rubedo." Dmitri said, but Jr. wasn't paying attention to him anymore.

_I'm so glad you're ok. You really had me scared. Oh no, don't worry about me. I'm ok. I'm always ok. _

"Farewell, Rubedo." Dmitri snickered, "Remember your great father."

_What is it, Gaignun? Where? _

Dmitri was about to pull the trigger when he noticed Jr.'s eyes weren't on him. They were on something else, almost as if he were looking through him. The longer he stared, the wider his eyes grew. Disbelief showed on the smile he wore as he spoke:

"You know, the thing about my death, Dad...See, I made a deal with someone. And that deal was that I wouldn't die without his permission. And I don't think I have it yet."

Jr. almost choked on the next sentence. "Isn't that right, Albedo?"

"Why Rubedo." A smooth voice cooed. "I would never grant such permission."

Dmitri froze as he felt a presence against his back. He quickly turned his head to see a white figure behind him. It stood with its back flat against his, just waiting. He started to completely turn but was not fast enough. The figure grabbed his shoulders from behind and threw him down the stairs. Dmitri slammed flat on his back hard, hearing a few snaps sound as result. Before he could even utter a cry Albedo was on him, holding him down.

"Failure, Father? Now that's a tad harsh. Nigredo, make sure to hold him down nice and tight for me."

"He can't hear you!" Dmitri growled, he started to pull the trigger on the laser gun in his hand but his fingers wouldn't move. He tried to struggle against Albedo but couldn't. "What?"

"Really. He sure seems to be hearing me."

Jr. slowly pushed himself to his feet. "Albedo!" he shouted happily. He gathered the rest of his strenght and staggered his way down the stairs to him.

"Rubedo!" Albedo yelled, "Form the link!"

Jr. stopped, "What? Now? Why? You can't!"

The ring of the emulators began to dull, catching Jr.'s attention. He glanced over quickly to see the containment units closing around them again, despite the fact that the controls were smashed. He shook his head and continued his way to Albedo.

"We don't have time, Rubedo! You have to form the link now while Nigredo is aware. He is contaminated by U-DO. We have the power to neutralize him. Did you forget?"

"We can't do that! If we do that we'll--"

Albedo shifted turned his head away from his disoriented father to his brother. "Rubedo, after my death I achieved great power. I'll pull Dmitri into my own body and leave Nigredo here for you. I'll take a nice little trip with our dear old father. I'll send us into another dimension. Oh, won't that just be delightful!"

Dmitri scowled at him to which Albedo responded with a sadistic smile. Jr. shook his head. "No, what if something happens? I can't be responsible for Gaignun's death!"

"Rubedo, we don't have time to discuss this. This is what is going to happen. Pull yourself together, you're the leader."

Albedo turned back to Dmitri. "Nigredo, the moment you feel him slip away I want you to abandon the link. Abandon it immediately or I'll pull you along with me. And we wouldn't want that would we?"

"Albedo...are you going to leave me again?"

Albedo smiled softly at his brother. "Rubedo, time is of the essence. We can't wait any longer. Time is precious only to you and Nigredo. If you don't hurry up and do it we'll lose this opprotunity. Do it now, Rubedo!"

Jr. took one look at him and nodded. "Alright." He moved to stand facing Albedo's left side. With heavy breath and aching body he shouted, "Albedo...Gaignun...Opening spritual link."

* * *

A/N: Omg! DDDX You didn't tell me Albedo would come back! --; Calm down Albedists. I told you I wasn't prejudice. ;)

I finally got done! I hope that didn't suck. --; I thought I'd never get time to finish and since I was so far behind, the minute I got home I shut myself in here to ignore the world and update. XD So I hope it doesn't seem rushed. :/ I hope you like it. CX


	36. Terms

A/N: Now here we go. I updated on time! XD Yay! Thought that'd never happen, huh? Right well I really don't know what to rant about here, so I guess we'll go ahead with it.

This is by no means the end. --; So those of you who are freaking out, calm down. XD We've still got a couple of chapters.

Thank you all of my reviewers. CX You push this story along and inspire me to write for you.

I do not own Xenosaga. *sigh* I never will either ;.;

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 36  
Terms

Energy coursed through his veins painfully, almost causing him to drop his arms. He fought past it and focused on the formation of the link. An invisible mass materialized and he slammed his palms against it. It took shape immediately, surrounding Albedo and Dmitri inside of the circle. Albedo raised his palm to it from the inside, gripping it harshly. Jr. struggled against the constant pulse awakening every slight injury and magnifying it. He focused harder, blocking out pain and emotion. He became the weapon his father designed him to be. Funny how he was using it to kill him. "Good, Mon Précieux. Just like that." Albedo encouraged slightly. He grinned wickedly at Dmitri.

"My children..." the defiant scientist spat, fighting against the weight that was subduing him. "It warms my heart to see you gathered and plotting against me."

"Oh, but my dear father. I didn't know you had one. Stealing Nigredo's doesn't count I'm afraid."

"You kill me, you kill yourselves. Nigredo's not going anywhere. Your foolish attempt will break Rubedo and then where will that leave you?"

Albedo laughed at that comment. "Deception is the way of the snake. It hisses hypnotic seduction as it suffocates its prey. Such a delicious way to live and even now Death is dying of poison constriction. Carrion is his ghost and I'm afraid that since the executioner himself is forbidden to die..." He shoved his arm forcefully into the body under him, causing the doctor to convulse sharply and cry out. He felt an abnormal jump in the link as Jr. shouted against such an action to Gaignun's body. Albedo rolled his eyes. What did Jr. expect of him? Asking the doctor nicely wasn't going to get the job done. "Death himself has become white."

Albedo frowned in his search. Dmitri had indeed been very strong and it was hard to tell where his conscious ended and Gaignun's began. He didn't have too much time to find him either if Jr.'s shudders were any indication of the pain this was causing him. He searched harder but it seemed that every time he'd grab a corner of what he labeled Dmitri it would wind itself around the so "sacred" territory of Gaignun.

_Hold still_. Albedo growled, shifting around angrily. The man continued to fight him. He gritted his teeth and pressed harder. _Nigredo, unless you wish to die with the villain then I suggest you assist me._

His work suddenly became easier then as Gaignun fought his clinging father viciously, but still it accomplished nothing. It was as if Dmitri had been glued to him and Albedo was the ineffective solvent. _Ineffective Nigredo? Let us hope that father hasn't become one with you or else my poor Rubedo's heart will shatter beyond repair._

But he was right. This technique was getting him nowhere. He had been hoping this would happen a lot faster. The longer Gaignun's body lie open to the link the more severe the amount of damage. With a dramatic sigh-he really hadn't wanted to waste so much time here-he dove further into him. Dmitri shook and another jump in values warned Albedo that Jr. didn't approve but the former didn't care. He pressed on until he found a corner and pulled forcefully on it. The scientist pulled against his grip, but didn't get very far. Albedo finally gave up and decided that he would have to actually delve into Gaignun's mind. This process was moving too slow. Disgusted at such an idea but finding no other solution he forced his way in.

* * *

"Nigredo." Albedo hissed angrily upon his entrance. "Where are you?"

He stomped through the confines. It was so very infuriating that Rubedo insisted on Nigredo's being alive. He was so so picky. "Nigredo." He sighed again, "Soon I will give up on this attempt to find you."

As earlier the moment Albedo threatened to stop in his aid, Gaignun called out to him. Albedo was glad that he was at least making an effort to make things simpler for him. He followed the voice until he found him. He almost laughed at the sight. Dmitri held Gaignun by the wrist, threatening him dangerously. What Albedo found so amusing was the fact that Gaignun had somehow reverted to his child form. The scared little boy he remembered so long ago. Gaignun whimpered in weak anger and pulled at his father, trying to get away. Albedo shook his head.

"That eager to please our demented maker, Nigredo?"

Their heads shot up at his voice and Dmitri's hold tightened. "I will kill him."

Albedo crossed his arms at the information and stared bored at the doctor. "You seem to think that I would care."

The doctor's features screamed angry confusion as he jerked the boy again. "You want him alive."

"I don't." Albedo said, pointing to himself. "Rubedo does. Personally, I hate both of them. It is by our mutual hatred of you that I find myself here."

Nigredo looked toward him questioningly. "Madness draws a man to do things he'd otherwise not. I hate BOTH of you."

Dmitri knocked the boy beside him down and onto his back. He placed a foot on his chest and pressed down hard. Albedo continued to stand where he was, eternally bored. "If you hate them why are you helping them?"

"Promises are promises. More importantly why do you care? Come, father. Spend time with your failure. Maybe together we can fix my flaws."

Albedo outstretched his hand almost invitingly, a smirk along his features. The professor shook his head angrily. "If I go, he goes." He shoved his foot into Gaignun harder and pulled a gun from his pocket.

"Ah, desperation." Albedo sighed, his hand balling into a fist. "It's such a glorious thing." With a sharp twist of his wrist the scientist collapsed to the floor, his eyes wide and his breathing heavy. "And coming from you, dear loving father." Albedo continued, making his way over to the fallen man. "It is artistry rivaling that of Michealangelo and his beautiful chapel."

"How are you...?"

"This power is not yours," Albedo continued, nonchalant. "You're simply being seduced by that power as I once was."

Albedo bent down, gripping the professor by the collar of his uniform and pulling him up. "You are wasting our time. We have an engagement with Oblivion. Consider yourself lucky as such a mistress is not usually so patient."

Dmitri struggled frantically one last time, raising his gun to him. Albedo knocked his hand away, slightly amused. He could break him so easily, but doing that wouldn't accomplish anything. He had to seperate the two.

He jerked the weak man along with him and looked down at his brother. "Executioner..."

"...Albedo."

"I hate you."

Gaignun's eyes hit the floor. "Thank you."

"Make it worth my time."

* * *

Albedo's eyes snapped open and he was back in the ring, crouching over Gaignun's body. Jr.'s shudders were becoming harder and he shook painfully from every pulse. Albedo was thankful he was almost done. He waited until the color of Gaignun's hair darkened and he opened veridian eyes before he began to retract his arm.

"Now let go, Nigredo. If you don't hurry I'll send you away with us."

He was almost free. His arm was visible to the wrist when Gaignun pulled it back down. Surprised, Albedo pulled back harder only causing another reverse action from his brother. "What are you doing, Nigredo?" he hissed, trying to jerk his way out.

"Don't hide your true feelings, Albedo."

"Nigredo." Albedo said, still shocked. He tugged uselessly at his arm.

"We both know that..." Gaignun gripped Albedo's arm, holding him in place. "You were never a good liar."

Jr. saw movement out of the body on the floor. He couldn't convince himself to look away. "Gaignun!" he shouted, trying to keep his hold on the link.

Gaignun ignored him and stared determined at Albedo. "I demand that you let go of my body!" he snarled.

"Gaignun! What are you doing?!" Jr. yelled, desperate now. He could tell something was wrong.

"Why did you come back here?" Gaignun asked, holding onto him harder. Albedo didn't answer, just continued to pull fruitlessly.

"Gaignun!" Jr. cried out again.

"Don't, Jr. Don't stop the link. It's alright."

Jr. frowned but nodded, surprised at how calming the sound of his voice was.

"Nigredo, release me!" Albedo shouted. He yanked again and again against the strength of him. "Why are you doing this? Rubedo needs you!"

Gaignun chuckled sadly at that, " 'Executioner'."

"Rubedo!" Albedo screamed. He could still do it. He didn't have to separate himself completely from Gaignun. He had Dmitri and that's all he needed. "Sever the link! Now!"

"No, Jr.!"

"Do it!"

"Don't!"

"Why are you doing this?" Albedo shouted again. "I order you to relinquish my arm. Now!"

"Sorry, Albedo. I don't like to follow orders." Gaignun smirked. His eyes locked with Albedo's, a sharp and disturbing sadness in them. "Go back to Rubedo."

Albedo's own eyes went wide and he struggled to get away. "Stop this! Nigredo!"

Thunderous strength hit him as if from nowhere and he was knocked from his body straight through the circle of energy and into Jr.'s. The force of the impact knocked the boy away from his position and flung him backwards towards the stairs.

"Nigredo!" he called out before slamming against the floor. His vision went white at the painful impact but he didn't care. He pushed himself up in a desperate attempt to make it back to his brother. He felt Albedo with him as he moved. The younger twin absolutely shocked into speechless immobility. Gaignun winced painfully from the exertion but turned his head to watch Jr. He smiled at him, trying to force the tremble in his lips to stay still. "Nigredo!" Jr. whimpered, forsaking his alias again.

"Rubedo," Gaignun responded weakly, "That is your true form. It was the way you were always meant to be." Jr. forced himself to stand through the pain. "You see, I was created to observe the two of you. The only reason why I existed was to kill you. I tried to abandon that duty but that would have meant I was denying my own existence."

Jr. forced himself to run, making it back to the link and attempting to touch his palms against the circle. "And I have been denying it for a long time. I don't think falling in love with you was part of my natural design."

A thick, sharp, invisible wall rose to block Jr.'s hands. He panicked and pounded on it. "Nigredo!"

"No," he cringed, "Perhaps it was. The age-old cliché of seduction to tempt you into trusting me."

Jr. slammed against it, pulled a gun from his pocket and fired useless rounds of ammunition against it. Albedo was silent, drinking in everything his most hated person was saying. "Albedo knew from the beginning that I was nothing more than a danger to you. I know that I never should have existed in this world to begin with."

That earned a response from Jr. as he cried out, devastated, "That's not true! That's not true!"

He pressed himself against the wall, begging Gaignun's attention. "We were friends, remember? We're brothers! Lovers, Nigredo! I love you! You can't do this!"

"I don't want to exist," Gaignun sighed, closing his eyes. "If it means destroying you."

"You couldn't if you tried, Nigredo! Nigredo!"

Gaignun opened his eyes to the image of Jr. struggling against his barrier. A small tear rolled down his cheek, surprising himself and his older brother. He blinked and closed his eyes.

"Sometimes 'Goodbye' is 'See you later' in disguise." His breathing shallowed and he turned away from his brothers. "How does that sound, Rubedo?"

Jr. pounded viciously against it. "Nigredo!"

Albedo snapped out of the strange trance he was in in time to send urgently to Jr.:

_You can still stop this, Rubedo. Cut the link. Cut it immediately. Do it now!_

Without thinking or anymore encouragement Jr. collapsed the entire structure. Albedo's body disappeared, taking a trapped Dmitri with it. Gaignun's remained still and motionless, even as the circle of blue vanished wtih his father. Jr. ran to him and dropped to his knees in front of him. "Nigredo," he whimpered. "Nigredo."

He pushed against the body but nothing happened. He broke down, tears streaming his face. "Nigredo! Nigredo!" He pulled his head into his lap. "Nigredo. Open your eyes. Open your eyes." He said sternly, as if scolding him.

He felt a hand on his shoulder. "Come on. Come on. Please. Please. Don't do this. Nigredo, wake up. Wake up you bastard!"

_Rubedo..._

Jr. got up from his position, ignoring Albedo and running to the other side of Gaignun. Desperately he tried to lift him. He whimpered and strained against the weight. It wasn't the weight itself that was giving him a hard time. The fact that Gaignun was so tall and he himself so short was what was causing him to struggle. He had to get him out of there though. He had to get him to a hospital or to someone who could help. Jr. tried again to lift him only to have to place him back down.

"Albedo." he cried out painfully. The apparition was there the moment he was summoned, crouching beside his twin. "Albedo, please. Please help me."

Albedo didn't say anything. He simply nodded. He bent down, sliding his arms underneath Gaignun and stood up, holding him delicately.

"Rubedo, you have to lead me. We are...one now."

Jr. stared strangely at him. "How...?"

"Does that matter, Rubedo?"

Jr. shook his head. "We have to get him to the bridge. I'm not sure if the infirmary here is still functional or not and since chaos and MOMO were already on their way there I'm sure it's the safest place on the ship right now. She can at least try to help..."

Albedo nodded. "Albedo...will he be ok?"

Albedo looked down in his wavering arms. "Rubedo...we must go."

Jr. looked up at him, tears still spilling over and sliding down his young face. Albedo smiled comfortingly at him, trying to make him calm down. Thinking straight was what Gaignun needed. Jr. agreed, nodding. Without another word, Jr. and Albedo made their way to the bridge.

* * *

A/N: **CE412**, I know you're not happy with this. XD As you don't like Albedo being in Jr.'s body at the end of X3, but unfortunately I liked it and already had this planned. So forgive me for going against your wishes.

**Albedo's Jerusalem**, you liked the idea and I think you're going to squeal over it.

**The Original Oxymoron**, I don't know how you're going to react...but Albedo's still alive! *points*

**Ganon XD**and the rest of Team Gaignun...I hope you don't murder me. Same goes for Team Albedo. --; Why did I ever start teams? XD

Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people! C:


	37. Wake Up

A/N: Hello Everyone. C: Remember those days when I used to update every freakin' day? XD Well I'm not saying it's starting again but look what I accomplished! :0

I'm very pleasantly surprised with the way the last chapter was recieved. I hope this one doesn't cause my death though. --; Oh the Gaignunists.

Oh right. As you know we are getting close to the end of this and I just want to thank all of my reviewers again. CX I love you guys so much that I wanted the very very last chapter of this story to be a reviewer's tribute and after a really really long time of figuring what I was going to do I decided on one. Then I couldn't decide if I was going to through with it. XD So after deciding 10 chapters ago (wow this story's long) and finally asking Ganon XD what she thought about it I have decided

I am giving you guys a chance to ask any 10 questions of any character you want and have them answer them in the last chapter. And when I say any character that's any dead or alive. XD As long as they were mentioned in here. Any question too, no matter how ridiculous. XD Let's just not get too mean *cough* Gaignunists *cough*  
You don't have to, just thought it might be fun. XD Limit is ten though, so make'em count. ;)

The reason I told you so early was to give you time to consider it. CX Once you've decided PM me the questions. Ganon's already thought of some outrageous ones. --;

Blah, blah let's get on with the...oh no! Wait before I forget! (b/c I keep forgetting --;)  
**The Original Oxymoron**has developed an ingenious Xenosaga community called godsibb(dot)net. Everyone here should check it out as it is freakin sweet! XD

And speaking of characters, you can send legit fanmail to the actual URTVs (not mine the actual ones. XD) on this site and have them respond. I keep meaning to do that but can't think of anything good enough to ask. XD

Right, now on with the story!

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 37  
Wake Up

"His eyes...his eyes won't open."

"But you can feel him, Rubedo. You can feel him just as I can."

"Albedo..."

Jr. stared at the hospital bed Gaignun lie in. This was different. This was so very different. The doctors themselves had been unsure of his brother's recovery. There had been so much neural damage... Jr. squirmed worriedly, terrified. He pushed himself up from the couch placed against the wall for visitors and stood next to the bed. He grasped Gaignun's hand softly, running his thumb over the skin. He let out a shakey sigh.

"Hey Gaignun. Hey, it's...it's time to wake up now. You're really scaring the hell out of me. Three weeks is long enough don't you think? I think it is." He sniffled and placed his forehead against his brother's hand. So far he had been able to stay calm. Gaignun had been in the hospital before, they both had so it wasn't as if such a place was scary or unfamiliar. The amount of time his brother had been under and the fact that this couldn't be cured with a simple nanosurgery was driving Jr. crazy. As if that wasn't enough, the connection between them was weak and that above anything else had Jr. panicking. "I think it is..."

"Rubedo," Albedo cooed softly, he placed a ghostly hand on his shoulder. "Nigredo once said to me that it would be alright to cry. I do not think that he would think less of you if you did so."

Jr.'s hand tightened on Gaignun's. "This is a test huh? You're trying to make me cry. Well it's not going to work, Gaignun. It's not."

"Rubedo..." Albedo said, pulling gently on his shoulder. "Let us go sit down for a moment."

Jr. nodded, his throat clenching in a desperate attempt to keep his tears from surfacing. He flopped down onto the small couch, lying to stretch out across it. Albedo followed him, lifting the boy's head to place it in his lap.

"This couch looks big compared to you, Rubedo." Albedo chuckled, running a hand through his hair. Jr. sighed at the feeling and scanned his eyes across the tiled floor, tracing the leg of the hospital bed to where Gaignun was. "We've spent a lot of time in hospitals," he said, "And for once it's not your fault."

He chuckled and rolled over onto his back to stare up at his brother. "Or not exactly anyway."

Albedo didn't respond, only continued to run fingers though Jr.'s hair. "Can anyone see you, Albedo?" he asked suddenly. "Can anyone see you but me?"

Albedo shook his head. "I believe that only you and Nigredo can see me."

Jr. sighed. "I'm running out of questions to ask you. Gaignun really needs to wake up."

"Rose, rose, rose, red, will I ever see thee wed?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I wonder what he'll do when he wakes up. Will he remember you?"

The gravity and seriousness in Albedo's tone bothered him. Jr. shot up from his seat to stare angrily at him. "I don't have time for your bullshit. Are you trying to make me even more depressed? Why the hell are you still out here anyway? Why are you pretending we're not one person? Finally realize that you never really wanted me to begin with?"

Jr. was surprised when he was suddenly slammed onto his back, Albedo crawling on top of him. The look in his eyes made him shudder. He knew that look.

"Yes you do, Rubedo," Albedo whispered against his neck. "You know it so very, very well."

"Heh, what are you gonna do," Jr. asked, defiant as always, "We're the same person, idiot."

"I am more than just some figment of your imagination, Rubedo. I am reality. I can take you anytime I wish. And I can make sure that you feel every part of it. Every part."

Jr. frowned. "Great, Gaignun's trapped me here for you. Why didn't he just tie a pretty bow around my neck for you? What the hell was he thinking?"

He felt Albedo smile but instead of placing his lips against Jr.'s neck, he pulled back. "He was thinking that I wouldn't do that." Albedo said plainly, offering a hand to help Jr. up from his position. Confused but thankful that Albedo hadn't went through with his threat, he took the hand and allowed him to pull him up.

"And you won't?"

Albedo shook his head, "Not unless you want me to, dear Rubedo," he said, a sparkle of amusement in his eyes.

"Huh..." Jr. said, thinking. "So then it's true, what you told dad, you don't love me?"

"Does such a sentiment bother you, Rubedo?"

"Of course it fucking bothers me!" He exclaimed, jumping down from his place on the couch to stand in front of him. "You put me through all of that! You forced me into submission. You-you inflicted all of that pain for nothing? Just because U-DO made you do it?"

Albedo seemed a little surprised by his outburst. "Rubedo, I informed you countless times of my disease. It was the basis for my every action."

Jr. stared dumbfounded and angry at him. Albedo stared back, a serene expression for once covering his face. As if U-DO had never touched him with its madness. "You...you bastard," Jr. finally managed to whisper. "You motherfucking bastard."

"Rubedo? Did you wish for me to pine for you always?" Albedo asked, "To constantly fight for the smallest amount of attention from you? To force you into unwilling compliance? Push Nigredo out of the way for my own space? Torment you always?"

"No! No...but..."

"Nigredo has your heart, Rubedo," Albedo said, touching the right side of Jr.'s chest softly, "Mine has belonged to you from the beginning. Sane or insane, dead or alive, I love you, Rubedo."

Albedo frowned, "The problem with us is that no matter how hard I tried in delusion to make you understand you would never accept it."

He felt his smaller half relax at the realization, "The only emperor is the emperor of ice cream."

Albedo smiled, "I did spout nonsense."

"Beautiful bullshit."

"Ah, indeed."

Jr. sighed and made his way back to Gaignun. "At least it made sense to you. If you pay close attention and spend time to dissect it maybe more of it does. It's just who really gives a fuck, Albedo?"

Albedo grinned in delight, "And that is the aforementioned attitude."

Jr. grinned also, "Yeah, I'm a pretty rude dude, huh?"

Jr. scanned the monitors and counted wires for what seemed the thousandth time that day and the zillionth time during the weeks Gaignun had been strapped to the bed. The Durandal's infirmary hadn't worked, as Jr. had guessed but the bridge and the rest of the ship had been eradicated of enemies so the moment he stumbled in with Gaignun the crew forced the barely operational Durandal back to Second Miltia, the closest planet. Helmer had been contacted ahead of time and people were ready and waiting to take Gaignun away. Originally they tried to take him without Jr., but a lot of threats and convincing from chaos persuaded them to change their minds.

"Blunt, rather. Truth isn't always a beautiful thing."

"Ain't that the damn truth?"

He gazed sadly at the man, "But Gaignun's going to wake up. He's going to wake up really soon, aren't you?" Jr. leaned up to stroke his arm lovingly. "I'm so short."

Arms wrapped around him softly. "This is not a bad thing."

"I couldn't even lift him without you. If you hadn't been there he might not have made it this far. I'm not strong enough to protect him."

"Apart we're weak. Nigredo has sought to remedy that. How do you feel now, Dragon?"

The door slid open loudly behind him and Jr. jerked toward the sound, blushing at the fact that Albedo's arms were around him so intimately until he realized no one could see him.

"Jr.?" a small voice asked softly.

"MOMO." Jr. said, smiling. That seemed to give her enough courage to enter. The Realian made her way in, blue hat in hand, an unsure glow in her golden eyes. "Hey there. How's it goin'?"

"Pêche." Albedo smirked, as way of greating.

_She can't hear you and even if she could you would never _never_ call her that. You understand me?_

Albedo huffed at that but Jr. ignored him and set his attention on MOMO.

"How's Gaignun?" she asked timidly, wringing the hat in her hand.

"Same, unfortunately," he answered, his smile dropping. Worried that she'd said something wrong she searched frantically for something to say. Jr. shook his head, finding the situation cute. "It's alright MOMO. He'll wake up soon. He's just lazy that's all."

_She's still infatuated with you. Poor little __Pêche_.

_Albedo, I'll find a way to kill you, I swear._

"Of course he will," MOMO nodded.

Loud mechanical footsteps sounded from the hallway. "Old man," Jr. laughed, "I'd know that clank anywhere."

"Yes," MOMO giggled, "Ziggy wanted to check up on the two of you."

"Heh. Well isn't that nice of him."

_What manner of beast is this?_ Albedo asked excitedly, walking up to the cyborg once he entered.

"Jr.," Ziggy spoke in his deep voice, completely unaware of Albedo's presence. "How is he?"

"Uh..." Jr. said, trying to take his eyes off his brother, "He's still out of it."

_Albedo what are you doing?_

Albedo walked around Ziggy in predatorial circle, his trademark wicked smile on his face. _Why wasn't I informed of the existence of such a lovely specimen?_

Jr. tilted his head to one side, earning him strange looks from his friends.

"What about you? Are you alright?"

He shook his head and forced his eyes up to Ziggy's. "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. I didn't think you were capable of emotions, there old man. Tell me the truth, MOMO made you come down here didn't she?" He winked at her, causing a pink blush to color her cheeks.

_Albedo, really what are you doing?_ _You've seen him before. He fought you at the Song of Nephilim._

_Really? I was unaware of everyone but you, Rubedo._

"I came down here of my own accord. Is that so unbelievable?"

No, what was unbelievable to Jr. was Albedo's fascination with the cyborg. He poked at him, fingers sliding through metal. The younger man proded at him and attempted to move the wheels and mechanics that operated him. Jr. held in a laugh as he answered, "To me it is."

He was trying so hard to contain his laughter as Albedo shoved an arm through the middle of Ziggy's head that it surprised him when MOMO asked, "And Albedo? How-how's Albedo?"

Albedo stopped at that too, looking down a little amazed at the Realian, surprised also that she would care.

"He's fine, MOMO," Jr. said smiling softly at her, "It's sweet of you to ask."

_Indeed._ Albedo sent, standing behind her.

"Well...could you, could you tell him I said 'Hi'?"

"I hear you, Pêche. Tell her that I am sorry, Rubedo. For everything."

Jr. nodded happily and walked toward MOMO, pulling from around his wrist the bracelet she had given him. He picked up one of her hands and placed it in her small palm.

"He hears you and says he's sorry. Thank you, MOMO."

Her eyes sparkled happily, searching the room for something to tell her where Albedo was. "Well he took care of you...or sort of and you're ok and Gaignun's going to be ok so I completely and utterly forgive him. Be nice to Jr., ok, Albedo?"

"I like this synethetic better than the real thing." Albedo voiced, coming to stand behind Jr. "If not for your wanting of Death I would approve of this one."

Jr. rolled his eyes. "He says he will. In fact he promises."

MOMO nodded happily, clutching the bracelet to her chest. Jr. looked up to Ziggy, "You don't have to follow her around anymore you know?" He quickly turned his attention back to her. "Did you tell him how awesome you were? She saved my life."

The blush turned deep red at his words as she tried to hide behind her hat. "Is that so?" Ziggy asked, placing a hand on her shoulder, smiling warmly down at her.

_What do you mean, Rubedo?_ Albedo asked curiously. Jr. told them all the story of the fight with Citrine. MOMO blushing the whole time and trying to vanish behind her hat while Ziggy listened intently, both upset that she had faced such danger without him and proud that she had stood on her own.

"Yes, I definately approve."

"You are never to put MOMO in such danger again."

Jr. sighed, "Yeah, yeah."

MOMO abandoned her vanishing act and peaked out from behind her hat. "Ok Jr. I have to go see Mommy now. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were."

Jr.'s smile dropped a bit at that, knowing her visit with her "mother" wouldn't be as exciting as she was hoping it would. He was thankful for Ziggy. Albedo frowned too at the emotions emitting from Jr. Jr. shrugged it off and took her goodbye hug happily. He made another quip towards Ziggy that the cyborg ignored as MOMO waved a goodbye to Albedo who returned awkwardly. Once they were gone Jr. returned to his post at Gaignun's side, urging him to wake up. Which for Jr., came in the form of curse words and half-empty threats. Tired, Jr. made his way back to the couch, settling down to rest for a few moments.

"So tell me," he said to Albedo, "You got a crush on Ziggy now?"

_Jealous?_

"You wish."

Albedo grinned. "No really though, what was it about him that had you all over him?"

_I have heard of him before from someone who's madness stems from a darker place perhaps than even mine. _

"Someone's got it out for cyborg?"

_He is a walking corpse as I am now a restless spirit. We both have wished for it but have been denied death. His pain is greater for he has tasted the afterlife and was ripped harshly from it. Blinded during youth rather than at birth._

"Are you saying that it's harder for him than it was for you because he's actually gotten to experience death and was brought back?"

Albedo nodded. _Something along those lines. I believe he has found happiness in this life._

"And you?"

Albedo snickered. _Intriguing._

"Albedo where did you go? I mean, who did you talk to and how did you get this power?"

Albedo ignored him. "Albedo?" When he continued to ignore him Jr. gave up. He had his entire life to figure it out.

"Well I like Old Man Ziggy and I need him around for MOMO's sake. If he doesn't undergo life extension soon he's gonna be out of the picture."

_From the way he looks at Ma Pêche, I am certain he will do so if it is in her best interest._

Jr. looked back over at Gaignun, worriedly checking his heartbeat again. Thinking about life extension alerted him back to his brother's condition.

_He will be fine, Rubedo._

"Yeah? How can you be so sure? He's...mortal. Fragile."

_You have always been aware of it._

"Not until I had to fight him. I mean hell I could've shot you until the world collapsed and you'd still be alive. One bullet in the wrong place and he could die instantly. You shattered a few vertebrae when you slammed him against that floor too, you know. Ever heard of being gentle?"

_Gentle is a word that has no meaning if the person I am fighting wishes to harm you._

"Yeah but it was Gaignun."

_It was Dmitri._

Jr. placed the palm of his hand against his head to ward off an oncoming headache. "No."

_To get to one I had to attack both. There was no other way, Rubedo._

"I didn't cut the link fast enough. I must have hurt him or something."

_Rubedo..._

"What am I going to do? If he doesn't wake up I'll--I'll--"

_Rubedo, calm down. He will be fine. I promise you._

Jr. frowned and rubbed his head. "Even if he does wake up he's not going to live forever. I'm going to out-live him. Either way he dies and then what?"

Albedo chuckled darkly at that. _And now you understand my dilemma._

Sharp anger cut through him, giving Albedo a strange pleasure at the fact that a link didn't need to be open between them any longer.

_People die, Rubedo. Even the ones we love most. But when Nigredo is gone I will still be here. And while the death of the Executioner does not bring me as much joy as it used to, it will be then that I can truly have you._

_Sick bastard._

_Love: What criminals it makes of us._

Jr. felt a sudden need to be near Gaignun. He needed to be sure that he was alive and that he was real.

"I love him, Albedo."

"And I love you, Rubedo."

Jr. took hold of Gaignun's hand. _Then what are we going to do about it?_

Albedo leaned close to Rubedo's ear. "I am going to sleep because your Juliet is about to wake from her slumber so be quick and forsake your poison."

Jr.'s eyes widened as the grip on his hand tightened. A small painful groan escaped the man in bed.

"Gaignun!"

"Call for me, Romeo, when you are in need."

"Albedo?"

_I will marry thee at they will, sire._

He felt his brother slip away, going quiet and finding his place in Jr.'s mind. Another groan and Gaignun's eyes were beginning to flicker open. Jr. could barely contain himself. He cried out happily and tried to climb onto the bed but was too short. Too ecstatic to be frustrated, he ran around the hospital room and dragged a chair over to the bed. He scrambled into it. When he made it into the chair and was about to make his way onto the bed he was delighted to see Gaignun's eyes wide open. His eyes scanned the room, confused until they landed on Jr.

"Jr.?"

"Gaignun!" Jr. yelled again, uncaring of the volume of his voice. He dove onto him, wrapping his arms around his neck.

"Gaignun, I can't believe it. I can't fucking believe it." His arms tightened. "You're awake and you're here! You're here and I'm here...we're both here! And I have no fucking idea how to say what I want to and I can't even think I'm so happy!"

He was sure now by his grip he was probably hurting Gaignun. The fact that he wasn't saying anything was bothering Jr. but he just decided that he had surprised him in his fit of excitement. He pulled himself back to look at his brother. Gaignun stared back at him strangely as if examining him. Jr. didn't notice. "Well?" he asked, beaming at him, "Aren't you going to say something?"

Gaignun's eyes suddenly turned angry. Before Jr. had time to react, Gaignun's hand was around his throat.

"I'm tired of this, Dmitri!"

"Gaignun?!" Jr. choked, trying to pry his fingers away from his neck. Gaignun snarled angrily and tightened his hold, cutting off Jr.'s airway completely.

"I'm getting out of here one way or another!"

* * *

AN: Yeah. I did that. *siigh* Team Albedo I beg you to bury me b/c Team Gaignun? They're going to kill me. --;

Reviews are my muse so inspire it up, people. CX


	38. Trust

A/N: Have any of you guys ever been in a mood where you're so happy that you could cry? XD B/c I- at the request of a friend- somehow found my way into the Pirates of the Caribbean fandom and stumbled upon Jack SparrowxDavy Jones. WTF? XD That really exists? *blinks* Wow. XD For some reason this amuses me greatly. (You can love it all you want, Stairsin but no...just no.) And instead of reading something I'm sure would blind me forever it made me want to write. So you can all thank her for another update. XD

I'm not afraid of you Team Gaigun! Threaten me all you want but I will not give in to your demands! DX  
(Why do I say things like that? XD)  
And I haven't been contaminated by U-DO either! XD Seriously what is wrong with you guys?

Also for those of you who have sent me your questions:  
They Are Golden! XD *hugs* This is going to be fun.

I do not own Xenosaga b/c I wouldn't want to own something else that could possibly anger Team Gaignun. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 38  
Trust

_Gaignun! Gaignun stop! What are you doing? _Jr. sent, struggling with all his might to breathe. His attempt at communication only earned him a impossibly tighter grip and a violent shake.

"I've killed you once already and I can do it again."

_Gaignun...!_

"I don't care what you have to say to me. I don't care if you tell Yuriev, in fact tell him! I can't live like this anymore!"

_I don't know what you're talking about. Stop!_

"That's not going to work! You're not Jr.!"

Jr. tried to work out what Gaignun had just said so that he could defend himself but he was getting weaker. Black spots invaded his vision and his body slowly become limp. Gaignun could feel the struggling lessen and knew that just a few more painful seconds and this nightmare would be over. A flash of energy coursed through his extended arm in a vice-like grip. When he looked down for the source he was surprised to find a ghostly gloved hand wrapped around him. Another flash caused him to release his hold on Jr. The boy coughed and spluttered harshly against invading oxygen and hurriedly made his way off the bed.

"Albedo?" Gaignun muttered.

_Lay another hand on him, on _us_, Nigredo and I will not hesitate to destroy you. _Albedo hissed angrily, leaning down so that Gaignun could be sure of his threat. His frown shifted at the corners into an evil smile. _No, I would find much pleasure in such provocation._

Gaignun stared in amazement at him. "Nice trick, Father. I thought you'd programmed the imitation to say things like 'Albedo doesn't exist in this world'. When did you change your mind?"

Albedo's smile grew wider then. _You still believe that you are trapped? The fact that I didn't exist in whatever hell you resided amuses me, brother._

Albedo felt tugging on him and he turned back to look at Jr. The boy held a hand around his bruised throat, shaking his head furiously.

_Leave him alone, he's just confused._

_Then I shall straighten things out for him. _Albedo threatened venomously.

_I mean it Albedo! Stop it. Go back to sleep. I'm fine. He won't do it again._

Albedo pulled back, scowling at Gaignun the entire way. _I will not be able to properly rest._

_Then be restless about it I don't give a damn!_

_Rubedo..._

_Just please. I just need to talk to him. You don't have to sleep just be quiet and come back. None of that ghost-being crap, alright?_

Albedo grudgingly obeyed, constantly alert and warning Jr. that if Gaignun tried that again it'd be his last attempt on their life. Jr. tried to collect himself as best he could. He rubbed his neck and took a few steps away farther from the bed, pulling the chair back with him before sitting in it and looking up at Gaignun.

"Whatever you're going to say is not going to sway me. I know this is a trick."

Gaignun checked his surroundings, eyes falling on the IVs placed in his skin. He frowned at them. "How I got here I'm not particularly sure of but..."

"Gaignun."

Gaignun's attention turned toward the boy. His eyes accusing. Jr. ignored it and took a deep breath.

"Gaignun, what's the last thing you remember?"

"As if you don't know."

Jr. frowned, "I've been waiting three weeks for you to wake up and this is how you say hello? By trying to kill me? That doesn't exactly live up to what you told me earlier and it's not really nice. Hell, as go as far as to say it hurt my feelings."

"You never had any."

That seemed to really upset him from where Gaignun was but he didn't care. It was an imitation after all.

"Wow," Jr. said, surprised, "Didn't know you could be such a bastard. Thanks for helping me realize. I'll need that for future reference." He chuckled to himself, "I'm glad you're awake though. I was afraid that I'd screwed something up with the sudden link collapse. By your memory loss I guess that only proves it but..." He threw his hands up in frustration, "Hell, I don't know. I'm sorry I guess? I'm not sure what I should say to you because I have a feeling you're going to throw up everything I say, right?"

They were both quiet for a moment before Gaignun decided to speak.

"You've really almost got me believing you're really Jr. I hope he's alright and you're not gaining his mannerisms from the fact that you've been spending time with or hurting him."

"Look, what do you want me to do, Gaignun? How am I supposed to prove it's me? I mean Albedo freakin' threw himself at you like an attack dog and you still don't think it's me?"

Jr. stood up and gestured to the mass of nothingness beside him, "Albedo. You know? The guy you decided to stick me with for the rest of my life? Don't you remember any of that?"

He walked back toward the bed despite Albedo's roars of protest. "I don't know what dad did to you, Gaignun. I do know that this is the second time you've tried to kill me and with anyone else that'd be two too many. But I love you and I know you love me or the real Jr. whatever. How can I prove it's me? What do I have to do?"

"Get away from me," Gaignun said, trying to push himself up and out of the hospital bed.

"I'm not going anywhere!" Jr. shouted, fed up. "This is real. I'm real. You are being stupid. I know you're sick or hurt or whatever but here's what happened: Dad's dead. Albedo got rid of him. You threw Albedo into my body to put us together, make us complete, I don't know why you did it. You almost died in an attempt to ride out and make sure dad got sent to where ever and I collapsed the link to save you. You passed out and you've been in a coma for the past three weeks. Any of that ring a bell?"

It must have been because Jr. caught a sight of realization in Gaignun's green eyes. "That shit really happened. Believe me. I'm Jr."

"I want proof," Gaignun whispered, but Jr. could tell he was winning. "Give me some sort of proof that it really happened and I'll believe everything you say."

"Albedo's not enough?"

Gaignun shook his head, "If Yuriev won he would want to keep me quiet. Albedo would have to be a part of you if I remembered."

_Albedo, you're completely useless._ Jr. joked grimly.

Jr. searched his memory for something. He pulled off his jacket and ripped off his shirt.

_Rubedo, I hardly think now is the best time to strip for your beloved Death. _

_Shut up, Albedo! It's not like that._

Jr. finally pulled the offending shirt off. "Look," he said, pointing to a bandage covering his chest. He peeled it off, slowly wincing slightly at pain the action brought. When he finally peeled it off he gave a relieved sigh. Gaignun's eyes widened at the wound. The skin on the left side of his chest was charred a dark black color, specks of red flesh dotted in places but it seemed as if most of it was beginning to heal. The sight sickened the buisnessman. "Jr..."

"Nasty, huh? Dad did that. Motherfucker shot me right here." He frowned down at it, "Still that bad after three weeks and I have another right here." he said, patting his left hip.

"Or actually it's your fault," he smirked, "So I think you should believe me now. I took two lasers, a dislocated shoulder, a few busted ribs, and now strangulation for you so I exp-"

Gaignun grabbed his arm and very gently pulled him up. Albedo protested but Jr. kept him quiet. His touch wasn't threatening this time. When Gaignun had finally pulled him up high enough, he looked him over, eyes running up and down his small body.

"Tell me..." he said, keeping his voice gentle so as not to frustrate the new fire. "When was the first time you told me you loved me?"

Jr. was confused at the sudden change in topic. It seemed sort of random and misplaced. Something in Gaignun's eyes desperately wanted an answer though and if it made Jr. real then why the hell not? It couldn't hurt. "The day those Federation idiots came and took me away. Why?"

A dazzling smile spread across his face and Gaignun carefully pulled him into a hug.

"It really is you."

Jr. sighed into the touch, thankful that his answer hadn't earned him a painful outcome. "Yeah. It's really me."

Gaignun pulled back. "Jr. I'm so sorry."

"You should be."

"That wound's horrible."

"I know, Gaignun, I can feel it."

"We have to cover it back up."

"No we don't."

"Yes we do."

"No," Jr. smiled, "We don't."

"Why?" Gaignun said, worry thick in his voice, "We need to cover it before it gets infected."

"No." Jr. said, smile growing.

"Jr." Gaignun frowned, "I'll call a doctor or nurse or-"

"And tell them what? That I was trying to prove to my boyfriend that I was real so I ripped it off?"

Gaignun grinned and shook his head. "Jr.," he laughed. "Definitely Jr."

"Gaignun I--" Jr. started, a bit embarrassed at what he was about to say. Gaignun caught his thought. And as much as he loved the ever-rare blush creeping in a thin line across Jr.'s face along with the way he seemed absolutely tongue-tied, he said it for him.

"I've missed you, Jr. So much," Gaignun said. So very carefully, so that he wouldn't pull him forward too far and scrape the wound on his chest, he placed his hand on the back of Jr.'s neck and brought him closer. He felt his heart swell at the darkening color on Jr.'s cheeks. He couldn't remember how long it'd been since he'd been so close to Jr. The real Jr. His Jr. But as he brought Jr. closer to him a different color on Jr.'s skin began to bother him.

"Jr.," The older boy looked up at him, blinking out of his trance.

"Yeah?"

Gaignun ran a thumb over the bruise he had made. Jr. noticed what he was upset about and rubbed his arm comfortingly. "It's ok."

Gaignun shook his head, "When I got you back after Albedo hurt you I swore I'd never let anything bad happen to you again and here I am causing you pain. I almost killed you...not once but twice...And we might as well count every move Dmitri Yuriev made against you as my fault as well."

"Or-Or--!" Jr. said, climbing up further to sit on his abdomen, careful of the wires. "We could blame the bastard who was controlling you and start where we left off."

"No, Jr. That's something I'll never be able to forgive myself for and..." He traced a finger down the front of his chest. "What if I forget tomorrow or the next day? What if I go crazy and can't control myself?"

Jr. shrugged, "Well then I guess that's something I'll have to deal with."

"That's something you shouldn't have to deal with."

"You're right, I shouldn't."

Then Gaignun said something that surprised him, "I gave you Albedo. You don't need me."

"Gaignun..." Jr. said, not even trying to hide the angry shock. "You really tried to kill youreself, didn't you? And Albedo, he was supposed to be your replacement?!"

"I'm dangerous." Gaignun murmured quietly.

"And he's not?!"

"Not to you. He just saved you from me."

"And you've saved me from him."

"Not enough."

This whole talk was pissing him off. Angrily he smacked Gaignun upside the head. "Ow, Jr--"

"Shut the fuck up right now!"

"You're right. I probably deserved it."

"Damn straight! I'm tired of this, Gaignun. I'm not a scoreboard and I'm tired of being tossed back and forth between the two of you!"

He gave Albedo a strong mental kick and knocked him out of their body. He needed to hear this too. "I know what's best for me." Jr. said, pointing to himself. "I'm twenty-six. I'm a grown man...on the inside at least and I think like a grown man!"

Jr. snapped his head back to Albedo. "I think therefore I am."

Albedo grinned at that. "I'm the leader," Jr. continued, "I'm the leader and I'm the oldest and I'm not going to take this anymore."

He took Gaignun's face in his hands and forced him to look at him. "I love you and I know you love me so don't sit there and pretend that the thought of Albedo and I doesn't upset you."

"I love both of you." He emphasized, "You're my brothers and there's no way I'm not going to but I'm in love with you, Gaignun."

He pointed towards Albedo, "YOU are going to go to sleep because you haven't slept but for a few measly hours in years. I'm not going to walk around tired all the time because my other half decided he was going to stay awake for the next two thousand years." Jr. dropped his hands away from Gaignun's face, "Bitch about it if you want but that's how things are going to go," he announced to both of them. He nodded to himself, proud that he had put his foot down. He waited for one of them to say something but neither of them did.

"Well?" Jr. said, crossing his arms but jerking back when his arm scrapped against his wound. "Anything from my subordinates would be nice."

Albedo and Gaignun smiled softly at the same time which bothered Jr. They were talking to each other and apparently it was funny. "What?" he asked, finally.

"I'm sorry, Jr." Gaignun said, "It's just really hard to take you seriously when you have your shirt off."

Jr. blushed and Albedo's hysterical laughter filled the room.

"I'm not a woman! What does it matter?" Jr. shouted.

_You are Death's little bitch boy, Rubedo!_ Albedo sent, trying to stop his fierce giggling. _Your shirtless form is just as appealing._

Masculinity effectively shattered Jr. began his usual tactic of furious ranting which started with one of his most favorite curse words, "Goddammit, Gaignun! You are not getting off to a good start with me and Albedo I swear to God if you don't shut your damn mouth I'll kill you. Yeah, that's right I said it. I'd willing commit suicide to get that noise to stop! Then what are you going to do, Gaignun? I'd be dead and it'd be all YOUR fault because Albedo wouldn't be making that noise if you hadn't said something so fucking stupid! And if either of you ever refer to me as a 'little bitch boy' again I'll kill us all!"

"Alright, ok, Jr. I'm sorry." Gaignun said, laughing. "I won't think anything like that again."

Albedo's laughter rang out again making Jr. all the more angry. Before he could make his anger audible, however, Gaignun grabbed him and pulled him into a passionate kiss. Jr. tried to stop his melting because he was supposed to be mad but it wasn't working and when they finally pulled apart Jr. tried his damnedest to say something insulting. Again Gaignun beat him to it. He leaned in again, "You're terribly cute when you pout."

_Rubedo. _Albedo said, distracting the pair. He walked over to them and stared warningly at Gaignun.

_I will sleep but the moment Nigredo decides to pick up his scythe I will be there to rip him apart. _

"He won't."

Gaignun frowned and averted his gaze from Albedo's. "He won't." Jr. said, frustrated that he had to command Gaignun to trust himself.

_Because I could not stop for Death he kindly stopped for me. The carriage held but just ourselves and Immortality. That is the image of Death I hope will be maintained. Anything less..._

"Albedo, he'll be good. You can kick his ass if he misbehaves. There. Stop being so fucking dramatic and go to sleep."

_Rest sounds pleasant. Wake me up, sometime. I'd love to talk with you, dear Rubedo._

"Sure you would," Jr. said, winking. "But I'm not sure if I'd want to talk to you. I mean..."

Albedo rolled his eyes. _Dramatic?_

"Bonne nuit, Albedo."

Albedo smiled contentedly at the sound of his favorite language. He chuckled and shook his head, "Goodnight, Rubedo."

Albedo returned to his other half happily. Jr. shivered at the strange feeling. He was definately going to have to get used to that. He yawned and stretched.

"Wow, Albedo's got me sleepy too."

"He must have been really tired."

Jr. nodded, "Really really tired. He stayed up to watch you the few times I slept so he could wake me up when you opened your eyes. So I guess I never really slept since we're connected."

"I didn't hear you cursing as much," Gaignun said softly.

"That's because I was too scared to threaten you awake. I'm glad you're not dead though," Jr. yawned again and rubbed his eyes, "That would've sucked."

"For you, yes."

Jr. sighed, a dreamy smile on his face. "Keep it up Gaignun, and I'll have to kill you." He shook his head in an effort to keep himself awake.

"Jr., why don't you sleep now?" Gaignun questioned, rubbing his back. "I'm awake so you don't have to worry."

"No," Jr. said, shaking his head, "No. I"m not sleepy."

"You fight sleep like a child."

"You accept it like an old person."

Gaignun laughed and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. Jr. groaned, "Fine. I'll sleep but only if I can sleep up here with you."

Worry made its way onto Gaignun's face. "Nothing bad's going to happen. You've got to get over this. We're moving on."

Gaignun started to object but he had to admit that he'd missed sleeping with Jr. The bruise along his neck and the wound on his chest kept reminding him of how dangerous he was to his "little" brother, however and he almost couldn't stand for Jr. to be so close to him. Part of Gaignun wished Jr.'s common sense would kick in while the other was rejoicing at the thought that Jr. still wanted him. Jr. could guess at the thoughts in Gaignun's mind and hated every single one of them. Finally fed up with whatever was hiding behind his expression, Jr. opened a link and scattered all his thoughts.

_Stop it._

_Jr._

_Gaignun. See? I can say your name too. Now if you're done playing Idiocy, I want to sleep. _

Jr. shoved his way over onto Gaignun's left side, pushing his arm and wires out of his way. Gaignun didn't stop him as he pushed his way into a comfortable position.

"Jr., what about your wound?" Jr. shrugged and placed a hand on Gaignun's chest, coaxing him to relax.

"What about it? It's not bleeding."

"When has there ever been a time when you weren't hurt during our sleep?" Gaignun wondered aloud, eyes still connected with the burned flesh.

"Never so why should we break tradition? You're not exactly undamaged yourself. Now shut up and lay back so I can sleep."

Gaignun gave in and slid down carefully, a strange feeling in his back alerting him to something. He was about to ask Jr. but decided it could wait seeing as how the little red-head was already asleep. He smiled fondly at the sight he'd been deprived of for so long and bent down to place his lips against Jr.'s forehead before closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep himself.

* * *

A/N: Finished. C: So we've got about two more chapters to go before we're actually done. Or at least I think so. I had originally planned this story to end 20 chapters ago. XD I don't know what happened. Right, so two more. And there is no reason that I should be killed by Gaignunists this chapter! XD Albedists...eh, maybe. But he's not dead! *points* Reviews are my muse so inspire it up people. CX


	39. Media

A/N: C: Hello again. Yeah, Team Gaignun won. But it was definately NOT because of their conduct. --; If I hadn't had this story planned out already I would have given Jr. to the Albedists just b/c they were so much nicer.

You heard me! No back-sassing! I am the all-powerful author! DX

Psh. XD What a load.

Thank you again for the questions everyone. CX They are all so fun and Nigredo's Oblivion calm down. XD Your questions don't have to be perfect. I'm sure none of them will offend anyone. Just relax.

On with the story!

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters and no amount of unicorn hairs is going to change that.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 39  
Media

It was dark. It was so dark that he couldn't see anything. Confused, he looked around and tried to find a source of light, any source of light. He stumbled awkwardly through the pitch blackness that was engulfing the entire area. He could tell that something bad was about to happen. His breathing was labored and echoed through the dark room loud and hallow back towards him, making him even more alert for any change in that sound. Humans are strange creatures when fear sets in. They almost become animalistic: eyes wide, ears straining to hear for danger, mind focused sharply for any sign of anything even potentially harmful. Jr. was like that in that aspect but he would press his back against something to find his way out. Nothing was going to catch him from behind. The sliding of the door caught his attention and his head snapped in that direction. Light filtered in, destroying some of the pitch black shadow that laid claim to the room. 'Run!' His mind screamed, 'Don't stick around to find out who's there, run damnit!' Why he never listened was a question that rang in his ears as the door slid open further. 'Run motherfucker!' And he just stood there. Why wouldn't he move?! The door slid those last few inches and let the light enter fully into the room, sliding across his shoes. No one was there. A relieved sigh escaped his throat. He was finally starting to calm down when something suddenly grabbed him from behind.

"Holy shit!" Jr. screamed. It surprised him so much that he fell backwards out of his chair and onto the hard hospital floor.

"Jr.?" Gaignun asked, trying to hide his amusement.

"Ow..." he groaned, rubbing the back of his head. He looked back up at the screen as the lead actor tried to escape the serial killer.

"I didn't think you were afraid of these kinds of movies." The younger man said, reaching to click to a different broadcast.

"It's not me!" Jr. defended, "It's Albedo! He's such a big baby!"

Gaignun rolled his eyes. "Alright, Jr."

"And don't change it either." He said, climbing back into the chair. He sat in it backwards and rested his chin on the top of its back.

"Run, idiot! Why don't you ever listen to me?!" He shouted at it again. Gaignun merely shook his head and waited for the next part that would send Jr. back to the floor.

"Don't! Don't go that way!" Jr. exclaimed angrily at the screen. He stood up in his chair. "He's right behi--Ugh! Are you really that stupid?! What did you just trip over, thin air?! Get up! A fall like that's not going to break your fucking ankle! I know, trust me I know." He threw up his hands in disbelief at the character, "Why are the girls the ones who are so stupid? Get up! What? Was there another bump in the stream of absolutely nothing to knock you all the way down again? Why are you even bleeding? There wasn't anything sharp. Run!"

"Jr., if you don't stop screaming I'm going to have to turn off the movie."

Jr. didn't say anything but kept quiet enough to please Gaignun...or quiet enough on the outside. With his eyes glued on the movie and his hands gripping the back of his chair roughly he bit back shouting by biting his lips and screaming them down the link.

_Gaignun, why? Why are people in these sorts of movies so stupid?! He's right there! He's right there how can you NOT see him? Why are you breathing so loud? Oh, thank God her boyfriend's back. Maybe she'll stop being so idioti--_

Gaignun couldn't help but smile as Jr.'s eyes widened. The serial killer was creeping up behind the man and the woman was so frightened by his presence she was frozen on spot. Gaignun was counting the moments. Jr. was going to hit the floor in three...two...

The door to Gaignun's room slid open fast, "Gaignun Kukai!"

Jr. yelled again but caught himself before he smacked hard linoleum again.

"Watching scary movies?"

Jr. frowned and scrambled his way back into the chair. "Helmer what makes you think that you can come into a hospital room shouting?"

Helmer raised a dark eyebrow at the boy. "I could hear you all the way down the hallway. I'm quite certain that it was your voice shouting things like 'Run!' and 'Get up!' "

Jr. grumbled something under his breath and Helmer laughed. "Glad to see you're alright, Jr."

He walked over to Gaignun. "Well I'm glad to see you've grown accustomed to our aliases."

"It took a while," he said, smiling, "But with all the press and media coverage along with the political mess you've personally caused me it's suddenly become a very common name that I have to speak often."

"Nothing you can't handle, I'm sure," Gaignun responded smoothly.

"Something you should be grateful I care enough to deal with. Which actually brings me to what I've come here for."

"Oh," Jr. grinned. He leaned on the foot of Gaignun's bed and stared up at the representative. "I see. You didn't come to check on us. You came to give us work, right? I see how it is, Helmer."

"Work," he chuckled, "Perhaps I have. For once it's not on paper. It's just merely a press conference. I'm sure Gaignun could handle it that is if you're up to it."

Gaignun started to say something but Jr. interrupted him, "No he's not. He's still got a few days until they discharge him and I don't think it would be a good idea for all those media fanatics to come pouring down the hospital hallways."

"Jr., it's alright. The doctor said that I should be able to move out of this bed now. In fact didn't he encourage it?"

Jr. waved a hand to shut him up, "He doesn't know what he's talking about."

Helmer shook his head and sighed, "Well Jr., I wasn't going to force him to go. It was simply a suggestion to end some rumors-"

"-Rumors?"

Helmer nodded, "Yuriev stirred up quiet a few of them while you were gone. Most people want an explanation for what has just recently occurred. Canaan filled me in on most of the details but I thought it best that you decided how to explain the doctor's actions."

That seemed to depress Gaignun again. "There's no rational explanation," he murmured, averting his eyes.

"Well that's alright, Gaignun." Helmer said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I wouldn't want to see you back here so soon. All of this can wa-"

"I'll go."

The two looked down at the young man. He shrugged, "What? My 'dad' is in the hospital and I know what happened. I'll just get out there, give a summary, answer some questions. I know how it all goes. I've been with Gaignun plenty of times."

_I'm sure you have._

Jr. sighed and placed his forehead into his palm. Of course. _Aren't you supposed to be asleep_, _Albedo?_

_Aw, but I missed you, dear sweet Rubedo._

"Jr.?" Gaignun asked.

"Yeah um..." Jr. said, shaking himself out of it. "I'll go."

"Are you sure?" Gaignun asked, "I'm alright to go. Allow me to go with you at least."

Jr. shook his head, "You can't."

"Yes I can."

"No..." Jr. said, pulling his communicator out of his back pocket and pressing a button. "Lil' Master?"

"Hey Mary," Jr. said, smiling into the screen. "I've got to be somewhere and Gaignun's oh so lonely here by himself. You think you and your sister could keep him company?"

"Of course, Lil' Master! We'll be right over!" Mary squealed happily. Jr. nodded and pressed the button again, turning it off. He winked at Gaignun, "...You can't."

* * *

_And it was wise to leave Nigredo in the hands of such women?_

Jr. shrugged. _I trust him._

_Unwise decision._

_Let the wenches dawdle in such dress as they are used to wear._

_Are you claiming them to be classified amoung those who share the conduct of a seductress?_

_I'm saying leave them alone. They're part of the family. They've always looked after Gaignun. What happens happens._

_Testing Death?_

_Testing you. Shut the hell up._

"Jr."

"chaos," Jr. exclaimed, "How's it going buddy?"

chaos smiled his trademark melancholy smile. "Good. Representative Helmer."

Helmer nodded toward him. "Good to see you, chaos."

"He here to join the party?" Jr. asked Helmer, smirking at his friend.

"For support if nothing else." chaos answered calmly.

"Well good. I've got this monkey on my back that won't shut up. It'd be nice to have someone to calm me down."

chaos shook his head. The trio made their way to the Second Miltian Parliament building "Are you ready Jr.? Do you have any idea what you plan to say?" chaos questioned.

Jr. crossed his arms and tilted his head to the side. "I do. I've already got the whole thing down."

"And Gaignun? How's he?"

"He's fine now. He just opened his eyes yesterday. We've been fighting ever since."

chaos grinned, "Sounds like the storybook romance everyone dreams of."

Albedo giggled. _Oh my defective Cupid._

"One of these days, chaos," Jr. threatened playfully.

The moment they walked into the conference room people started shouting and asking questions. First toward Helmer, then toward Jr. once they realized he was there. chaos placed a hand on his shouder and bent down to whisper: "They're awfully eager to see you, Jr."

"Heh," Jr. scoffed, "Everyone wants a piece of me."

_Delicious candy._

_Suicide, Albedo. Suicide._

Helmer stood at a podium in the room, talking to the people of Second Miltia in long drawling tones that Jr. had heard Gaignun use when addressing the public. Helmer didn't capture their rapt attention the way Gaignun did but it was obvious where he learned the basics.

Gaignun grinned at that thought from his hospital bed. He shifted around uncomfortably.

"Somethin' wrong, Master Gaignun?" Mary asked, jumping to his side. "I can get you somethin'. Do I need to call the doctor? I can get him real quick. What about sittin' up? Lemme help ya' Master Gaignun."

Gaignun shook his head, "No Mary I'm fine, thank you." He shifted again, sighing against the strange metallic feeling in his spine. "It's going to take some getting used to."

"The effect the synthetic pieces have on you should vanish in time, Master Gaignun." Shelley said softly, then she turned to her sister. "Mary, please do not distract the Master any longer. I'm sure he is very eager to hear what our Little Master will say."

Mary nodded, feeling a bit foolish. "Don't be so hard on her, Shelley. She's just trying to help."

She blushed at the kindness in his voice and went back to her seat. Gaignun raised his eyes back to the screen. He had been worried about how Jr. would react to so much attention, but he seemed calm.

_Jr.? _Gaignun sent to make sure. In response Jr. looked to one of the cameras and winked at him.

_I'm a big boy now, Gaignun._

Gaignun's grin didn't go unnoticed by the two women in the room. _Glad to hear it._

Helmer finally finished the introductions and Jr. walked up to the podium. He had to stand on a small stool to be able to see over it, but Jr. didn't let it bother him. The minute he was in full view of the press they all started shouting and pushing each other for his attention. Gaignun watched as Jr. took a deep breath before holding up his arms to silence everyone. He didn't seem nervous, he seemed powerful and confident. He stared down at the people below him forcefully, commanding them to be quiet and to listen. After everyone was quiet he spoke:

"An unknown organization attempted to obtain the zohar emulators by kidnapping me and negotiating a ransom for my return. In an effort to rescue me, my father, Gaignun Kukai, launched the our warship, the Durandal. They intercepted our ship and in a surprise attack, infiltrated and killed all crew members onboard. We-" Jr. stopped for a moment as images of the gutted ship flashed behind his eyes. Gaignun frowned and leaned up towards the screen. He sent a comforting wave toward him which he accepted gratefully. Wearily he continued, "We managed to regain control of the ship and make our way back here. Now, if there are any questions..."

Everyone called for him at once. Jr.'s eyes scanned the crowd until he found someone.

"Gaignun Kukai Jr.," The woman asked quickly, "Where is your father now? What is his condition?"

"Dad's fine," Jr. said. Gaignun smiled. It had been really hard for him not to say "Gaignun". He was complaining to himself now because he never had to say dad when questioned at the Foundation.

_Keep it political, Jr._

_Keep it quiet, _Dad.

"He's recovering in a nearby hospital which, for his safety, I will not name."

"Jr.!" Another reporter shouted, "Just what is this organization's name and who was behind it? What could they have possibly wanted with the zohar?"

Gaignun watched Jr. bite back a sarcastic remark before answering, "This is all currently under investigation. I can not give any answers at this time."

Gaignun watched proudly as Jr. answered their questions with ease. He smiled and made occasional jokes. He made sure every reporter got a chance to talk. His responses were quick and smooth, smart as well, giving no one any indication of the lies beneath his words. 'Like a true politician', Gaignun thought with a smirk. Everything was going fine until one reporter, in the middle of Jr.'s sentence called out:

"What can you tell us about the mystery woman?"

'Mystery woman?' Gaignun thought. The same expression of confusion flashed across Jr.'s face.

"Mary, Shelley, do either of you know anything about a 'mystery woman'?" Gaignun asked quickly.

The both shook their heads. Gaignun frowned back at the screen. chaos was whispering something to Helmer. Jr. tried to turn his head but Gaignun reminded him to keep facing the people. Faced with nothing else to say Jr. simply stated, "I was not informed of a mystery woman."

"Is it true that she is your mother? If so is it in fact true that you are the illegitimate son of the young Gaignun Kukai?"

"Are you and Gaignun Kukai actually blood relatives?"

"What about the accusations of bribery to coax her into giving up all of her parental rights?"

"Is that why she and Gaignun met before he left? Has she been informed of your kidnapping?"

"Where does this place Mary and Shelley Godwin? Has Gaignun returned to the mother of his child or will his relationship with them continue?"

Everyone started shouting at once again. They shoved each other out of the way and continued to yell questions. Jr.'s blood was boiling. When had this conference turned from the political to unimportant gossip?

_Jr., just calm down and focus. Don't let them get to you. Don't say anything you'll regret._

Jr. gritted his teeth. _I won't regret it_. And he didn't. Jr. managed to keep his cool. Together he and Gaignun rushed through the all of the things he could say. They'd come up with a pretty good story when,

"Is it true that Gaignun Kukai is a pedophile?"

Jr.'s thoughts stopped instantly. He blinked in disbelief at what had just been said.

_Jr..._

"I-I'm sorry," Jr. said, gesturing with one hand and gripping the podium with the other. "I think I misunderstood the question asked. Could you repeat it?"

_Jr..._

"Is it true that you and your father are involved in a sexual relationship? Is that perhaps why your mother came to talk with him? Was it over the pending investigation into his relationship with you?"

'Oh God. Oh dear God please, please, spare that poor bastard.' Gaignun prayed, sitting up straight in his bed. Shelley stared wide-eyed while Mary covered her mouth with both hands.

Jr. trembled angrily. "Gaignun is a wonderful father. He has never ever done anything to me that I haven't wanted. He is not inappropriate--"

"Then you are a willing participant in this?"

That was it.

"Somebody stop him!" Gaignun yelled at the screen. chaos jumped up from his seat, almost as if he had heard Gaignun, but it was more likely that he saw Jr. reaching for his guns. The dark boy wrapped an arm around him pinning the red-head's small arms against his sides and grabbed the microphone with one hand.

"The charges against Gaignun Kukai were dropped long ago," he said sternly. "The Kukai family has been through enough these past few months. There is no need to open old wounds. Such a question was rude and uncalled for. Anymore comments like that will be met with appropriate action."

Jr. squirmed and cursed in chaos' hold. For someone so slender, chaos was pretty strong.

Helmer walked over to the two boys and nodded for chaos to leave. chaos practically dragged a fiery Jr. away and out of the room. Helmer frowned and began to scold the people of Miltia for such rude conduct and Gaignun relaxed back into his bed.

"That was dangerously close."

"It is unfortunate that the people would purposely upset a young boy to get answers."

"Shelley, the Lil' Master ain't a lil' boy. He's a grown man."

Gaignun shook his head. "Not to the public and that's what makes it so sad."

Albedo coudn't contain his laughter and the sound was only fueling the fire that was burning in Jr.'s chest. chaos rubbed Jr.'s back comfortingly as he led him to a chair in the hallway. "I'll go find you something to drink, Jr. I'll be right back, will you be alright?"

Jr. nodded, "Yeah. Sorry about that, chaos."

chaos smiled softly, "This time I don't think your actions were unjustified. Don't worry."

When chaos vanished down the curved hallway Jr. finally decided it was time to shut Albedo up.

_Shut the hell up!_ Albedo's laughter lessened at the upset waves in Jr.'s thought.

_Forgive me, Rubedo,_ Albedo said. His apology was sincere, but it didn't help matters. _I never knew that you and Nigredo lived such an entertaining lifestyle!_

Jr. frowned and Albedo finally stopped. He appeared behind him and wrapped ghostly arms around his brother. "I'm sorry, Rubedo. Did I upset you that much?"

Jr. shook his head, "No, not you. The idiots in there. Where do they get off?"

Albedo rested his chin on his shoulders. "Despicable creatures these humans." Albedo hissed in his ear. "Why not destroy them? You and Nigredo could bend them to your will."

Jr. shook his head and leaned back, falling through Albedo until his back hit the wall.

"No, that's not how we do things."

"Oh? And how does one bearing the name Kukai handle such matters?"

Jr. grinned and closed his eyes, letting out a relaxed sigh. "Stick around and maybe you'll find out."

* * *

Gaignun rubbed his head, trying to stifle the headache that was encroaching on his mind.

_Jr.? _Gaignun sent, worried. He didn't get an answer. Worried, he asked for him again.

_Hello, Nigredo._ Albedo answered cheerfully. _How are you this fine evening?_

Gaignun's eyes went wide.

_Yes, I am indeed awake. Oh no! Let us flee! The big bad monster has taken poor Rubedo once again!_

Gaignun gritted his teeth and gripped the sheets of his bed. _Albedo..._

_Do not fret, Death. The Dragon is merely busy and wishes for me to keep you company so that you 'Don't worry like the little girl he pretends he isn't'. Yes I believe those where his exact words._

Gaignun scowled.

"Master Gaignun? Is something the matter?" Shelley asked, rising from her seat. Gaignun shook his head.

_What is he doing? What's keeping him so busy?_

Albedo sighed dramatically. _Something I do not approve of in any way. _

That seemed to catch Gaignun off-guard. _Which would be...?_

_Something I do not approve of. _

_Albedo._

_What is it, Executioner? I have answered your question. _

_No you haven't, Albedo. I want a straight answer._

_That is the answer I was told to give if you asked. Though it is true that I do not approve of it as I find it rather unfair. We will have to do something about such a symbol after your death._

_Why? What's happening?_

Albedo seemed frustrated. _I am forbidden to tell you. Be patient. You will find out soon. But not until after your scolding._

_Scolding? _Gaignun asked.

_Yes. Good luck with that, dear brother. Rubedo doesn't seem happy._

Gaignun frowned but knew he wasn't going to get anything out of Albedo. He decided to drop the link and just try to relax by himself for once. If Albedo was right and Jr. really was upset with him for whatever reason, he would need at least some strength to handle him. Somewhere between talking to Mary and Shelley and wondering what he was in trouble for he drifted off the sleep. He was awakened when something slapped across his legs. Gaignun jerked a little at the sudden feeling and blinked sleep away to find Jr.'s frowning face.

"Jr.?"

"What the hell is that, Gaignun?" Jr. demanded, pointing to the object in his lap. Gaignun sighed, knowing he was going to have a hard time with whatever Jr. was ready to rant about. He looked down and found a magazine. Confused, he picked it up. He gaped at it. On the cover was a picture of himself holding Citrine's hand.

The mystery woman was Citrine.

"Uh...Mary, Shelley, do you think that you two could excuse us for a moment?"

They both nodded and bowed, leaving the two men alone. Silence filled the room as Gaignun stared in disbelief while Jr. stood with his arms crossed, waiting for an answer.

"Well?"

Gaignun continued to stare, "Well." He answered.

"What exactly happened between you and Citrine?" Jr. asked, a deep frown on his face.

Gaignun desperately tried to remember when this picture had been taken. "Uh..." he answered, knowing he was in trouble. It hadn't really been his fault had it? Not exactly...

"What happened between you and Albedo?" he asked, trying to turn the tables.

"Uh..." Jr. said, suddenly losing his anger. The question tickled Albedo immensely and he began to exit Jr.'s body so that he could tell Gaignun exactly what happened between them when Jr. forced him back down.

"So uh...this is who they think your mother is." Gaignun said, trying to change the subject.

Jr. was grateful for it and nodded, "Yeah I guess so."

Gaignun smiled then. "Well, she does look like you."

"And you too!"

Gaignun shook his head. "Hey, Jr...I don't know what happened...or I do and I um..."

"Hey, don't worry about it," Jr. said, "I mean, I um...well uh..."

"Yeah."

"Exactly."

"Alright."

"Fine."

"Wonderful."

Jr. smiled at him, "Well then, now that that's settled."

_Aw, so soon? No entertainment for me._ Albedo whined. Jr. rolled his eyes and continued, "I think you were about to go to sleep. Sorry I woke you up. Get some rest."

Jr. started to take the magazine but when he did Gaignun noticed something.

"Jr.," He said, pulling the boy's left hand to him. Black cloth surrounded the base of each finger. "What's this? Did you harm yourself in the short time you were gone? Are you ok?"

"Jeez, Gaignun. Think you could worry a little more? No. I haven't hurt myself. Here," Jr. dropped the magazine to the floor. "Pick one."

"Pick one?"

"Yeah," Jr. said, pulling Gaignun's other hand to his own. "Pick one."

"Ok...?" Gaignun pulled on the cloth surrounding his thumb and after a few seconds it fell off. He looked confused at it. It seemed fine. He started on another one but Jr. knocked his hand away.

"Nope, not yet."

"I don't understand."

"It's a game, Gaignun. You picked the wrong one. You'll have to play again later."

"Oh you terrible tease." He snickered, pulling Jr. up to him. He placed a small kiss on his lips. "I'm sorry about today. The conference was horrible I didn't think..."

"Eh, no worries," Jr. said, "Been through worse, right?"

"I love you." Gaignun answered,

Jr. grinned, "I love you too. Take some medicine and go back to sleep. You get a gigantic needle full of nanomachines tomorrow."

"Hooray," Gaignun groaned, leaning back in bed.

"And that's exactly the kind of reaction I'd expect from me," Jr. joked, finding his earlier discared chair and preparing to watch another horror movie but determined to be quiet through this one.

"You're a terrible influence," Gaignun sighed.

"Yeah, guess I am," he replied, biting back shouts at the idiots on screen.

_You aren't going to tell him, Rubedo?_

_No, why?_

_Well this may seem strange, however I believe Nigredo should know the fate of such a reporter._

_Think I'll get into trouble?_

_I think he'll appreciate it._

Jr. grinned, _I think Ziggy will. _

_Ah the mechanical beast_, Albedo sent dreamily. _And he will take care of the situation the way you think?_

_Just wait Albedo, _Jr. laughed. _He'll learn to keep his mouth shut._

* * *

A/N: Yay! CX A strange chapter, I'll admit but oh well. Just one more chapter left. ): Whatever will I do with all my free time? XD


	40. Home

A/N: Alright, I'm sure you all are staring at your inboxes like 'Wtf just happened'? B/c I had said one chapter. But this story writes itself as I've said so many times before and it just wouldn't die *cough* I mean end. I'm a little unsure of the ending but again, this story's been crazy. XD I hope you all enjoy these next three chapters and they're last. Or the last official ones anyway. We've still got questions to answer. C:

I do not own Xenosaga or it's characters.

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 40  
Home

Gaignun's medicine made him weak and tired often which worried Jr.

"I'm fine," Gaignun said through dropping eyelids and shallow breaths. "This is just a rest. Haven't you been begging me to take breaks?"

Jr. made a face and crossed his arms. "A real rest not a medicated one."

"Take it or leave it," Gaignun whispered, closing his eyes as sleep overwhelmed him.

Jr. sighed and got up from his chair to worriedly rub his arm, needing to touch him as if he'd be able to physically hold him back if he suddenly decided to die on him.

"I'll take it but I'm not gonna be happy about it."

It took a few more weeks of Jr. being both paranoid that Gaignun would disappear and happy that he was ok before his younger brother's body began to accept the medicine and the metallic replacements. He grew stronger, much to Jr.'s relief. Finally discharge day came around. Jr. sat reading when a nurse brought papers for his brother to sign. He was asleep so Jr. signed them for him, gave them back to her and waited for Gaignun to wake up.

_Excited, Rubedo? _Albedo asked curiously.

_Yep. We're finally getting out of this dump and off this planet. I can't stand to be here anymore. I feel..._

_Trapped._

_Yep. _

_Then to this Foundation?_

_Hell yeah. _

_And what then?_

_Albedo_, Jr. laughed, _You don't always have to have a plan. But I'm not letting Gaignun go straight back to work. Vacation time._

Albedo was having difficulty understanding the concept of vacation. The idea of not having a definite plan seemed to unsettle him.

_I'll even take you to the beach, Albedo. Would you like that?_

A bubble of excitement flowed through him. _I'll take that as a yes then._

He looked over to his sleeping brother and sighed. Gaignun really needed to wake up.

_He has been asleep for hours._ Jr. complained.

_Soon he will awaken and we can leave, Rubedo._

Jr. pouted again at the figure. _Albedo? _

_Rubedo?_

_If I go somewhere can you stay here or do you literally have to follow my movements?_

Albedo thought about it for a moment before answering. _I believe that if we both concentrate such a feat would not be impossible. Where do you wish to go? _

_Well I wanted to go get something but you know how I hate to leave Gaignun alone._

_Death's advocate._ Albedo sighed.

_I want to wake him up but I don't want him to freak out if I'm gone and I want to know if something goes wrong...ah hell._

Jr. pulled out his communicator. The screen popped up and he began typing words onto the hoographic keyboard.

_I'll just have someone deliver it...I bet chaos isn't doing anything._

_Cupid is your slave?_

_Nope but I pay him better than the rest of the crew, way better. He can do some different things for me. He won't mind and I know Captain Matthews can live without him if I ask for something. _

_Was the man angry at such a boy? _

_Hm? You mean because he snuck out? Nah, no one gets mad a chaos._

Two hours later chaos walked quietly into the room carrying a box. He smiled kindly at Jr. as he entered and spoke softer than he usually did because Gaignun was still asleep.

"Jr., there is no cake in here but I certainly hope I haven't aided you in another prank without my knowledge."

"Well," Jr. said, standing up and taking the box from him, "You have. Sorry but thank you."

chaos shook his head.

_He knew all along._

_Yeah he did._ Jr. sent, opening the box. _He's my buddy though so he's not going to stop me either._

"You two are so very strange." chaos murmured. He waved goodbye and left.

_"You two.."_ Albedo said suspiciously.

_Yeah..._Jr. said. _Maybe he was talking about Gaignun and me._

_Maybe..._

Jr. looked in the box, happy with its contents. He pulled out the piñataleaving the other object in the box. He turned back to Gaignun and started toward the bed.

_Candy, Dragon?_

_Better!_

He flipped it over, looking for the button that would turn the contraption on. When he found it he brought it over to Gaignun's hospital bed. He pressed the button and instantly the pinata lifted itself to the ceiling, hovering over bed just waiting to be broken.

_This is one way to wake Nigredo from his slumber._

_The _only_ way to wake _'Nigredo' _from his slumber._

Albedo mimicked Jr.'s mischievous grin as the boy raised his gun and fired. A loud pop sounded and the entire piñata exploded, the contents of it splashing onto Gaignun and waking him up with a jerk.

"What the fuck?!" Gaignun shouted, surprising Albedo and making Jr. hold back laughter. Gaignun's eyes connected with Jr.'s. "Jr..!"

He looked down at himself to see just what was coating him. "Is this...pudding?!"

Jr. couldn't take it anymore. He laughed hysterically, holding his sides and crying. Albedo didn't get why it was necessarily that funny but he snickered as Jr. shook with crazed laughter.

"Gaignun..." Jr. said, trying to calm down. "Gaignun I'm sorry but it's discharge day. You can't just sleep. It's time to go."

Gaignun stared at him in shocked anger, "I can't leave covered in this!"

Jr. nodded, "Exactly. You'll have to take a bath."

Gaignun didn't respond. He continued to stare in disbelief at his older brother.

"What are you waiting for? Go on, go."

Gaignun placed his head in his hands, rubbing away a headache and sliding off the bed towards the room's bathroom. Jr. started to follow him but stopped.

_Rubedo?_ Albedo asked, curious as to why he didn't follow.

_Um...Albedo..._Jr. started, trying to figure out just how to word what he needed to ask. He didn't have to. Albedo sighed dramatically, pretending it bothered him but being just showy and exaggerated enough to let Jr. know it didn't.

_I'll leave you and Death alone to do whatever it is you do._

Jr. sighed and was about to thank him when he said:

_On one condition._

_...Yeah?_ Jr. asked hesitantly.

_Mon Précieux_, he laughed. _I only want you to wake me and read to me once your work is done. When you have time._

Jr. felt the gentle sliding of claws along his jaw and down his neck

He placed a hand against the imaginary hand. Albedo hadn't left their body in a long time but he had been right, he could still make Jr. feel him.

_Alright._ He said, rubbing his neck. _Deal. _

That seemed to please Albedo enough to make the feeling ebb and fall away with his presence as he fell into stasis.

_Later, Dragon._

* * *

Gaignun had just slipped into the tub when Jr. burst through the sliding door. Gaignun glared at him from his spot until finally Jr. said, "What?"

"What are you doing in here?" Gaignun asked, pulling pudding out of his hair and tossing it to the side where it made a sickening smack where it landed.

"Is there a word for pudding phobia?" Jr. asked, taking off his jacket.

"Kinetofayetophobia," Gaignun said calmly as he watched Jr. The boy paused for a moment, jacket half-way down his arms.

"Are you serious?" He laughed.

"Kinetofayetophobia, when translated, literally means: fear of moving food."

Jr. sighed and shook his head, a smile on his lips. "Did you just make that up?"

Gaignun shrugged, "Jangelaphobia: the fear of gelatin or gelatin-like substances."

"And you have this supposed phobia?"

"Maybe. If I do you're cruel for doing this to me again."

Jr. started to walk to the tub when Gaignun shook his head.

"What are you doing?"

"Uh...coming over there."

"You can't." Gaignun said. A disturbing expression crossed his face and Jr. suddenly became worried he stopped.

"Why?"

"Because I have mycroanthropophobia."

"What?"

"A fear of short people."

"Oh I know you didn't just say that!" Jr. screamed in mock anger.

He ran to the tub and jumped in fully-clothed on top of Gaignun.

"No! No! Get away from me!" Gaignun yelled, trying desperately to get the clinging boy out of the tub.

"Shut the hell up! You're in trouble!"

Gaignun grinned and tried to wriggle away but gave up.

"I was going to be nice and give you a bath and help you relax but there you go with your goddamn knowledge of stuff no one gives a fuck about."

"And here you are with your brute force to get your point across."

"I--" Jr. stammered, lost for words. He smacked Gaignun upside the head. "I--I--" he sighed and straightened up. "I jumped in here with all my clothes on."

Gaignun laughed hard and pulled him into a kiss. Jr. giggled against his lips. He pressed his forehead to Gaignun's and stared down at his bare chest, running a finger over the line of muscle. The man sighed at the action.

"Do you have extra clothes?"

Jr. nodded, "Yeah, Mary and Shelley brought some when you were out because they knew I wasn't coming back to get them."

Jr. continued to play his fingers along Gaignun's chest. Gaignun squirmed under the touch.

"Jr..." he said, biting his bottom lip. He let out a strangled sigh, "Um...you straddling me right now isn't really a good idea..."

Jr. smirked and leaned down until his lips were inches from Gaignun's. Hot breath ghosted along his lips as Jr. spoke, "Why's that?" He ran his fingers up Gaignun's neck and under his jaw.

"Don't like the attention, Daddy?"

Gaignun groaned and ran his hands under Jr.'s wet shirt, eager to feel soft skin. Jr.'s smirk grew and he flicked out his tongue to run against the younger man's lips.

"God, Jr."

"I told you that God was a good enough nickname." Jr. whispered, watching the way his fingers left goosebumps along his skin. "But you know what?"

"What?" Gaignun whimpered, his grip on the boy tightening.

"You're supposed to be taking a bath."

Gaignun's eyes widened, "What?"

Jr. grinned devilishly. "Yep. Bath time!"

He jumped out of the tub and poured soap onto a sponge. Gaignun blinked in disbelief. Jr. winked at him. "You tease. You terrible, horrible tease."

Jr. shrugged, "I'm a whore and you're a bastard. Oh and payback?"

He walked back over to Gaignun and rubbed the soap against his skin. "She's a bitch."

Jr. hummed to himself while he worked to scrub Gaignun free of his pudding while Gaignun actually pouted for a while much to Jr.'s absolute delight. Why hadn't he thought of doing that before? He finally stopped and relaxed into Jr.'s massage.

"Hey Gaignun, how's your back feel?"

"Fine."

Jr. nodded, still being careful of his spine. Gaignun noticed this and smiled. "Jr., the doctor said I was healed completely now. I walked in here, got in this tub by myself and I'll be able to climb back out of it. I'm ok. Don't worry."

Jr. nodded again, but he was lost in his own thoughts and wasn't really paying attention. Gaignun laughed and turned around sharply to face him. Jr. opened his mouth to say something angry when Gaignun grabbed him and pulled him back into the tub.

"I ought to kill you for what you did to me."

"Do it then." Jr. said, sticking out his tongue.

"Don't tempt me." Gaignun threatened playfully.

"I'm not finished." Jr. said, taking the opprotunity to run the sponge over Gaignun's chest and neck. "I'll never be able to take care of you the way you can me," he said suddenly.

Gaignun was surprised by that. "What makes you think that?"

"I'm too small. When you did this for me it was different. I feel like I'm not...I don't know..."

Gaignun placed another kiss on his forehead and ruffled his wet hair.

"You're really sweet, Jr."

"You're really going to die."

Gaignun grinned and remembered the cloth wrapped around Jr.'s fingers. He picked up his left hand. Jr. was confused at first but then realized what he was doing.

"Pick the right one this time."

Gaignun thought about it for a moment before finally pulling on the one wrapped around his little finger. It took longer because it was wet but when it finally came sliding off there was nothing there. Gaignun frowned. What exactly was he looking for? Jr. pulled back quickly and shook his head. "Only one now. Maybe another if you're good, now stay still."

After another thirty minutes and a large splash fight Gaignun decided he was clean and pressed until Jr. got out of the tub. Surprisingly Jr. didn't stick around to bother Gaignun more, instead running off to the main room. Gaignun shrugged and dried himself off. He started to get dressed. He had just wrapped a belt around his waist when Jr. barged back into the bathroom, dry and holding a box behind his back. Gaignun raised a black eyebrow at it. When Jr. didn't say anything or offer it to him he continued to pull his clothes. He was buttoning up the front of his suit when he finally asked, "What's in it, is it going to hurt, and why aren't you saying anything?"

"Close your eyes and get on your knees."

"What?"

"Just do it," Jr. sighed, impatient.

Gaignun obeyed out of curiosity. He heard Jr. open the box the minute he closed his eyes. He didn't have to wait long. He felt Jr. move in close and something thick wrap around his neck. His brow furrowed at the strange feeling and the small click he heard as Jr. pulled away. Something tugged on the thing around his neck and he opened his eyes. Jr. grinned wickedly at him, his eyes shining brightly in contrast with the dark scarlet of his wet hair. In his hand he held the end of a leash that Gaignun soon discovered was connect to a collar around his neck.

"What the..." Gaignun started. His hands moved to pull it off but Jr. tugged harder, pulling him forward and almost causing him to lose his balance.

"Bad kitty."

"Jr.!"

Jr. laughed, "Look, it even has your name on it."

Gaignun pulled on a green tag hanging from the collar. In large black letters it read 'Gaignun Kukai'.

'He's got to be kidding.'

_No he doesn't._

Jr. pulled on it again. _Little bitch boy, huh?_

"Gaignun Kukai Jr.! I'm going to--!" A particularly strong jerk sent him forward.

"Be a good little kitty-cat? Yeah that's what I thought."

Gaignun sighed. "Will you stop doing that?" He pushed himself up and stood up straight, staring down a Jr. That didn't phase the boy. Instead it made him grin and pull gently on the leash.

"Well? Let's get out of here."

"With this?" Gaignun asked, pointing to the collar.

Jr. nodded, "Come along, man-bitch."

Jr. took complete advantage of his hold over Gaignun. Every time the man reached up to unbuckle the collar Jr. gave a forceful tug that sent him stumbling to keep his balance. They were on their way out of the hospital room's doors when Gaignun's phone began to ring. A little confused he pulled the impossibly small object from out of his back pocket and pressed it to his ear.

"Hello?"

Jr. stopped in his playing to turn around to stare up at his captive.

"He did what?" Green eyes flicked over to bore into Jr.'s blue ones. He suddenly felt very small under that gaze. 'Oh shit.' Jr. thought.

"I understand I'm very sorry. I'll take care of it immediately." Gaignun said, clicking off the phone and placing it in his pocket, staring at Jr. the entire time. When Jr. couldn't not squirm under that gaze Gaignun finally spoke,  
"I just got a phone call from Juli Mizrahi."

'Shit.' Jr. shrugged, "So?"

"It seems that a certain reporter has been harassing her the past few weeks because he heard from you that she had information about us that I was too hurt to announce and you weren't allowed to."

Jr. fiddled with the leash slightly, "I still don't see why that's a big deal."

"Oh it wouldn't be and I would actually find it funny because frankly that woman needs to be bothered a bit considering the way she's been treating MOMO. The reason it is a big deal is because Ziggurat 8 was with her."

Jr. pretended not to know where this was going.

"The reporter, frustrated with a ungathered infromation, got a little too close to her and her 'daughter' and now he's in the hospital."

Jr. grinned, "How close is too close?"

Gaignun frowned at him, "Ziggy broke his jaw."

Jr. burst into laughter, dropping the leash and backing up a few steps. Gaignun crossed his arms and continued to glare but Jr. couldn't stop. Finally after his laughing fit was over he wipped his eyes and looked up at him.

"You planned this."

"Yep," Jr. answered, he walked over to retreive his dropped leash but Gaignun snatched it up and held it out of his reach.

"What?" Jr. whined, "He had to be punished somehow and I knew the old man wouldn't get into trouble, he's a bodyguard it's sort of his job to smash people."

Gaignun sighed and unbuckled his collar. "Jr..." he started.

"Fine here," Jr. said, holding out his left hand.

Gaignun shook his head, "No."

"What? What do you mean no?"

Swiftly Gaignun wrapped the collar around Jr.'s neck and tightened it.

"What--Gaignun?!"

He started to pull at it in order to get it off but Gaignun, with a wicked grin of his own, pulled on it hard enough to cause Jr. to hit the floor.

"Bad kitty."

Jr. pushed himself up, rubbing his forehead. "Damnit. Gaignun you moth-"

Another tug and Jr. stopped talking. His blood boiling with anger. Gaignun loved it.

"Look," Gaignun said, leaning over to pull on the tag, "It even has my name on it."

Jr. glowered at him as Gaignun pulled the cloth away from his index finger. Nothing.

"Wrong," Jr. said, yanking his hand away angrily. "Pick the right one next time."

"Tell me what I'm looking for."

"Fuck you."

Gaignun rolled his eyes and straightened up, "Tell you what I won't punish you but you're going to have to wear a leash. If I don't restrain you you're likely to run away or shoot someone. What kind of father would I be if I just let something like that happen?"

"And that's what you're going to tell the press when the pictures of us like this show up."

Sometimes he loved how Jr. could read his mind. "Exactly."

* * *

Jr. wanted to cry at the sight of his broken Durandal. Gaignun ran a hand through his hair comfortingly. It was a devastating sight, such a powerful ship broken.

"We need to take it home," Jr. said, feeling strange. The Durandal was home. "We need to take it back to the Foundation and start repairs immediately."

"Can it operate on its own?"

Jr. shrugged, "It barely got us here so I doubt it. We'll have to drag it back."

Jr. stared in sad silence at the red mesh of twisted material. It barely even looked like their famous warship.

"It's alright, Jr." Gaignun said softly, "We'll rebuild it. It'll be as if it never happened."

Jr. shook his head, "No. This is something we can't forget. We have to keep in mind our fall so we can rebuild it stronger."

"You're right," Gaignun said, pleasantly surprised at the way he'd phrased it.

"Well," Jr. sighed, "I guess we'll hitch a ride on the Elsa. I bet they could tow what's left of the Durandal back."

Jr. pulled out his communicator and started giving orders to the Captain. When he was done and he'd placed the small contraption back into his pocket he looked one last time at the Durandal and sighed. "I think the name Miltia is a curse."

"I agree."

"It's a shame Helmer's wasted on a planet like this."

Gaignun chuckled, "You mean on a planet you hate. Not everyone hates this planet. The name Miltia is a curse for us only."

"You ruin my life."

"You make mine."

"Let's find the girls and get out of here."

"Good idea."

Gaignun tugged playfully on Jr.'s leash which earned him a half audible curse word.

_I love you too, Jr._

The ride on the Elsa was boring for Jr. he wasn't captain and therefore had nothing to do. True when he was there he usually took over for Captain Matthews but there was really no reason to do that when everything was going as smoothly as it was. So he played Hakox with Mary for a while, bothered Tony then Hammer, tried to start a fight with chaos and failed. He then got the brilliant idea to check up on what "that crackpot scientist is doing" and wished sorely that he hadn't.

Gaignun waited for him at the bar, Mary and Shelley on either side of him. They all looked up as he entered the room.

"Just what have you been up to Lil' Master?" Mary asked cheerfully.

"Wondering why we ever hired that senile scientist."

"The Professor is a very intelligent and experienced man, Little Master." Shelley answered.

"Intelligent and experienced my ass!" He yelled.

Gaignun shook his head, "Something happen?"

"Senility! That's what happened!"

Jr. walked over to the bar counter. Adonis seemed happy to see the Little Master and gave him his usual scotch. Jr. seemed a lot happier to have it in hand as he walked back to the table his family sat at. He propped his elbows onto the table, taking a sip of his drink and smiling.

"Gaignun," he sang, raising his glass. "Look what I've got."

"Alcohol," Gaignun observed.

"That's right Captain Obvious."

"You didn't want a mudslide?"

Jr. looked down at the caramel colored liquid in his glass. "Yeah but..."

He took a sip. _Matthews has taught Adonis a different way to make them. A weird way._

"Adonis' scotch is way better," he said loud enough for the droid to hear him.

"Oh I see," Gaignun said.

_That was strangely polite of you, Jr. _Gaignun sent.

"I like Adonis," Jr. smiled. He turned his attention to the girls.

"Hey Mary how do you feel?"

"I'm just fine now, Lil' Master. Nevah felt better."

"Yeah, you're a tough one," he said, winking and taking another sip. "Oh and Shelley!" he exclaimed, "I heard you gunned down a bastard!"

Shelley gave an elegant tilt of her head and said,"I did what was necessary to protect Mary."

"Aw, Shelley ain't you just the sweetest older sister? You know, Lil' Master, she's awful scary when she gets a hol' of a gun."

"As if you would know, Mary. Little Master, would you like us to leave you and Master Gaignun alone?"

Jr. shook his head, "No way. I've seen enough of that face for a while."

Gaignun held back a grin. Mary giggled and leaned over the table toward him.

"Just what have you and Master Gaignun been up to?"

Jr. shrugged and downed the last of his scotch.

"Things you're too young to hear about." He replied.

Shelley smiled, "Master Gaignun, Little Master has asked us to take a vacation. Until the repairs have been completed on the Durandal there will be no need for very much work and I agree with the young master's opinion. How do you feel, Master?"

"I'm not sure," he answered, "There are still things that need to be done and can be done to make things more efficient. If we stop or show any sort of lax in our work we could fall behind."

"You just got out of the hospital, Master Gaignun!" Mary said, "Ya cain't be doing all of this work. You need rest!"

"I'll be fine, Mary," he said gently, "But we can't allow ourselves to stay so vulnerable-"

"-shut the fuck up, Gaignun," Jr. said. He had another glass of scotch in his hand. No one at the table had even noticed his absence.

"I'm the Durandal. I'm the Foundation. I'm the oldest and I say vacation time."

Gaignun started to protest but Jr. held up his hand to silence him. "Haven't had a vacation in eight years." He took a sip, "We're not weak. The Foundation is heavily armed and I doubt anyone would want to attack us right now anyway. Then again, no one's ever needed an entirely valid reason for doing so. It won't hurt you to take one week off. You need it. I need it. The girls need it. Jesus needs it."

"Jesus?" Gaignun chuckled.

Jr. nodded, "He's getting tired of me almost dying. He thinks I'm a tease."

_You are._

Jr. pointed at him. "You need to shut up and do as I say."

"Fine, Jr." Gaignun said, giving in. Apparently Jr. was going to take charge.

"I'll get started on organizing a new crew. Mary, Shelley, I need you two to hand in any old resumes we have on file and order new 100-series. Tell the lab that we won't need the 100-series right away, but to keep at least twenty-four or more for us so that we can have at least that many once the Durandal's mainframe is up again. We'll need more later, but that's fine for now. I want those resumes tomorrow though and if there are any places that could recommend crew members that would be great. Understand?"

"Yes, Little Master."

"Gotcha, Lil' Master."

"Sweet." Jr. grinned, "See Gaignun? Everyone here listens to me. What's wrong with you?"

Gaignun chuckled and leaned forward. "Well then what would you have me do, 'Little Master'?"

" 'Ey! Little Master! We're here." Captain Matthews shouted over the intercom.

"Alright then ladies," Jr. said, motioning them to leave. Mary giggled and walked away, waiting for her sister to catch up with her before leaving together. Jr. threw back the rest of the scotch. He smiled at Gaignun who raised an eyebrow at him.

"You," he said, "Are going to take me to dinner."

"I am, am I?"

"You am," he said mockingly.

Gaignun sighed and slid his way out of the booth. When he reached Jr. he twirled the leash in his hands slowly.

"Don't do it," Jr. said, hands going to the collar he'd forgotten all about.

"Now Jr., how will you ever learn your lesson?"

Gaignun clipped the leash to the collar. He was surprised when the smaller man didn't fight him.

"If you think this makes me submissive, you're very, very mistaken."

"Really? How interesting and what makes you say that?"

"I might be a bad kitty," Jr. smirked, walking a little to put some strain in the leash, "but you're pussy whipped."

* * *

Gaignun couldn't remember the last time he'd been in his house. In his actual house. The Lost Jerusalem brick structure stood proudly on the away from the city sectors. The mansion was enormous and ridiculous for the simple fact that neither Jr. or Gaignun ever used it. There were countless room and wings, the building itself could probably hold the Foundation's people comfortably. Jr. never liked the size but Gaignun had. He liked space and a lot of it and when younger, enjoyed the freedom to go into whatever room he wanted or to just lounge in a room by himself. So much privacy and then again none at all. Gaignun glanced down at Jr. as they walked through the front doors. He'd never minded Jr.'s prying though.

_Wouldn't have minded me crawling into your bed either, huh?_

Gaignun pulled harshly on the leash.

_Bad kitty. _

He bent down to unhook it, making sure Jr. kept his collar on. "This collar is really big," Gaignun commented, "How long is it?"

Jr. shrugged, "How the hell should I know and what do you care?"

"Just curious," he answered. He straightened up to look around. The mansion was decorated in shades of deep blues and golds. The floor shone a strange clear color as if it were made of glass, reflecting a lighter version of dark blue walls. Everything glistened and shone brightly. It made everything feel surreal. Gaignun decided he didn't like it. They would have to have someone redecorate. Jr. didn't seem to care at all about the scenery or the way anything appeared.

"Damn, I don't remember which room is mine. Do we even have clothes here? Don't tell me we'll have to go shopping. Are the girls busy because I seriously don't want to go anywhere."

"I thought you wanted to eat."

"I do," Jr. sighed, scratching his head and furrowing his brow at his surroundings. He felt like a stranger and didn't like it. Gaignun could sympathize.

"Well," he said, beginning his way up the clear steps. "Where would you like to eat?"

Jr. sighed, still disturbed by his surroundings. "Some place expensive with menus only Albedo can read and a ridiculous code that makes me dress as stupid as you."

"That sounds wonderful," Gaignun chuckled.

"It should," Jr. said, following Gaignun to where ever he was going and running his eyes around a house that he was certain wasn't his.

"If you want, you can go ahead and call Mary and Shelley. They shouldn't be here for a while. Ask them nicely if they will bring you something on their way home."

The word home didn't sound right in describing this place.

"What about you?"

Gaignun shrugged. "I think I have something here...I'm pretty sure I do and I think it might still fit. If not I have no adverse feelings about going to pick something up."

"Well I do," Jr. muttered, pulling out his connection gear to call Mary.

Gaignun heard him talking politely with her while he searched rooms, trying to decide which one would be his tonight. He couldn't exactly remember one that had ever been really his. Had his memory slipped that far or had this place been so unmemorable that it was blank?

_Blank_, Jr. sent.

Gaignun walked down corridors and up another flight of stairs, opening doors and trying to map out the mansion. He could hear Jr. laughing and talking behind him and tried to keep within earshot in case he couldn't remember just how he had gotten to where ever he'd gotten to when he finally reached a room he liked. The walls were painted in a soft biege color, the carpet a dark maroon. Directly across from them sat a large window a balcony visible through maroon curtains. A soft window seat sat in front of it. The headboard of a large bed was pressed against the right wall and across from it was small bookshelf a few feet away from a large black piano. Gaignun entered the room, wondering why the rest of the house didn't give him this feeling of comfort. A large grandfather clock near a sliding door that Gaignun assumed lead to the bathroom announded that it was 6:45. Not too late.

"Shelley said she called ahead while we were in the hospital and had clothes delievered and put in a room..." Jr. started, "That looks just like this."

Gaignun walked over to the piano, sliding his fingers across the pearl-white keys.

"Those girls think of everything," Gaignun murmured.

He heard a soft thud and turned his head to see Jr. rolling around on the nicely made bed.

"God," he sighed, rolling onto his back, "It's so great to be able to lie on a bed. A real one instead of that uncomfortable hospital mess. Gaignun," he said, motioning him over. "Feel this."

"Is this a trick? Some practical joke where pudding falls out of the canopy of this soft bed and ruins everything?"

Jr. grinned evilly and toyed with the tag on his collar. "Maybe. Wanna take that chance?"

"Not really." Gaignun said but he walked over to the bed anyway and rubbed his palms against the fabric. "Huh," he answered.

"I know, right? It's great."

"It is."

Jr. sighed again and closed his eyes, "I change my mind. I think that I can go hungry if it means I never have to move from this bed."

Gaignun laughed, "No, you never turn down food. Now get up and get dressed."

Gaignun straightened himself up and searched along the walls for the button that would slide a portion of it open. Finally he found it. The wall slid open and onto a closet of clothes for both of them. He shuffled through them.

"Mmm, how about this," Jr. said, snuggling up to a pillow that was just his size. "You find something and I'll stay curled up over here and pretend like I care."

Gaignun chuckled. "Jr., do you know how to put on a tuxedo?"

"Do you know that I don't care how to do it the proper way?"

"Jr," Gaignun said, pulling one out for him and a smaller one for Jr. "Come here and let me put this on you."

Jr. sighed again out of frustration rather than comfort, sliding away from his soft bed.

"Ok. Monkey suit time."

Gaignun resisted the urge to tell him how cute he looked in the suit, knowing that would probably start a fight. So instead he told him how handsome he was and still got a smart remark but not necessarily an angry one. He pulled on a scarlet waistcoat over his collar white shirt and his black jacket over it. He paused for a moment, playing with his cufflinks.

"Something wrong?" Jr. asked, noticing the serious contemplative look on his brother's face.

"No...it's just..." Gaignun looked down at him. Everything was so perfect, so unbelievably perfect. Dmitri was gone, Albedo wasn't a threat anymore, and Jr. was happy and perfectly healthy and he was real. Jr. blinked blue eyes innocently at him, sending a warm feeling through his chest.

"It's just that I think I'm actually hungry for once."

That seemed to make Jr. extremely happy. He ran to Gaignun and grabbed his hand excitedly.

"Then what the hell are we waiting for? Let's get out of here!"

* * *

A/N: One order of the triad down. :0 Two more to go. For those of you who have a phobia of endings, please do not press the button. Everyone else may click away!


	41. Nocturne

A/N: I had promised Tuahla last weekend that it would be Sunday that I updated but this chapter turned into three and so I apologize and dedicate this chapter to you and to you too, Ganon XD. Congrats on your first day of college! I'm so proud of you!

**Aiselne Phoenix Nocturnus:** Thank you so much for your string of reviews. They have not bothered me one bit. Instead it has made me feel like a kid on Chirstmas. What's the review gonna say? :0 So thank you.

Warning: This chapter is waaay too long and has a terrible lemon. At least I tried. XD

I still do not own Xenosaga or its characters so nothing's changed since last chapter and won't be any different next either.. XD

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 41  
Nocturne

"Ugh, Gaignun really?"

"Yes Jr., I'm quite serious."

"I wish you weren't so damn serious. This is fucking stupid."

"And are you learning your lesson? Are you going to be a good kitty?"

An angry noise erupted from him and Gaignun wondered if he should label himself as a sadist because the sound always brought a smile to his face.

"Defiant," he said.

"Always."

"Gaignun," Jr. sighed, placing his elbows on the cream colored tablecloth beneath him.

"Jr." He answered and as Jr. proceeded to threaten him he wondered if he should be slapped with a linguist label too because he was so very fluent in Jr.

"Listen here, you bastard." Meant: "Please listen, Gaignun."

"I'm tired of this shit." Meant: "I really don't like this collar."

"And if you think I'm going to keep wearing it then you're sadly mistaken." Meant: "Let me take it off, it's embarrassing."

"I didn't buy it so you could drag me around like I'm some kind of child prostitute." Meant: "We're probably going to get into trouble for this. Besides it's your collar, not mine."

"And if you pull on that damn leash one more time I'm going to kill you." Meant: "And if you pull on that damn leash one more time I'm going to kill you."

_Stop doing that._

Gaignun smiled, "If you were anyone else I might take such a threat seriously."

"You should take every single threat I make seriously!" Jr. yelled, uncaring of the other people in the restaurant. It was for this reason that Gaignun had deliberately taken a table that was almost completely secluded from the rest of the customers. The light was dim and cast the cream decor into shadow.

"Well I don't," Gaignun laughed, "What are you going to do about it?"

He tugged on the leash gently, only enough to brush against the green tag but enough to upset Jr. A low growl escaped Jr.'s throat as his eyes flicked to something behind Gaignun.

_Nothing, our waitress is here._

Gaignun loosened his hold on the leash and allowed Jr. to sit back down in his chair on his knees.

_You're going to get your tux dirty if you sit like that._

_You're going to shut up._

An impossibly thin waitress came walking towards them. She wore a red apron over her white shirt and black skirt and her short brown hair was pulled back into a ponytail. She walked writing on a small pad, oblivious to the world, even running into another waiter on the way to their table. Her face was flushed and she seemed thoroughly upset when she finally reached their table.

_What a piece of work._ Jr. sent, observing the pale girl.

_Jr., be nice._

She pushed a strand of brown hair out of her face and without looking up began to talk.

"He-hello, my name is Becca and I'll be your server tonight. Would you like to start off with some..."

Jr. snickered as she raised her eyes and finally realized who she was talking to. If her face had been flushed before it was on fire now. She seemed at a loss for words which made Jr.'s smirk evil as he leaned back on the table. Gaignun reminded Jr. again to behave himself and smiled warmly at her.

"Hello, Becca," Gaignun started, "Are you alright?"

She snapped out of her trance and nodded furiously. "I-I um..."

"Star struck, right? Happens a lot. So, you going to take our orders or what?" Jr. asked playfully.

_Jr., that's a little rude._

_Your mom's rude._

Gaignun sighed and placed his hand in his forehead at such a ridiculous statement. The action worried the waitress, thinking her poor conduct was causing his frustration. Jr. must have noticed because he shook his head.

"Don't worry about Gaignun. Thinking is really hard for him and tires him out very easily. He's just got another headache."

Jr. felt a tug on his leash and gritted his teeth.

_Dammit Gaignun._

"I'm sorry Master Kukai," she said quietly, "I could bring you some medicine."

Gaignun smiled, "No, no. My son's the source of my headache and unfortunately I'm stuck with him."

Jr. stuck his tongue out at him, making her giggle.

"So um..." she started again. She reached into her apron and pulled out two menus but Jr. waved at her to stop. "Nah, we don't need menus. We come here a lot."

She nodded foolishly and slid them back in.

"Then shall I take your orders?"

She turned to Gaignun, expecting him to order for his son but it was Jr. who spoke up, grinning at her reaction.

"Well, I really don't want an appetizer but Gaignun over there will probably want a salad because he's watching his weight like a little school girl, no offense."

"None taken," Gaignun replied.

"I was talking to her, not you."

"And I was talking to you."

She tried not to giggle again.

"A salad does sound good. I'll have hm...Coquilles St. Jaques. It's been a while since I've had anything like that."

"And I'll have canard a l'orange."

_That's a lot of food, Jr. You'll make yourself sick._

_And that's not enough for you, you'll starve. Besides I'm eating for two now._

_I'm almost one-hundred percent certain that I didn't get you pregnant._

_Well you're almost one-hundred percent wrong. You're the one who put this thing inside of me._

Gaignun was about to tell him all of the things wrong with that statement when the small voice of their waitress caught his attention.

"I'm sorry," Gaignun said politely in his smooth voice, "could you repeat that?"

"Uh...um...would you like some wine, Master Kukai?"

Gaignun sat back in his chair for a moment, "Hm...what do you recommend?"

"Oh well I..." she blushed and tried to shrink behind her pad, "I don't usually drink, Master Kukai but a lot of our customer, I-I mean customers really like our Cote du Rhone."

Gaignun nodded, "That'll be fine then and please, Gaignun's fine. You don't have to call me Kukai"

She nodded nervously and stuttered out, "Yes, Master Gai--Master Gaignun."

_Man, Gaignun. You're going to give her a heartattack if you keep flirting with her like that._

_I'm flirting? _Gaignun asked.

Jr. shook his head, _You're so used to it by now you can't even tell._

_Hm..._

She jotted it down in her notebook quickly and turned to Jr. "And for the Little Master?"

"Just water," he shrugged, "I'm not allowed to have anything fun, am I Gaignun?"

The statement earned him a grin as the waitress finished writing the last of it onto her pad. "Anything else...?"

Jr. didn't like the way she was staring at him. She must have been prone to spacing out because she was doing it again. He followed the line of her eyes and discovered she was staring at his collar. Gaignun suppressed a chuckle and pulled on the leash.

"Like it?"

She shook herself out of another trance, "I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to stare."

Jr. shrugged, "You're not the first person. My father thinks I need to be restrained so I won't go off killing people."

"Because of what that reporter said? That was terrible of him. I know Master Gaignun would never do anything to harm you."

Jr. rolled his eyes, "Yeah unless this counts."

The leash pulled on the collar again and Jr. made an upset noise.

"Jr.'s going to have to learn his manners all over again." Gaignun said, tugging on the collar.

"Excuse me, Master Gaignun, but that doesn't seem like a normal child leash."

"Of course not it's more humiliating this way." Jr. said.

She giggled, and said hesitantly, "You two seem more like brothers than father and son the way you tease each other."

Jr. smirked. "I like you. Your name was Becca, right?"

She nodded stiffly. "Well thank you, Becca. You've been very kind."

"I-I'll be right back with your drinks," she whispered, eager to both get away before she did something stupid and to actually get their drinks. She had other customers too... She started to leave but wasn't paying attention and backed right into another waiter before collecting herself and walking back to the kitchen.

"Wow, Gaignun. How do you do that?" Jr. laughed.

"I didn't do it. You're the one who backed her into that last waiter."

Jr. smirked. "What? You think she's got a thing for me? I'm both four years younger and eight older than her I bet."

Gaignun shrugged, "Does my finding you appealing make me a pedophile?"

"No but it's different because when you look at me you don't see a little boy."

"Maybe she's not attracted to your body but your personality."

"That still causes problems and are you trying to give me away?"

Gaignun grinned, "No, never."

"Good. I know I'm hot. I don't need a little girl fawning over me to tell me. That's what you're for."

Gaignun chuckled and was tempted to reach across and kiss him. Jr. noticed this and laughed.

"If you weren't my son..."

"If I weren't your brother-son."

"Brother hasn't stopped me."

"Would it? I mean if everyone knew, would it stop you then?"

Gaignun thought about it for a moment, really thought about it.

"Well I'm unsure. I suppose that if the fact that we are what we are ever got out I'd just go ahead and let everyone know. Would it really matter at that point? Most people would have already rejected us by then."

"Good point."

"What about you? What would you do?"

Jr. propped his elbows on the table again and rested a chin in one of his palms. "I wouldn't care, I've never really cared. Go ahead tell everyone if you want, whatever makes you happy."

"Keeping you makes me happy and if that means keeping up this charade then I'm fine with it. We'll be careful."

"Really?" Jr. said, indicating the leash. Gaignun laughed.

"It's punishment, but I'll take it off of you when we get home."

"Damn right you will,"

The waitress returned with their drinks and carefully placed them on the table. Gaignun could tell she was nervous by the quick movements she was making and wondered for a moment if he really did have that affect on her or if it was Jr. She poured Gaignun's drink and pulled back, bowing at their thanks. She was about to leave when she stopped.

"Um...excuse me, Little Master?"

"Hm?" Jr. asked, turning to face her.

"I see that you're having trouble reaching the table..."

Gaignun sighed, knowing this probably wasn't going to end well. He prayed the words 'booster seat' wouldn't come up.

"You know," she continued, "I'm pretty short too and the tables are tall so people like Master Gaignun can be the only real comfortable ones and I um...I have a chair that's just like these except it's raised a little higher to even the balance."

She fiddled with her fingers, probably afraid Jr. was going to yell at her but she kept talking, "Would you like to use it?"

_Jr.?_Gaignun sent, waiting to see what he was going to say. Surprisingly Jr. smiled and nodded.

"Hey yeah, that'd be great."

She smiled, "O-okay, I'll be right back."

"That was strange," Gaignun commented.

"Really? She was nice about it and she didn't try to give me a booster seat."

"True."

The waitress came back with the chair and exchanged it for Jr.'s, leaving the two alone. The minute she was gone Gaignun took Jr.'s glass of water and dumped onto a nearby plant. He filled it with the bottle of wine and handed it back to him.

"Here Jr., take your medicine."

"Fucking awesome," Jr. said, grabbing the glass and taking a sip. "Have I told you I love you today because I totally do...but just for today. I'll hate you again tomorrow."

"I would expect nothing less."

Jr. smiled, "But hey, since you gave me some of this delicious wine..."

Jr. held out his left hand, "Pick the right one this time."

"I'm not sure if I like this game," Gaignun said as he pulled the cloth away from Jr.'s middle finger. Nothing again. Jr. shook his head and pulled his hand back.

"Pick the right one next time."

"What am I looking for, Jr.?"

Jr. didn't answer. "Well if I pull off the last one and nothing is there I'm not going to be happy with you."

Jr. shrugged, "When have I ever cared if you were happy with me?"

Gaignun sighed and took a sip, enjoying the sweet harmony of tastes.

Jr. swirled the liquid around in his glass, "Hey Gaignun?"

"Hm?"

"Why did they stop playing?"

"Who?"

"Didn't you hear it? The piano. Someone's been playing piano."

Gaignun looked around, "I haven't heard anything."

"Really? Huh...that's weird."

Gaignun frowned, "Is Albedo awake? Is he doing something to you?"

Gaignun felt down their link for him but found nothing. Jr. shook his head.

"No, I'm pretty sure I heard music."

Becca walked past their table and Jr. caught her arm, startling her and making her yelp.

"I'm sorry," Jr. said, surprised.

She shook her head. "No, sorry I'm just weird. You need something Little Master?"

"Oh, no but I was wondering why the piano stopped playing."

"Oh, the piano? Our pianist left early."

"Hah! Told you Gaignun!" Jr. said, letting her go. "I told you I heard music."

Gaignun sighed, relieved that he'd just tuned it out. He turned to the waitress and thanked her.

"Well there you go," Jr. said, drinking the last of his wine before anyone noticed it. "I'm not crazy. You're just unobservant."

"To anything but you," Gaignun responded, "In fact I'm not supposed to focus on anything but you."

"And that's why you're life is so entertaining."

"I'm curious though, Jr." Gaignun said, "I thought you didn't like piano."

"No, I like it. I mean..." Jr. shrugged, "I didn't like to hear it at all for a while because of Sakura but I fell in love with that one at the party last year and never looked back."

Jr. winked at him and Gaignun shook his head. "Yes, I remember that."

"I really liked the song playing though. I can't remember what it was. Do you remember?"

"All I remember," Gaignun said, motioning towards the approaching waitress.

_Is that you were drunk and that we almost got into serious trouble._

_But you like trouble._ Jr. sent, talking pleasantly with the waitress, who blushed and almost dropped their food in response.

_I love it._

They ate happily, talking about random things and laughing about topics no one else could hear, let alone understand. Jr. tried to get Gaignun to take some of his food while Gaignun tried to get Jr. to at least try scallops just this once because he knew he'd like them. Of course Jr. told him to shut up and flicked slices of orange at him. Gaignun gave him one more glass of wine and cut him off. Jr. could hold his liquor, but Gaignun didn't want him stumbling around the resturant drunk. Gaignun finished his food and stared at Jr. who hadn't made it half-way through his duck, which was strange because Jr. was usually a very good eater.

"Feel sick?"

Jr. shook his head. "Nah, I guess I wasn't as hungry as I thought."

Gaignun could feel something was bothering him though. He leaned over the table towards him.

_Something wrong, Jr.?_

_I'm not sure._ Jr. said honestly. _I feel kind of sad all of a sudden._

Worry filled the mental space between them.

_It's ok. You didn't do anything, Gaignun._

Jr. felt Gaignun's hand against his cheek and smiled, "Hey, none of that."

Jr. pushed himself out of the chair. "I'm going to go outside for a minute."

"Do you have your guns with you?"

Jr. laughed, "The bad guy's part of me now. I don't think you've got anything to worry about."

He started to go but got snagged on the leash. He made a noise and unhooked it before going outside. Gaignun frowned, wondering what was bothering Jr. so much.

"Oh, where's the Little Master off to?"

Gaignun snapped out of his musings to face the waitress. He must have seemed sad because she asked, "Is everything alright Master Gaignun? Is there something I can get for you?"

"No, no. Jr.'s ok he just..." Gaignun stopped for a moment, an idea forming in his mind. He wasn't sure if it would make things better but he could give it a try. "Actually, there is something I would like to ask of you."

* * *

Jr. really was having a hard time figuring out exactly why he was so sad. It didn't make sense. Everything was fine, perfect even. He was just being ridiculous. He couldn't believe that after all of this time Sakura's name still bothered him. He shrugged it off. A lot of stuff had just happened and Albedo had always been an emotional mess so those things combined were probably what was making him so vulnerable...

Jr. sighed. No, it was still Sakura. Damn that piano. Every time a note played on the instrument it brought back old painful memories which only intensified thanks to Albedo's mind. He wondered silently if he should wake him up just to talk to him for a few moments. He didn't want to tell Gaignun that he was still thinking about a dead girl after all of this. However, concerning Albedo's hatred for her it probably wasn't a good idea. Gaignun wouldn't care would he? He'd probably want to talk to him about it if he really needed to. He leaned his back against the entrance to the restaurant. He was being childish. Sakura was gone and that wasn't going to change. It hadn't bothered him the last time he'd heard a piano. Maybe it was because he was drunk. It had been so beautiful though and different, nothing like Sakura's. It had been sad, a beautiful kind of melancholy. Soft staccato plucks. One two three...one two three...one two...

Jr. blinked, he could hear it again. It was playing. He looked back to the door. The pianst must have come back. Jr. followed the sound to the door. It was strangely quiet in the resturant, like everything had stopped except for that flow of music. No one moved a fork, no one lifted a glass, even the people at the front desk were gone. A waiter was walking past him so Jr. stopped him.

"Excuse me, but where is everyone?"

"Little Master, what a pleasant surprise," he said excited, "Master Kukai's playing the piano."

"Gaignun?"

Jr. followed the waiter to where the music was coming from when Becca found him.

"Little Master," she said in her quiet voice, "Master Gaignun's playing."

"Yeah a waiter told me."

"Want me to take you to him?"

Jr.'s eyes scanned the dark restaurant until he found his brother. On a raised platform under a bright light Gaignun sat at the piano, his arms moving with the motion of his hands. The staccato plucks morphed into sweet legato. He blinked at the sound. He hadn't known Gaignun could play.

"Little Master?"

"No. I want to stay here, thank you."

Jr. moved away from her to a pillar and leaned against it to watch him play. A sharp twinge of sound slid as if from nowhere, crescendo from nothing and cutting off instantly a deep harmony. Notes twisted around each other perfectly and yet collided into each other drastically. Jr. tried to think and remember. When had Gaignun learned? He'd never left Gaignun alone long enough to learn how to play an entire instrument. He was always too busy...A painful rise and fall of certain note caught his attention as another answered. They cried to each other back and forth for a while until one rose above it suddenly. It moved swiftly, urgently, as if begging and commanding at the same time. The harmony was lost among it's frantic sound. It seemed as if the note itself were mad until it finally calmed down and dwindled into almost nonexistence, picking up it's earlier partnering notes again. They all spoke softly to one another, a comforting sound. Resolution. Then, slowly and quietly it repeated it's beginning, an apology, fading away softer and softer until it was nothing more than an echo. Even when it was done the final notes rung in Jr.'s mind. Gaignun's arms moved away from the keyboard, signaling the end. The room exploded in applause as Jr. released a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding. Gaignun smiled his practiced smile to the audience.

_Gaignun, that was beautiful._

Gaignun's smile dropped a little as he scanned the crowd for Jr.

_We're going home. _Jr. sent, finally catching Gaignun's eye. _You're in trouble._

* * *

"That was you?!"

"Jr..."

"No, that was you playing last year and you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't think it was impor--"

"Didn't think it was important?! That song's been haunting me forever and I briefly mention it for five seconds and you get up and play it?!"

"Jr. why are you so--"

"What else haven't you told me Gaignun? You kept your love a secret, your purpose, our dad! What? Is Helmer hiding in that six pack?"

"Jr. I do--"

"There's another Godwin sister isn't there?"

Gaignun laughed, realizing that Jr. wasn't serious. "Jr., that's rid--"

"It's the Becca girl. I knew she was too friendly with you!"

"She was just as friendly wi--"

Jr. pulled on his leash hard, dragging Gaignun with him up stairs and through corridors to their room. The door opened and slid shut behind them. Jr. continued to walk to the piano where he forced Gaignun to sit down on the piano's bench Gaignun blinked at him, waiting for Jr. to say something. It was fifteen minutes before Gaignun decided he'd try to.

"J--"

"Can you fly?"

"What?"

"I asked if you could fucking fly."

"I'm sorry, fly? As in superhero fantasy fly?"

"Fly Gaignun, as in take fucking flight. Fly. Sprout goddamn wings and take off."

"Now Jr. that's just si--"

"When?"

Gaignun chuckled. This reminded him of another inquisition.

"I started to play when I was about fourteen."

"How?"

"I learned in bits and pieces whenever time was available. Because I learned that way it took a long time. I was nineteen before I could actually play an entire song."

"Why?"

"For you."

Jr. crossed his arms. "Elaborate."

Gaignun sighed and pulled Jr. close, fumbling around in his pockets.

"Here we go."

He pulled a slim silver harmonica from one of his pockets and raised it up for him to see.

"Hey!" Jr. said, snatching it back a shoving it in his pocket.

Gaignun smiled, "You still carry that around with you everywhere you go."

"Yeah well..."

"She's the reason I learned. You loved her piano and after she was gone I could hear you playing that harmonica by yourself and it sounded lonley. I thought maybe if I could learn you wouldn't be so sad," He shook his head and pushed Jr. away. "But the day I actually finished a song, guess what you said?"

"That was the day I went on that 'I Hate Pianos' rant." Jr. guessed.

"The same day you and Helmer had that talk about personal space."

"How was I supposed to know that he--"

Gaignun raised a hand to silence him, "I know, I know. It's somehow all his fault and therefore none of your's. The point is that I made sure I never played around you. I started to realize that it wasn't her playing but just her actual presence that made you happy and decided it was foolish to risk bringing up past pains. I was asked to play piano at last year's party. I did out of courtesy and because you were supposed to be in another room. It was an accident that you even heard and once I discovered you were drunk I was more relieved than anything. Well, that is until you started screaming at me when I tried to make you leave."

"Well I loved that piano..." Jr. muttered.

"Of course you did."

"I never really hated pianos I was just mad," Jr. chuckled, "To think you would actually go to those lengths to keep me from being upset is crazy. But why did you play tonight? What's different?"

Gaignun shrugged. "You told me that how much you liked that song and you seemed upset. I thought it wouldn't hurt to give it a try. I've actually heard you trying to piece it together before.

"There's that one part that gets stuck in my head and it won't shut up."

"So it's a broken melody with your beautiful string of obscenities to fill in the gaps."

"Is that supposed to be an insult?"

"No, no," Gaignun said sweetly, "I think it's a gorgeous sound."

"Yeah, that's what I thought."

Jr. leaned against the old-fashioned Steinway and sighed. "Well did you know that you can play beautifully?"

"I've been told."

"You don't think you can, huh?"

Gaignun shrugged, "I'm an amateur at best as I really have no time to practice. I attribute all the applause and accolades with my fame and the willingness of the people to be able to respond positively to whatever I do. I'm sure I could paint a picture and it be nothing but stick people but the people would declare it a masterpiece."

"Well I think it was awesome and I'd tell you if it was bad, you know I would." Jr. said. He jerked his head slightly to the piano keys. "Play something else for me."

Gaignun cocked an eyebrow towards him. "You really want me to play?"

"No. I want you to just sit here and stare at me like an idiot."

"See now that makes sense becaus-"

Jr. grabbed his face in both hands. "Stop being stupid. Play for me."

Gaignun nodded and turned back to the piano keys, "But first," Gaignun said, turning back to Jr. He reached behind the boy's neck and unhooked the leash and collar from around his neck.

"Thank God," Jr. said as he watched Gaignun place it on the floor beside the piano.

The man stared down at the keyboard then as if waiting for something. Jr. walked over to sit on his left side.

"Well? Come on, Beethoven. Let's get a move on, Mozart."

Gaignun chuckled, a strange nervous sound as if he was unsure of what he was about to do. Jr. sighed. "Fine if you won't play..."

He ran his fingers along random notes, clashing into each other and making anything but music. Pure noise echoed throughout their bedroom. Gaignun laughed at him as he banged on the keys with his small hands until he finally quit.

"And that," Jr. said, crossing his arms. "Is how you play piano. Handel? Forget that guy. He's got nothing on me."

"And if such a wonderful composer can not even compare to you then I suppose I stand absolutely no chance."

Jr. smirked, "Damn right." Jr. pressed on a random key thoughtfully, "But see that's ok. I like amateur music."

He pressed on it again experimentally and then another. "So..." he said, placing a hand on Gaignun's and lifting it to the keyboard. "Show me how you would start."

Gaignun leaned down to whisper in his ear, "You're a smooth one, Jr."

"And you're a slow one," He pressed Gaignun's hand gently onto the keys, "Play."

Gaignun turned back to face the piano, his earlier anxiety gone. He tried to think of something appropriate to play. Something easy that he would be comfortable with but not so simple that it would be boring. Jr. was so easily distracted or impatient when he became bored. Finally he raised his hands to the keyboard, sliding them down to the higher keys. Jr. leaned over to watch him and Gaignun couldn't help but smile. Jr. began to wonder if he should be sitting where he was or if he should move when Gaignun's fingers hit the first harmony. It was sharp and gentle. Bursts of tinkling staccato like falling raindrops, causing ripples of rich harmony. A disconnected lullaby. Jr. listened to the sweet meloncholy melody as the harmony drifted into heavier tones, merging together perfectly. It was good. Hell, it was great. Jr. was almost sad when it seemed like it was finishing. It was too short. He would have to make Gaignun play another one. A strange twist of notes caught Jr.'s attention. An interlude? The music suddenly became powerful. Gaignun's fingers shifted farther down the piano, pressing down harder, repeating old measures and turning them into something new. The notes flew faster, eager, needy. A turmoil of notes crashing into each other in devastating waves. It was beautiful madness that devoured everything in its wake and wrapped it carefully around itself. Powerful booms blew apart the melody, forsaking it for the dark sound of harmony before stopping, subito piano. Jr. blinked out of his trance as music vibrated in the strings of the instrument. He looked up at Gaignun but he wasn't done. Tinkling notes arrived again, washing away the hurried vibrations that lingered and bringing back that strange sense of a lullaby. A broken lullaby. A sad lullaby. When Gaignun was finally finished he moved his hands down to the bench and turned his head towards Jr. as if waiting for some sort of reaction.

"You man-handled that piano," Jr. said softly, amazed.

Jr. decided that the smile on Gaignun's face was beautiful, almost child-like in his excitement. He kept the thought to himself though as Gaignun exhaled a breath at the comment.

"That," Gaignun laughed, "Has got to be the most meaningful compliment I've ever received."

Jr. nodded, "Yeah well, you're still not as good as me."

"Never," Gaignun said, leaning down to kiss him. "God, I love you."

Jr. smirked, "And I love you too, my son, but then again I love all things."

"You hate everything Jr., you could never be God."

"Well I love you more than Jesus. Does that count?"

"What? Jr.," Gaignun said, amused disbelief coating his speech. "That is ridiculous and besides, no one said he was ever in favor of bio-weapons. Not to mention bio-weapons of the same sex and DNA who sleep with each other."

"Psh. Whatever. I don't know what you're talking about. We're his favorite."

"I hope that's true."

Jr. was about to say that it didn't matter because they weren't going to die any time soon but froze. He wasn't going to. Gaignun only had a few years. Years that would fly by so fast he'd hardly realize it until it was over. The thought hit him hard but he tried not to show it, shoving it away so that Gaignun wouldn't be able to find it. Gaignun was beginning to wonder though because of the sudden shadow in his eyes but to keep him quiet and away from his thoughts Jr. held out his left hand. Gaignun looked down at the hand. Only one left.

"Pick the right one," Jr. laughed.

Gaignun reached down. "This better not be a prank, Jr."

"You better pick the right one, Gaignun or you fail and I win. How often does that happen?"

"Right," Gaignun said, pulling on it. "Let's stick to the same formula. Everything comes out better that way."

The cloth fell away and Gaignun found a strange marking on Jr.'s skin. Worried, he pulled it closer to his face in order to see it. It would be like Jr. to put him through this and show him some horrible scar or some silly little marking just to freak him out.

"Jr..." he whispered.

There, encircling the base of his ring finger in elegant black zaptino lettering was his name: Nigredo.

"Heh, not bad huh?"

Gaignun stared intently at it as if it weren't real. He ran a thumb over it, thinking to smear it but it didn't run.

"This is a tattoo." Gaignun stated dumbly, still in disbelief.

"You told me I should get one. I wasn't about to put it on my ass though. I thought, you know since you're a girl and all, that maybe you'd like this better."

"I...I do..." Gaignun said, "Jr..."

Jr.'s hand twisted out of Gaignun's grip and found it's way to his cheek.

Jr. pushed himself up onto his knees so that he could be closer to eye-level with his brother. "Just think of it as a welcome back present." He said, shrugging.

He leaned in their lips inches apart. "Welcome back, Nigredo. Gaignun."

Gaignun wrapped his arms tightly around Jr.'s small frame, capturing his lips tenderly.

"You drive me absolutely crazy," Gaignun whispered against his lips.

"That was my plan," Jr. said, smirking. Gaignun heard the lid to the keyboard slam shut. He grinned and pulled Jr. over, setting him on it and placing kisses along his neck. Jr. wrapped his arms round Gaignun's neck, keeping him close. "I love your plans."

"Yeah you do."

"Cocky."

_Stop talking. _Jr. sent, pulling the tie around Gaignun's neck to bring him close. His other hand began made quick work of the jacket of his tuxedo, sliding it off his shoulders and nipping at his neck.

_Jr..._Gaignun sent, shaking at the feeling of his tongue against his ear. _Don't you think we're moving a little fast?_

_What makes you say that? Don't want me all of a sudden? _Jr. pulled him closer, forcing Gaignun's body against his. He began to work on the red waistcoat next. Four buttons and it was open. He pulled it off and sliding it off and onto the floor.

_I just don't want you regretting anything. You've been through a lot._

Warm breath tickled along his neck as Jr. chuckled. _You're always so worried about me._

Gaignun felt the front of his shirt fall open as small hands glided across his skin.

_I can't help it. _

_Well what do you want, Gaignun? _Jr. bit down on the exposed skin of Gaignun's shoulder, running a hand up the back of his neck and entwining fingers in his black hair. Gaignun groaned at the action, trying to keep himself calm.

_I can stop if that's what you want. _He worked his small lips up his neck, sliding his hand down to trace the muscles on Gaignun's chest. He pulled back to stare into Gaignun's eyes.

"But I don't think that's what you want, is it?"

A devilish smile crossed Gaignun's lips. He stood up, kicking the bench behind him away. He bent over Jr., pinning him against the piano. _No. It's not._

Gaignun pulled off the suit of Jr.'s tux and threw it to the floor. He decided that he didn't like Jr. in a tux. Too many layers and buttons. He slid his hand down Jr.'s back slowly, running lips along his neck and causing him to arch into the other hand running along the boy's stomach. The feeling sent small shivers through him and he whimpered when Gaignun reached his growing erection, stroking him through his pants. Jr. bucked into the feeling, frustrated at his pinned position and the lack of motion he could make. Gaignun felt his frustration and leaned in to kiss him deeply, pressing his tongue against Jr.'s. Jr. squirmed.

_Gaignun, we've got to move._

_We do? _Gaignun replied, rubbing harder, smiling at the motion he got in response. _I like it here_.

_You won't. _Jr. sent, the message slurred as concentration became harder, which frustrated him even more. _You won't in a...little while...there's-there's not enough room._

Damn. Gaignun sighed, he was right. He wrapped the boy in his arms and lifted him away from the piano.

_You're so demanding_, Gaignun sent playfully.

He dropped Jr. carefully onto the bed. _Don't like being my flunky? _

_I love it._Gaignun pulled off the rest of their clothing. He leaned down over him, placing worshipful kisses on sinfully young skin, praising him for his absolute perfection. Jr. blushed at the thought but tried to keep it hidden. Deep emotion flowed down their link, back and forth, making Jr. shudder with the gravity of it all. It was getting to Jr., opening up something strange inside him and without thinking he sent, _I'm afraid._

Gaignun stopped instantly and looked up at him. "Of me? Jr., I-"

"No, Gaignun it's..." Jr. sighed and pushed himself up. "I'm afraid of losing you. You know...what am I supposed to do after...after you die? There's no way I could get through a day without us being stupid together. And..." Jr. ran a hand to caress Gaignun's neck, deliberately avoiding his eyes. "How in the hell will I be able to live without this ever again?"

Gaignun smiled down at him lovingly. "Jr., why are you so worried? I'm here now, isn't that what matters?"

"I never said that I wasn't grateful for that. I would've died along with you back there if you hadn't survived. I couldn't take it if another person died on me and...I can't do anything about your's..."

Jr. shook his head, "Not only that but who knows how long I'll have to live without you?"

"Jr.," Gaignun whispered, "Have you been holding this back from me?"

Jr. continued to dodge the younger man's gaze. "It's just scary Gaignun. Really scary."

Gaignun took Jr.'s hand away from his neck, planting a kiss on it before crawling over Jr. again. "Jr. I don't know what to say to make you feel better. Even though we've been through this before I'm not going to tell you it's a foolish fear because I'm sure I would be just as upset about it if I were you too but Jr..." Gaignun sighed,"I'm still young and so, hopefully, we have a good long time before you ever have to worry about that." He gave him a quick kiss. "And you'll always have Albedo."

"Stop saying that!" Jr. yelled, "I know I'll have him and I'm glad I will but I don't like to think of him as a substitute for you. That's outrageous!"

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry." Gaignun soothed, "I only meant that you won't be alone. He'll take care of you."

"But I'll still miss you. It'll still hurt. What if I can't take it?"

Gaignun placed his hand under Jr.'s chin to lift it to him but the boy jerked away from him.

"It'll hurt I won't lie, but you're strong and I know you'll be ok."

"But Gaignun..."

He reached out for Jr.'s chin again and this time the boy didn't fight him. "I love you, Jr. and that's never going to change, no matter where I am or what happens to me."

"That's not the problem. The problem is that I'll love you and you won't be here, stupid."

Gaignun smiled, "No I won't be here but no one said you had to stop loving me."

Jr. looked up at him. "I'll just be waiting for you. So that I can inform you ahead of time if we really are Jesus' favorites."

Jr. chuckled sadly, "Yeah. That's a good idea. Wouldn't want to go unprepared."

"No, no you wouldn't." Gaignun said. "I'll make sure the afterlife is perfect for you. Wouldn't want you disappointed when you got there."

"That's nice of you Gaignun," Jr. whispered.

"Only the best for you, Jr."

"You really are my flunkey."

Gaignun laughed, "And I really do love every moment of it."

"I love you," Jr. said shyly, unused to being so affectionate.

Gaignun's heart warmed at the strange sight of Jr.'s unusually emotional state. "I love you too."

"Good." Jr. reached up to pull Gaignun back down onto him.

_Now_, he sent. _Where were we?_

Gaignun smiled and leaned down to capture his lips again. He slipped his tongue into the boy's mouth, twisting his skillful tongue around his, making him whimper and fight back for dominance. Gaignun found the motion amusing. He wasn't going to let Jr. win. Jr. was thinking the exact opposite and wrapped arms around Gaignun's neck to deepen the kiss. Gaignun lifted Jr, placing a hand under his back to hold him close while the other played with the boy's nipple. Jr. arched into the touch, his moan muffled by Gaignun's mouth. He maintained his fight however until he felt Gaignun's large hands slid down his chest to his waist. Gaignun's fingers stopped to play with Jr.'s hips, causing the boy to tighten his hold in an attempt to stop the action trembling it caused. He continued to tease the boy, running his hand along his legs and thigh, teasing all the spots he knew would make Jr. beg. Finally Jr. gave up, throwing his head back against the small bits of pleasure. Gaignun smirked, nipping gently at the boy's small neck and lightly running nails down his back. Jr. whimpered at the feeling. He was tired of this!

"Damn it Gaignun if you don't stop fooling around I'm going to ki--Ah!" Jr. cried out as Gaignun's hand wrapped around his erection.

"You're going to what?" Gaignun whispered against his lips. He moved his hand slowly enjoying the way it made Jr. move and the flushed color of his skin. Jr. bucked eagerly into the hand, urging Gaignun to go faster. Gaignun deliberately slowed his movements, running his tongue over Jr.'s ear.

_No, Jr._Gaignun said huskily. _Be good._

_Gaignun this is torture! _Jr. shivered, trying desperately to keep his hips still.

_Ask nicely._Gaignun teased.

_You've got to be fucking kidding me._

_Hm...nope._Gaignun's thumb ran over the tip, earning him a needy moan that shook his resolve.

"Try again."

Jr. whimpered, "Please. Please, Gaignun."

_Good boy._

Gaignun pumped faster, tightening his grip and holding Jr. close. Jr. buried his head in Gaignun's shoulder, breathing heavily as occasional whimpers escaping his lips. He was getting close, Gaignun could feel it. _Not yet. _he sent.

_What? _Jr. asked, half-coherently. Gaignun placed the boy flat on his back.

"Gaignun," Jr. said, out of breath. "You are not going to leave me like this."

"No, no." Gaignun assured him, "I'm not mean like you."

He gave him a swift kiss, sliding his hand from his straining member to his entrance but then stopped. He didn't have any lubricant with him. Damn it.

"Wha-what's wrong?" Jr. groaned, Gaignun was really pushing it today.

"We didn't get any lubricant, Jr." Gaignun answered. Jr. made a face.

"So?"

"So?" Gaignun repeated as if what Jr. had said was quite stupid.

Jr. rolled his eyes, "I can take it dry."

"No you can't," Gaignun answered, "It will hurt you."

Jr. sighed in exasperation. He grabbed Gaignun's hand and brought it to his mouth. He slid his tongue around the digits, moistening them as best he could. Gaignun gulped at the erotic sight. "That's not going to be enough," Gaignun said, his voice hard. Jr. answered by sucking viciously on the fingers, making the man shiver. Jr. raised himself up, pushing Gaignun with him. He diligently worked on the fingers in his mouth. He lightly ran his other fingers down the length of Gaignun's cock in teasingly fleeting touches. He groaned, "Jr..."

_You're going to do what I say then, right?_

Gaignun didn't want to give in but Jr. tightened his grip and he nodded.

"Good." Jr. said, removing his mouth from around Gaignun's fingers. Jr. pulled Gaignun back down with him, kissing him furiously. Carefully Gaignun moved his fingers to Jr.'s entrance. He slid one finger in, then another, pausing whenever Jr. made a pained sound. He added a third, scissoring the opening, trying to stretch him without hurting him too much. Finally he removed his fingers. He seemed hesitant but Jr. kissed him again and said in the kindest way possible,"I'll be fine, stop being a girl and do it."

Gaignun made a face at him but complied and slowly entered his little lover. Jr. hissed at the initial pain but urged a worried Gaignun to keep going until he was completely sheathed inside him. Gaignun stopped then, running a hand through his red hair. "Are you ok, Jr.?"

"Yeah, move," he gasped, rolling his hips to meet Gaignun's.

The younger man groaned at the pleasure that pulsed through him and pushed back. He developed a slow, steady rhythm, searching for the bundle of nerves that would make Jr. forget the pain. It wasn't long until he found it. Jr. screamed for him, digging nails into his back and urging him faster. Gaignun obeyed, picking up the pace and pounding into his prostate every time, Jr.'s screams and writhing urging him on. Gaignun placed his hands on Jr.'s hips, pulling him up higher and sinking deeper into him.

"Aaaah! Gaignun!" Jr. cried, pressing back against him. "Harder!"

The sound of Jr.'s voice combined with his movements were driving him insane. He nodded, too dizzy from pleasure to hesitate. He pulled back, almost entirely out of Jr. before pressing back in hard and fast, burying himself completely in the tight heat of the boy. Gaignun's aim was perfect and it sent Jr. over the edge. He came, shouting a broken version of Gaignun's name. Jr.'s muscles clamped down on Gaignun, surprising him by sending a sharp electric euphoria through him. He gripped Jr.'s sides and gave a strangled cry as he came inside the boy.

They both paused for a few minutes, waiting for blurred vision to clear and breathing to shallow. Gaignun finally pulled out of the boy and tried to stand on weak legs, smiling down at his little lover who looked as if he were about to pass out. Exhausted blue eyes stared up at him.

"Wow," he breathed. "If Dmitri had been smart he would've tried seducing me. I never would have gotten away after that. I bet money I won't be able to walk tomorrow."

Gaignun laughed and moved to pick him Jr. up and carry them to the adjacent bathroom.

"If he had even thought about touching you I would've killed him."

"Where are we going?" Jr. asked sleepily, snuggling into Gaignun's chest.

"To clean up so you can sleep."

"What about you?"

Gaignun kissed the top of his forehead. "Only after you."

Gaignun walked in through the door and walked into the shower, Jr. in his arms and pressed the buttons. "Did I hurt you?" he asked softly as the water came out to wash over them.

"Yeah! That water's always so damn hot!"

Gaignun chuckled and fixed it to a temperature Jr. wouldn't complain about.

Gaignun looked around for soap, but couldn't find any. He set Jr. down, stepping out of the shower and ruffling through cabinets until he found some. "We could've used this," Gaignun sighed on his way back in. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"Well have long have you been sleeping with other dudes, Gaignun?"

Gaignun grinned and shook his head. He opened the bottle and poured some onto his hands, lathering the slippery substance on Jr. He fussed like a child, wriggling away from the clean hands.

"I can wash myself," Jr. snapped.

"I'm aware," Gaignun answered. "I'd just prefer you didn't."

"Well I don't care what you prefer," the variant replied. When Gaignun moved to rub soap onto his skin again though he didn't move and allowed the younger man to finish what he'd started. He relaxed into the gentle touches.

"Did I hurt you?" Gaignun asked again.

"Nah," he sighed, placing a quick kiss on Gaignun's nose. The gesture warmed Gaignun's heart. It was sweet. 'Must be afterglow'. Gaignun thought.

_I make you that insecure?_

_You make me wary. You're my only equal and the only person who makes me feel this way._

"I've missed you, Gaignun. Don't expect me to keep being this 'sweet' to you. Remember I told you at the restaurant that I'd hate you tomorrow."

"Yes," Gaignun said, amused. "I remember."

Gaignun finished washing off their skin and walked out of the shower to grab a towel and wrap one around his waist before wrapping Jr. in one and lifting him up again.

"I can walk," Jr. muttered.

"It might hurt and I'm unwilling to take that chance."

Gaignun laid Jr. back onto the bed tenderly and went to find the light switch. He found it against the wall by his bed and he pressed the button. The late night lights of the Foundation flickered in beautiful multicolored dots through the window. Gaignun sighed. He could get used to this. He started to walk toward the bed again when he heard Jr. whisper sleepily, "Watch out for the piano bench."

Too bad they both remembered it too late. It caught Gaignun's ankle and he fell to the floor. "You alright?" Jr. laughed.

"Yeah," Gaignun responded, laughing too. He pushed himself up but tripped over another leg and hit the floor again. Jr.'s laughter rang out again as Gaignun finally made his way back to the bed.

"Are you laughing at me, Gaignun Kukai Jr.?"

"Yes I am, Nigredo. What are you going to do about it?"

"Nothing," he sighed, sliding onto the bed. "I'm not going to do anything at all."

Gaignun didn't need the light to tell that Jr. was frowning. If Gaignun wasn't going to do anything about it then that meant he couldn't fight. Gaignun laughed at him. He thought back over what they had said earlier. "We can't not fight about anything can we?"

Jr. shook his head, the motion making ruffled sounds in the soft blanket they both were too tired to pull back and slid beneath.

"So who won?" Gaignun asked, teasing the small boy beside him.

"Me."

"You? Why?"

Jr. sighed as if it were the dumbest question he'd ever heard. "Because I got you to do what I wanted last. You got me at first, but you obeyed me."

Jr. crawled over to him in the darkness, placing his left hand on his chest. "Good kitty," he said, patting tiredly. Gaignun picked up the hand and placed a kiss against it. His finger ran across Jr.'s new tattoo. "Do you favor your left side?" Gaignun asked suddenly,"Your earring, your tattoos...they're all on that side."

"On Lost Jerusalem a pierced right ear was the symbol for 'I'm gay'. Your name went on my ring finger, you know like if we were getting married, stupid. The dragon? Eh. It just went there."

"So this is what you were doing. This is what Albedo didn't approve of?"

Jr. laughed, "Yeah. He was bitching the whole time."

"And you did it anyway?"

"Yeah. He's got eternity. You've got years. He can wait."

Gaignun nodded and placed a soft kiss on his forehead. He pulled off his towel, realizing it was soaking into the bed and pulled off Jr.'s too.

"Jr., do you want me to find you some clothes?"

"Are you wearing any?"

"No."

"Then no," Jr. said, snuggling up to him. "Because that's unfair."

"Good," Gaignun answered, drapping an arm around him to pull him close. "Because I really didn't want to get up."

Jr.'s laughter was tired as he placed his head on Gaignun's chest. "Yeah I'm kind of pretty much dead over here."

Gaignun shook his head, collected Jr. in his arms and pulled the blanket out from under him.

"This bed really is great," Gaignun sighed as he draped the blanket over them.

"Yeah the bed is great." Jr. said, closing his eyes, "But I'll never look at that piano the same again."

* * *

A/N: Sorry for this chapter's ridiculously long..ness and for the lemon. Maybe I'll get the hang of it one day. ;P


	42. Time

A/N: Shhh! I'll ruin the moment.

I do not own Xenosaga or its characters. Never have, never will. Happy Namco? Monolith Soft?

* * *

Conflicting Numbers  
Chapter 42  
Time

Jr. sleepily ran a hand through his hair and stretched, careful of the body under him. He blinked a little, trying to remember what had happened last night and once he remembered, broke every inch of his memory apart to make sure it hadn't been a dream. He pushed himself up in search of confirmation and found Gaignun still sleeping. That sent off alarm bells because he never woke up before Gaignun and the last time he had, discovered it to be Albedo instead. He stared at him a little longer before deciding that this really was his youngest brother before carefully finding his way out of bed. He winced as pain shot up through his spine. He sighed. Well he should have expected that. He made a mental note not to let Gaignun do that without lube again. He checked the ancient grandfather clock in their room and found it already ten o' clock. The Foundation was one of the few places in the universe that still delivered newspaper, let alone printed one and he'd been eagerly awaiting it to see just what the Foundation's interpretation of what had happened would be. He started toward the door but realized he was completely naked, sighed and grabbed the closest article of clothing. He stared at it for a moment before pulling on Gaignun's white collar shirt. He buttoned it, satisfied that it covered him to the knees. He frowned at the sleeves and rolled them up. It was too early in the morning for him to be adjusting things. He made it to the door and pulled it open. Well at least the paper had been delivered. He leaned against the door frame for a minute, half expecting the paper to make its way into his hand on its own and when it didn't he bent down to pick it up. He gave a small 'ow' at the pain. Why did he have to do everything? He straightened back up and leaned against the door frame again, and when he noticed that the lazy paper wasn't going to open itself up he started to shuffle through it.

"Jr.!"

The harsh sound of his name made him jump. He looked back in the foyer to see Gaignun stomping toward him. He yanked Jr. inside sharply, slamming the door shut behind him.

"Gaignun?" Jr. asked, confused. He hoped that this sudden action wouldn't wake Albedo from his silent sleep. He thought quickly of all the possible things he could have done already to make Gaignun mad. Gaignun frowned down at him and dropped to his knees to stare eye-level with him.

"What is it?" Jr. asked hesitantly.

"You have got to be more careful."

Well that was sort of a surprise. Maybe he meant walking outside in nothing but his shirt?

Gaignun shook his head at the thought and wrapped his left arm around his back, pulling him close. With his other hand he began unbuttoning the shirt. "This shirt," he whispered, hurrying to the last button, "Is swallowing you whole." He ran long fingers down Jr.'s bare skin, pulling the fabric down to reveal more.

"It's too dangerous for you to wear. You might get lost."

Jr. grinned. "You had me scared there for a minute."

"And you me. Dangerous, dangerous fabric."

Jr. wrapped arms around his neck and kissed him eagerly. "I've missed you." he whispered against his lips. Gaignun smiled and pulled him closer. A soft smack against the floor caught his attention. "The newspaper?"

Jr. nodded at it. "Yeah, I wanted to see what our own tabloids had to say about us."

"And?"

"And what the hell does it matter?" Jr. said, kissing him again.

"It doesn't," he responded. He picked the small boy up in his arms, kissing the exposed skin of his chest.

"Well Good mornin' there, Master Gaignun, Lil' Master."

_Shit._

Gaignun froze, covering Jr. with the unbuttoned shirt. "Good morning, Mary. How are you?"

"Not half as good as you two, Master Gaignun." She said, winking at them.

"Mary," Shelley scolded, but it was with a hint of amusement for their situation too. A naked Jr. and a half-naked Gaignun in nothing but boxers was pretty funny. Jr. buttoned his shirt hastily as Gaignun set him down carefully down onto his feet, his back turned to the girls so he could finish buttoning. Shelley handed a cup of coffee to Gaignun who took it thankfully.

"Would you like something too, Little Master?"

Jr. turned around, swagger regained. "Nah thanks. I'll just steal Gaignun's."

"I'm sure you will," Gaignun said, taking a sip. "If you can reach this high."

"I ought to shoot you," Jr. threatened, but remembered he didn't have his guns and sighed.

Mary giggled and bent down. "You look awfully cute in Master Gaignun's shirt, Lil' Master. Watcha got under there?"

"Heh. Wanna find out?"

"No, no she doesn't." Gaignun said. He leaned down to give Jr. his cup.

"Jealous?" Jr. asked down into his cup.

"You wish. Girls, I would like to thank you for setting up our room. It was perfect."

"I assumed it would be to your liking, Master Gaignun."

"Yeah!" Mary pipped up, "You haven't played piano in a long time so I thought if we put one in there you'd start playing again."

"That was your idea, Mary? Well thank you. It was splendid."

"So hey, Shelley. You get that stuff I asked you to?"

"Yes, Little Master. It's right behind me in the study."

"We have a study?" Jr. asked, looking up at Gaignun who shrugged.

"Now you two cain't just stand there 'an say that you ain't never been in that room."

"I'm not saying we haven't," Jr. replied, "We just don't have very clear memories of this place."

"The Durandal was a much better home." Shelley said.

"I dunno, Shelley. You and me and Master Gaignun all used to hang out here a lot. This was our first home after ya'll rescued us."

"Yeah," Jr. sighed, "But this place is just a big blur compared to all the stuff that happens on the Durandal. By the way, have repairs started or do I need to contact someone?"

"I called 'em and told 'em to get off their lazy butts, Lil' Master."

"Hah! Sweet! Thanks, Mary. You're the best."

She giggled. "Well girls," Jr. said, handing the coffee that was surprisingly more than half-way full back to his brother. "Take the day off. I've got it covered. Thanks for your work today and yesterday."

Mary saluted playfully. "No problem, Lil' Master. Let's go Shelley, we're gonna be late! We've got to hurry!"

"You two have plans?"

Shelley blushed,"None that are of any importance to you, Master."

"Oh ho ho, what's this? You got a date, Shelley?" Jr. joked.

"They are too!" Mary shouted. She turned her attention the the variants, "Shelley's meetin' someone today."

Gaignun smiled, "That's wonderful. Anyone we know?"

He felt Jr. tugging on his boxers and handed him the rest of the coffee.

Shelley was torn between lying to him or telling him the truth. Her sister wasn't, however and blurted out. "Yeah, she's goin' to go see chaos."

Jr. spit out his coffee, "chaos? My buddy chaos?"

Shelley nodded, "Yes, Little Master."

"That is so weird. Ow!" Jr. said, rubbing the back of his head.

_You didn't have to hit me. _

_I didn't hit you. Must've been a bird._

_What? A bird?!_

Shelley stood frozen, eyes away from Gaignun's gaze as if afraid he would be angry with her. Mary was the exact opposite, bubbling with excitement and prattling on about how fun it was going to be shopping.

"It's ok, Shelley," Gaignun assured, placing a hand on her shoulder gently. "I don't mind. You don't belong to me. You may do as you please. The same goes for you, Mary."

"Oh I already had that figured out, Master Gaignun. I just couldn't convince this 'un here."

She elbowed her sister playfully. "Master Gaignun, I assure you that things of this nature will not interfere with my work. The Kukai Foundation is top priority."

"Just be happy, Shelley," Gaignun said kindly. "chaos is a wonderful person."

"Yeah," Jr. said, "Besides he's working for us too so I doubt any of it would interfere with anything. Have fun."

"I will, thank you Masters."

"Well let's get outta here!" Mary said, grabbing her sister's arm and practically dragging her out the door. "You two be good now, ya hear?" Mary said, turning back to wink at them before dragging her sister out the door.

"Well." Jr. said, handing the cup back to Gaignun. "That was only a little bit crazy."

"What's crazy? The fact that I'm not upset or the fact that it's chaos?"

Jr. crossed his arms. "The fact that you've still got that coffee cup. Give it here."

Gaignun rolled his eyes and handed it to him. He lifted the boy and started on their way back up the steps. "I can walk."

"But you can't fly."

"You can't either!"

"You thought I was lying."

"Well I changed my mind."

"So I'm honest?"

"No."

"I thought you changed your mind."

"Well you thought wrong."

"Jr., you're not making any sense."

Gaignun took Jr.'s cup and placed it on a small table in one of the hallways. "I make plenty of sense. Why are we going back to the room? I have to work today."

"Repairs have started and a list of potential employees have been made" Gaignun answered, "We don't need to do much but look them over."

"I don't need to do much. You're not working."

"And what am I to do while I don't work?"

Jr. shrugged, "Whatever you want. You're not very good at relaxing, are you?"

"I've suddenly found so much time and I'm so very very unsure of what to do with it."

Gaignun dropped them both onto the bed, kissing the boy sofly. "What do you suggest I do?"

Jr. rolled his eyes. "Is that one of your pick up lines? That supposed to make me melt and swoon? Wrap my arms around you and let you have your way with me?"

"No, actually," Gaignun said, shifting his weight so that he could lie on top of Jr. without hurting him. "I was quite serious."

"Oh..."

Gaignun laughed, "Last night was more than enough." He said, sliding his hand under the boy's shirt to feel soft skin. "Thank you, _Little Master_."

"You are very welcome," Jr. said, pulling playfully on Gaignun's short black hair. "You have been a very good kitty and this pleases me."

"You're so smug." Gaignun said, leaning up to kiss him. He'd never get tired of those lips. He ran a hand up Jr.'s side, surprised when he jerked.

"Something wrong?"

"No."

Gaignun frowned and pulled up the shirt covering his skin. "Oh my god, Jr."

"What?" Jr. asked, looking down. "Oh those?"

"You knew about them?" Gaignun asked, staring at the bruises on Jr.'s hips.

"Yeah and I wasn't going to tell you about them because I knew you'd cry like a little girl about it. But since you already know, I want to try something."

Jr. sat up and grabbed one of Gaignun's hands, angling it just right and placing it over the bruise. It was a perfect match. "That's so cool. It's like a puzzle."

"Jr., this is serious. I--"

"No you're serous. It's just a couple of bruises. You didn't seriously think I'd come out of that unscathed." Jr. could feel that Gaignun was horrified with himself for leaving marks on Jr.'s body and was getting ready to tell him so Jr. shut him up.

"No, you're not a monster. Things like this happen, plus you're like what, twice my size? No, don't you even think about having second thoughts about this for my safety or you're going to have to worry about your's."

"I need to be more careful with you I should've realized..."

"Gaignun, come on. This can't be the first time you've left bruises on someone. You are quite the man-whore."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah, you heard me. I know how you get around or got around before me. I also know that the girls didn't care."

"And you?"

"Me?" Jr. asked, pointing himself. "I would kill you. I know how helpless women are when it comes to you, so I wouldn't hurt her but you would die. Slowly and painfully. Heh. Maybe I'll let Albedo kill you." Jr. said, winking. "That'd be a fitting punishment, huh?"

"Strangely appropriate, yes." Gaignun agreed. "But you won't ever have to worry about that, Jr. No one compares to you."

"That's right." Jr. said. "You remember that."

"I have a feeling it'll be hard to forget." Gaignun said, laying back down on top of him.

"Meaning?"

Gaignun snuggled closer to him, avoiding the bruises on his hips. "I love you." Gaignun sighed.

Jr. relaxed into the bed. "You're such a girl."

"But you love girls."

"That's what I tell them."

Gaignun laughed, completely forgetting about his earlier worries. Jr. was so good at relaxing him. "What? Am I your teddy bear now?" Jr. asked after a little while.

Gaignun nodded, "Yes. A very good one."

He needed to go ahead and tell him. If he wasn't going to work today then he really should wake up Albedo. He'd kept his promise. It was only fair. He delayed it, listening to the contented thoughts in Gaignun's mind. Jr. played with his hair a little longer before taking a deep breath and saying,

"So uh...hey Gaignun?"

"Hm?" The younger responded, nuzzling the his brother's neck.

"I kind of made a deal with Albedo yesterday..."

"A deal?" He asked, his voice hesitant as if afraid of what exactly the deal was.

"Yeah. He wouldn't bother us last night if I read to him today."

"Oh," Gaignun breathed relief, the tension in his body gone instantly. "Is that all?"

Jr. was relieved at his answer. "Yep. Scare you?"

"Yes."

"Consider it payback then."

"Payback?"

"For the bird who hit me."

Gaignun was loath to let go of the small body he had pinned beneath him but it would only be for a little while. A few chapters weren't going to hurt him, in fact it might be nice to listen depending on whatever Jr. picked. With a heavy sigh he got up, placing a quick kiss on his lips and going to find clothes.

"Clothes?" Jr. asked, sitting up.

"Yes, clothes. You need to find some too if Albedo's going to visit."

'He'd probably want the exact opposite'. Jr. thought grudgingly.

"You're right." Gaignun said, amused at the thought. "Therefore..."

Gaignun threw some clothes at him. "Cover up. If he sees those bruises he'll kill me."

He was right. To avoid the insanity of his darker self Jr. pulled on the clothes that he had been given. Gaignun did the same, for once only pulling on a button-up shirt and jeans instead of his usual suit. He turned around to Jr. as the boy was shoving guns into his back pockets.  
"I like this look." Jr. said, pointing to him. "It's the I'm-too-lazy-to-dress-professional look."

"Nice name." Gaignun said, picking up scattered clothes and the fallen piano bench.

Jr. walked over to him. "So what are you going to do? You know, while I read to Albedo?"

"I wasn't sure. I thought I might find something to do in here. I don't want to leave you alone. I will though, if you would like me to."

"Nah, I don't think he'll care." Jr.'s eyes flicked to the piano. "Play something for me."

"Right now?" Gaignun asked.

Jr. nodded, "Yeah. You need practice because you're nowhere near as good as I am."

"Oh right, of course and I am sorely envious of your work."

Jr. nodded, "And you should be."

Gaignun moved to sit on the bench as he pulled the lid up to expose the keys. "Is there anything you want me to play?"

Jr. thought about it for a moment. "Yeah. I want you to play the one you played at the restaurant but first..."

* * *

Albedo was surprised that Jr. had actually kept his promise as he felt the strings of his stasis being pulled apart. He shook off the feeling of sleep and mentally stretched, enjoying the thought of Jr. actually wanting to wake him up instead of finding a way out himself. Music wafted into his mind and he blinked. It sounded familiar. He listened to it for a moment, waiting for his thoughts to find themselves out of sleep. He frowned. He knew this song...

_Sonnez les matines, Albedo!_ Jr. sent in time with the music. Albedo laughed

_Oh how very queer to be awakened in such a warm way. _

_I bet._

"Good morning, Albedo."

_Nigredo._ Albedo said, trying to keep the venom from his thoughts.

"Or afternoon, rather. Jr. is so very lazy."

"And you're stupid. Now, if you're done getting on my nerves, Albedo and I are going to find something to read."

Gaignun nodded and changed his song, moving effortlessly into the beginnings of the one Jr. requested.

_Rubedo, what has possessed you? Why do you ignore your Death for me?_

_We had a deal, stupid. Plus I know how it feels to be cooped up somewhere for a long time. It drives me crazy._

Jr. walked over to their bookshelf and scanned the titles._Somewhere close to your old mentality._

Albedo found the statement amusing. _Particles of such sanity reside here._

_In Jr., please._

_I'm still insane_.

_I think everyone is a little bit_. Jr. found a small black book and hooked the top of his finger on the cover to slide it away from the others. _Your's just lived in a whole different neighborhood than everyone else's._

Jr. felt arms around his neck. _I'm glad it lives within you now, Rubedo._

Gaignun's fingers played along the keys softly, the notes flowing sweetly and wrapping themselves in Jr.'s mind delicately. He smirked. Gaignun wasimn't going to let him completely forget about h. He turned his attention back to the book.

_Alright Albedo, is this book ok?_

_It is fine, Rubedo. _

Gaignun caught a glimpse of the title and smiled before returning back to the keys on the ancient instrument. He wondered if Albedo really cared or not. Jr. walked over to the window seat and sat down. He flipped through the pages.

_So where are we starting? The beginning or random passage number 4?_

_Number 4 as always. _Albedo grinned.

Jr. shut the book then gathered the all the pages in one hand. He placed his thumb over the beginning of the group, ready to flip through them and closed his eyes.

_Go._

Jr.'s thumb slipped back, allowing the pages to slid under his hand until...

_Stop._

Without opening his eyes he placed a finger at the top of the page, sliding down imagined print until Albedo again told him to stop. Blue eyes opened onto black ink and he climbed onto the window seat, pressing his back against the wall.

_You woke up just to fall asleep again. _Jr. commented, shuffling to make room for him. He expected Albedo to sit beside him. He wondered if there would be enough room or if he'd have to move but when his twin appeared he appeared as his smaller self. Albedo looked up at him through clear purple eyes and smiled juvenile innocence. Before Jr. could voice his confusion Albedo squirmed his way into his arms. He laid his head on Jr.'s chest under his right arm so that he could read the words. Gaignun looked over there, alert to all the motion. Jr. looked back at him and shrugged. Gaignun shook his head at the sight. It was strangely heart warming. He used to watch them like that all the time, wishing to be a part of the thing they combined to create. A flurry of twisting notes resounded beautifully from the piano. He didn't have to worry about that anymore. Jr. was his. But...It was nice to know that he would have someone to take care of him after his death. Someone who loved him as much as Gaignun did. Jr.'s favorite measure of notes played past his ears and he caught the edges of a smile on his lips. Until then what harm could it do for Albedo to have a few innocent moments with his older half? Gaignun owed him that much probably more. Albedo pointed to a place in the book, urging Jr. to read for him.

Jr. nodded and slid down a little more in order to get more comfortable.

_Henceforth I fly not--_

_No, Rubedo. _The young Albedo frowned, shaking his head and pouting. _Aloud. I want to hear your voice._

Jr. sighed and rolled his eyes as if such an action was the most difficult task ever asked of him. But it was just for show and Albedo smiled excitedly when Jr.'s voice was the sound that filled his ears instead of his thoughts and snuggled closer to him.

"Henceforth I fly not death, nor would prolong life much, bent rather how I may quit fairest and easiest of this cumbrous charge which I must keep til my appointed day of rendering up, and patiently attend my dissolution. Micheal replied,"

Gaignun couldn't stop himself from listening. He loved the strangely hypnotic tone Jr.'s voice took when he read. His playing softened to slow echoes of their earlier crescendo, as if hanging on to their past magnificence before slowly vanishing and letting go.

"Nor love thy life, nor hate; but what thou liv'st live well, how long or short permit to Heaven."

* * *

A/N: Thank you all so much or reading. I hope you enjoyed it. C:


	43. Tribute

Well here we go! Tribute time! CX Time to answer all of these questions. Some of them are ridiculous. XD Just a warning. They're posted in the order they were sent in so I didn't pick favorites! XD How could I possibly when you're all so great? DX I"ve given all of them silly titles too taken from reviews or PM's. You guys make me chuckle. XD

Right, on with it!  
Wait...do I need a disclaimer? Well I don't Xenosaga or the characters so you can't sue me!

* * *

**~~~Eyebrows Are Important On the Kukai Foundation~~~  
Ganon XD**

**To chaos: If you were on a Team, what would it be?**

**chaos: **Well I'm unsure if I should answer this question or if I want to be in on this war that is hopefully over between the two teams, but I suppose I would be Team Jr. As long as he's happy and Albedo's not peeling his skin like an orange I'm fine with whoever he chooses.

**To Gaignun: If Jr. got his hands on the most dangerous and powerful weapon in the world what would you do?**

**Gaignun: **I would run and I suggest you to do the same. Jr. does not think twice about firing weapons or aiming them for that matter.  
**Jr.:** What the hell's that supposed to mean?

**To Gaignun again:** **If you could get Jr, in all his stubborness (but that's ok, cuz you're cool like that and I know you could do it) if you could get him to do anything you want for one whole day (besides paperwork) and cosplay included, what would it be? XD**  
**  
Gaignun:** Cosplay? Well...  
**Jr: **Gaignun, don't even think about it.  
**Gaignun: **Surprisingly I have never tried cosplay but I suppose if we were to try it and I could coax Jr. into a dress we would be Little Orphan Annie and Oliver Warbucks.  
**Jr.:** No! Hell no!  
**Gaignun:** It makes sense, Jr. You're my "adopted" son. I'm the rich billionaire "father" You've even got the red hair, probably the height too.  
**Jr.:** I'm not a little girl!  
**Gaignun:** And I'm not fifty-two years old, but see that's ok. If you wear the dress you don't have to call me Daddy Warbucks. Daddy's just fine.  
**Jr.:** That's never going to happen! Ignore every single thing he just said!

**to chaos: What would you do if you saw Jr. doing(whatever Gaignun's answer is)? XD  
**

**chaos:** Oh well I would um...  
**Jr.:** He wouldn't do anything. He would leave and never tell anyone about what he saw.  
**chaos:** Well yes I would and leave and I wouldn't tell anyone but I would have to mercilessly tease Jr. about all of this later.  
**Jr.: **Are you trying to fight me, chaos?  
**chaos:** For once I think I am.

**to Jr.: You're locked in Gaignun's room and Mary's taken your guns and you've got nothing on under your skimpy bunny suit and Gaignun's there with you. Escape options would be...? XD **

**Jr.:** What the hell?! There's no fucking way I'd ever be in a damn bunny suit skimpy or otherwise! What's wrong with you?!  
**Gaignun:** This cosplay thing could get interesting.  
**Jr.:** ...Alright you know what? My escape plan is to fucking kill Gaignun and use his bloody suit to cover myself with to get my guns.  
**Albedo:** Now this idea I thoroughly approve of.

**to Canaan:** **we all know you're expressionless and that's awesome, but if you saw chaos trapped in a room in a skimpy nurse's outfit on, what would your expression be then?**

**Canaan:** The very same as my current expression however, I would ask him if he has been in a threesome with the Kukais lately, as they seem to be getting into more cosplay/fetish-type things.

**to Canaan: Jr.'s jacket gets snagged on somtehing and he somehow ends up completely tangled and can't get loos and he just recently pulled a huge prank on you. Revenge would be?**

**Canaan:** If such a thing were to happen and Rubedo would not be able to get loose I would listen to him ask for help then take his guns and leave him there. Nigredo will find him eventually.

**to chaos: Why is Jr. immortal?**

**chaos:** Jr.'s immortality stems from his body's ability to completely stop any growth at all down to the celluar level w-**Jr.: **chaos how do you know all that stuff?  
**Albedo:** The answer is simple, dear Rubedo. Cupid is more than he appears.  
**Jr.:** What a matchmaker? He have firey arrows now?  
**Albedo:** Dear Cupid, why not tell them the truth? It is branded on the boy's right hand.  
**Jr: **What the hell are you talking about Albedo?  
**Albedo:** Why the mark of the beast, Rubedo. How else would Cupid find you after being given such instructions.  
**Jr.: **What instructions?!  
**Gaignun:** And God said unto chaos: Keep him away from me.  
**Albedo:** Wonderful Nigredo! Absolutely splendid!  
**Jr.: **I hate everyone in this fucking room!  
**chaos: **Well...I hope that answers your question.

**to Ziggy: Your swimsuit...why...?**

**Ziggy: **I do not own swimwear. Why would a cyborg need anything like that?  
**Jr.:** Aw come on, Ziggy. I know you like the beach. Pretend like you don't but I know the truth.  
**Ziggy:** I do not own a swimsuit. I am a cyborg and have no need for one.  
**Albedo:** Oh, but my mechanical man you should obtain one immediately  
**Ziggy:** ...

**to Yuriev Soldier: How did it feel to get knocked up by chaos? (no pun intended)**

**Yuriev Soldier: **Well it didn't feel good but it didn't feel bad...I kind of don't really remember anything about it...What? Wanted a better answer? Well I'm not exciting. You can go ahead.  
**chaos:** Every character is important and you were very kind to me. Thank you and I hope I didn't harm you too badly.  
**Yuriev Soldier**:...It was awesome.

* * *

**~~Jr. Got Bored And Decided To Play It His Way Because Jr.'s Rebel~~  
Tuahla**

**To Jr: Does thinking you're smexy make me a pedo?  
Jr: **Hell yeah it does you sick freak. It makes all of you pedophiles. That's alright though. I have that affect on people. I'm just _that _sexy.

**To Gaignun: If it wasn't for piesta solo, would you and Mary and/or Shelley ever have kids? Would it be like a Mormon family? Could Jr be one of your "wives" too, and ya'll could star in a reality show like "Big Love"?  
Gaignun: **It might seem rude to ask but are you crazy? Trying to get Jr. to share me would not go over well. I'm very afraid he would actually go through with his earlier threat and here would come Albedo. Are you trying to plot my death? However, even if I did manage to get him to agree to such a thing I would never have children. Jr. may be an adult but he's all the child I'll ever need.  
**Jr.:** I'm going to pretend that you didn't just say that. Yeah, go ahead and laugh. We'll see how funny it is after I blow a few holes in your face.  
**Gaignun:** Forgive me Jr. I don't think you would want kids either.  
**Jr.:** You're right I wouldn't. If we did have a reality show it would be something like "The Real Chance of Love". Gaignun will be the gorgeous, elegant, sweet one and I'll be the hot bad boy with the attitude problem. Then at the end we'll confess to everyone that we were just kidding. We're gay for each other. Hah! Talk about epic fail!

**To Jr: Why does Gaignun get to have a harem when you're just as hot? Do you at least have a fan club of teeny bopper fangirls?**  
**Jr.: **Um, hello? Twelve over here. I'm jail bait. Living breathing jail bait.  
**Albedo:** Hmm, indeed you are, Rubedo.  
**Jr.:** The point is that I can't have a harem because of my physical appearance. Isn't that sort of obvious? What's a teeny bopper anyway? You have the same accent as Mary, did you know that? What planet are you from again?  
**Gaignun:** She means fangirls, Jr.  
**Jr: **Oh! Yeah I've got them. Too bad I'm not a pedophile. I might be able to be a playboy like Gaignun.

**To Albedo: Are you more or less insane and evil as Hitler? Is your insanity more like schizophrenia, or some other mental illness?**  
**Albedo: **Illness? What illness? You define me by the standards of normalcy that are collapsable and nonexistant. Weight upon usele-  
**Jr.:** Just answer the goddamn question, Albedo.  
**Albedo:** Many voices whisper to me but they make up one. U-DO speaks to his chosen victims so I would say it is more like divine harrassment. Pulling out the fears and forcing you against them.  
**Jr.:** You were never exactly sane to begin with though. Hah! I guess you had a phobia! Let's ask Gaignun. He's the phobia police.  
**Gaignun:** Autophobia is the fear of being alone.  
**Albedo:** Thank you Nigredo for your pointless knowledge. Now leave us. I need to talk with Rubedo...  
**Jr.:** Uh...

**To Albedo: Why didn't you kill that bitch Citrine when you were little?  
Albedo: **Rubedo would never have allowed such a thing. He has such a weak spot for life. If I had taken any action against her surely Nigredo would have hindered her death. He had a thing for her.  
**Gaignun: **I never had a thing for her, Albedo.  
**Albedo: **And yet you were seen in public with her. Oh lies upon lies, Death.  
**Gaignun:** There was nothing between us. Ask Yuriev, it wasn't me. I do resent the title "bitch" in reference to her. She was merely misguided. Albedo was misguided and no one called him a bastard.  
**Jr.:** Heh. I did.

**To Albedo:** **If Gaignun died, and Jr fell for you, would you be able to be happy, or would your ultimate goal still be for Jr to kill you?  
Albedo:** Oh my dear, this is only a matter of time. Why should I die when I have eternity now to spend with Rubedo. Now that we are one, my death would automatically mean his as well. Oh how lovely and romantic such an ideal! No, Rubedo will be mine. Immortaility is where the boy resides and where he shall stay.  
**Jr.:** Can we not talk about this?

**To the URTVs: Is it possible for all of you to be happy at once (and all be alive)?  
Jr.:** You see the ones who are alive now? Yeah, that's about all you're gonna get.

**To Gaignun: What are those strange things poking you in the back?  
Gaignun: **Albedo shattered fragments of my spinal cord when he threw my body down the stairs on the Durandal.  
**Jr: **Yeah. You should have been careful you bastard!  
**Albedo:** And do what? Allow the slayer to rip open his dragon and drink your blood from his goblet? Perhaps I should help him? Hold you down for the blade. You have the most delicious blood, flower.  
**Gaignun:** Alright, that's enough, Albedo. The strange things are metallic replacements of destroyed vertebrae. I can't feel them now but they were very much there for the first few weeks.

**To Jr.:** **Why are you afraid of nothing but act like a little girl when watching scary movies?**  
**Jr.:** I did not act like a little girl! It was Albedo! He was the scared one!  
**Albedo:** Fear? Fear in action I have taken? Fear of lesser techniques carried out by lesser serial killers? Rubedo. I am Fear.  
**Gaignun:** What they mean to say is that Jr.- and yes Jr. not Albedo - gets too caught up in movies. It's not really fear so much as surprise. Sometimes he'll actually shoot at the screen. Thank goodness he didn't then.  
**Jr.:** Eh, you were too sick to be dodging bullets. Maybe next time.

**To Gaignun:** **If Jr leaves a Makarov lying around and it goes off and no one's there to hear it, does it make a sound?  
Gaignun:** Yes, in fact it does. It's the sound of shattering glass and a shocked droid smashing onto the ground of the dock where the poor thing explodes.  
**Jr.:** What? I didn't tell him to pull the trigger!  
**Gaignun:** You didn't have to. It went off by itself. Jr., perhaps new technology would better suit you than these malfunctioning weapons.  
**Jr.:** And maybe you should shut the fuck up before I shut you up. Eastwood didn't need lazers and neither do I.

* * *

**~We need him for the sexy! DX~  
Albedo's Jerusalem**

**Albedo! Are you aware that I absolutely 100% worship the ground you walk on?**  
**Albedo:** Ah, Jason mon petit fanboy I am aware. Be careful where you tread however you might get blood on your clothes and we can't have that now can we?

**Everyone! How do you feel about your teams?  
Albedo: **I adore my followers. Beautiful sheep blindly following their shepard. Only you understood my twisted love of perfection! The love of the Dragon. Is Nigredo not dangerous?! The graves you have constructed for me are magnificent! How could I ever be displeased at such glorious work? Supportive yet vicious. Accepting yet bloodthirsty. We indeed know the truth about Rubedo, don't we?  
**Gaignun:** I appreciate my team but I am also disappointed in their behavoir. You were determined to murder this author weren't you? It may seem like I'm scolding you and in a way I am. I am impressed with your devotion, however. With a Team as fired up as you there was no way I was not going to win Rubedo. I'm certain that if Albedo had won you would have fully manifested my title of Death.  
**Jr.: **I like my team because no one's fucking crazy and they gave me a choice. Me! Whatever made me happy! They didn't treat me like some goddamn trophy. Yeah. Hope you're all ashamed of yourselves.  
**Albedo:** Mon Précieux you are a trophy! A most glorious prize for the fitting suitor.  
**Gaignun: **He's right. I think this is one thing we can both agree on.  
**Jr:** And one thing that I can hate you both for at the same time.

**Jr.! Why can't you just love Albedo? D':**

**Jr.: **Hello?! Did you see what he did to me? Like from fucking chapter two to chapter twenty nine he did nothing but torment me! Not to mention all that shit he's done in the past! But I do love him even if I'm not in love with him. And I do forgive him since he kept his promise and saved Gaignun. He apologized to MOMO too so I guess I can't be too furious with him. At least not until the next time he screws up.

**Gaignun! Do you have a phobia of pudding or was that another lie? You liar!**

**Gaignun:** No, I never had a phobia of pudding although I detest being covered in it. So I suppose I'm a liar.  
**Jr.: **Come on, Jason. That question's unfair. He was just teasing.  
**Albedo:** I find it the fairest of all the questions, Rubedo. Mirror mirror on the wall. What is that you see, Nigredo?

**Albedo! If Gaignun 'accidentally' slipped on a banana peel and died would you laugh or would you pretend you had nothing to do- I mean would you be sad?  
Albedo:** I would be sad of course because Rubedo would be devastated. As for the actual death of him I'm sure I could find a much more fitting end to my most despised person. Rubedo would never believe that something so simple could come from me...  
**Jr.:** ...Gaignun watch your step from now on, ok?

**MOMO! If Jr. decided that he would share himself between you, Gaignun, and Albedo would you be up for that?**

**MOMO:** Well I uh...um...  
**Ziggy:** Absolutely not. Nothing like that will ever happen.  
**Jr.:** Aw come on old man. I'd be so much sweeter to her than either of them.  
**Ziggy:** And Albedo would be happy with that arrangement? The answer is no.  
**chaos:** He's right Jr. if she reminds him of Sakura and you start paying more attention to her...  
**Jr.:** Fine Jeez!

**Gaignun! You are a man whore, aren't you. Tell the truth! **  
**  
Gaignun:** I prefer the term pimp, however I guess such a thing could be true. I was quite the playboy.  
**Jr.:** Were! That's the key word here.  
**Albedo:** Be nice to Rubedo's heart or else you might lose your's, Nigredo.

**Jr.! This is something that has been thrown back and forth between Albedist and Gaignunist since the chapter Resist. Tell them the truth. Was your second "encounter" with Albedo willing or not?**

**Jr:** Do I have to answer in front of Gaignun?  
**Gaignun:** It's ok, Jr.  
**Jr.: **Then yeah. It was willing. There, everyone happy?  
**Albedo:** I most certainly am, Mon Preciuex  
**Gaignun: **Well it's over and I won so it doesn't matter. Leave him alone Gaignunists.

* * *

**~RIP ALBEDO D:~  
The Original Oxymoron**

**Albedo:  
1. Do you have a man crush on Ziggy?**  
**Albedo:**Oh my mechanical beast! Such a marvelous mechanized monster. He makes me absolutely weak with admiration. Such a wonderful mass of automated being! What being could not have a "crush" on such an animatron?

**2. What's your favorite thing about Rubedo?  
****Albedo:**The very way his eyes burn with that absolute undeniable hatred. Even now I want that fire to burn away all the deep blue. Oh what passion my Rubedo embodies!

**  
3. CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER?!**

**Albedo:** Ah but of course, ma amie. It is 667. Right between Rubedo and Nigredo. Just as I should be.  
**Jr.: **That's not what she meant Albedo...

**Gaignun:  
4. Do you think it's fair that Albedo gives up everything for Rubedo and you already have sexy ladies and men swooning over you but you STILL take him?! T_T**

**Gaignun:** You make it seem as if I am ungrateful. It is true that Albedo has given perhaps more than I ever could but no one compares to Jr. and I would do anything for him. I plan to spend the rest of my time alive making up for the mistakes I have made. Unlike Albedo, who has been fully redeemed, I'm afraid some of my crimes against him are unforgiveable and irrevocable. But I plan to do what I can.  
**Albedo:** Death can paint it as pretty as he wants but no. It's not.

**Jr.:  
5. If Albedo and Gaignun weren't there, who would you date? MOMO? Mary or Shelley? Shion?  
****Jr.: **Definately MOMO. She'd probably be my first choice but then again I like Mary a lot. She's always kind of had a thing for me even if she's one of Gaignun's girls and she's a lot of fun. Shelley's beautiful but I just don't see it for some reason. Especially now since she's with chaos. Man, who saw that coming? That's crazy! Shion? Nah. She's pretty cool but we wouldn't get along. I have a feeling she'd take some of my pranks a little too personally and Shion could probably kick my ass if she wanted to. Our fights would be actual fights. Let's just keep it on the friend level.

**6. Do you have the innate ability to attract sexy men? D':**  
**  
Jr.:** Well I am a sexy man myself so of course. What the hell kind of question was that? We've got actual pedophiles here that want a piece of me. Oh shit I just remembered something. Hey Gaignun? What happened to those pictures Mary took?

**7. Do you mind being short/childlike, or do you embrace the perks?**

**Jr.: **At times it can get annoying but I can get away with a lot of things because of it. Or well...when Gaignun or the Godwins aren't around anyway...or chaos...or Canaan..Wait, why did I say I liked it again?

**MOMO:  
8. Are you sad about Jr.? Do you think you'll ever go out with anyone else?  
****MOMO:**Well I am a little upset about Jr. But I'm really glad that he's happy and that Albedo's being nice again.  
**Jr.:** You're really sweet, MOMO.  
**MOMO:** N-no it's the truth! I'd like to think that I'll meet someone else but I don't think I'll look for a while.

**Ziggy:  
9. DID YOU KNOW ALBEDO TOTALLY HAS A MAN CRUSH ON YOU?!  
****Ziggy:**Yes I have noticed this and I can't say that I'm flattered.  
**Albedo:** Don't lie, my beautiful construction. You and I--  
**Jr.:** That's enough Albedo! Calm the fuck down! The old man doesn't want you and I don't want him either so unless you find a body soon I'd rather you not try to rub all over him.

**AND WITHOUT FURTHER 'ADO...**

**Citrine:  
10. I am sorry you had to die, I did like your character... however -slap- WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO MEAN TO YOUR BROTHERS? Your dad obviously doesn't care... Also were you aware of that? Did it hurt you?**

**Citrine: **Slap me again and I'll have to kill you. Why should I be nice to them? They're failures. Whether my father cares for my well being isn't a concern. The only thing that matters is the fulfillment of his ideals. His word is law and it didn't hurt one bit to die for his cause.

* * *

**~~Blind Jr. and see who he runs into first!~~  
CE412**

**1. Albedo. If Gaignun had gone with Jr., and out of heart-break, MOMO came running to you, would you take her as your own? Or just screw with her head and go back to Jr.-huntin'?**  
**Albedo:** Ma Pêche, such a sweet little imitation. I'm afraid she is not enough for my thirst. Only the liquid in Rubedo's veins will satisfy me!

**2. Nigredo/Dmitri. How often did your dad do... 'bad' things to you/How often did you do taboo stuff with your son? *coughincestuouscough*  
**

**Dmitri: **Taboo? Besides taking over his body and trying to murder his disgusting little boyfriend? Things of the incestous nature hm? I'll admit I gave into a few urges in order to break in the new body you could say.  
**Jr.: **Gaignun is that true?  
**Gaignun:** ...  
**Jr.:** I'll fucking kill you again you bastard!

**3. Dmitri. Why Gaignun? Why not Helmer? Perhaps no killing-Red-Dragon-ness, but if you acted well-enough, you wouldn't be getting your butt kicked right now. You're supposed to be BA along with Albedo. **  
**  
Dmitri:** Are you implying that I am lesser in comparison with a failure? Surely not! Nigredo was specifically designed for me and therefore my perfect skin. A custom made suit waiting its big debut.  
**Jr.:** You disgusting bastard! No wonder Albedo's sick. He must've gotten the sadism gene from you you fucking monster!  
**Citrine:** Quiet Rubedo or else we'll have to fight again and this time your little friends won't be there to help.

**4. Rubedo. If Albedo was not crazy [or in your head] , would you go to him with open arms/choose him over Gaignun? **  
**Jr.: **Um...I am not at liberty to discuss this question.  
**chaos:** I have a feeling it's the same as the Sakura/MOMO dilema.  
**Jr.: **Well that's not why I'm afraid to answer. I'm afraid of the teams. God knows what they'll do.  
**Gaignun: **They'll be good. Go ahead and answer. We all know the truth.  
**Jr.:** ...maybe...  
**Albedo:** Oh Rubedo! Mon Précieux! My red rose, my passionate dragon!  
**Jr.:** Stop touching me! I said maybe! Maybe!!

**5. chaos. WHY did you leave Albedo and rescue the Rub/Nig but leave Albedo? Seriously, WTH?**  
**chaos:** I didn't have time. Jr. and Gaignun were in terrible shape and they seemed to be the only ones alive. We did search for Albedo but couldn't find him and had no choice but to evacuate.  
**Canaan:** It's not chaos' fault it's mine. I told him we had no choice and he didn't really have any say in the matter.  
**Albedo: **I do not harbor any misgivings for my defective Cupid. At least he saved my Rubedo.  
**chaos:** Thank you, Albedo. It means a lot.

**6-9. Albedo, Nigredo, Rubedo, Dmitri. If you could each have 1 wish, what would it be?  
No wishing for people [Al!], infinite power [Dmitri! D: ], well-being, deaths, or riches.  
Albedo: **I wish for Rubedo.  
**Jr.:** You can't wish for me, idiot! That's the rule! Get off me!  
**Gaignun:** I wish that Albedo would get off of Jr.  
**Albedo:** Curse you, Nigredo!  
**Jr.: **I wish Gaignun was immortal.  
**Gaignun:** That's a sweet thought, Jr. but I think that might fall under the well-being category.  
**Jr.:** What? You going all suicidal on me? Do you want to die, Gaignun?  
**Dmitri:** I wish all of my sons were dead.  
**Jr.:** You can't wish for that either, jackass!  
**Albedo:** I wish for Nigredo to die.  
**Jr.: **You guys can't wish for things like that! Were you even listening to the rules?!  
**Albedo: **I wish for Rubedo to stop talking.  
**Gaignun:** That was a good one, Albedo.  
**Dmitri:** I wish this question was over.

**10. Tylida [HEY. You were mentioned in the story. You mentioned yourself. In the begginning and end. Don't judge me.]. Will you make anoooother, or will the Albedists have to go rogue and eat your innards and outtards and hair? ... X3  
Tylida: **My hair?! D: No! *hides* Actually I have a few ideas for a couple of stories. I say a couple b/c I mean two! D: Le Gasp! As Jessi would say. XD  
I really don't have an idea for a sequel and couldn't ever imagine Conflicting Numbers having an actual sequel. I think I've cutscened it out. XD It's dead and tired so I plan to let it sleep. But I've got an idea for an AlbedoxJr. story and a GaignunxJr. story. The second mainly b/c I can't see the Gaignunists letting me get away with that if I don't even it out. XD I've actually started on both already but I'm a little hesitant to post them. Nothing will ever amount to the greatness that is CN.

* * *

**~~~If I Have To Write a Eulogy For Gaignun Then I'll Have To Write One For You Too~~~  
Nigredo's Oblivion**

**Ziggy? If I show you a picture of what your swimsuit looks like in the game will you please explain to me why in the world you would ever wear something like that?**

**Ziggy: **I do not own a swimsuit. I never will. This picture does not make sense. My legs are metallic and in here they are definately human or perhaps Realian. I would never be seen in something so ridiculous.  
**MOMO:** Oh Ziggy! You look so cute in this!  
**Ziggy:** MOMO you can't be serious.  
**MOMO:** Come on! Let's get Jr. and go find you a bathing suit so you can play with us!  
**Ziggy:** MOMO I don't think that is necessary.  
**Jr.:** Aw, come on old man. What? You don't want to play?  
**MOMO: **Please Ziggy?  
**Ziggy:** ...

**Gaignun? Why in the world would you try to kill yourself when you finally got free?  
**

**Gaignun: **I thought that I wouldn't be able to control myself. Even if Dmitri isn't here the power to destroy Jr. is and I'm unsure if or when it will reappear. I didn't want Jr. to be alone and Albedo has always wanted to be with Jr. I knew he would take care of him if I couldn't. He always has in a way.

**Albedo? Why were you in your child form at the end of the story?  
Albedo: **I thought it would ease both Nigredo and Rubedo's minds. I seem less threatening in such a form and Rubedo is more willing to accept such an image. To be accepted by Rubedo means everything.

**Jr.? Are you going to physically age now that you and Albedo are together? Does that affect your growth in any way or are we all bound to be hopeless pedos for the rest of our lives?  
Jr.: **Huh. I'm not sure. What do you think, Albedo?  
**Albedo:** It could be a possibility perhaps. However only our spirits remain one as my body contains the evil that is our creator. Without the actual merge of flesh it could be an impossibility.  
**Jr.:** That's a maybe then...I guess? I don't know. Whatever. Maybe. There's your answer. Guess we'll see.

**Gaignun? If Jr. was as old as you physically would you still be seme?**

**Gaignun: **Jr. dominant? Well I--  
**Jr.: **Hell no he wouldn't! I'd hold him down and ride him like--  
**chaos:** Jr. I'm not sure if that's appropriate.  
**Jr.:** What? chaos you're the one who's always comparing us the horsemen of the apocalypse.  
**chaos:** I never intended for the metaphor to be used in that way...  
**Jr.:** The point is yes.  
**Gaignun:** I guess we'll never know.  
**Jr.:** We might know! We might!

**Albedo? What about you? Would you ever be submissive to Jr.?**  
**  
Albedo:** Rubedo can do whatever he wishes to me. As long as I am his.  
**Jr.:** Albedo you're a masochistic mess.  
**Albedo:** You are perfection, mon Rubedo.

**Albedo? Do you know why the caged bird sings?**

**Albedo:** For Rubedo! It sings for Rubedo! It sings to be free from its confining cage to make Jr. his own! To rip the bars with blood soaked talons! To bathe in the liquid of the keeper who placed him there! Oh with such devastating purpose does it sing!  
**Jr.:** ...Gaignun? I thought you said Albedo was better. He still ranting.

**Albedo? Did you ever find out about the bruises?  
Albedo: **Bruises?  
**Jr.:** Aw shit.  
**Gaignun: **Who's team where you on?

**Gaignun? Do you have any idea how loud Team Gaignun squeals everytime you give cute little Jr. a bath?**  
**  
Jr:** Do you know how many bullets it takes to kill a squealing fanboy?  
**Gaignun:** Jr. why do you always have to be so rude? It wasn't an insult. He said you were cute.  
**Jr.:** And that's insulting! I am not cute! I'm not!  
**Gaignun:** Yes you are.  
**Jr.:** I am not! I'm sexy! Say it Gaignun! Say it!  
**Gaignun:** You're sexy, Jr.  
**Jr.:** That's right!  
**Gaignun:** ...in a cute way.  
**Jr.:** Goddamnit Gaignun!

* * *

That was fun. XD A lot of fun so yay! I hope all your questions have been answered...or at least you liked the answers anyway.

Before I go, yeah I know why am I holding you back? You may leave. XD I just have to say thank you and give writers credit for things and stuff.

First and foremost I have to thank **jap0911**  
jap0911 had written a previous story called **Between 666,667, and 669.** Until then I hadn't even entertained the idea of a love triangle between them. XD Her Jr. is a lot different than mine, but I liked it none the less. It only had 3 chapters though before she abandoned it. :( So with her permission I decided to save it...or sort of...I really don't think hers was going in this direction...

So hurray! Thank you jap0911 for making me realize GaignunxJr. 'Cus they're great!

Ok, since I either stole their stuff or was inspired by their things let's get on with the music and books deal.

Oh Franky boy you sly dog. XD Mary Shelley's Frankenstein  
John Gardener's Grendel  
John Milton's Paradise Lost

Um...right I think that's all the books. *pokes*

Poetry!  
Wallace Steven's "The Emperor of Ice Cream"  
Emily Dickinson's "Because I Could Not Stop For Death"  
Oh and of course God Old Willy! Romeo and Juliet whatnot. I think I migh thave stolen a few other things from him...  
So just William Shakespeare in general!

Huh...Is that all? I thought I was more of theif than that.

Ok music, now here's the thing with the music it's the big one. It's like Inspiration Nation here and the song that sparked the actual going through with this story was Hans Zimmerman's Davy Jones. Why? I have no freakin' idea. Just happened. XD  
The reason these songs are inspiring are totally random. It could run from lyrics to actual music to just the way the singer sounds. If I had been on Miltia I would've been dead the moment the song started.

The story itself:  
Zimmerman's "Davy Jones"  
Clint Mansell's "Requiem for a Dream"- (not Beethoven's original Lux Aeterna that one just screams Wilhelm to me for some reason.)  
Red's "Breathe Into Me"

Albedo:  
Rule of Rose's Theme Song  
Kanye West's "Amazing"  
Mindless Self Indulence's "Diabolical"  
Breaking Benjamin's "Diary of Jane"  
Inner Party System's "Don't Stop"  
Yuki Kajura's "Here He Comes #2"  
Apocalyptica's "I Don't Care"  
Three Days Grace's "Just Like You"  
My Chemical Romance's "The Sharpest Lives" and "This Is How I Disappear"  
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus' "You Better Pray"

Gaignun:  
Kid Cudi's "Day 'n Nite"  
Apocalyptica's version of "Nothing Else Matters"  
Disturbed's "The Night"  
Nine Inch Nails- "Only"  
Red's "Hide" and "Lost"  
Shinedown's "Second Chance"  
Panic! At the Disco's "Camisado"  
30 Seconds To Mars' "A Beautiful Lie"

Jr.:  
Madonna's "Die Another Day"  
Framing Hanely's "Lollipop"  
Jason Marz's "Do What You Do"  
Three Day's Grace's "I Hate Everything About You" and "Never Too Late"  
Dashboard Confessional's "Vindicated"

Gaignun/Jr.:  
Dashboard Confessional's "You Have Stolen My Heart"  
The Main's "Time To Go"  
Linkin Park's "Lying From You"

Albedo/Jr.:  
Rihanna's "Disturbia"  
Shinedown's "Sound of Madness"  
Emilie Autumn's "Rose Red"  
Three Day's Grace's "Just Like You"

Gaignun/Albedo: Apocalyptica's "Hope" and "Worlds Collide".

* * *

Ha! There we go. There's all the inspiration I stole from! Phew! But of course I have to thank all of you again!

And actually, some parts in this story were made by suggestions from you.  
The Original Oxymoron gave me the idea to tell where Albedo's 100-series came from and to also make a crazy Gaignun b/c "that'd be a win!" XD  
C412 gave me the idea to have Albedo still alive and able to move around instead of sleeping inside Jr. half dead. XD That would suck.

Ganon XD- Anything and everything Gaignun-related  
Albedo's Jerusalem-Anything and everything Albedo-related

Phew! Now I am done! This is it! The very very last update. D:

By now you are all tired of me anyway. XD So now I shall leave and get started on revision of this thing...*siiigh* and get started on the first couple of chapter's for Albedo's story!  
Gaignunists?....Give me a little more time. You're allowed to read Albedo things too! XD

Alright then! Goodbye everyone! CX


End file.
